# When to tell the kids we're going to Disney **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [April 4, 2011, 2:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-to-tell-the-kids-were-going-to-disney/577144 "2011-04-04T14:11:09Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2011, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-to-tell-the-kids-were-going-to-disney/577144/21 "2011-04-04T15:42:12Z")
A month before the trip. I don’t understand why you wouldn’t tell them and let them build up some excitement, and let them help plan. I would think all of those little things would add up to life lessons later on, and plus it would really make the vacation seem “longer”, including the planning. ---
**Author:** ![Flutterby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Flutterby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Flutterby)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2011, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-to-tell-the-kids-were-going-to-disney/577144/22 "2011-04-04T15:48:31Z")
My dad didn’t tell me (us) until two weeks before we left. It’s the sort of thing that drives me nuts, we’ll know plans and we’re going somewhere but he keeps mum the whole time, practically until we’re there. Now given this was two years ago, and we live in Canada so there was more involved than just going on a long drive (I had to book time off work, get passports for my son and myself etc so I wasn’t 10 or even 5 for that matter but it’s something he does that drives me batty). I agree with a month before or so. It is a long time for the younguns to be waiting from after school ends to October but you want to build up some anticipation. We went in October (Canadian thanksgiving) and it was gorgeous. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2011, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-to-tell-the-kids-were-going-to-disney/577144/23 "2011-04-04T15:59:11Z")
[Obligatory Jack Handey link](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V4EdJ0tb4Gw&playnext=1&list=PL39D9E5E08D19402A) ---
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2011, 4:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-to-tell-the-kids-were-going-to-disney/577144/24 "2011-04-04T16:00:54Z")
> [@Wheelz](#): > > But, I agree with **Dangerosa** and others that they should be involved in the planning (to an extent) and be allowed to learn what their experience will be like before they go. A month seems like about the right amount of time to work up a good amount of excitement and keep them engaged without stretching it out too long. A month and the good places to eat will be booked. There may be NOTHING available for character meals. Most of the Epcot restaurants will be booked, and most of the MK restaurants as well (there aren’t many). Anything that requires reservations will be dicey. So if you are going to wait until a month out so the kids can be involved in “planning” you might as well do all the planning and spring it on them the morning you leave. Unless reservations aren’t going to be a component of your trip and you are going to stick to fast food and what you can get on short notice. ---
**Author:** ![TruCelt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trucelt/32/523_2.png) [@TruCelt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TruCelt)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2011, 4:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-to-tell-the-kids-were-going-to-disney/577144/25 "2011-04-04T16:05:43Z")
Seriously? You’re not going to give them the ultimate pleasure of telling all their school friends they’ve got a Disney trip coming? Give them time on the web to pull up the Bing map and get familiar with the hotel, the park, etc? Let them spend the summer making elaborate maps and priority lists on what to see, in what order, and what to eat on the way? C’mon! Tell 'em now, now, NOW! ! ! ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2011, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-to-tell-the-kids-were-going-to-disney/577144/26 "2011-04-04T16:10:21Z")
> [@Dangerosa](#): > > A month and the good places to eat will be booked. There may be NOTHING available for character meals. Most of the Epcot restaurants will be booked, and most of the MK restaurants as well (there aren’t many). Anything that requires reservations will be dicey. > > So if you are going to wait until a month out so the kids can be involved in “planning” you might as well do all the planning and spring it on them the morning you leave. Unless reservations aren’t going to be a component of your trip and you are going to stick to fast food and what you can get on short notice. In this case I should tell them now. I mean, the kids are 6, 8, and 10, right? I think it would be a marvelous learning experience for all of them to budget, and plan, and balance out their time, and schedule. It is stuff they will be doing all of their lives. I find that parents who don’t do this stuff with their kids end up with kids who have no idea how to balance a dollar. ---
**Author:** ![TruCelt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trucelt/32/523_2.png) [@TruCelt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TruCelt)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2011, 4:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-to-tell-the-kids-were-going-to-disney/577144/27 "2011-04-04T16:11:45Z")
> [@don\_t\_ask](#): > > My epiphany was Taronga Park Zoo. You tell the kids you are going 3 weeks in advance and on the day it is pouring rain or over 100 degrees (or both in Sydney) so you are an asshole when you decide not to go. > > Don’t mention it at all and on the day tell the kids, “let’s go to the zoo!” Wow, aren’t you the fun spontaneous dad. Don’t ask don’t tell? 😃 LOL! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2011, 4:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-to-tell-the-kids-were-going-to-disney/577144/28 "2011-04-04T16:12:27Z")
