# Where the hell are my keys? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 18, 2001, 6:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-are-my-keys/54965 "2001-02-18T06:57:53Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![schief2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cab0a1/32.png) [@schief2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/schief2)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2001, 6:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-are-my-keys/54965/1 "2001-02-18T06:57:53Z")
I mean, really. It’s starting to freak me out, big time. I came home last night, and then discussed a bit of disturbing news with my roommate. A while later, I went to bed. At some point during that time, I apparently took out and set down my keys somewhere. _But I don’t know where._ I found everything else this morning - my wallet, spare change, etc. But not the keys. It’s like they’ve vanished off the face of the earth. I’ve probably spent at least two hours so far looking for them; I’ve torn apart every nook and cranny in this place to no avail. (I even hand-picked out garbage from the garbage can in case they fell in there, for god’s sake.) I’ve never lost my keys before, not for more than about 10 minutes, anyway. The really disturbing part is that both my main keyring and the separate key that goes to the rental car I’ve currently got are missing. Two separate sets of keys that I remember last having at separate points in the evening…both gone. Before it was merely groin-kickingly annoying. But it’s starting to acquire a bit of urgency, since they’ve been missing for almost a day now. I even had to borrow my roommate’s car to get to work today. Please come back, keys. I konw we’ve had some rough spots, but we can work through this together. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Persephone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecc23a/32.png) [@Persephone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Persephone)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2001, 7:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-are-my-keys/54965/2 "2001-02-18T07:06:43Z")
I started a thread similar to this several weeks ago, regarding a missing remote. The Dopers were most helpful. I’d suggest looking in your coat pockets, or between the couch cushions. That seems to be the place that most of my missing stuff turns up. Best of luck! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Obvious\_Guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/e9c0ed/32.png) [@Obvious\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Obvious_Guy)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2001, 8:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-are-my-keys/54965/3 "2001-02-18T08:09:54Z")
Could it be the roommate? Maybe he gets his jollies from hiding peoples keys!! ---
**Author:** ![big\_yellow\_kingswood](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/8e8cbc/32.png) [@big\_yellow\_kingswood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/big_yellow_kingswood)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2001, 11:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-are-my-keys/54965/4 "2001-02-18T11:59:33Z")
check your front door. That’s where my mother always leaves her keys… just hanging there in the lock. ---
**Author:** ![BornDodgy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e19b73/32.png) [@BornDodgy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BornDodgy)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2001, 12:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-are-my-keys/54965/5 "2001-02-18T12:14:37Z")
I leave mine in the lock too (it really gets annoying when you leave them in other ppl’s locks… long story) try your drawers - maybe you opened one with the keys still in your hand and they fell in there… dodgy ---
**Author:** ![August\_West](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/august_west/32/18069_2.png) [@August\_West](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/August_West)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2001, 1:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-are-my-keys/54965/6 "2001-02-18T13:30:42Z")
Did you look in the freezer? I found my keys in the freezer once and now it’s the first place I look. ---
**Author:** ![Patty\_O\_Furniture](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/96bed5/32.png) [@Patty\_O\_Furniture](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Patty_O_Furniture)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2001, 2:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-are-my-keys/54965/7 "2001-02-18T14:01:38Z")
•The rental car is still there, right? •Do you have any pets (besides the roommate)? •Check the lining of your coat- one of your pockets is torn inside and I sense that something metal has fallen through the lining. •Behind the seat cushions. •Under/around the area where you usually toss your coat when you come home. •The laundry hamper. •Yesterday’s jeans, if they’re not in the laundry hamper. •Under/inside the pizza box that you haven’t thrown away yet, you slob. •Inside the mailbox (you might have closed it with your keys inside). •_In_ the washing machine, especialy if you changed your bed sheets after you got home but before you went to bed. •In the junk drawer, with the tonail clippers & combination locks that you can’t remember the combinations for. •Under the sofa/bed/other large furniture. Keys that fall on the floor are often kicked into hiding places. What other keys are on your key ring? Back yard shed? Look there. Basement tool box? Look down there. Bicycle padlock? Check there. Were there any guests in your place (possible invited in by your roommate)? Somebody may have picked them up accidentally, in which case they wouldn’t admit to it since they didn’t realize it. ---
