# Which Star Trek species would you do first? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [June 10, 2003, 11:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-species-would-you-do-first/180832 "2003-06-10T11:32:23Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2003, 11:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-species-would-you-do-first/180832/1 "2003-06-10T11:32:23Z")
OK I’m purposely putting only the fugly ones becuase the ones like Vulcans and what not are too easy a choice. Now if someone held a gun up to your head and said you had to choose from one of these which would it be? A Klingon? (full blooded) A Ferengi? An Antarian? (excuse the spelling if I screwed any of them up.) Myself from the three I’d probably have to go with (oh god please help me) a Klingon. ---
**Author:** ![Porus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/54ee81/32.png) [@Porus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Porus)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2003, 12:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-species-would-you-do-first/180832/2 "2003-06-10T12:03:21Z")
Lursa and Bator (sp?) I wouldn’t need a gun to my head I would die a happy man ---
**Author:** ![Gorgon\_Heap](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/f475e1/32.png) [@Gorgon\_Heap](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gorgon_Heap)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2003, 12:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-species-would-you-do-first/180832/3 "2003-06-10T12:05:16Z")
Gotta admire the Klingon’s dress style, too. And they like it rough. ---
**Author:** ![Whack-a-Mole](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/whack-a-mole/32/141_2.png) [@Whack-a-Mole](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Whack-a-Mole)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2003, 12:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-species-would-you-do-first/180832/4 "2003-06-10T12:53:25Z")
To my knowledge we’ve never seen a Ferengi female…they aren’t allowed aboard their ships. If there are anything like the Ferengi males though then no thanks. As an aside Ferengi females aren’t allowed to wear clothes so maybe they pay better attention to their bodies. I’d have to go with Klingons given my choices. Put a bag on their head and all is good ;). ---
**Author:** ![Gorgon\_Heap](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/f475e1/32.png) [@Gorgon\_Heap](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gorgon_Heap)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2003, 12:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-species-would-you-do-first/180832/5 "2003-06-10T12:56:26Z")
Actually, **Whack-a-Mole** , there was an episode of DS9 about a female Ferengi who was posing as a male so she could travel. ---
**Author:** ![Whack-a-Mole](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/whack-a-mole/32/141_2.png) [@Whack-a-Mole](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Whack-a-Mole)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2003, 12:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-species-would-you-do-first/180832/6 "2003-06-10T12:59:30Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Gorgon Heap \* > \*\*Actually, **Whack-a-Mole** , there was an episode of DS9 about a female Ferengi who was posing as a male so she could travel. \*\* Hmmm…missed that one. How’d she look? (Assuming you you get to see her as a female and not and only as a female trying to look like a guy.) ---
**Author:** ![Gorgon\_Heap](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/f475e1/32.png) [@Gorgon\_Heap](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gorgon_Heap)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2003, 1:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-species-would-you-do-first/180832/7 "2003-06-10T13:10:37Z")
Like a Ferengi with smaller ears. Sorry, man, that’s it. ---
**Author:** ![Steve\_Wright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@Steve\_Wright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steve_Wright)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2003, 1:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-species-would-you-do-first/180832/8 "2003-06-10T13:24:46Z")
Several of the later Ferengi-women’s-lib episodes of DS9 involved Quark’s mother. Who was not, in all honesty, a pretty sight. ---
**Author:** ![Whack-a-Mole](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/whack-a-mole/32/141_2.png) [@Whack-a-Mole](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Whack-a-Mole)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2003, 1:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-species-would-you-do-first/180832/9 "2003-06-10T13:29:30Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Steve Wright \* > \*\*Several of the later Ferengi-women’s-lib episodes of DS9 involved Quark’s mother. Who was not, in all honesty, a pretty sight. \*\* Mother Quark…scary thought. Scarier still…was she naked? I seem to recall in ST:TNG the first time humans met ferengi the ferengi were appalled that we allow our women clothes. ---
**Author:** ![Gorgon\_Heap](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/f475e1/32.png) [@Gorgon\_Heap](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gorgon_Heap)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2003, 1:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-species-would-you-do-first/180832/10 "2003-06-10T13:54:56Z")
You’re right, **Whack-a-Mole**. In retrospect, I think they are on to something. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Angua](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8baadc/32.png) [@Angua](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Angua)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2003, 2:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-species-would-you-do-first/180832/11 "2003-06-10T14:07:03Z")
