# Where's Aquaman when you really need him? Newslink

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wheres-aquaman-when-you-really-need-him-newslink/677237>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [December 26, 2013, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wheres-aquaman-when-you-really-need-him-newslink/677237 "2013-12-26T22:59:06Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 5\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\
**Post date:** [December 26, 2013, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wheres-aquaman-when-you-really-need-him-newslink/677237/1 "2013-12-26T22:59:06Z")

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[Sixty Injured In Mass Piranha Attack!](http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/southamerica/argentina/10538356/Sixty-hurt-in-Argentina-piranha-attack.html)

EEEPS!:eek:

> [@](#):
>
> The terror attack happened on Christmas Day on a popular beach on the Parana River in the city of Rosario, birthplace of Barcelona striker Messi.
> 
> Swimmers trying to cool down in 100 degrees Fahrenheit temperatures raced out of the water bleeding from wounds and shouting for help while the parents of children in the water rushed to their aid to drag them to safety.

Oh, sweet North America, I shall never leave thee!

The trout **never** do **that**!

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**Author:** ![Doctor\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctor_jackson/32/32_2.png) [@Doctor\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Jackson)\
**Post date:** [December 27, 2013, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wheres-aquaman-when-you-really-need-him-newslink/677237/2 "2013-12-27T21:22:12Z")

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Don’t be so [sure](http://www.tripadvisor.com/LocationPhotoDirectLink-g45277-d4242339-i66065055-Blackfoot_River_Outfitters-Missoula_Montana.html).

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**Author:** ![MacTech](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c0e974/32.png) [@MacTech](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MacTech)\
**Post date:** [December 27, 2013, 10:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wheres-aquaman-when-you-really-need-him-newslink/677237/3 "2013-12-27T22:46:04Z")

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Hmm, muskellunge, pike, and pickerel, these are the toothy freshwater North American fish, and they have long jaws, they’re also far less agressive

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**Author:** ![teela\_brown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d9b06d/32.png) [@teela\_brown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/teela_brown)\
**Post date:** [December 27, 2013, 10:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wheres-aquaman-when-you-really-need-him-newslink/677237/4 "2013-12-27T22:57:43Z")

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Anybody that swims in a river named “Parana” gotta expect trouble.

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**Author:** ![ducati](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/cc9497/32.png) [@ducati](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ducati)\
**Post date:** [December 29, 2013, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/wheres-aquaman-when-you-really-need-him-newslink/677237/5 "2013-12-29T20:09:56Z")

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I don’t swim anywhere there’s [gar](https://www.google.com/search?q=alligator+gar&client=firefox-a&hs=5FO&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ei=5oDAUornFM3SkQfmxICICQ&ved=0CAkQ_AUoAQ&biw=840&bih=428)hanging around. Well, mostly because there will be alligators hanging around as well, but still…