# Which dead celebrity would you most like to have boinked? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [May 2, 2003, 2:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-dead-celebrity-would-you-most-like-to-have-boinked/172628 "2003-05-02T14:44:20Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 2:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-dead-celebrity-would-you-most-like-to-have-boinked/172628/1 "2003-05-02T14:44:20Z")
While that prson was still a _live_ celebrity, of course… I’d really like to have had carnal knowledge of Jayne Mansfield, Audrey Hepburn, and Sharon Tate. ---
**Author:** ![Fluffy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Fluffy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fluffy)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 3:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-dead-celebrity-would-you-most-like-to-have-boinked/172628/2 "2003-05-02T15:02:37Z")
I would have to say JFK Jr. WIthout a doubt! ---
**Author:** ![Cisco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ccd318/32.png) [@Cisco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cisco)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-dead-celebrity-would-you-most-like-to-have-boinked/172628/3 "2003-05-02T15:04:03Z")
Aaliyah. No question about that. ---
**Author:** ![Michael\_Ellis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/977dab/32.png) [@Michael\_Ellis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Michael_Ellis)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 3:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-dead-celebrity-would-you-most-like-to-have-boinked/172628/4 "2003-05-02T15:05:52Z")
Audrey Hepburn, although “boinked” is hardly the term I would use in her case. ---
**Author:** ![Bibliovore](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7ba0ec/32.png) [@Bibliovore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bibliovore)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 3:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-dead-celebrity-would-you-most-like-to-have-boinked/172628/5 "2003-05-02T15:08:02Z")
Easy - Grace Kelly. I first saw her in Hitchcock’s “Rear Window” with Jimmy Stewart less than a year ago, and I thought she was stunning. Sexy, elegant and feminine, in a way that you just don’t see nowadays. Oh, and I’m 27 by the way, not some nostalgic old-timer. ---
**Author:** ![Ivar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/51bf81/32.png) [@Ivar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ivar)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 3:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-dead-celebrity-would-you-most-like-to-have-boinked/172628/6 "2003-05-02T15:08:51Z")
Breakfast at Tiffany’s era Audrey Hepburn. ---
**Author:** ![Kilt-wearin\_man](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/82dd89/32.png) [@Kilt-wearin\_man](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kilt-wearin_man)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-dead-celebrity-would-you-most-like-to-have-boinked/172628/7 "2003-05-02T15:10:37Z")
Ingrid Bergman. Right after she finished filming _Casablanca_. ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 3:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-dead-celebrity-would-you-most-like-to-have-boinked/172628/8 "2003-05-02T15:25:46Z")
Hmmmm . . . Errol Flynn, c1940 . . . John Barrymore, c1920 . . . Jimmy Cagney, c1932 . . . ---
**Author:** ![Anamorphic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/anamorphic/32/3057_2.png) [@Anamorphic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anamorphic)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-dead-celebrity-would-you-most-like-to-have-boinked/172628/9 "2003-05-02T15:27:58Z")
I personally would’ve loved to have been the meat in an Ingrid Bergman - Veronica Lake sandwich. ---
**Author:** ![Earl\_Snake-Hips\_Tucker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/earl_snake-hips_tucker/32/3269_2.png) [@Earl\_Snake-Hips\_Tucker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Earl_Snake-Hips_Tucker)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-dead-celebrity-would-you-most-like-to-have-boinked/172628/10 "2003-05-02T15:29:31Z")
Ava Gardner The mind reels. . . . ---
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-dead-celebrity-would-you-most-like-to-have-boinked/172628/11 "2003-05-02T15:30:08Z")
Grace Kelly or Marylin Monroe. Probably Grace, though with her it would be making love, not boinking. ---
**Author:** ![Dewey\_Cheatem\_Undhow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/13edae/32.png) [@Dewey\_Cheatem\_Undhow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Cheatem_Undhow)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 3:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-dead-celebrity-would-you-most-like-to-have-boinked/172628/12 "2003-05-02T15:39:05Z")
Depends on the basis for the opinion. If it’s “who is so smoking hot that you’d want to boink them,” I agree with Grace Kelly. If it’s “who has a reputation for freaky bedroom gymnastics,” then Mae West. Let’s face it, you’re more likely to get a finger in your ass at some point in the evening from Mae than from Grace. ---
**Author:** ![Dr\_John\_of\_Babylon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/7c8e57/32.png) [@Dr\_John\_of\_Babylon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr_John_of_Babylon)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 3:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-dead-celebrity-would-you-most-like-to-have-boinked/172628/13 "2003-05-02T15:39:35Z")
Greer Garson in “Mrs Miniver” Wendy Barrie in any number of B-movie roles Janis Joplin ---
**Author:** ![DeVena](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/dec6dc/32.png) [@DeVena](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DeVena)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-dead-celebrity-would-you-most-like-to-have-boinked/172628/14 "2003-05-02T16:08:02Z")
Tyrone Power The man was ungodly beautiful. ---
**Author:** ![etv78](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/d78d45/32.png) [@etv78](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/etv78)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 4:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-dead-celebrity-would-you-most-like-to-have-boinked/172628/15 "2003-05-02T16:51:09Z")
Have old “People 25th anniversary” edition. Showed old pic of Bette Davis. She was HOT!! ---
**Author:** ![TigoleBitties](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cab0a1/32.png) [@TigoleBitties](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TigoleBitties)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-dead-celebrity-would-you-most-like-to-have-boinked/172628/16 "2003-05-02T17:05:03Z")
Another for Grace Kelly. Man was she ultra steamin hot in her time. For still alive ones, **Tura Santana** in her heyday from Russ Meyer’s _Faster Pussycat Kill Kill_. From what Russ has said, she truly was a sex kitten. He accounts that he actually put a assistant to keep her on a time schedule to be ‘fresh’ for the next days shooting (ie make her go to bed at a reasonable time). Turns out she was taking the assistant to bed so much he was showing up utterly zombied the next day from the long bouts of love. “She wore the guy completely out” quoted Russ. For that bod and the face, I would be up to the challenge. And yes ‘boink’ fits perfectly here, though in Tura’s case, its **BOINK!** ---
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-dead-celebrity-would-you-most-like-to-have-boinked/172628/17 "2003-05-02T17:30:19Z")
I should have included in my first post that I would also like to have done filthy things with Jane Russell, Donna Reed, Lucille Ball, and Natalie Wood. ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-dead-celebrity-would-you-most-like-to-have-boinked/172628/18 "2003-05-02T17:32:15Z")
The White Christmas-era Vera Ellen (Danny Kaye’s character’s girlfriend). ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-dead-celebrity-would-you-most-like-to-have-boinked/172628/19 "2003-05-02T18:41:30Z")
Ummm, \*\*Scumpup[/b, Jane Russell is still alive and well . . . Ya want I should give her your number? ---
**Author:** ![Eman\_Bruin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/eb9ed0/32.png) [@Eman\_Bruin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eman_Bruin)\ **Post date:** [May 2, 2003, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-dead-celebrity-would-you-most-like-to-have-boinked/172628/20 "2003-05-02T18:44:24Z")
Oh this is easy. I would’ve hooked up with Grace Kelly. And I see I’m not alone in my thinking. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-dead-celebrity-would-you-most-like-to-have-boinked/172628.md?page=2)