A Klingon. Rrrooowwr. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2003, 2:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-species-would-you-do-first/180832/12 "2003-06-10T14:17:51Z")
Caitains [Lt. M’ress](http://www.startrekanimated.com/tas_a01_01.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![Earl\_Snake-Hips\_Tucker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/earl_snake-hips_tucker/32/3269_2.png) [@Earl\_Snake-Hips\_Tucker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Earl_Snake-Hips_Tucker)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2003, 2:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-species-would-you-do-first/180832/13 "2003-06-10T14:21:54Z")
Nona the Kanutu from TOS “A Private Little War.” Nancy Kovack. 'Nuff said. ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2003, 2:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-species-would-you-do-first/180832/14 "2003-06-10T14:54:11Z")
They showed parts of Quark and Rom’s mom naked. Played by Andrea Martin, from Second City TV. Yikes almighty. What is this Antarian of which you speak? Can you name the episode they showed up? Are you thinking of Andorians, the blue-skinned guys with antlers? I’d definitely do one of them… ---
**Author:** ![Kilt-wearin\_man](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/82dd89/32.png) [@Kilt-wearin\_man](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kilt-wearin_man)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2003, 3:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-species-would-you-do-first/180832/15 "2003-06-10T15:38:23Z")
a Klingon. Grillka, specifically. Yowza. [http://www.startrek.com/library/media\_DS9.asp?id=110947](http://www.startrek.com/library/media_DS9.asp?id=110947) ---
**Author:** ![Wolfian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/7ea924/32.png) [@Wolfian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wolfian)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2003, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-species-would-you-do-first/180832/16 "2003-06-10T16:34:09Z")
Damn! My first thought when I saw this thread was, “Vulcan. Five hundred years\* of pent-up sexual energy released at once. No brainer.” I guess Klingon me. \*Is it five hundred? I know they have long life spans, but that seems a bit off. ---
**Author:** ![WordMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e8c25b/32.png) [@WordMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WordMan)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2003, 4:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-species-would-you-do-first/180832/17 "2003-06-10T16:40:05Z")
Whatever species it was in the TNG episode “the Perfect Mate” - cheesy episode, but the concept of a mate that adapts to perfectly complements my needs sounds pretty good to me, especially if she looks like [Famke Janssen](http://us.imdb.com/Name?Janssen,+Famke), who I first saw in that ep and is now playing Jean Grey in X2… ---
**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2003, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-species-would-you-do-first/180832/18 "2003-06-10T16:44:16Z")
Borg, all that BDSM gear and built in ‘toys’. Now if only the Borg would assymnilate the Tribbles, think of all that sexual psychie released into the hive mind. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Calculus\_of\_Logic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/aeb1de/32.png) [@The\_Calculus\_of\_Logic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Calculus_of_Logic)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2003, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-species-would-you-do-first/180832/19 "2003-06-10T16:54:17Z")
Betazoid, their telepathy would probably make the experience better. I’d choose android if i could because you can program them to do certain things. ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [June 10, 2003, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-species-would-you-do-first/180832/20 "2003-06-10T17:02:32Z")
Some people are not getting into the spirit of the OP. Try to pick a race that doesn’t look like fashion models with brown spots painted on their foreheads. Otherwise, I would have picked any women from the Planet of Scantily Clad Jogging Aerobic Instructors. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/which-star-trek-species-would-you-do-first/180832.md?page=2)