# Which 2 perks would you choose from this list? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [October 5, 2020, 10:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-2-perks-would-you-choose-from-this-list/922285 "2020-10-05T22:04:50Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Cmyers1980](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmyers1980/32/11814_2.png) [@Cmyers1980](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cmyers1980)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2020, 10:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-2-perks-would-you-choose-from-this-list/922285/1 "2020-10-05T22:04:50Z")
You get to choose 2 perks from this [list](https://i.redd.it/pdx22jqf1sq51.jpg) of perks. Which do you choose and why? I’d choose The Mic and Ask Away since I’d be able to use them to obtain ridiculous wealth, get the most fulfilling and happy life and get a career doing what I want (writing/directing). ---
**Author:** ![MacSpon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/34f0e0/32.png) [@MacSpon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MacSpon)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2020, 1:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-2-perks-would-you-choose-from-this-list/922285/2 "2020-10-06T01:04:36Z")
Stress Free Livin’ and Avatar. ---
**Author:** ![BrickBat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac91a4/32.png) [@BrickBat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrickBat)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2020, 1:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-2-perks-would-you-choose-from-this-list/922285/3 "2020-10-06T01:15:42Z")
Ask Away, and Godtube. I’ve an insatiable appetite for accurate recollection of things. ---
**Author:** ![elfkin477](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a9a28c/32.png) [@elfkin477](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfkin477)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2020, 1:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-2-perks-would-you-choose-from-this-list/922285/4 "2020-10-06T01:43:41Z")
Typewriter and Power Up+. I’ve long wished that something like the typewriter existed, and this even edits. And as for Power Up+, doing things - including thinking - double speed or at double strength would be really useful. ---
**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2020, 1:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-2-perks-would-you-choose-from-this-list/922285/5 "2020-10-06T01:52:42Z")
Typewriter and Avatar. The former for being able to more easily write, the latter because it’d be fun. ---
**Author:** ![TruCelt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trucelt/32/523_2.png) [@TruCelt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TruCelt)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2020, 2:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-2-perks-would-you-choose-from-this-list/922285/6 "2020-10-06T02:21:31Z")
StressFreeLivin and SimEarth. I live the easy life, anywhere I want to, and in return I can fix global warming. Maybe make the deserts bloom and start fixing those glaciers. I would def be on call to stop tornadoes and such, although it’s not clear whether I can fix earthquakes. And Kim Jong Il just caught himself a lifetime of full-on 24/7 lightning storms. I figure it’s got to get him eventually. ---
**Author:** ![Wesley\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wesley_clark/32/20581_2.png) [@Wesley\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wesley_Clark)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2020, 2:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-2-perks-would-you-choose-from-this-list/922285/7 "2020-10-06T02:24:56Z")
this is an interesting question. ask away and e tank. I could use ask away to help cure disease and come up with good business ideas to be independently wealthy. stress free living sounds good too though, but peak health is better. ---
**Author:** ![Scarlax](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scarlax/32/2927_2.png) [@Scarlax](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scarlax)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2020, 2:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-2-perks-would-you-choose-from-this-list/922285/8 "2020-10-06T02:28:01Z")
I’d cast Angry Birds on President Treason and then cast The Erection on all the birds. Rinse and repeat until he and his line have given up from the endless barrage of peckers. ---
**Author:** ![ekedolphin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ekedolphin/32/10003_2.png) [@ekedolphin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ekedolphin)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2020, 2:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-2-perks-would-you-choose-from-this-list/922285/9 "2020-10-06T02:29:47Z")
Typewriter because I love to write; Music Box because I love to sing and wish I could play a musical instrument and write music. Godtube was awfully tempting, though. ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2020, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-2-perks-would-you-choose-from-this-list/922285/10 "2020-10-06T04:12:09Z")
Telepathy and Magic ---
**Author:** ![Ponderoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponderoid/32/19221_2.png) [@Ponderoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponderoid)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2020, 11:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-2-perks-would-you-choose-from-this-list/922285/11 "2020-10-06T11:22:55Z")
A lot of tempting choices on there, but since I’m limited to two: E-tank and Avatar. E-tank because that’s pretty effective immortality as long as I live a quiet anonymous life. Avatar will be a huge help in maintaining my anonymity through the ages. I’ll always be able to keep a modern appearance as humanity evolves. Now I’ll have a new personal religion: Backup, backup, BACKUP! Which I really should already have, but with these my new enhanced life literally depends on me never losing working copies of these apps. ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2020, 12:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-2-perks-would-you-choose-from-this-list/922285/12 "2020-10-06T12:16:31Z")