**Author:** ![ChiefScott](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/58f4c7/32.png) [@ChiefScott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ChiefScott)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2001, 2:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-are-my-keys/54965/8 "2001-02-18T14:07:27Z")
Check on top of the fridge. You go into the house all tired after a hard day, head to the fridge to grab a cold one, and absent-mindedly set them down there. Or it could be key pixies… ---
**Author:** ![PunditLisa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/4af34b/32.png) [@PunditLisa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PunditLisa)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2001, 2:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-are-my-keys/54965/9 "2001-02-18T14:31:05Z")
Pray to the key gods. And once you find them, trot on down to your neighborhood hardware store and have a duplicate set made. I once lived a whole month using a duplicate set of keys before I found my original set. (All right, if you must know, they were in a shopping bag full of Xmas presents that I hid in the basement. I must have dropped the keys in the bag once I opened the door.) Good luck! ---
**Author:** ![Sylkyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/da6949/32.png) [@Sylkyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sylkyn)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2001, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-are-my-keys/54965/10 "2001-02-18T14:42:47Z")
Re-trace your steps. Go through every motion you made before the keys became MIA. Every time I have done this, I have found my keys, and they’re usually somewhere relatively obvious. Sometimes you are looking so hard that you overlook them completely. Take it from someone who loses their keys at least once a week. ---
**Author:** ![Ruffian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/71e660/32.png) [@Ruffian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ruffian)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2001, 3:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-are-my-keys/54965/11 "2001-02-18T15:25:08Z")
Not that this is at all helpful, but there’s a stakes-winning racehorse currently winning major races and mega bucks with the amusing name of “Hoovergetthekeys.” (BTW, I lose my keys–and my ATM card–probably once a month. Typically, they are in either coat or jean pockets, stuffed in the sofa, or buried in the “wrong” part of my purse.) ---
**Author:** ![Turbo\_Dog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ce73a5/32.png) [@Turbo\_Dog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Turbo_Dog)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2001, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-are-my-keys/54965/12 "2001-02-18T15:37:17Z")
They are in the last place you left them…DUH! With me, I’m a very organized person. Everything has it’s place. Keys, lighter, wallet, money clip, mail, everything. So on the days that I slip up and put something in a different place, it’s all over. I’ve lost my wallet for days before, only to find it on the sink in a bathroom that I don’t use. I once lost my keys for 3 days, only to find them in the usual spot, in plain view, because I had changed my keychain toy and didn’t associate it. (Was looking for a cool medallion rather than The Tick). Go slow, and retrace your steps. Always works for me. ---
**Author:** ![Lsura](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7993a0/32.png) [@Lsura](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lsura)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2001, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-are-my-keys/54965/13 "2001-02-18T17:44:49Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by ChiefScott \* > \*\*Or it could be key pixies… \*\* ah…so it’s underwear gnomes and key pixies, eh? I always new that those were 2 different species. ---
**Author:** ![schief2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cab0a1/32.png) [@schief2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/schief2)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2001, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-are-my-keys/54965/14 "2001-02-18T19:16:54Z")
Well, I was hoping that my return to this thread would be one of triumph…me posting something like, “Doh! Can you believe the keys were _glued to the cat_? I don’t know why I didn’t think to look there!” But alas, a morning’s worth of searching has yielded no results. > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Obvious Guy \* > \*\*Could it be the roommate? Maybe he gets his jollies from hiding peoples keys!! \*\* Thought about it, actually…but if he was going to do that, why would he loan me his car all day? > [@](#): > > _Originally posted by Attrayant_ > **•Yesterday’s jeans, if they’re not in the laundry hamper.** Ah, that’s where the wallet/spare change was. (And usually, where the keys should be, too…) > [@](#): > > **•Under the sofa/bed/other large furniture. Keys that fall on the floor are often kicked into hiding places.** I’ve already done one round of heavy lifting, but I’m thinking I’m going to do another. > [@](#): > > **(Numerous other good ideas)** Thanks, but I’ve either looked in those places or they’re n/a. > [@](#): > > _Originally posted by big\_yellow\_kingswood, BornDodgy, August West, SilkyThreat, Turbo Dog, Ruffian_ > **(More good ideas)** See above… ☹ > [@](#): > > _Originally posted by ChiefScott_ > \*\*Check on top of the fridge. \*\* You have no idea what kind of a light bulb went off when I read this. But nope. At this point, though, I’m prepared to pull the fridge out to see if they fell down the side or something. > [@](#): > > _Originally posted by PunditLisa_ > **Pray to the key gods.