# When "Sorry" Doesn't Do It **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 6, 2012, 8:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-sorry-doesnt-do-it/608606 "2012-01-06T08:45:50Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 16\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Darth\_Panda](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ee7513/32.png) [@Darth\_Panda](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darth_Panda)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2012, 3:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-sorry-doesnt-do-it/608606/41 "2012-01-08T03:19:46Z")
I prefer Hungry, Hungry Hippos. ---
**Author:** ![Dave\_Hartwick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/7feea3/32.png) [@Dave\_Hartwick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dave_Hartwick)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2012, 3:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-sorry-doesnt-do-it/608606/42 "2012-01-08T03:49:05Z")
Australia has an unofficial holiday called National Sorry Day that I bet you wouldn’t like. ---
**Author:** ![Argent\_Towers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e8c25b/32.png) [@Argent\_Towers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Argent_Towers)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2012, 3:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-sorry-doesnt-do-it/608606/43 "2012-01-08T03:51:36Z")
I truly believe that the majority of time people say “sorry” - maybe even 90% of the time - they don’t really mean it. ---
**Author:** ![brittekland](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/aeb1de/32.png) [@brittekland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brittekland)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2012, 3:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-sorry-doesnt-do-it/608606/44 "2012-01-08T03:58:08Z")
> [@Dave\_Hartwick](#): > > Australia has an unofficial holiday called National Sorry Day that I bet you wouldn’t like. Sorry Day doubles as Forgive Day or do they have a separate holiday for forgiving? ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2012, 4:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-sorry-doesnt-do-it/608606/45 "2012-01-08T04:03:57Z")
> [@brittekland](#): > > Conversely, yes, what else could one do after spilling the milk though? Take [Refuge In Audacity.](http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/RefugeInAudacity) ---
**Author:** ![Dave\_Hartwick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/7feea3/32.png) [@Dave\_Hartwick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dave_Hartwick)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2012, 5:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-sorry-doesnt-do-it/608606/46 "2012-01-08T05:05:12Z")
> [@brittekland](#): > > Sorry Day doubles as Forgive Day or do they have a separate holiday for forgiving? Considering that the apology is for the mistreatment Aborigines suffered, it would be audacious to presume forgiveness. I do like the idea of a “Forgive Me” day. ---
**Author:** ![brittekland](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/aeb1de/32.png) [@brittekland](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brittekland)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2012, 5:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-sorry-doesnt-do-it/608606/47 "2012-01-08T05:37:37Z")
> [@Dave\_Hartwick](#): > > Considering that the apology is for the mistreatment Aborigines suffered, it would be audacious to presume forgiveness. Perhaps we ought to have one or two as well then. ---
**Author:** ![njtt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ecd19e/32.png) [@njtt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/njtt)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2012, 6:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-sorry-doesnt-do-it/608606/48 "2012-01-08T06:14:52Z")
> [@Chicagojeff](#): > > Maybe the mob that burned Ryan White’s house down ([Ryan White - Wikipedia](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ryan_White)) Not knowing what this was about, I clicked your link. It appears Mr White suffered some pretty shitty treatment, but I can find no hint in that Wikipedia entry that he ever had his house burned down. Either you or Wikipedia should say “sorry.” ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2012, 6:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-sorry-doesnt-do-it/608606/49 "2012-01-08T06:29:45Z")
There is sorry on a personal level, and everyone agrees there are occasions when they are warranted. But – a _nation_ being sorry for a policy? This is a whole different kettle of fish, and totally unacceptable in certain conservative circles in America. There has been barrages of criticism directed at President Obama for anything he says that might possibly be construed as an apology for anything America has ever done. And it’s not exclusive to his actions. There were many objections to the US apologizing to the citizens of Japanese ancestry who were interned during WWII, for instance. I find the idea that Americans should never apologize for official actions and policies to be both inexplicable and fascinating. ---
