# Which Doper did it? : The Game **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 22, 2005, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-doper-did-it-the-game/295757 "2005-03-22T19:12:12Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![Scott\_Plaid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/258eb7/32.png) [@Scott\_Plaid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scott_Plaid)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2005, 2:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-doper-did-it-the-game/295757/141 "2005-03-25T02:38:27Z")
This one is another easy to get one, but is also quite sick, so I am putting it in a spoiler box. Yeah chief, we found his dog. It has been carved up into small cubes, each topped with a tootpick, next to a bowl of BBQ sauce. As you can see, he left a sign offering free samples. ---
**Author:** ![FaerieBeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e95f7d/32.png) [@FaerieBeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FaerieBeth)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2005, 2:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-doper-did-it-the-game/295757/142 "2005-03-25T02:55:28Z")
> [@Scott\_plaid](#): > > This one is another easy to get one, but is also quite sick, so I am putting it in a spoiler box. > > Yeah chief, we found his dog. It has been carved up into small cubes, each topped with a tootpick, next to a bowl of BBQ sauce. As you can see, he left a sign offering free samples. Would you like to **Sample\_the\_Dog** , sir? It’s quite good… ---
**Author:** ![ioioio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ioioio/32/316_2.png) [@ioioio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ioioio)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2005, 3:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-doper-did-it-the-game/295757/143 "2005-03-25T03:03:25Z")
Hmmmmm… . . **FaerieBeth** is hanging around. Perhaps she feels guilty about something? ---
**Author:** ![JThunder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e95f7d/32.png) [@JThunder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JThunder)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2005, 4:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-doper-did-it-the-game/295757/144 "2005-03-25T04:13:51Z")
The investigators reported that their prime suspect appeared to have been torn off of a bicycle tire. ---
**Author:** ![Sternvogel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Sternvogel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sternvogel)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2005, 4:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-doper-did-it-the-game/295757/145 "2005-03-25T04:59:28Z")
> [@Wile E](#): > > _Adds **Susie Derkins** to the APB_ > > I like Sternvogel’s clues! Well, naturally, since you get them right! ( **Sample** , if there is a poster named **Calvin’s Mom** , I’m not aware of her.) Strangest thing – we got surveillance camera footage, time-stamped 9:35 a.m., of this guy wearing a green shirt and blue jeans. However, in a cellphone picture taken by the victim at 9:36 a.m., the perp’s sporting a red sweatsuit! ---
**Author:** ![Sample\_the\_Dog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8797f3/32.png) [@Sample\_the\_Dog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sample_the_Dog)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2005, 5:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-doper-did-it-the-game/295757/146 "2005-03-25T05:05:30Z")
> [@Sternvogel](#): > > **Sample** , if there is a poster named **Calvin’s Mom** , I’m not aware of her. Sorry, wrong venue. My batting average is pretty poor on this thread! :smack: ---
**Author:** ![Monstre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e274bd/32.png) [@Monstre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monstre)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2005, 5:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-doper-did-it-the-game/295757/147 "2005-03-25T05:11:58Z")
> [@duffer](#): > > > [@](#): > > > > Clue (monstre): The detective, inspecting the crime scene, suddenly realized that it was staged – no crime had actually occurred at all. > > F U Shakespear? Sorry. Not even close. 🙂 (But I see it’s a good guess based on “staged”). Although I could also say that the perpetrator had simply manufactured the crime scene, to fake a capital offense. ---
**Author:** ![Only\_Mostly\_Dead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/f19dbf/32.png) [@Only\_Mostly\_Dead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Only_Mostly_Dead)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2005, 5:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-doper-did-it-the-game/295757/148 "2005-03-25T05:30:52Z")
> [@Flander](#): > > Clue: “The only evidence was a drawing that looked like :eek: and a copy of **Office Space** on DVD.” Police suspect the killer gets sexual gratification out of the act, causing him to show his **Oh Face**. whatevernewnumber: The top suspect in the newest murder disappeared from the heart of the police presence yesterday. His daughter is being interviewed as to his whereabouts. ---
**Author:** ![Go\_You\_Big\_Red\_Fire\_Engine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/eada6e/32.png) [@Go\_You\_Big\_Red\_Fire\_Engine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Go_You_Big_Red_Fire_Engine)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2005, 5:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-doper-did-it-the-game/295757/149 "2005-03-25T05:49:13Z")
Engine Clue #1) The victim was found papier machéd to death, with definite man footprints leading away from the scene. Engine Clue #2) Swedish by nature, she could only count in numbers where their modulo 2 was 0. ---
**Author:** ![Sample\_the\_Dog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8797f3/32.png) [@Sample\_the\_Dog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sample_the_Dog)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2005, 5:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-doper-did-it-the-game/295757/150 "2005-03-25T05:59:31Z")
> [@Monstre](#): > > I could also say that the perpetrator had simply manufactured the crime scene, to fake a capital offense. [Death Cinematics](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/member.php)? A zero-poster, but a Doper nonetheless! So I takes my freebie! Scene 3.14: Law enforcement were shocked to discover that the killer was not only an amateur sleuth, but also a man of the cloth. ---