BTW, this is one of those “you know your kids” things - if your kids are go with the flow sorts of kids, surprises work great. We did a surprise trip to Mexico one year - wake them up and tell them “we are going to Mexico today!” It was a lot of fun. We took friends years ago. She didn’t prep her kids. She didn’t surprise them, but they didn’t have any reference either. They hadn’t looked at planners or spent time on the internet looking at rides. For a lot of kids this would have been fine - its Disney! For her kids - they are both on the autism spectrum - both of them take a LOT to get used to something. It was a miserable trip, since she assumed they’d do much more than they were comfortable doing. Her kids were overwhelmed within four hours and spent five days not coping. Had she spent more time with them telling them what to expect, watching YouTube videos of attractions so that to both her and them it wasn’t a “what’s in here!” and having them help plan, I think it would have gone more smoothly. Probably not perfect, her kids were going to be overwhelmed, but they wouldn’t have crashed as badly as they did. My sister has one that - although not on the autism spectrum - just doesn’t LIKE surprises. His first trip to Disney was a lot of standing OUTSIDE attractions figuring out if he wanted to go in. His second trip he went in. Again, had she done a lot of prep work with him on what to expect, they’d have had a trip where they spent less time looking at the OUTSIDE of rides. I have the opposite issue - my kids have been to Disney six times. So if I surprised them with a trip, and didn’t make the “right” dinner reservations - I’d get “can’t we eat HERE? Why didn’t we make reservations to \_\_\_\_\_\_\_?” They KNOW too much, so I have to let them plan. We start talking a year in advance. I can’t surprise them, they have to help plan or we wouldn’t manage to fit in their priorities. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2011, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-to-tell-the-kids-were-going-to-disney/577144/29 "2011-04-04T16:19:33Z")
> [@Dangerosa](#): > > A month and the good places to eat will be booked. There may be NOTHING available for character meals. Most of the Epcot restaurants will be booked, and most of the MK restaurants as well (there aren’t many). Anything that requires reservations will be dicey. In October you can walk into any restaurant at Epcot at almost any time and get a table. ---
**Author:** ![Wheelz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wheelz/32/5718_2.png) [@Wheelz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wheelz)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2011, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-to-tell-the-kids-were-going-to-disney/577144/30 "2011-04-04T16:36:02Z")
> [@Dangerosa](#): > > A month and the good places to eat will be booked. There may be NOTHING available for character meals. Most of the Epcot restaurants will be booked, and most of the MK restaurants as well (there aren’t many). Anything that requires reservations will be dicey. Excellent point. Whenever you decide to tell the girls the good news, DO NOT wait to make dining reservations. Letting them choose what character meal(s) they want is a good argument for telling them early, but if you tell them later, book a couple of character meals (and other dinners) NOW. The Princess lunch at Akershus in Epcot would be a great choice for little girls. > [@Anaamika](#): > > I mean, the kids are 6, 8, and 10, right? I think it would be a marvelous learning experience for all of them to budget, and plan, and balance out their time, and schedule. It is stuff they will be doing all of their lives. I find that parents who don’t do this stuff with their kids end up with kids who have no idea how to balance a dollar. Bah. It’s a Disney vacation, it’s not school. Let them be kids for this one. > [@Dangerosa](#): > > BTW, this is one of those “you know your kids” things Yep. Ultimately I think you just need to go with your gut. ---
**Author:** ![muldoonthief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muldoonthief/32/3188_2.png) [@muldoonthief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/muldoonthief)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2011, 4:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-to-tell-the-kids-were-going-to-disney/577144/31 "2011-04-04T16:37:34Z")
To answer some questions: Short of a death, serious illness, or natural disaster, this trip is going to happen. So there won’t be any “Sorry kids, it’s raining today, we can’t go to Disney.” None of my kids care about where they eat, as long as it contains hot dogs and/or chicken nuggets. Sit down meals in the parks appear to cost a fortune, so we’ll do one, maybe 2 of those. My wife and I have pretty much nailed those down already. We’ll be staying off-Disney, so will probably do a bunch of meals there. For in-park, we’ll be doing mostly counter service. All other planning - rides, shows, fireworks - is non-reservation. They can get involved in that when we’re a lot closer to the date (if we go with my 3 month plan, and not my wife’s 1 week). Based on several recommendations, we’re using the Unofficial Guide & [touringplans.com](http://touringplans.com). We’ll also be going to Universal for 2 days. From the day we tell them to wheels down in Orlando, I expect a non-stop stream of “How much longer?” If we tell them today, the youngest will probably gnaw a hole in the wall by July in frustration, and the 8 year old will have her hair fall out from stress. **RNATB** , is that true during the Food & Wine event as well? That would help out a lot actually. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2011, 4:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-to-tell-the-kids-were-going-to-disney/577144/32 "2011-04-04T16:40:34Z")