**Author:** ![Rigamarole](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/77aa72/32.png) [@Rigamarole](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rigamarole)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2012, 6:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-sorry-doesnt-do-it/608606/50 "2012-01-08T06:52:56Z")
“I’m really sorry I brutally raped, tortured, and murdered your entire family. Was just having one of those days, ya know?” ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2012, 9:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-sorry-doesnt-do-it/608606/51 "2012-01-08T09:04:15Z")
> [@phouka](#): > > When I called the man who gave me herpes to say “you need to go get tested for this, because you’re the only one who could have given it to me,” his answer was a very mechanical “I’m so sorry you have to go through this.” > > While I don’t have hard evidence, I’m fairly sure he already knew he had herpes and had infected me, not exactly on purpose, but out of a level of denial combined with some sort of displaced vengeance against the person who’d given it to him. > > So, saying “I’m so sorry you have to go through this,” didn’t really cut it. I think that I’d have to start making some PSAs to the people that he knows. Something on the order of “If you have sex with this guy, make sure he wears a condom, he gave me herpes and he doesn’t really seem to be sorry about it”. But that’s just me and my vindictive streak. ---
**Author:** ![Gary\_Kumquat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/4491bb/32.png) [@Gary\_Kumquat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gary_Kumquat)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2012, 9:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-sorry-doesnt-do-it/608606/52 "2012-01-08T09:17:51Z")
> [@njtt](#): > > Not knowing what this was about, I clicked your link. > > It appears Mr White suffered some pretty shitty treatment, but I can find no hint in that Wikipedia entry that he ever had his house burned down. > > Either you or Wikipedia should say “sorry.” I’m guessing he’s conflated that with the Ray brothers: > **[Ray brothers](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ray_brothers)** > > Richard Duane "Ricky" Ray (January 28, 1977 – December 13, 1992), Robert David Ray (January 27, 1978 – October 20, 2000), and Randy Devone Ray (June 3, 1979 – May 18, 2023) were three hemophiliac brothers who were diagnosed with HIV in 1986 due to HIV-infected infusions of Factor VIII. > Ricky, Robert, and Randy were hemophiliacs who contracted HIV from infusions of Factor VIII when they were less than 8 years old. Born to Arcadia, Florida, natives Louise and Clifford Ray, the family was exiled fr... ---
**Author:** ![Cicero](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cicero/32/3594_2.png) [@Cicero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cicero)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2012, 11:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-sorry-doesnt-do-it/608606/53 "2012-01-08T11:26:37Z")
> [@Dave\_Hartwick](#): > > Australia has an unofficial holiday called National Sorry Day that I bet you wouldn’t like. Unofficial holiday? I bet the majority of Australians wouldn’t know when it was and certainly don’t take it as a holiday. ---
**Author:** ![Dave\_Hartwick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/7feea3/32.png) [@Dave\_Hartwick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dave_Hartwick)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2012, 1:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-sorry-doesnt-do-it/608606/54 "2012-01-08T13:44:14Z")
> [@Cicero](#): > > Unofficial holiday? I bet the majority of Australians wouldn’t know when it was and certainly don’t take it as a holiday. I agree. “Unofficial holiday” is what Wikipedia calls it. The entry is about 3 sentences long. I just remembered hearing about it somewhere when I read this thread. ---
**Author:** ![ballardfam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/8797f3/32.png) [@ballardfam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ballardfam)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2012, 2:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-sorry-doesnt-do-it/608606/55 "2012-01-09T02:30:04Z")
> [@FloatyGimpy](#): > > Do you mean something like a bad car accident and he wanted those to be his last words? Yeah, sorry. Typing too fast. Meant bad argument ---
**Author:** ![phouka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c5a1d2/32.png) [@phouka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/phouka)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2012, 5:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-sorry-doesnt-do-it/608606/56 "2012-01-09T05:45:03Z")
> [@Lynn\_Bodoni](#): > > I think that I’d have to start making some PSAs to the people that he knows. Something on the order of “If you have sex with this guy, make sure he wears a condom, he gave me herpes and he doesn’t really seem to be sorry about it”. But that’s just me and my vindictive streak. Actually, it would have to be “Do not have sex with this man. Even if you put a condom on him, it might just disappear during coitus.” (Yes, I was _that_ naive.) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-sorry-doesnt-do-it/608606.md?page=2)