# What's your supervillainy rampage? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 30, 2011, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-supervillainy-rampage/598166 "2011-09-30T15:46:53Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2011, 8:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-supervillainy-rampage/598166/41 "2011-10-04T20:46:05Z")
Insurance companies. My superpower is the ability to retire to Fortress of Fear and use the Computer of Doom to hack into the financial accounts of every health insurance company, and divert all of their assets into Zimbabwean bonds, thereby cause a nationwide collapse of private health insurance. ---
**Author:** ![Dread\_Pirate\_Jimbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dread_pirate_jimbo/32/3897_2.png) [@Dread\_Pirate\_Jimbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dread_Pirate_Jimbo)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2011, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-supervillainy-rampage/598166/42 "2011-10-04T21:40:23Z")
> [@carnivorousplant](#): > > She’s wearing camouflage. You are Foiled Again, Dread Pirate Jimbo! > > 🙂 Gah! Damned camouflage! I was so close to triumph too. No matter. The master plan will go ahead as scheduled and there’s nothing anyone can do to stop it. Mwah-ha-ha-HA! ---
**Author:** ![Silver\_Tyger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/fbc32d/32.png) [@Silver\_Tyger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silver_Tyger)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2011, 10:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-supervillainy-rampage/598166/43 "2011-10-04T22:18:11Z")
> [@carnivorousplant](#): > > She’s wearing camouflage. You are Foiled Again, Dread Pirate Jimbo! > > 🙂 Wrong. Black corduroys, yellow dress shirt, yellow, blue, and beige plaid vest. Do your worst **Jimbo**. I have powers beyond your comprehension. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2011, 10:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-supervillainy-rampage/598166/44 "2011-10-04T22:27:37Z")
> [@Silver Tyger Girl](#): > > Wrong. Black corduroys, yellow dress shirt, yellow, blue, and beige plaid vest. > > Do your worst **Jimbo**. I have powers beyond your comprehension. 😉 How many times must I tell you to STOP SAYING THINGS LIKE THAT? :mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad: Anyway…I’m sending a dozen Cheetara and Tygra clones to get you out of the mess you just got yourself into to. ---
**Author:** ![CanvasShoes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/74df32/32.png) [@CanvasShoes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CanvasShoes)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 12:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-supervillainy-rampage/598166/45 "2011-10-05T00:01:13Z")
Supersonic ultra bass killer. Any time some inconsiderate ass insists upon forcing his “music” down others’ throats (particularly at 2am in a residential area), my super weapon will take out his stereo for a minimum of 2 hours. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 12:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-supervillainy-rampage/598166/46 "2011-10-05T00:16:24Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > Anyway…I’m sending a dozen Cheetara and Tygra clones to get you out of the mess you just got yourself into to. …If they can find her…:dubious: ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 12:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-supervillainy-rampage/598166/47 "2011-10-05T00:39:06Z")
I will have an invisible force bubble around me that causes all the cyclists on the sidewalk to go flinging off into traffic as I walk along. It only gets activated at speeds of five miles per hour or over so other pedestrians can walk safely as well. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 12:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-supervillainy-rampage/598166/48 "2011-10-05T00:44:09Z")
> [@carnivorousplant](#): > > …If they can find her…:dubious: I keep repeater-scopes trained on S’kat and a few other Dopers at all times for just such occasions. What? ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 1:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-supervillainy-rampage/598166/49 "2011-10-05T01:24:40Z")
I would use the vast reserves of accumulated cash from stealing all the gold out of Fort Knox and the knickers out of Emma Stone’s laundry hamper to manufacture IC’s for car stereos, which would be of indisputably excellent quality, but sold at a loss so steep that their use would be soon adopted by the entire industry. Once the Muddy IC’s were truly ubiquitous, their undocumented feature would be enabled, and any devices played at volumes likely to cause discomfort or annoyance to fellow commuters on a regular basis would automatically lock up, outputting only mp3 audio of Paul Anka’s _“Having My Baby”_ on an endless loop, and preventing the user from turning the volume down, turning the unit off, or switching to another function. Key in the ignition? It’s all Anka, all the time - and at the bone-rattling, bowel-emptying volume that triggered the trap in the first place. [maniacal laughter] ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 1:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-supervillainy-rampage/598166/50 "2011-10-05T01:33:46Z")