Music Box - worth it just for the 5 languages add-on. God Tube - so much for received religion, and goodbye boring historical research and physical digging … ---
**Author:** ![Oredigger77](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/oredigger77/32/3181_2.png) [@Oredigger77](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oredigger77)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2020, 1:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-2-perks-would-you-choose-from-this-list/922285/13 "2020-10-06T13:20:20Z")
E-tank and Skype. The perfect answers would be nice but waiting two weeks is pretty limited. I think being at perfect health forever and resetting whenever is nice. It would make life much easier but depending on how many HP I got and how much damage things like bullets did would depend on how much I took advantage of it as opposed to just being in peak physical or mental health. I think the Skype one is pretty handy being able to lift 300,000 (1,000 times more than my peak physical form from e-tank) really eliminates the need for the double strength from the one at a time app. I’m uncertain how the mental communication or jedi mind tricks will work but it sounds like something that will come in handy. ---
**Author:** ![Wheelz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wheelz/32/5718_2.png) [@Wheelz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wheelz)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2020, 2:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-2-perks-would-you-choose-from-this-list/922285/14 "2020-10-06T14:44:25Z")
Nobody else is tempted by Delete? Lotsa folks need sendin’ to the cornfield these days. I _think_ I would use this power responsibly. 😉 My second one would probably be E-tank, though I’m not sure what “HP” refers to in this context. Depending on what is involved in maintaining HP, I might take a pass on this one. No point having immortality if I have to spend all my time obsessing over one thing. Carefree Livin’ is my backup choice. ---
**Author:** ![begbert2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/begbert2/32/3357_2.png) [@begbert2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/begbert2)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2020, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-2-perks-would-you-choose-from-this-list/922285/15 "2020-10-06T18:22:20Z")
HP means hit points. Which (if it follow the RPG model) means that you can take damage without experiencing significant detriment, until you take enough damage to reach your personal threshold, at which point you drop dead. (Presumably, to match the HP system, you’d be innately aware of when you’re getting low and should therefore stop sitting on the oven burner.) ETA: Apparently you’d heal back to full just by using your computer, which is only handy if it doesn’t break. As for the perks I’d want, Skype for certain, because I have wanted telekinesis for as long as I’ve known what it was. Mindreading/telepathy/weak mind control meh, I can use them or ignore them as needed; I just want telekinesis. For a second one, I guess I’ll take The Mall. It would utterly eliminate concerns about buying things before they go out of print and quadruple in price on the secondary market, and I wouldn’t have to worry about being inattentive and missing things entirely. Plus the no taxes or interest would be great. Hmm, wonder if I can buy a house through this? The mortgage terms would be nice…and I wasn’t planning on selling my next residence anyway. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2020, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-2-perks-would-you-choose-from-this-list/922285/16 "2020-10-06T18:38:40Z")
E Tank and GodTube ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2020, 10:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-2-perks-would-you-choose-from-this-list/922285/17 "2020-10-06T22:08:53Z")
Same. The neat thing about GodTube is that you can get a video of _anything_ that happened. Imagine how many politicians you could severely inconvenience by “leaking” recordings of certain events… ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2020, 12:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-2-perks-would-you-choose-from-this-list/922285/18 "2020-10-07T00:08:24Z")
> [@Gyrate](#): > > The neat thing about GodTube is that you can get a video of _anything_ that happened. Imagine how many politicians you could severely inconvenience by “leaking” recordings of certain events… Personally, I was thinking more about the celebrity porn aspect. ---
**Author:** ![Dark\_Sponge](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dark_sponge/32/121_2.png) [@Dark\_Sponge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dark_Sponge)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2020, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-2-perks-would-you-choose-from-this-list/922285/19 "2020-10-07T00:13:02Z")
Skype and E Tank. If I was a Jedi I’d be a consular. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2020, 6:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-2-perks-would-you-choose-from-this-list/922285/20 "2020-10-07T06:58:11Z")
> [@Little\_Nemo](#): > > Personally, I was thinking more about the celebrity porn aspect. I considered it, but tbh that would wear thin pretty quickly whereas, say, Trump’s secret meetings with Putin could provide weeks of entertainment. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-2-perks-would-you-choose-from-this-list/922285.md?page=2)