# Which Star Trek characters would you off? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [July 9, 2011, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-characters-would-you-off/588380 "2011-07-09T03:17:48Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2011, 4:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-characters-would-you-off/588380/81 "2011-07-12T04:01:11Z")
> [@levdrakon](#): > > Pon Farr every seven years kiddo, not sex every seven years. There is nothing stopping Vulcans from engaging in some full-contact telepathic mind-melded and mind-blowing orgasmic sex whenever they feel like it. But their Vulcans! They never _feel_ like anything! ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2011, 4:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-characters-would-you-off/588380/82 "2011-07-12T04:08:55Z")
> [@3\_plus\_14](#): > > STV: Neelix is a given. Looks like a rainbow trout in a bad leisure suit. I wasn’t fond of his girlfriend either. Oh, I hated her. I’d kill her, but with her species’ short lifespan it wouldn’t be worth the trouble. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2011, 4:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-characters-would-you-off/588380/83 "2011-07-12T04:09:04Z")
> [@RickJay](#): > > The one I don’t get at all is Riker. Why is he there? You LIKED him - he’s dashing, good with the ladies, and generally a likeable guy as played by Jonathan Frakes - but what purpose did he serve, anyway? Riker is the command officer who goes on Away missions. One of the big complaints about TOS was the Command staff placing themselves in danger by beaming all over the place. TNG addressed that complaint by having the Exec handle Away missions instead of the Captain. It was Riker’s job to boff all the hot alien chicks, while Picard remained dispassionate and in control of the situation. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2011, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-characters-would-you-off/588380/84 "2011-07-12T22:24:02Z")
> [@silenus](#): > > Riker is the command officer who goes on Away missions. He also causes Picard to appear fit and trim. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2011, 10:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-characters-would-you-off/588380/85 "2011-07-12T22:36:23Z")
He tilts his head real nice. ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2011, 10:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-characters-would-you-off/588380/86 "2011-07-12T22:38:25Z")
> [@Face\_Intentionally\_Left\_Blank](#): > > And NO, you MAY NOT kill Subcommander Eyecandy! What the hell are you thinking? Some people might object to her because she put Obama in the White House. Smart money was on her ex, but the divorce docs were released in which she claimed he tried to get her to have public sex in some Parisian sex show place he had to drop out and was replaced by Alan Keyes. With the prudes, who were against such conduct, and the Trekkies, who were disappointed he had failed and didn’t have video, against him Jack Ryan didn’t stand a chance. ---
**Author:** ![Raguleader](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/258eb7/32.png) [@Raguleader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Raguleader)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2011, 10:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-characters-would-you-off/588380/87 "2011-07-12T22:49:23Z")
> [@RickJay](#): > > The one I don’t get at all is Riker. Why is he there? You LIKED him - he’s dashing, good with the ladies, and generally a likeable guy as played by Jonathan Frakes - but what purpose did he serve, anyway? He’s similar to Dax on DS9, in that he’s a symbiote with the show’s most important character: Riker’s Beard. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![BunnyTVS](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@BunnyTVS](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BunnyTVS)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2011, 11:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-characters-would-you-off/588380/88 "2011-07-12T23:07:27Z")
> [@dropzone](#): > > Some people might object to her because she put Obama in the White House. Smart money was on her ex, but the divorce docs were released in which she claimed he tried to get her to have public sex in some Parisian sex show place he had to drop out and was replaced by Alan Keyes. With the prudes, who were against such conduct, and the Trekkies, who were disappointed he had failed and didn’t have video, against him Jack Ryan didn’t stand a chance. I believe Face was referring to T’Pol on ENT, not Seven on Voyager. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2011, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-characters-would-you-off/588380/89 "2011-07-12T23:14:22Z")
> [@BunnyTVS](#): > > I believe Face was referring to T’Pol on ENT, not Seven on Voyager. It is very easy to be confused. ---
