# Where are the ordinary-looking gay men? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [May 5, 2005, 7:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-the-ordinary-looking-gay-men/302576 "2005-05-05T19:10:09Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![levdrakon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/49beb7/32.png) [@levdrakon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/levdrakon)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2005, 4:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-the-ordinary-looking-gay-men/302576/41 "2005-05-07T04:47:55Z")
Has anyone mentioned Pike Dextor (Eric Schweig) from one of my favorite movies, **Big Eden**? He was so heart-wrenchingly normal it, well… wrenched my heart. ---
**Author:** ![supervenusfreak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@supervenusfreak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/supervenusfreak)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2005, 6:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-the-ordinary-looking-gay-men/302576/42 "2005-05-07T06:02:58Z")
> [@levdrakon](#): > > Has anyone mentioned Pike Dextor (Eric Schweig) from one of my favorite movies, **Big Eden**? > > He was so heart-wrenchingly normal it, well… wrenched my heart. I love that movie! Such a sweet romantic fable. I should have thought of him as well. ---
**Author:** ![chaoticbear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f07891/32.png) [@chaoticbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chaoticbear)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2005, 6:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-the-ordinary-looking-gay-men/302576/43 "2005-05-07T06:57:50Z")
> [@supervenusfreak](#): > > Jayjay told me to check out your profile. It made me break out in belly laughs! We “ordinary looking gay guys” are really everywhere, except the media. Hell it took a spanish director to get us up on the big screen. [CLICK](http://www.mangafilms.es/cachorro/#) . Well there is that one and then James Gandofini in [The Mexican](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0236493/). WOOF! I got all excited about that movie after I saw an ad for it in the Advocate, and I was disappointed, I guess because I was hoping for a comedy, and it was dramaey. Side note: looks like you and **jayjay** have yet to pony up some pictures. I also think that it’s kind of funny, the admirers and such that we have running around that are hundreds, if not thousands of miles away. Seems to be a common SDMB problem. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![DMark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@DMark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DMark)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2005, 8:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-the-ordinary-looking-gay-men/302576/44 "2005-05-07T08:08:41Z")
> [@Sampiro](#): > > Thanks. 😉 Unfortunately you’re alone- if you don’t count offers to smuggle bank accounts out of Nigeria it hasn’t gotten an e-mail in months and months and months and months. Remember me? We met at Neverland Ranch and you showed me the secret handshake and the secret washing of hands after the secret handshake. If I were single, yours would be the only ad that would interest me an iota. I agree that the problem with your ad is location Regarding the OP and ordinary-looking Gay men in the media…I thought the two Gay guys on Will and Grace, who adopted the child and occasionally show up for a game of charades…they are pretty ordinary-looking, and if I am not mistaken, one or both are openly Gay. Unlike Will who ALWAYS makes a point of mentioning his wife and kid in every interview, lest people (shudder) think he might actually be…one of “them”. ---
**Author:** ![supervenusfreak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@supervenusfreak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/supervenusfreak)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2005, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-the-ordinary-looking-gay-men/302576/45 "2005-05-07T15:27:45Z")
> [@chaoticdonkey](#): > > I got all excited about that movie after I saw an ad for it in the Advocate, and I was disappointed, I guess because I was hoping for a comedy, and it was dramaey. > > Side note: looks like you and **jayjay** have yet to pony up some pictures. I also think that it’s kind of funny, the admirers and such that we have running around that are hundreds, if not thousands of miles away. Seems to be a common SDMB problem. 😛 LOL. I know what you mean. Seems like all of the admirers are in a faraway land sometimes. As for the other thing well…[pony one (Jayjay)](http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v404/supervenusfreak/jimnye.jpg) and [pony two (me!)](http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v404/supervenusfreak/dwightnye.jpg) . Enjoy! ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2005, 3:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-the-ordinary-looking-gay-men/302576/46 "2005-05-07T15:40:57Z")
> [@supervenusfreak](#): > > LOL. I know what you mean. Seems like all of the admirers are in a faraway land sometimes. As for the other thing well…[pony one (Jayjay)](http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v404/supervenusfreak/jimnye.jpg) and [pony two (me!)](http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v404/supervenusfreak/dwightnye.jpg) . Enjoy! Both, you’ll note, unconscionably ordinary-looking… ---
**Author:** ![chaoticbear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f07891/32.png) [@chaoticbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chaoticbear)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2005, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-the-ordinary-looking-gay-men/302576/47 "2005-05-07T16:49:33Z")
Do you two know each other? I just noticed the locations. ---
