# Where the hell is my sweater!!! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 19, 2003, 7:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-is-my-sweater/149607 "2003-01-19T07:51:15Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Rilchiam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@Rilchiam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rilchiam)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 7:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-is-my-sweater/149607/1 "2003-01-19T07:51:15Z")
I cannot find my sweater. My striped, front-button sweater that I wear every fucking day. I thought I wore it last night and took it off when I went to bed. Now, I may be wrong about that, since [yesterday was rather traumatic for me](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=157237). But even if my memory is faulty, it still should be **somewhere**!! It’s not in either of the hampers. It’s not hanging on any of the coat hooks. It’s not in, on under or around the beds. It’s not in either of the closets. It’s not in either of the bathrooms. It’s not on or around the couch. It’s not under the coffee table or the desk. It’s not on the back of any of the chairs. I don’t think this is related to yesterday’s incident: I’m not unable to find anything else, I don’t have any gaps in my memory, and Mr. Rilch says I haven’t done anything erratic since I got home yesterday. **SO WHERE THE FUCK IS IT?!** I’m ready to blow a gasket. It can’t have left the apartment, but I’ve exhausted all the possibilities. I’ve started looking in outlandish places like the freezer, and under the sink. It better not be in the trash, or I will be extremely pissed. ---
**Author:** ![leander](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/bcef8e/32.png) [@leander](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/leander)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 8:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-is-my-sweater/149607/2 "2003-01-19T08:02:55Z")
Did you check your car? (For some reason I’ve found many a misplaced item in my car) ---
**Author:** ![Rilchiam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@Rilchiam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rilchiam)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 8:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-is-my-sweater/149607/3 "2003-01-19T08:06:45Z")
It MAY be in the truck. I’ll check tomorrow morning. I think not, though, since the last two times I went out, I wore the black blazer. ---
**Author:** ![chicken\_99](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e68b1a/32.png) [@chicken\_99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chicken_99)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 2:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-is-my-sweater/149607/4 "2003-01-19T14:18:34Z")
hear this: your sweater has been stolen. That old lady over there has it. ---
**Author:** ![Jack\_Batty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jack_batty/32/3201_2.png) [@Jack\_Batty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jack_Batty)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 2:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-is-my-sweater/149607/5 "2003-01-19T14:32:04Z")
Look in the refrigerator. It probably isn’t in there, but unless you look, you can’t really say, “I’ve looked everywhere.” Besides the more you hunt for it, the more tempted you’ll be to look in there … so you may as well get it over with. ---
**Author:** ![Jack\_Batty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jack_batty/32/3201_2.png) [@Jack\_Batty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jack_Batty)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 2:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-is-my-sweater/149607/6 "2003-01-19T14:38:11Z")
I need to start reading OP’s a little closer. Please change the word “refrigerator” in my post to something a little less redundant and yet equally comedic. May I suggest, “too shed”? ---
**Author:** ![Jack\_Batty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jack_batty/32/3201_2.png) [@Jack\_Batty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jack_Batty)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 2:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-is-my-sweater/149607/7 "2003-01-19T14:39:12Z")
Or “tool shed”, whichever. ---
**Author:** ![friedo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8edcca/32.png) [@friedo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/friedo)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 2:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-is-my-sweater/149607/8 "2003-01-19T14:40:10Z")
Hey man, if you can afford to have _two hampers_, I think you can handle getting a new sweater. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![TwistofFate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cdc98d/32.png) [@TwistofFate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TwistofFate)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 2:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-is-my-sweater/149607/9 "2003-01-19T14:41:59Z")
Dancing in the disco, bumper to bumper. Wait a minute Where’s me Jumper? Where’s me Jumper? Where’s me Jumper? oh no. sorry, the thread title made me have a Sultans of Ping F.C. flashback. ---
**Author:** ![Neidhart](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Neidhart](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Neidhart)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 2:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-is-my-sweater/149607/10 "2003-01-19T14:45:42Z")
It ran off with [my beeper.](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=157313) ---
**Author:** ![Ayesha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c0e974/32.png) [@Ayesha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ayesha)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 2:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-is-my-sweater/149607/11 "2003-01-19T14:48:24Z")
Did you leave it at the hospital ? ---
