# Which of the two Coreys would you kill first (and why)? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [June 26, 2008, 2:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-of-the-two-coreys-would-you-kill-first-and-why/454268 "2008-06-26T02:34:30Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 9\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Moirai](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/96bed5/32.png) [@Moirai](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moirai)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2008, 1:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-of-the-two-coreys-would-you-kill-first-and-why/454268/21 "2008-07-18T01:29:37Z")
[QUOTE=Phlosphr] Feldman was \*\*Mouth \*\* in the Goonies and \*\*Teddy \*\* in Stand By Me. Anyone who was interested in the 80’s won’t choose Feldman over Haim. Those movies rocked ! [/QUOTE] No shit. I damn near cried watching Feldman crying at the fence, “My dad stormed the beach at Normandy, you piece of shit!” while his friends held him. ---
**Author:** ![greatshakes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/58956e/32.png) [@greatshakes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/greatshakes)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2008, 3:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-of-the-two-coreys-would-you-kill-first-and-why/454268/22 "2008-07-18T03:43:30Z")
The answer is simple. The first one you see when you have a gun in your possession. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2008, 3:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-of-the-two-coreys-would-you-kill-first-and-why/454268/23 "2008-07-18T03:49:05Z")
We have to nuke them from orbit. It’s the only way to be sure. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2008, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-of-the-two-coreys-would-you-kill-first-and-why/454268/24 "2008-07-18T15:44:35Z")
[QUOTE=Sampiro] What is so addictive about show biz, I wonder, that even when- like Haim especially- but Feldman to an extent, or Screech, or a thousand others- you’ve been completely spit out of it (Haim was so broke he was living with druggie friends and trying to sell his pulled teeth on ebay) you will not even _consider_ anything else? You’d think that becoming, say, a car salesman/real estate agent (careers that don’t require 12 years of college and where your former fame might help) or even a good waiter would seem monumental steps up, financially and in terms of self-respect, from being famous for being a fucked up has-been. In the long haul they’d probably pay a lot more as well (true, I’m sure Haim is making more from _Two Coreys_ than most care salesmen or dental hygienists, but in all likelihood in a year or two he’ll be dead broke again with no income while folks with “regular” jobs are paying their rent/mortgage just fine. [/QUOTE] I don’t get this, either. Are these people so sheltered from ever needing to become fully realized grown-ups that they never get it? And even once the chickens come home to roost, it’s too late and they can’t make the adjustments to becoming real people? If I was a sociologist, I would want to write papers on the whole idea of stardom and all its attendant fallout, it fascinates me so. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Fight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/90ced4/32.png) [@Cat\_Fight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Fight)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2008, 4:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-of-the-two-coreys-would-you-kill-first-and-why/454268/25 "2008-07-18T16:51:27Z")
[QUOTE=Sampiro] You’d think that becoming, say, a car salesman/real estate agent (careers that don’t require 12 years of college and **where your former fame might help** ) or even a good waiter would seem monumental steps up [/QUOTE] (bolding mine) I don’t know about that. Can you imagine working in a job and constantly getting “Hey, didn’t you used to be famous?” every day? Spending more time answering questions about _The Lost Boys_ than doing your job (likely to the boss’s chagrin)? I’m not even sure the Coreys have GEDs, let alone the social skills to function outside Hollywood. Plus there are producers and others in their circles who know there’s a buck to be made off them. Not that there aren’t plenty of child stars who go on to be everyday people… you just don’t hear about them. ---
**Author:** ![DoctorJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctorj/32/2904_2.png) [@DoctorJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DoctorJ)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2008, 3:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-of-the-two-coreys-would-you-kill-first-and-why/454268/26 "2008-07-19T03:01:14Z")
I don’t think it really matters. If you kill one of them, I’m pretty sure the other one dies almost immediately thereafter. ---
**Author:** ![Rilchiam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@Rilchiam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rilchiam)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2008, 3:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-of-the-two-coreys-would-you-kill-first-and-why/454268/27 "2008-07-19T03:21:24Z")
[QUOTE=EJsGirl] No shit. I damn near cried watching Feldman crying at the fence, “My dad stormed the beach at Normandy, you piece of shit!” while his friends held him. [/QUOTE] Sigh…I honestly thought, at that time, that Feldman would grow up to be a good, solid character actor. I didn’t predict stardom, but I figured he’d work steadily, with small roles in dramatic films bolstered by the occasional, bill-paying, lead or second lead in fluff comedies. So much for that. He had talent, but a lot of people have talent, and it generally comes down to who is the least pain in the ass to work with. ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2008, 4:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-of-the-two-coreys-would-you-kill-first-and-why/454268/28 "2008-07-19T04:09:14Z")
[QUOTE=Cat Fight] I don’t know about that. Can you imagine working in a job and constantly getting “Hey, didn’t you used to be famous?” every day? Spending more time answering questions about _The Lost Boys_ than doing your job (likely to the boss’s chagrin)? [/QUOTE] I’m pretty sure I’d rather deal with that than live on a crackhead’s couch and sell my teeth on Ebay. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2008, 5:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-of-the-two-coreys-would-you-kill-first-and-why/454268/29 "2008-07-19T05:34:39Z")
[QUOTE=Loach] I’m pretty sure I’d rather deal with that than live on a crackhead’s couch and sell my teeth on Ebay. [/QUOTE] So would most normal people - that’s part of why I can’t understand the star mentality. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-of-the-two-coreys-would-you-kill-first-and-why/454268.md?page=1)