> [@Wheelz](#): > > Bah. It’s a Disney vacation, it’s not school. Let them be kids for this one. ☹ but I would have loved to help my parents plan, instead of just having things sprung on me… ---
**Author:** ![hogarth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hogarth/32/1773_2.png) [@hogarth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hogarth)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2011, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-to-tell-the-kids-were-going-to-disney/577144/33 "2011-04-04T16:46:19Z")
I’d say a month is reasonable. But then again, I have always disliked surprises. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2011, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-to-tell-the-kids-were-going-to-disney/577144/34 "2011-04-04T16:49:18Z")
> [@muldoonthief](#): > > **RNATB** , is that true during the Food & Wine event as well? That would help out a lot actually. Yep. That always falls during October. I should specify that it’s not true on weekends, when us locals like to go drinking around the world. It also might not be true of character events, which I’ve never bothered with (not having kids). ---
**Author:** ![perfectparanoia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a5b964/32.png) [@perfectparanoia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/perfectparanoia)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2011, 4:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-to-tell-the-kids-were-going-to-disney/577144/35 "2011-04-04T16:50:26Z")
Another thing to consider is not just the planning but what happens to kids when they are out of their element. Disney World is an incredibly exciting place (for kids and grownups). There is a big chance that your children will lose their ability to behave if you don’t prep them accordingly. When we took our kids for the first time last year (they were 5 and 6, FWIW), we sat down with a list of dos and donts (and they got to add some of their own) and what the result of misbehaving would be (first offence, time out, second, miss the next ride or attraction, third, back to the hotel). They did get overexcited a few times and landed a time out (you would be amazed at the little corners in the World where you can timeout your kid) but once they remembered our agreement, they got back on track. If this is their first time going, it can be overwhelming and a reminder that they need to remember to behave just like they do at home goes a long way. We set this up one week, reviewed it the next, printed and signed it the next and reviewed it the night before and at the airport the day we left. (So, I said you should tell them at least a month in advance.) We told our kids while we were there that we would be coming back next year (since we are Disney Vacation Club members from before they came along and have gone every year since 2005). ---
**Author:** ![kushiel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/bbce88/32.png) [@kushiel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kushiel)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2011, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-to-tell-the-kids-were-going-to-disney/577144/36 "2011-04-04T16:59:46Z")
Well, Mom told me probably around a month before. Unfortunately, she was going for work, so I didn’t get to go. Mom went to Disney World and all I got was this lousy Minnie Barbie. ---
**Author:** ![Cheesesteak](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cheesesteak/32/3694_2.png) [@Cheesesteak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cheesesteak)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2011, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-to-tell-the-kids-were-going-to-disney/577144/37 "2011-04-04T17:13:44Z")
Normally, I’d say right away, but if the kids can’t handle this sort of time frame, you’d know better than me. I think after school is out, so they know exactly what summer vacation will or won’t be. ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2011, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-to-tell-the-kids-were-going-to-disney/577144/38 "2011-04-04T17:15:55Z")
> [@muldoonthief](#): > > From the day we tell them to wheels down in Orlando, I expect a non-stop stream of “How much longer?” I’d expect even the 6 year old to be able to make sense of a calendar. > [@](#): > > If we tell them today, the youngest will probably gnaw a hole in the wall by July in frustration, and the 8 year old will have her hair fall out from stress. Ah, special-needs children. You should have mentioned this in the OP. ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2011, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-to-tell-the-kids-were-going-to-disney/577144/39 "2011-04-04T17:18:57Z")
If the 6yo understands calendars, make a big wall-mounted countdown calendar showing however much time between then and the announcement date, and have them help you check off the days as the Big Day approaches. ---
**Author:** ![Markxxx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5daacb/32.png) [@Markxxx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Markxxx)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2011, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-to-tell-the-kids-were-going-to-disney/577144/40 "2011-04-04T17:22:57Z")
It reminds me when I was 10 year old my dad promised to take me on this great trip, just him and me. We planned it and talked about it and how much fun we’d have. It was all set Then he died. So not only was I out a father, but come six month later I was out the trip too. Just staying is all 🙂 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-to-tell-the-kids-were-going-to-disney/577144.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/when-to-tell-the-kids-were-going-to-disney/577144.md?page=3)