**Author:** ![Sample\_the\_Dog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8797f3/32.png) [@Sample\_the\_Dog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sample_the_Dog)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2005, 6:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-doper-did-it-the-game/295757/151 "2005-03-25T06:09:51Z")
> [@Go You Big Red Fire Engine](#): > > Engine Clue #2) Swedish by nature, she could only count in numbers where their modulo 2 was 0. **Even Sven**? ---
**Author:** ![Monstre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e274bd/32.png) [@Monstre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monstre)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2005, 6:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-doper-did-it-the-game/295757/152 "2005-03-25T06:30:30Z")
> [@Sample\_the\_Dog](#): > > > [@](#): > > > > Originally Posted by Monstre > > I could also say that the perpetrator had simply manufactured the crime scene, to fake a capital offense. > > [Death Cinematics](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/member.php)? A zero-poster, but a Doper nonetheless! Nope. The crime scene was staged, it was a fake, a hoax, a deception, a forgery, almost a parody of a real crime. (And quite the opposite of a zero-poster…) ---
**Author:** ![Go\_You\_Big\_Red\_Fire\_Engine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/eada6e/32.png) [@Go\_You\_Big\_Red\_Fire\_Engine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Go_You_Big_Red_Fire_Engine)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2005, 6:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-doper-did-it-the-game/295757/153 "2005-03-25T06:33:48Z")
> [@Sample\_the\_Dog](#): > > **Even Sven**? Yup. I think I made mine too easy 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Monstre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e274bd/32.png) [@Monstre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monstre)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2005, 6:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-doper-did-it-the-game/295757/154 "2005-03-25T06:43:25Z")
New clue (#54321): Large animal tracks led away from the scene of the bank robbery, but investigators discovered that only $200 was taken. ---
**Author:** ![picker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/picker/32/13969_2.png) [@picker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/picker)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2005, 7:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-doper-did-it-the-game/295757/155 "2005-03-25T07:27:03Z")
> [@](#): > > Scene 3.14: Law enforcement were shocked to discover that the killer was not only an amateur sleuth, but also a man of the cloth. **Brother Cadfael** Clue: there were reports from the neighbors that the perpetrator broke into the victim’s house, raided the liquor closet and proceeded to ride the victim’s dog around in the pasture until it collapsed ---
**Author:** ![Othersider](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/cab0a1/32.png) [@Othersider](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Othersider)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2005, 8:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-doper-did-it-the-game/295757/156 "2005-03-25T08:12:31Z")
> [@Othersider](#): > > > [@Kythereia](#): > > > > Immediately following the murder, witnesses report hearing several loud blasts from a brass wind instrument. > > Could this be **TubaDiva**? Silly me, I forgot to post one. Clue #2517: A witness who saw the crime from hiding said he saw a large black man reciting bible verses before enacting his vengeance. ---
**Author:** ![Go\_You\_Big\_Red\_Fire\_Engine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/eada6e/32.png) [@Go\_You\_Big\_Red\_Fire\_Engine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Go_You_Big_Red_Fire_Engine)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2005, 11:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-doper-did-it-the-game/295757/157 "2005-03-25T11:46:55Z")
Engine Clue #3) The police looked for clues, but all they could find was a Cranial Nerve X. ---
**Author:** ![Sample\_the\_Dog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8797f3/32.png) [@Sample\_the\_Dog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sample_the_Dog)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2005, 1:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-doper-did-it-the-game/295757/158 "2005-03-25T13:19:59Z")
> [@monstre](#): > > A more thorough search of the scene revealed that it had definitely been staged to look like a capital crime **SPOOFE** done it! The crime scene investigator didn’t know quite how he was going to explain this one to the chief… but he was certain the perpetrator had smashed her victim with a piece of fruit the size of a Volkswagen! ---
**Author:** ![Sample\_the\_Dog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8797f3/32.png) [@Sample\_the\_Dog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sample_the_Dog)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2005, 1:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-doper-did-it-the-game/295757/159 "2005-03-25T13:32:01Z")
> [@Misnomer](#): > > Clue: The investigators had to hurry and follow the trail of orange crumbs before the mice ate all of them… **cheezit**? ---
**Author:** ![FaerieBeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e95f7d/32.png) [@FaerieBeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FaerieBeth)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2005, 1:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-doper-did-it-the-game/295757/160 "2005-03-25T13:52:20Z")
> [@laina\_f](#): > > Hmmmmm… . . **FaerieBeth** is hanging around. Perhaps she feels guilty about something? No, no…what on earth would I have to feel guilty about? :: innocent, bewildered expression :: Do I get some sort of prize if I get away with it? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-doper-did-it-the-game/295757.md?page=7) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-doper-did-it-the-game/295757.md?page=9)