# When I opened up Great Debates just now, I could tell... **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 28, 2003, 6:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-i-opened-up-great-debates-just-now-i-could-tell/151425 "2003-01-28T06:06:17Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![RexDart](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b77776/32.png) [@RexDart](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RexDart)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2003, 6:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-i-opened-up-great-debates-just-now-i-could-tell/151425/1 "2003-01-28T06:06:17Z")
Hmm…all the thread titles are about one word per line and the username and last post columns are very wide…scrolling down…scrolling down…there it is. Yes, it’s our old nemesis **The Vorlon Ambassador’s Aide** , committing the double foul of having started a thread and being the last poster on that thread. Petty stupid complaint? Depends on your browser, but probably. But it grows on you. Why does one guy have so much power over the way the board visibly appears on my screen? Why is somebody allowed this power just to tickle his fancy by allowing him a lengthy and stupid username? Why can’t he just be the Vorlon Ambassador? Does humility force him to concede that he’s really only up to being an aide to said ambassador? If the aide was much cooler than the ambassador, I imagine he would have become ambassador himself, so surely the aide is in fact a step down. And was there only ever _one_ Vorlon Ambassador, or merely one aide throughout the annals of time? It’s pretty presumptuous to call him _The_ Vorlon Ambassador’s Aide, as if to diminish the roles of all previous and subsequent Vorlon Ambassadors and/or their aides. So not only does this username represent a slight to possibly dozens of Vorlon functionaries, it singlehandedly claims the power to alter table dimensions displayed in HTML browsers. What a shocking abuse of privilege. ---
**Author:** ![samarm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/4da419/32.png) [@samarm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/samarm)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2003, 6:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-i-opened-up-great-debates-just-now-i-could-tell/151425/2 "2003-01-28T06:13:33Z")
I’m not sure which one is worse, him or: **Octavia Smythe-Bunion I. Esq.** 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Polycarp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/82dd89/32.png) [@Polycarp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polycarp)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2003, 6:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-i-opened-up-great-debates-just-now-i-could-tell/151425/3 "2003-01-28T06:32:59Z")
It could be worse: she could be, **Octavia Smythe-Bunion I. Esq., Vorlon Ambassador Extraordinary and Minister Plenipotentiary**. (After all, we need someone for **TVAI** to be the Aide to!) 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![GIGObuster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gigobuster/32/421_2.png) [@GIGObuster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GIGObuster)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2003, 6:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-i-opened-up-great-debates-just-now-i-could-tell/151425/4 "2003-01-28T06:40:00Z")
Somebody should report him to Ambassador Kosh! ---
**Author:** ![The\_Clawman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e47c2d/32.png) [@The\_Clawman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Clawman)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2003, 11:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-i-opened-up-great-debates-just-now-i-could-tell/151425/5 "2003-01-28T11:15:55Z")
Watch out or you may incur the “Wrath of the Swarm”! If it’s the same guy who posts at Snopes anyways. ---
**Author:** ![Liberal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2003, 11:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-i-opened-up-great-debates-just-now-i-could-tell/151425/6 "2003-01-28T11:45:35Z")
Oh, he will so love this thread! It’s like when Ms. Washington mentioned the name of Mr. Ratz. ---
**Author:** ![E-Sabbath](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e19adc/32.png) [@E-Sabbath](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/E-Sabbath)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2003, 11:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-i-opened-up-great-debates-just-now-i-could-tell/151425/7 "2003-01-28T11:50:22Z")
At least it’s not a Narn Bat Squad. ---
**Author:** ![Eva\_Luna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e495f1/32.png) [@Eva\_Luna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eva_Luna)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2003, 1:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-i-opened-up-great-debates-just-now-i-could-tell/151425/8 "2003-01-30T01:56:52Z")
If they got married, would they hyphenate? ---
**Author:** ![Osbie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/cdc98d/32.png) [@Osbie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Osbie)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2003, 5:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-i-opened-up-great-debates-just-now-i-could-tell/151425/9 "2003-01-30T05:10:16Z")
_sigh!_ If I had been told, when I was signing up for this board, that even though there is no apparent restriction on the number of characters in ones name, it would, nevertheless, behoove me to keep it short & sweet, I would have. Just be happy that I didn’t go with **Ergo the Magnificent: Short in Stature, Tall in Power, Narrow of Purpose, and Wide of Vision**. Thanks for the nomination, **Polycarp**. As Vorlon Ambassador Extraordinary and Minister Plenipotentiary I promise to lower taxes, increase spending, create world peace, build a better mousetrap, designate chocolate as a vital food group, protect our precious bodily fluids and, um, stuff. You may now bring your babies forward for me to smooch. Also, would anyone know of a field where I might have a picture taken of me kneeling down and holding some soil in my hand while I look deeply concerned about farm issues? I am also seeking a photo op where I get to wear a hard hat and consult some blueprints. **Eva** , for constitutional reasons, the Vorlon Ambassador Extraordinary and Minister Plenipotentiary and the Vorlon Ambassador’s Aide cannot marry. It goes back to the incident of 1473 in which the Ambassador and the Aide did marry and there was a sudden shortage of consonants throughout the land. (Vorlons are quite fond of long names.) At any rate, in the interest of good relations, I will shorten my name - assuming this is even possible. It’s just as well. If I ever went to a Dopefest, I’d hate to have to cram **Octavia Smythe-Bunion I. Esq.** onto one of those HELLO! stickers. ---