> [@Larry\_Mudd](#): > > Key in the ignition? It’s all Anka, all the time - and at the bone-rattling, bowel-emptying volume that triggered the trap in the first place. > > [maniacal laughter] Wuss. Add some C-4 to that Mother, Darwinize those troublemakers. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 1:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-supervillainy-rampage/598166/51 "2011-10-05T01:48:15Z")
> [@Larry\_Mudd](#): > > I would use the vast reserves of accumulated cash from stealing all the gold out of Fort Knox and the knickers out of Emma Stone’s laundry hamper :: googles to make sure I know who I’m talking about :: Um…isn’t she like 12? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 1:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-supervillainy-rampage/598166/52 "2011-10-05T01:54:13Z")
I was thinking Emma Peel. ---
**Author:** ![Ranchoth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranchoth/32/1066_2.png) [@Ranchoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranchoth)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 2:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-supervillainy-rampage/598166/53 "2011-10-05T02:29:21Z")
> [@Mr.Excellent](#): > > And when the Scorpion Men rebel? As they will, you know - and God knows they’ll have good reason. I don’t care if they’re soulless, slavering monstrosities - I wouldn’t inflict proximity to a Prop 8 supporter on any vertebrate. The solution depends entirely on how many Scorpion Men will be required for the plan, and how much of California is going to be left depopulated (and thus available for Scorpion Man resettlement) afterward. (Also, how well Scorpion Men stand up to a California hard frost. 😃 ) ---
**Author:** ![Dread\_Pirate\_Jimbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dread_pirate_jimbo/32/3897_2.png) [@Dread\_Pirate\_Jimbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dread_Pirate_Jimbo)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 1:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-supervillainy-rampage/598166/54 "2011-10-05T13:20:50Z")
> [@Silver Tyger Girl](#): > > Wrong. Black corduroys, yellow dress shirt, yellow, blue, and beige plaid vest. > > Do your worst **Jimbo**. I have powers beyond your comprehension. 😉 Doesn’t sound like there’s any paisley there. You are safe. For now… ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 1:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-supervillainy-rampage/598166/55 "2011-10-05T13:29:56Z")
Relevant [xkcd](http://xkcd.com/792/). ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-supervillainy-rampage/598166/56 "2011-10-05T15:41:55Z")
Wooden ice cream spoons. I freak out. I cannot do anything else while one is being used. I’ve been known to get up and get the user a real spoon. ---
**Author:** ![Dread\_Pirate\_Jimbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dread_pirate_jimbo/32/3897_2.png) [@Dread\_Pirate\_Jimbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dread_Pirate_Jimbo)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-supervillainy-rampage/598166/57 "2011-10-05T16:45:38Z")
> [@Annie-Xmas](#): > > Wooden ice cream spoons. I freak out. I cannot do anything else while one is being used. I’ve been known to get up and get the user a real spoon. I’m sorry, but I don’t see how this amounts to a supervillainy rampage, unless you’re disebowelling the wooden spoon users with real spoons. You must therefore be destroyed. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-supervillainy-rampage/598166/58 "2011-10-05T17:22:39Z")
> [@Dread\_Pirate\_Jimbo](#): > > You must therefore be destroyed. 🙂 Have you ever thought of a hobby? Sailing, stamp collecting, rapine and pillaging? 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Dread\_Pirate\_Jimbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dread_pirate_jimbo/32/3897_2.png) [@Dread\_Pirate\_Jimbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dread_Pirate_Jimbo)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-supervillainy-rampage/598166/59 "2011-10-05T17:27:04Z")
> [@carnivorousplant](#): > > Have you ever thought of a hobby? > Sailing, stamp collecting, rapine and pillaging? > 🙂 All my hobbies involve hitting things with sticks: playing the drums, golfing, and baseball. And torture. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Silver\_Tyger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/fbc32d/32.png) [@Silver\_Tyger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silver_Tyger)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2011, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-supervillainy-rampage/598166/60 "2011-10-05T17:54:08Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > How many times must I tell you to STOP SAYING THINGS LIKE THAT? :mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad::mad: > > Anyway…I’m sending a dozen Cheetara and Tygra clones to get you out of the mess you just got yourself into to. Oh, good, my chimera beasts were hungry. I assure you, Skaldy, I’m more than capable of taking care of myself (and it usually involves fire, because fire fixes everything.) > [@Dread\_Pirate\_Jimbo](#): > > Doesn’t sound like there’s any paisley there. You are safe. For now… I _almost_ put on a paisley tie last night and posted a picture, but unfortunately I’m having computer trouble. _grumble_ People who do not turn on their lights - and not just the parking lights - when it’s raining shall be drowned. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-supervillainy-rampage/598166.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whats-your-supervillainy-rampage/598166.md?page=4)