# Where has Skald run off to? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 10, 2012, 9:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-has-skald-run-off-to/612458 "2012-02-10T21:28:42Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![CapnPitt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/edb3f5/32.png) [@CapnPitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CapnPitt)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2012, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-has-skald-run-off-to/612458/101 "2012-06-06T20:28:26Z")
Am I the only one that always reads his name as “Skald the Rhymer, but Don’t Kill the Messenger”? ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2012, 8:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-has-skald-run-off-to/612458/102 "2012-06-06T20:34:21Z")
Do we have a way to be sure this is the real Skald returning? Maybe this is one from an alternate universe that has a beard, or doesn’t, depending on what the original looked like. I suggest we use caution in dealing with this evil version, or good version, depending on which one he used to be. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2012, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-has-skald-run-off-to/612458/103 "2012-06-06T20:36:27Z")
You guys, something’s wrong with **Skald**. He’s saying some really weird stuff. I think… I think he wants to have _sex_ with me! ---
**Author:** ![Senegoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senegoid/32/6606_2.png) [@Senegoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Senegoid)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2012, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-has-skald-run-off-to/612458/104 "2012-06-06T23:13:58Z")
And he’s back to posting [elaborate convoluted hypotheticals](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=654348) with “What would you do?” polls, in case anyone here hasn’t noticed yet. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2012, 9:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-has-skald-run-off-to/612458/105 "2012-06-10T21:31:05Z")
> [@TriPolar](#): > > Do we have a way to be sure this is the real Skald returning? Maybe this is one from an alternate universe that has a beard, or doesn’t, depending on what the original looked like. I suggest we use caution in dealing with this evil version, or good version, depending on which one he used to be. :: shoots **TriPolar** in the kneecap for no reason whatsover :: :: summons medical minions, watches as they fix his wounds without administering any painkillers :: :: takes **TriPolar’s** wallet and throws it into river :: ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2012, 9:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-has-skald-run-off-to/612458/106 "2012-06-10T21:34:21Z")
Yep, looks like the real **Skald**! ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2012, 9:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-has-skald-run-off-to/612458/107 "2012-06-10T21:34:56Z")
> [@WhyNot](#): > > Yep, looks like the real **Skald**! :: sends WhyNot a box of Turkish Delight on account of her being on the Short List :: ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2012, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-has-skald-run-off-to/612458/108 "2012-06-10T21:36:51Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > :: sends WhyNot a box of Turkish Delight on account of her being on the Short List :: ::eyes the Turkish Delight with suspicion:: Hey, **TriPolar** , how ya feeling? Want a piece of Turkish Delight? ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2012, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-has-skald-run-off-to/612458/109 "2012-06-10T21:40:42Z")
> [@WhyNot](#): > > ::eyes the Turkish Delight with suspicion:: > > Hey, **TriPolar** , how ya feeling? Want a piece of Turkish Delight? Dearest one, you forget that you are (a) on the Short List, and (b) a chick, and thus protected by the sexist no-hitting-girls rule. ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2012, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-has-skald-run-off-to/612458/110 "2012-06-10T22:05:39Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > Dearest one, you forget that you are (a) on the Short List, and (b) a chick, and thus protected by the sexist no-hitting-girls rule. :: eyes \*\*Skald the Rhymer \*\*with suspicion:: Well, it doesn’t seem to have harmed **TriPolar** … ::tastes the Turkish Delight:: ::waits to turn into a newt…:: ---
**Author:** ![carlotta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/898d66/32.png) [@carlotta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carlotta)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2012, 12:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-has-skald-run-off-to/612458/111 "2012-06-11T00:05:54Z")
> [@CapnPitt](#): > > Am I the only one that always reads his name as “Skald the Rhymer, but Don’t Kill the Messenger”? Not before, but every single time now, thanks for that. ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2012, 12:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-has-skald-run-off-to/612458/112 "2012-06-11T12:04:49Z")