** Pray? At this point I’d offer them a first-born son if I thought it would help… The last place I remember having the house keyring for sure was on the kitchen counter, as I was unloading groceries. To that end, I’ve torn apart the kitchen, including both counter space and where I stowed groceries, and as I said, even picked through the trash, in case they were with the bags that I threw away. The last place I remember having the rental car key was sitting on the couch later in my room, feeling it start to slide out of my pocket and pushing it back in. Needless to say, I have all but firebombed the couch and the area around it looking for the keys. Thanks for the good suggestions all…the house keyring is not too big of a deal, since I’ve got spares or could replace most of it with minimal hassle. But that rental car’s due back tomorrow, and I’ve got visions of a huge bonus fine dancing in my head. Back to the search… ---
**Author:** ![Turbo\_Dog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ce73a5/32.png) [@Turbo\_Dog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Turbo_Dog)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2001, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-are-my-keys/54965/15 "2001-02-18T19:36:43Z")
Try firebombing the couch. A babysitter once lost her keys in my house, that had a three inch dia. plastic picture frame attached. Tore the house apart for weeks, couch upside down, inside out, even outside the windows. Never found them. Two years later we moved halfway across the country. The movers brought in the couch, unwrapped the plastic wrap from it, and no shit… the keys fell out on the floor, picture included. This was after half a dozen disassemblies of it to clean out standard little kid stuff… (silverware, toys, fruit loops, old sandwiches, etc…) Couches with keys can be like a dog with a bone. Check your garbage disposal…keys may have been knocked off the counter into the sink. Why would your roommate do it? umm… cuz it’s probably funny as hell watching you tearing apart the house in a panic about the rental key 😃 ---
**Author:** ![rocking\_chair](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rocking_chair/32/2918_2.png) [@rocking\_chair](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rocking_chair)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2001, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-are-my-keys/54965/16 "2001-02-18T19:38:23Z")
the keys now know that you are looking for them. you must trick them by looking for something else. then you will find them. did you move the couch? sometimes keys and stuff will drop through the couch, or catch in that dust thing tacked to the bottom of the couch. in the kitchen are there cabinets that keys can go under? you may have dropped and accidentally kicked them under the fridge, or an island/ cabinet. when you were unloading the groceries did you decant anything? ie coffee in to coffee tin, rice into tupperware, cadbury mini eggs into a bowl? ---
**Author:** ![schief2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cab0a1/32.png) [@schief2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/schief2)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2001, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-are-my-keys/54965/17 "2001-02-18T20:11:58Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Turbo Dog \* > **Try firebombing the couch.** **Turbo Dog** , if you ever come through this neck of the woods, I’ll buy you a six-pack of your namesake. (You do cull your username from the Abita beer of the same name, right?) I’ve probably gone over that couch half a dozen times in the last day, including moving it out, tilting it upside down, and poking into every nook and cranny. But I read your post, and figured, ah what the hell, I’ll give it one more shot. So I took off my watch and reached as far as I could possibly get under the back cushions. And like the voice of angels from heaven, I heard a slight metallic jingle. Yep. Though they were on different rings, _both_ sets of keys were lurking side-by-side amidst Cheerios that have probably lay undisturbed for ten years. Sir, I tip my hat to you and your superior key-finding skills. Thanks. ---
**Author:** ![schief2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cab0a1/32.png) [@schief2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/schief2)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2001, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-are-my-keys/54965/18 "2001-02-18T20:20:40Z")
And thanks to everyone else who chimed in with lots of other good ideas, too. I was going half-crazy trying to figure out if there was any place I’d overlooked, and you guys gave me lots of other likely places to check. Too bad none of them were right… 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Girlbysea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c6cbf5/32.png) [@Girlbysea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Girlbysea)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2001, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-are-my-keys/54965/19 "2001-02-18T20:39:52Z")
So these key’s I found aren’t yours?.. ---
**Author:** ![InternetLegend](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/internetlegend/32/13154_2.png) [@InternetLegend](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/InternetLegend)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2001, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-are-my-keys/54965/20 "2001-02-18T21:43:43Z")
I’d still go with the couch, if yours is anything like mine. I’ll trade you problems right now, though. My younger daughter lost a _hamster_ in our couch about an hour ago and we haven’t had any luck finding him (or luring him back out) yet. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-are-my-keys/54965.md?page=2)