To answer some questions:
Short of a death, serious illness, or natural disaster, this trip is going to happen. So there won’t be any “Sorry kids, it’s raining today, we can’t go to Disney.”
None of my kids care about where they eat, as long as it contains hot dogs and/or chicken nuggets. Sit down meals in the parks appear to cost a fortune, so we’ll do one, maybe 2 of those. My wife and I have pretty much nailed those down already. We’ll be staying off-Disney, so will probably do a bunch of meals there. For in-park, we’ll be doing mostly counter service.
All other planning - rides, shows, fireworks - is non-reservation. They can get involved in that when we’re a lot closer to the date (if we go with my 3 month plan, and not my wife’s 1 week). Based on several recommendations, we’re using the Unofficial Guide & touringplans.com. We’ll also be going to Universal for 2 days.
From the day we tell them to wheels down in Orlando, I expect a non-stop stream of “How much longer?” If we tell them today, the youngest will probably gnaw a hole in the wall by July in frustration, and the 8 year old will have her hair fall out from stress.
RNATB, is that true during the Food & Wine event as well? That would help out a lot actually.