> [@WhyNot](#): > > :: eyes \*\*Skald the Rhymer \*\*with suspicion:: > > Well, it doesn’t seem to have harmed **TriPolar** … > > ::tastes the Turkish Delight:: > > ::waits to turn into a newt…:: Just watch out if he claims there’s more in his castle. ---
**Author:** ![CapnPitt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/edb3f5/32.png) [@CapnPitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CapnPitt)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2012, 1:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-has-skald-run-off-to/612458/113 "2012-06-11T13:07:15Z")
> [@carlotta](#): > > Not before, but every single time now, thanks for that. Sorry. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2012, 7:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-has-skald-run-off-to/612458/114 "2012-06-13T19:59:22Z")
Hey, **Skald** , welcome back! Good to have you return - hope it’s to stay. And jeez, 113 posts and not a single mention of Natalie Portman as the reason for your absence? What are these people thinking…? ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2012, 10:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-has-skald-run-off-to/612458/115 "2012-06-13T22:49:57Z")
> [@WhyNot](#): > > Yep, looks like the real **Skald**! I’m not so sure. He uses a conventional weapon, some minor discomfort instead of actual torture, no supernatural forces at all (unless the medical minions are magically enthralled somehow), and just now I fished my wallet out of the river and all the cash is still in it. ---
**Author:** ![wevets](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e9a140/32.png) [@wevets](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wevets)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2012, 11:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-has-skald-run-off-to/612458/116 "2012-06-13T23:15:12Z")
Well, those medical minions did have to be _summoned_ . . . . . . _FROM HELL!_ [sub]No, really, Hell has some very good medical schools. And little problem with the graduates emigrating.[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![WhyNot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c77e96/32.png) [@WhyNot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WhyNot)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2012, 11:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-has-skald-run-off-to/612458/117 "2012-06-13T23:25:51Z")
> [@TriPolar](#): > > I’m not so sure. He uses a conventional weapon, some minor discomfort instead of actual torture, no supernatural forces at all (unless the medical minions are magically enthralled somehow), and just now I fished my wallet out of the river and all the cash is still in it. And I’m not even a newt. I do feel a compelling urge to offer you up to 15% off on your car insurance, though… ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2012, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-has-skald-run-off-to/612458/118 "2012-06-14T20:41:33Z")
> [@TriPolar](#): > > I’m not so sure. He uses a conventional weapon, some minor discomfort instead of actual torture, no supernatural forces at all (unless the medical minions are magically enthralled somehow), and just now I fished my wallet out of the river and all the cash is still in it. So what I’m hearing here is that you’re complaining about not being decapitated by a light sabre, eaten by cockroaches, or having all the money in your bank account stolen. Interesting. > [@WhyNot](#): > > And I’m not even a newt. I do feel a compelling urge to offer you up to 15% off on your car insurance, though… Short List, dear. Whenever you, Anaamika, Oak, Chronos, the Doc, and the other three sin, your punishment is assigned to someone else. Seriously, does NO ONE read the faq? ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2012, 9:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-has-skald-run-off-to/612458/119 "2012-06-14T21:30:27Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > So what I’m hearing here is that you’re complaining about not being decapitated by a light sabre, eaten by cockroaches, or having all the money in your bank account stolen. > > Interesting. Well except for the stolen part. With my wallet, the real Skald would have emptied the contents into the river before throwing the wallet in. Now you’ve been away doing … well something I guess … so maybe you’re still settling in or something. That would explain the lack of _ **Skaldiness** _. Or you might actually be the one with beard, or not, depending on whether or not you used to have a beard. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2012, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-has-skald-run-off-to/612458/120 "2012-06-14T21:42:20Z")
> [@TriPolar](#): > > Well except for the stolen part. With my wallet, the real Skald would have emptied the contents into the river before throwing the wallet in. > > Now you’ve been away doing … well something I guess … so maybe you’re still settling in or something. That would explain the lack of _ **Skaldiness** _. Or you might actually be the one with beard, or not, depending on whether or not you used to have a beard. Silly ThunderCat. If I’d emptied the wallet before throwing it into the river, you would not have been forced to jump in after it. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-has-skald-run-off-to/612458.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-has-skald-run-off-to/612458.md?page=7)