**Author:** ![ouryL](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ouryl/32/6067_2.png) [@ouryL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ouryL)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2005, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-the-ordinary-looking-gay-men/302576/48 "2005-05-07T17:44:55Z")
> [@jayjay](#): > > Me, too, but then I go for the schlubs. I like a man with a little body fat, thank you. And facial hair. And glasses. Kee-YOOT! 😛 More cushion, for the pushin’ :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2005, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-the-ordinary-looking-gay-men/302576/49 "2005-05-07T18:10:40Z")
> [@chaoticdonkey](#): > > Do you two know each other? I just noticed the locations. We sleep together every night, so yeah. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![supervenusfreak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@supervenusfreak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/supervenusfreak)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2005, 1:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-the-ordinary-looking-gay-men/302576/50 "2005-05-08T01:04:38Z")
> [@jayjay](#): > > Both, you’ll note, unconscionably ordinary-looking… Speak for yourself! ;0P ---
**Author:** ![psychobunny](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/54ee81/32.png) [@psychobunny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/psychobunny)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2005, 3:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-the-ordinary-looking-gay-men/302576/51 "2005-05-08T03:12:42Z")
**Sampiro** , I love your profile. If only I was gay…and male…or you were straight…Are you sure you’re gay? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Dunderman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecb155/32.png) [@Dunderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dunderman)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2005, 6:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-the-ordinary-looking-gay-men/302576/52 "2005-05-08T06:46:00Z")
> [@Licentious Ectomorph](#): > > FWIW, Will does nothing for me either. Well, that’s one thing, but it’s a pretty far leap from there to normal-looking. Pierce Brosnan does very little for me, but that doesn’t mean I can’t see that he’s pretty far from normal-looking. ---
**Author:** ![chaoticbear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f07891/32.png) [@chaoticbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chaoticbear)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2005, 10:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-the-ordinary-looking-gay-men/302576/53 "2005-05-08T10:53:39Z")
> [@jayjay](#): > > We sleep together every night, so yeah. 😃 :smack: So all of my hitting on you has been for nothing? I think I’m going to go burn myself at a stake. ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2005, 2:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-the-ordinary-looking-gay-men/302576/54 "2005-05-08T14:05:38Z")
> [@chaoticdonkey](#): > > :smack: > > So all of my hitting on you has been for nothing? I think I’m going to go burn myself at a stake. You were hitting on me?! You have GOT to work on your technique! And no, not a waste of time, in THAT aspect, anyway. We’ve got…arrangements… 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Walloon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/fbc32d/32.png) [@Walloon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Walloon)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2005, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-the-ordinary-looking-gay-men/302576/55 "2005-05-08T16:43:07Z")
Head shot of the [young John Goodman](http://club.telepolis.com/srapaquito/miticos2/pages/john-goodman.htm). The media are always going to prefer looks over reality. Desperate housewives don’t look like that, either. ---
**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2005, 4:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-the-ordinary-looking-gay-men/302576/56 "2005-05-08T16:58:33Z")
> [@psychobunny](#): > > **Sampiro** , I love your profile. If only I was gay…and male…or you were straight…Are you sure you’re gay? 😉 Allow me to check… 😉😃 ---
**Author:** ![chaoticbear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f07891/32.png) [@chaoticbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chaoticbear)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2005, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-the-ordinary-looking-gay-men/302576/57 "2005-05-08T17:16:40Z")
> [@jayjay](#): > > You were hitting on me?! > > You have GOT to work on your technique! > > And no, not a waste of time, in THAT aspect, anyway. We’ve got…arrangements… 😃 Well, in my mind, anyway. So when are you coming down to Arkansas next? 😛 ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2005, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-the-ordinary-looking-gay-men/302576/58 "2005-05-08T17:31:20Z")
> [@chaoticdonkey](#): > > Well, in my mind, anyway. So when are you coming down to Arkansas next? 😛 Heh. I identify with that. My best flirting has been done in my own mind. 😉 Arkansas? Ewwww… We’re going to be in New Orleans for Southern Decadence/Convergence, though! 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![supervenusfreak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@supervenusfreak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/supervenusfreak)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2005, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-the-ordinary-looking-gay-men/302576/59 "2005-05-08T17:46:20Z")
> [@jayjay](#): > > Heh. I identify with that. My best flirting has been done in my own mind. 😉 > > Arkansas? Ewwww… We’re going to be in New Orleans for Southern Decadence/Convergence, though! 🆒 Why are you ewwwing Arkansas? It is the home of at least one fine man… 😉 ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2005, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-the-ordinary-looking-gay-men/302576/60 "2005-05-08T17:54:22Z")
> [@supervenusfreak](#): > > Why are you ewwwing Arkansas? It is the home of at least one fine man… 😉 You’re just saying that because you want to use me as bait… 😛 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-the-ordinary-looking-gay-men/302576.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-are-the-ordinary-looking-gay-men/302576.md?page=4)