**Author:** ![Polycarp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/82dd89/32.png) [@Polycarp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polycarp)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2003, 5:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-i-opened-up-great-debates-just-now-i-could-tell/151425/10 "2003-01-30T05:44:52Z")
> [@](#): > > At any rate, in the interest of good relations, I will shorten my name - assuming this is even possible. Should you so choose ( ::: ignores chants of **RexDart** and chorus of Dopers: “Choose! Choose! Choose! Choose!” ::: ) you can e-mail **TubaDiva** and request a name change. (I _think_ any Admin. can handle it, but it’s been traditionally **TD** who does that particular task – if they want us to be aware of a change in that, hopefully one will post to that effect here.) ---
**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2003, 9:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-i-opened-up-great-debates-just-now-i-could-tell/151425/11 "2003-01-30T09:27:39Z")
Just remember that after you get your name changed and post information about it in MPSIMS, most will not remember the change and will not recognize you. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![SPOOFE](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c5a1d2/32.png) [@SPOOFE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SPOOFE)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2003, 11:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-i-opened-up-great-debates-just-now-i-could-tell/151425/12 "2003-01-30T11:00:30Z")
Just get a better monitor. 1600x1200 resolution is SO nice…! ---
**Author:** ![samarm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/4da419/32.png) [@samarm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/samarm)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2003, 11:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-i-opened-up-great-debates-just-now-i-could-tell/151425/13 "2003-01-30T11:02:41Z")
I only have 19 inches. I feel so inadequate. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Neurotik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/91b2a8/32.png) [@Neurotik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Neurotik)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2003, 12:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-i-opened-up-great-debates-just-now-i-could-tell/151425/14 "2003-01-30T12:24:43Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by samarm \* > \*\*I only have 19 inches. I feel so inadequate. ☹ \*\* :eek: Inadequate?? I thought I was pretty big with 8. ---
**Author:** ![singular1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ba9def/32.png) [@singular1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/singular1)\ **Post date:** [January 30, 2003, 1:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-i-opened-up-great-debates-just-now-i-could-tell/151425/15 "2003-01-30T13:33:31Z")
HA! 23" here! I never thought I’d be bragging about having a big one… ---
**Author:** ![Daikona](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/8baadc/32.png) [@Daikona](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Daikona)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2003, 4:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-i-opened-up-great-debates-just-now-i-could-tell/151425/16 "2003-01-31T04:05:03Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by The Clawman \* > \*\*If it’s the same guy who posts at Snopes anyways. \*\* I seem to remember him saying over there that he’d been over here. Is he as much of an ass here? ---
**Author:** ![whiterabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/cab0a1/32.png) [@whiterabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/whiterabbit)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2003, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-i-opened-up-great-debates-just-now-i-could-tell/151425/17 "2003-01-31T04:12:17Z")
I’m trying to figure out why the Vorlon Ambassador would NEED an aide. ---
**Author:** ![Protesilaus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/82dd89/32.png) [@Protesilaus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Protesilaus)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2003, 5:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-i-opened-up-great-debates-just-now-i-could-tell/151425/18 "2003-01-31T05:02:34Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by SPOOFE \* > \*\*Just get a better monitor. 1600x1200 resolution is SO nice…! \*\* Even 1024x768 will get rid of the problem. I just went to GD, and it looks fine to me. ---
**Author:** ![Desmostylus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/c57346/32.png) [@Desmostylus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Desmostylus)\ **Post date:** [February 1, 2003, 1:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-i-opened-up-great-debates-just-now-i-could-tell/151425/19 "2003-02-01T13:39:34Z")
There’s a plague of them. A new poster called **IfYouDidWouldI?IfIDidWouldYou?** has just arrived in GQ. Plus, there’s **Mr Rrrrr Fffff Rrrrfffrrrfff** and **Pretend My Name Is Witty**. What the fuck is going on? I mean, if that’s the new style, can I respectfully ask one of the mods to edit my user name and change it to the entire text of “The Sirens of Titan”? ---
**Author:** ![pretend\_my\_name\_is\_witty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/b9e5f3/32.png) [@pretend\_my\_name\_is\_witty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pretend_my_name_is_witty)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2003, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-i-opened-up-great-debates-just-now-i-could-tell/151425/20 "2003-02-23T01:51:30Z")
Hey, I’m sorry if my name has caused any inconvenience for you guys. Actually, I’m not sorry, but it makes me sound like a better person if i say so. Seriously, change your resolution. I kinda re-opened this thread after doing a vanity search, and thought I’d respond since this is the closest I’ve come to a real pitting. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-i-opened-up-great-debates-just-now-i-could-tell/151425.md?page=2)