# Where can a geek find love? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [October 13, 2002, 4:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-can-a-geek-find-love/132049 "2002-10-13T04:36:03Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Stentor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d2c977/32.png) [@Stentor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stentor)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2002, 4:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-can-a-geek-find-love/132049/1 "2002-10-13T04:36:03Z")
I’m a geek. Or a weirdo, however you want ot see it. Rather intelligent, shy, “nice guy”. Always have been, always will be. No changing it without comlete self destruction. I’m not ugly by any means. My face is okay, I’m rather skinny, with some muscle definition. Trying to find a steady girlfriend. People (mostly women who are rejecting me) keep telling me that there’s someone out there for me, etc. etc. I’m tired of waiting for her, especially since assholes at work keep asking me when was the last time I got laid. Trying to meet a nice girl for love and romance. If I hear the phrase “let’s just be friends” again I’m going to scream. Anybody have any ideas on where geeks go to meet each other with the intention of making sweet geek love. ---
**Author:** ![Lodrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c4cdca/32.png) [@Lodrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lodrain)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2002, 5:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-can-a-geek-find-love/132049/2 "2002-10-13T05:58:05Z")
Ye gods, it was like looking into a mirror! You and I share similar problems, and my advice is to find some activity in which you can let yourself go – for me, it was acting, especially improvisational acting, where my freakish sense of humor can play in the open. Looks don’t matter if you’re side-splittingly funny. Trust me – while I don’t know from personal experience, I’ve seen it happen. I still have never been in a signifigant reciprocal relationship with another human being, but I’ve most certainly got friends now. ---
**Author:** ![phouka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c5a1d2/32.png) [@phouka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/phouka)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2002, 6:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-can-a-geek-find-love/132049/3 "2002-10-13T06:08:46Z")
Hey, we’re out here. I’d rather a geek guy than just about any other type. The only problem is that I’m on the other side of the country from you. _sigh_ ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2002, 6:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-can-a-geek-find-love/132049/4 "2002-10-13T06:51:42Z")
Try [here](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=139295). ---
**Author:** ![DarrenS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/977dab/32.png) [@DarrenS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DarrenS)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2002, 6:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-can-a-geek-find-love/132049/5 "2002-10-13T06:52:08Z")
I’ve never tried it myself, but have you considered joining Mensa? Supposedly a great place to meet intelligent members of the opposite sex (and of the same sex). ---
**Author:** ![butter\_pie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/aca169/32.png) [@butter\_pie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/butter_pie)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2002, 7:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-can-a-geek-find-love/132049/6 "2002-10-13T07:12:08Z")
Make a funny webpage. It worked for my SO. That’s how I found him. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Ranchoth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranchoth/32/1066_2.png) [@Ranchoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranchoth)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2002, 7:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-can-a-geek-find-love/132049/7 "2002-10-13T07:25:46Z")
Is that a new “Zen” posting technique, Tuckerfan? 😉 That being said, I’d have to warn the OP that there’s been a long noted (if not yet put down in definate numbers) disparity in the ratio of geek males to geek females. It’s yet another cruel trick that nature has played upon our people. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Siege](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dbc845/32.png) [@Siege](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siege)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2002, 10:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-can-a-geek-find-love/132049/8 "2002-10-13T10:10:44Z")
Geek female checking in. **DarrenS** is right. Try Mensa, where intelligence is considered sexy. Specifically, try the RG (Regional Gathering) in Williamsburg Nov. 8-10th, since it should be reasonably close to you. E-mail me if you need more information. Also, there are eligible females at SF Conventions. I should know – that’s where I met the two guys who seduced me into Mensa. CJ ---
**Author:** ![Khadaji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Khadaji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khadaji)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2002, 1:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-can-a-geek-find-love/132049/9 "2002-10-13T13:45:53Z")
Big old geek checking in. I confess that I have the same problem, although I seem to do alright with women when I’m able to meet them. Its just that, there are so few women in my profession and I’m not really much of a barfly. ---
**Author:** ![mandielise](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/58956e/32.png) [@mandielise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mandielise)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2002, 2:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-can-a-geek-find-love/132049/10 "2002-10-13T14:16:41Z")
You sound just like my Paul. He’s just so cute and funny and smart… I jsut don’t know how every other girl passed him up. Seriously, don’t stress about it. I know you’ve probably heard thsi a million times, but if you’re meeting girls who think you’re too geeky or can’t appreciate your intelligence, they’re just not the right people for you. The best relationships are the dorky ones!!! ---