**Author:** ![Duke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e8c25b/32.png) [@Duke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duke)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-is-my-sweater/149607/12 "2003-01-19T17:11:09Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Neidhart \* > \*\*It ran off with [my beeper.](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=157313) \*\* This gives me an idea, **Rilchiam**. Attach beepers to all your sweaters! That way, when you can’t find one of your sweaters, all you have to do is call it, then follow the beep! ---
**Author:** ![magog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/fbc32d/32.png) [@magog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/magog)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-is-my-sweater/149607/13 "2003-01-19T18:43:51Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Duke \* > \*\*This gives me an idea, **Rilchiam**. Attach beepers to all your sweaters! That way, when you can’t find one of your sweaters, all you have to do is call it, then follow the beep! \*\* What if you lose the phone? ---
**Author:** ![Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/50afbb/32.png) [@Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duck_Duck_Goose)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-is-my-sweater/149607/14 "2003-01-19T18:50:44Z")
All your sweater are belong to us. MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! ---
**Author:** ![Scarlett67](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scarlett67/32/7387_2.png) [@Scarlett67](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scarlett67)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-is-my-sweater/149607/15 "2003-01-19T18:58:52Z")
I’d check those coat hooks again. Seems whenever I’m missing something I’m likely to hang up, it’s hiding under another garment that’s also hanging up. ---
**Author:** ![ghandi5569](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d26b3c/32.png) [@ghandi5569](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ghandi5569)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-is-my-sweater/149607/16 "2003-01-19T20:12:42Z")
> [@](#): > > Look in the refrigerator. Also, check the freezer. I find all sorts of stuff there–duct tape, batteries, foodstuffs, and missing socks. So there is a possibility that the sweater is there. ---
**Author:** ![Sylkyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/da6949/32.png) [@Sylkyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sylkyn)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-is-my-sweater/149607/17 "2003-01-19T20:20:51Z")
I checked the refrigerator _and_ the freezer this morning. For my **cat**! We’d literally looked everyplace else. Cabinets, under coats, closets, under blankets, behind window blinds, the microwave, clothes piles, everywhere! We currently live in an apartment until our house is rebuilt (after a fire) and there aren’t many places she could hide. She’d been in my husband’s lap this morning, so we knew she was in the house. No doors had been opened for her to have escaped. I finally found her hidden snugly behind the washing machine, only her head barely sticking out. Check behind the washing machine or any other appliances. If my cat was there, your sweater might have hidden there, too. [sub]I really would have flipped had she actually been in the freezer. I was actually scared to open the door.[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![norinew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/eb9ed0/32.png) [@norinew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/norinew)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-is-my-sweater/149607/18 "2003-01-19T20:31:31Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by ghandi5569_ > Also, check the freezer. I find all sorts of stuff there–duct tape, batteries, foodstuffs, and missing socks. Ooooh, oooh, I know! I know! Obviously, **Rilchiam** , your sweater is in **ghandi’s** freezer!😃 Seiously, though, I hope that whatever traumatic events yesterday held for you, things are getting better. ---
**Author:** ![Rilchiam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@Rilchiam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rilchiam)\ **Post date:** [January 19, 2003, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-is-my-sweater/149607/19 "2003-01-19T23:21:19Z")
It was tangled up in the skirt I discarded Friday night! Serves me right for not hanging it up yesterday. It wasn’t until today, when I did start putting stuff away, that I felt something scratchy and woolen. Woohoo! **chicken#99** : Oh, I’d fight an old lady for this thing! No, I wouldn’t. But I’d bribe her with sugar-free candy and a lifetime sub to the Readers’ Digest. **Jack Batty** : We don’t have a tool shed. **friedo** : Yeah, but this is **the** sweater. Think of Linus and his blanket. **Twisty** : I don’t know that song. What era are we talking? **Neidhart** : Hope you find the beeper! **Ayesha** : I thought of that too, but I wasn’t wearing it at the hospital. I know if I had, I could kiss it goodbye: they’d return something expensive, like a leather jacket, but anything generic goes either into the used-clothing bin or to another patient. Not that I’d begrudge someone in need, of course. **Duke** and **magog** : We sometimes have trouble finding the phone, at that. Also, the remotes have a way of migrating, despite the fact that I got us a rack for safekeeping. **DDG** : Maybe that’s why I fell: somebody set me up the bonb! **Scarlett** : No, I checked the coat hooks several times, **and** moved every garment off of them. **ghandi** : The freezer is one of the first places I looked. **SilkyThreat** : Were I missing a cat, I would look in that skirt: it’s **huge**. **norinew** : Well, the swelling’s gone down, and my neck is no longer stiff. Thanks, all, for the good thoughts! ---
**Author:** ![ghandi5569](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d26b3c/32.png) [@ghandi5569](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ghandi5569)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2003, 12:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-is-my-sweater/149607/20 "2003-01-20T00:03:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Ooooh, oooh, I know! I know! Obviously, Rilchiam, your sweater is in ghandi’s freezer! Hold on, I’ll check. _shuffle, shuffle, shuffle_ _opens freezer and looks around_ _shuffles back to computer_ No sweaters, but there is mint chocolate chip ice cream, homemade cappuchino cookies, a roll of red duct tape, a mix cassette tape from 1998, part of a homemade lasanga, a cat toy, and half a box of sudafed. Richiam, would any of that make you feel better? 🙂 [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/where-the-hell-is-my-sweater/149607.md?page=2)