I’ve had this happen a few times in unforgivable circumstances. It is terribly embarrassing. I think part of the reason you can’t stop laughing is because you know you really should stop laughing – and that makes it worse.
There were 2 times when it happened during court during proceedings. Judge had to call a recess in each instance. Fortunately, the judge was also having trouble to keep from laughing, so the recesses weren’t just down to my bad behavior.
There was also the time I inadvertently attended an Evensong service in Bath. We’d been fortunate in Exeter to be in the cathedral during their Anglican Evensong choir practice. It was incredibly beautiful and moving, and we were free to roam about at our leisure while listening. We so enjoyed the music that we thought we’d try again in Bath. Oops. Not a practice. A full-on service. A Catholic service.
I’m no church-goer, and the Catholic calisthenics (sit, kneel, stand, sit, repeat) are a mystery to me. We tried to follow along best we could, but there came a moment when everyone else was sitting and we were conspicuously still standing. Three butts hit the pew in hasty unison.
And that was it. The giggles commenced. Would not stop. Try as we might, chuckling, snorting and even a quiet, strangled cry emitted from our location. The person leading the service scowled at us in a furious manner. It did no good.
We fled the venue in the first instant we could. The natives were more grateful than we were, I suspect.
That is a most excellent word and now I will be saying it to myself and chuckling right along.
I just had the uncontrollable laughing thing a few weeks ago when talking to a friend. We talk about food a lot, and I told her we were having shakshuka for dinner (for anyone not familiar with that dish, it is eggs poached in a tomato-based sauce).
This brought up her dislike of plain eggs. She doesn’t like the taste or smell of them and is grossed out when her husband makes himself fried eggs for breakfast.
Her: “To me, it’s like eating a fart. He’s eating farts for breakfast and you’re having farts for dinner!”
I could not stop laughing. I ended up laying my head down on the table. And every time I make shakshuka I know I will remember this and start laughing all over again.
I was struck by an episode of helpless laughter that I have never forgotten the first time I saw This Is Spinal Tap. It’s a hilarious movie, but the scene that just about did me in was when the 6" high Stonehenge replica was lowered onto the stage.
I think I’ll watch the chicken nuggers video again now.
There was a stretch of like 5 or 6 days where I was watching this 10 times a night and belly laughing every time. That was a few weeks ago and it’s still a side splitter.
We took a group of high school kids on a mission trip right after Hurricane Katrina to rebuild flood-damaged houses. Stayed Saturday night in a church basement in less-than-urban Tennessee. We felt obligated to attend their service the next morning… where the pastor made a big deal of their cornholing.
None of us yanks had heard the term used for anything G-rated. We could NOT stop laughing (silently, but the back pew we were in was shaking).
It didn’t help that the old men in the church were called up to the pulpit to persuade people: “Ah jes’ don’ see whyyy we cain’t git more people cornholin’. It’s good clean fun, an’ you can even do it with a beer in yer other haind.”
Back in college I worked at a pizza place that had a salad bar. One of the guys who worked day shift (where they did a lot of prep work between lunch and dinner) would put jokey labels on the salad bar tubs. For eggs he would put something like “solid chicken farts” or “smelly things from chicken butts”. He had to stop doing it when a customer saw one and complained to the manager.
(And even now, 40 years later, I’m getting the giggles typing “solid chicken farts”!)
I played Mae Peterson, the villain in Bye, Bye, Birdie, in our high school’s production. At one point in the show, Conrad Birdie dresses up as my character. During the dress rehearsal when I saw him for the first time this way, I laughed so hard I almost fell down, and took the rest of the cast with me.
Albert Brooks has always been able to completely break me up. I think it’s because he commits so completely, whether it’s his standup in the old days or his movies. The man looks like he’s never “broken” while delivering a funny line in his life.
He made a movie called “Looking For Comedy In the Muslim World” a while ago in which he travels to various countries trying to discover what they find amusing. In India he gives a stage performance, and is stymied by the lack of support he gets from the sullen crew at the performing space. When told there’s no backstage area he asks for a tent where he can change clothes and be alone before the show. This is met with silent incredulity, but later we see they have gotten him his tent…
A Native American tepee.
It struck me all at once: Brooks sitting forlornly in his ridiculous stage wardrobe, in a tepee, in India. Where did they even get a tepee in India?! And did they do this intentionally as a f*%$ you to Brooks? I was laughing so hard I had to stop the DVD.
Not a great movie otherwise, but that moment just killed me. However, I have no doubt most people wouldn’t have had the same reaction.
I once dated a guy whose mother was susceptible to the power of suggestion to an inordinate degree. He and his brother were aware of this quality in their mom and had fun with it.
So one day they were waiting in a drive-thru line at a Taco Bell.
They pulled up to the speaker phone and Mom asked her sons, “What would you like me to order for you?”
The boys, in unison, “We want chicken vaginas!”
And Mom ordered… yes. Yes, she did.
It took awhile to clarify that she meant chicken fajitas.
To this day, I slow down before ordering chicken fajitas.