**Author:** ![Urban\_Ranger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/e9c0ed/32.png) [@Urban\_Ranger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Urban_Ranger)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2002, 2:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-can-a-geek-find-love/132049/11 "2002-10-13T14:36:46Z")
You know what you need? Some backbone. Most nice guys are pushovers, so they don’t inspire confidence. Oh, and self-confidence too. ---
**Author:** ![handy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b5a626/32.png) [@handy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/handy)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2002, 4:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-can-a-geek-find-love/132049/12 "2002-10-13T16:05:51Z")
Borrow a puppy, kitty or baby & walk down to the park or beach with them, this brings lots of women up. Or take sign language at a college, lots of women in those classes. Have you asked a woman how you might do your hair & clothes to appear more attractive? ---
**Author:** ![TVGuy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/82dd89/32.png) [@TVGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TVGuy)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2002, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-can-a-geek-find-love/132049/13 "2002-10-13T16:19:57Z")
When **you** find out, let me know, 'K? ---
**Author:** ![Daerlyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/898d66/32.png) [@Daerlyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Daerlyn)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2002, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-can-a-geek-find-love/132049/14 "2002-10-13T16:49:44Z")
Geek girl here and proud of it. 🙂 Try Canada. We seem to have a higher ratio here. 🙂 In all seriousness, though, just do things that attract intelligent non-superficial people. If you start taking a class in something obscure that interests you, your chances are better with anyone you meet there than Betty Blow out of the bar. ---
**Author:** ![Khadaji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Khadaji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khadaji)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2002, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-can-a-geek-find-love/132049/15 "2002-10-13T18:52:14Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Daerlyn \* > \*\*Geek girl here and proud of it. 🙂 Try Canada. We seem to have a higher ratio here. 🙂 > > In all seriousness, though, just do things that attract intelligent non-superficial people. If you start taking a class in something obscure that interests you, your chances are better with anyone you meet there than Betty Blow out of the bar. \*\* Cool. And most of the Canandian women that I have met are hot too! ---
**Author:** ![vix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/a88e4f/32.png) [@vix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vix)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2002, 11:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-can-a-geek-find-love/132049/16 "2002-10-13T23:43:45Z")
Dopefests. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![vix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/a88e4f/32.png) [@vix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vix)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2002, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-can-a-geek-find-love/132049/17 "2002-10-13T23:49:23Z")
Dopefests. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Stentor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d2c977/32.png) [@Stentor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stentor)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2002, 2:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-can-a-geek-find-love/132049/18 "2002-10-14T14:08:23Z")
Thanks for the advice, guys. I’m thinking I’ll try mensa and a cooking class, provided I can find time. ---
**Author:** ![CoderSlave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/bbce88/32.png) [@CoderSlave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CoderSlave)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2002, 8:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-can-a-geek-find-love/132049/19 "2002-10-17T08:13:38Z")
Hey, Im a Geek, and a Dork, etc. Ive chased after 3 girls in my life time and got the usual “We should just be friends” from all 3. ON THE OTHER HAND…Many, Many hot girls have chased after me and “caught” me when I least expected it (I was in a very stoic phase for all of them). One of them was a model 🙂 (but she was VERY F-ED up in the head ☹ ) My advice: Be yourself and dont give a Damn about what anyone else thinks. You do not need to try to find a girl: The girl that is meant to be with you (at least for now) will come to you if you only be yourself and let what Will Happen, Happen. My 2cents ---
**Author:** ![welby1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/838e76/32.png) [@welby1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/welby1)\ **Post date:** [October 17, 2002, 11:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-can-a-geek-find-love/132049/20 "2002-10-17T11:48:29Z")
**Coder Slave** is right. I met my wife at a business meeting, at time when I wasn’t looking for a date, a girlfriend, and most definitely not a wife. Be yourself, don’t try to be what you think others want you to be, it’ll just make you miserable and the chick will find out you’re a geek later anyway. As for your co-workers, who gives a shit what they think? Do you care enough about any of thier opinions to worry that much about it? Who are they, in realtion to your happiness? Answer: Nothing. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-can-a-geek-find-love/132049.md?page=2)