# Where are my keys? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 23, 2004, 3:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-my-keys/276221 "2004-11-23T03:02:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2004, 2:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-my-keys/276221/21 "2004-11-23T14:48:45Z")
Think…they are on top of the fridge. ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2004, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-my-keys/276221/22 "2004-11-23T14:52:08Z")
I hate to tell you this. You left them in the door when you came in. That’s what you get for coming home drunk. ---
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2004, 3:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-my-keys/276221/23 "2004-11-23T15:00:33Z")
I usually find mine in the door, in the fridge, or wedged between the couch cushions. Despite the fact that I have a little hook _right beside the door_ to hang them up on. ---
**Author:** ![Cowgirl\_Jules](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/4af34b/32.png) [@Cowgirl\_Jules](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cowgirl_Jules)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2004, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-my-keys/276221/24 "2004-11-23T16:28:05Z")
They’re in the couch. No, not in the cushions, down in the frame. Take the cushions off, and push the springs down, and cram your hand on in there. Now take it out and rub off the crumbs, because they’re not on that side. They’re on the other side. See? What did I tell you? ---
**Author:** ![Furry\_Mongoose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c57346/32.png) [@Furry\_Mongoose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Furry_Mongoose)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2004, 4:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-my-keys/276221/25 "2004-11-23T16:30:49Z")
They’re on the table! Not that table… that one _points_ Seeeee! Right in front of you! ---
**Author:** ![bittersweet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/c57346/32.png) [@bittersweet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bittersweet)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2004, 4:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-my-keys/276221/26 "2004-11-23T16:30:54Z")
> [@harmless](#): > > _Toonces the driving cat…_ “Wait! Toonces can’t drive! AAAAAHHHHH!” /car veers off side of cliff Those were some of the funniest skits on SNL. ---
**Author:** ![Kythereia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e8c25b/32.png) [@Kythereia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kythereia)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2004, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-my-keys/276221/27 "2004-11-23T16:36:01Z")
They’re in the bottom of the toilet. (_Please_ don’t ask…) ---
**Author:** ![lovelyluka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f475e1/32.png) [@lovelyluka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lovelyluka)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2004, 4:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-my-keys/276221/28 "2004-11-23T16:37:49Z")
_wonders if **Mirasawa** ever found the keys_ ---
**Author:** ![InvidiousCourgette](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/e47c2d/32.png) [@InvidiousCourgette](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/InvidiousCourgette)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2004, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-my-keys/276221/29 "2004-11-23T17:30:51Z")
They are in the freezer. I know you have checked there already. Check again. It is my golden rule. Always check the freezer twice. It never fails. Oh yes, it does. Never mind. ---
**Author:** ![Uncommon\_Sense](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Uncommon\_Sense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uncommon_Sense)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2004, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-my-keys/276221/30 "2004-11-23T17:59:07Z")
Check the wash basket, the garbage and the door lock. Also, check everywhere else if you don’t find them there. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2004, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-my-keys/276221/31 "2004-11-23T18:04:07Z")
Look behind the filing cabinet. They were on your bed and were hurled there by your blanket when you threw it aside getting out of bed. At least that’s what happened to my glasses last week, and I couldn’t find them for three days. ---
**Author:** ![klintypooh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3da27b/32.png) [@klintypooh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/klintypooh)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2004, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-my-keys/276221/32 "2004-11-23T18:07:27Z")
I have them and you can’t have them back, all your keys are belong to us :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![violacrane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/c57346/32.png) [@violacrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/violacrane)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2004, 7:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-my-keys/276221/33 "2004-11-23T19:18:35Z")
If they aren’t where anyone else has suggested then they are: under something you could have sworn you haven’t moved, fallen down from where you could have sworn you put them, in another dimension you could have sworn you’ve never visited. ---
**Author:** ![Frank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Frank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frank)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2004, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-my-keys/276221/34 "2004-11-23T19:25:43Z")
> [@Adoptamom\_II](#): > > Check your garbage can. Don’t ask me how I know That’s where I found my checkbook yesterday morning. Clearing the table for taco stuff and drinking margaritas interact in strange, strange ways. ---
**Author:** ![MissTake](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/misstake/32/3189_2.png) [@MissTake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MissTake)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2004, 7:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-my-keys/276221/35 "2004-11-23T19:33:10Z")
They’re partying in a separate dimension with the lone missing socks you thought the dryer monster ate. Check the microwave. Or the mailbox. Not that \*\*I \*\* would know. ---
**Author:** ![harmless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/2acd7d/32.png) [@harmless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/harmless)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2004, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-my-keys/276221/36 "2004-11-23T19:40:32Z")
Ok, the suspense is killing me. Where _are_ the keys? Does this have a factual answer? Did **Mirasawa** ’s free trial run out?? WE MAY NEVER KNOW! :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Mirasawa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/77aa72/32.png) [@Mirasawa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mirasawa)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2004, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-my-keys/276221/37 "2004-11-23T21:08:53Z")
Sorry I was late in getting back here. They were in the mail pile. Inside of a folded-in-half-and-stapled newsletter. The newsletter is kinda sproingy anyways so it wasn’t obvious that there was something inside, like the mail stack would usually show. But of course, not sproingy enough to think something could possibly be in there. :smack: Gives me new appreciation of the dimensions of a key set, even one that has a dangly metal skeleton Japanese good luck charm. 🙂 Sorry it turned out to be boring. ☹ It was fun to hear the odd place’s y’all have found stuff. 🙂 \_ \_ ---
**Author:** ![harmless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/2acd7d/32.png) [@harmless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/harmless)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2004, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-my-keys/276221/38 "2004-11-23T21:13:06Z")
It’s even funner to hear about places we’ve found cats. 😉 Actually, I think most of the answers given here would apply to that too. ---
**Author:** ![Cowgirl\_Jules](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/4af34b/32.png) [@Cowgirl\_Jules](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cowgirl_Jules)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2004, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-my-keys/276221/39 "2004-11-23T21:23:36Z")
That’s true, **harmless**. I HAVE found a cat in the frame of a couch. Mind you, it was a hide-a-bed and a very unhappy cat. I don’t know about finding a live cat in a freezer. But you didn’t specify _live_, did you? ---
**Author:** ![VenusProbe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/e495f1/32.png) [@VenusProbe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VenusProbe)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2004, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-my-keys/276221/40 "2004-11-23T21:55:50Z")
> [@Cowgirl Jules](#): > > That’s true, **harmless**. I HAVE found a cat in the frame of a couch. Mind you, it was a hide-a-bed and a very unhappy cat. > > I don’t know about finding a live cat in a freezer. But you didn’t specify _live_, did you? My sisters MIL found one there! her son put it there till he could figure out how to get the bones clean. Strange guy my BIL. :eek: it was a road kill he found on the way home. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-my-keys/276221.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-my-keys/276221.md?page=3)