**Author:** ![akrako1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c77e96/32.png) [@akrako1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/akrako1)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2011, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-characters-would-you-off/588380/90 "2011-07-14T16:16:41Z")
> [@UncleRojelio](#): > > Whosoever thought that the theme song for _Enterprise_ sounded good. A slow painful death would be preferred. Agreed! Definitely the worst theme of any Trek show, possibly any show period! ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Excellent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f19dbf/32.png) [@Mr.Excellent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Excellent)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2011, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-characters-would-you-off/588380/91 "2011-07-14T16:28:30Z")
> [@UncleRojelio](#): > > Whosoever thought that the theme song for _Enterprise_ sounded good. A slow painful death would be preferred. On the other hand, the theme music for the mirror universe episodes was absurdly great. I suppose that a full season of the Terran Empire kicking ass and taking names might have gotten old. Eventually. But I’d have been willing to chance it! ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2011, 4:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-characters-would-you-off/588380/92 "2011-07-14T16:37:25Z")
> [@Mr.Excellent](#): > > On the other hand, the theme music for the mirror universe episodes was absurdly great. I suppose that a full season of the Terran Empire kicking ass and taking names might have gotten old. Eventually. But I’d have been willing to chance it! Especially Empress Hoshi and her slave girl hand maidens… ---
**Author:** ![Enderw24](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ba9def/32.png) [@Enderw24](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enderw24)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2011, 4:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-characters-would-you-off/588380/93 "2011-07-14T16:41:11Z")
TOS: Checkov TNG: Rasmussen, Berlinghoff Ent: Michael Rostov DS9: Anastasia Komononov ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2011, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-characters-would-you-off/588380/94 "2011-07-14T20:26:44Z")
> [@Enderw24](#): > > TOS: Checkov > TNG: Rasmussen, Berlinghoff > Ent: Michael Rostov > DS9: Anastasia Komononov In Fedewration wRussia, Trek characters off you! ---
**Author:** ![pancakes3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ba9def/32.png) [@pancakes3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pancakes3)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-characters-would-you-off/588380/95 "2011-07-15T03:17:51Z")
> [@A Monkey With a Gun](#): > > [EMH mark II](http://memory-alpha.org/wiki/Emergency_Medical_Holographic_program) a pox upon your house. ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 3:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-characters-would-you-off/588380/96 "2011-07-15T03:49:01Z")
> [@BunnyTVS](#): > > I believe Face was referring to T’Pol on ENT, not Seven on Voyager. She was quite terribly hot in a Mick Jagger way, but I preferred the young T’Pau. Yeah, it’s sexist, but neither show had a lot to recommend it beyond eye candy. ---
**Author:** ![ministryman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f6c823/32.png) [@ministryman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ministryman)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 2:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-characters-would-you-off/588380/97 "2011-07-15T14:09:19Z")
> [@Apollon](#): > > The entire DS9 crew. Except for Dax…mmmmmmmmmm 😉 ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 3:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-characters-would-you-off/588380/98 "2011-07-15T15:15:15Z")
> [@Shakes](#): > > NG: That doctor who replaced Crusher. Yeah, I kept wishing that she’d just fall down an elevator shaft. ---
**Author:** ![Hogfather65](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/7bcc69/32.png) [@Hogfather65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hogfather65)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-characters-would-you-off/588380/99 "2011-07-15T15:29:48Z")
OS: Yeoman Janice Rand. NG: Wesley and Troi. DS9: Jake Sisco. STV: Nelix. STE: Malcolm Reed. ---
**Author:** ![Hogfather65](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/7bcc69/32.png) [@Hogfather65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hogfather65)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2011, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-characters-would-you-off/588380/100 "2011-07-15T15:33:14Z")
> [@Recovering\_Republican](#): > > Hmmm- > > OS- Chekov. He was annoying. (I actualy like Walter Koenig as an actor in other things like Babylon 5)… Bester Rules - one of his better parts - could watch him in that roll all the time [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-characters-would-you-off/588380.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-characters-would-you-off/588380.md?page=6)