# White females, are you threatened by men of color in social situations? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [December 14, 2010, 11:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-females-are-you-threatened-by-men-of-color-in-social-situations/564177 "2010-12-14T23:34:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![ZPG\_Zealot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/e47c2d/32.png) [@ZPG\_Zealot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZPG_Zealot)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2010, 3:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-females-are-you-threatened-by-men-of-color-in-social-situations/564177/21 "2010-12-15T03:03:49Z")
> [@rachelellogram](#): > > Why? In Roma culture there’s no such thing as dating for the sake of dating. Men and women met and socialize to determine if they want to get married. A man who doesn’t share my culture, language or faith is automatically not acceptable to me as a marriage partner and anyone who has known me for more than a few minutes knows that about me. An unacceptable man who approaches me is knowingly going where he knows he is not welcomed or wanted. He is asking to be insulted and has no right to complain if he is. ---
**Author:** ![Peeta\_Mellark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/bc8723/32.png) [@Peeta\_Mellark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peeta_Mellark)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2010, 3:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-females-are-you-threatened-by-men-of-color-in-social-situations/564177/22 "2010-12-15T03:16:31Z")
> [@ZPG\_Zealot](#): > > In Roma culture there’s no such thing as dating for the sake of dating. Men and women met and socialize to determine if they want to get married. A man who doesn’t share my culture, language or faith is automatically not acceptable to me as a marriage partner and anyone who has known me for more than a few minutes knows that about me. An unacceptable man who approaches me is knowingly going where he knows he is not welcomed or wanted. He is asking to be insulted and has no right to complain if he is. Since the OP is about seeing strangers in a pub, and so by definition they do not know you, are we to infer you wear a little tag on your person that states “I am Roma and will not ‘date’ you”? ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Borgia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/larry_borgia/32/156_2.png) [@Larry\_Borgia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Borgia)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2010, 3:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-females-are-you-threatened-by-men-of-color-in-social-situations/564177/23 "2010-12-15T03:23:20Z")
> [@ZPG\_Zealot](#): > > In Roma culture there’s no such thing as dating for the sake of dating. Men and women met and socialize to determine if they want to get married. A man who doesn’t share my culture, language or faith is automatically not acceptable to me as a marriage partner and anyone who has known me for more than a few minutes knows that about me. An unacceptable man who approaches me is knowingly going where he knows he is not welcomed or wanted. He is asking to be insulted and has no right to complain if he is. Maybe you shouldn’t go to mixed-gender parties or bars. ---
**Author:** ![CairoCarol](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cairocarol/32/3825_2.png) [@CairoCarol](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CairoCarol)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2010, 3:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-females-are-you-threatened-by-men-of-color-in-social-situations/564177/24 "2010-12-15T03:23:58Z")
> [@ZPG\_Zealot](#): > > However, it makes me very angry when men from other ethnic groups try to flirt with me. . Suddenly, I hear train whistles in the distance. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Borgia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/larry_borgia/32/156_2.png) [@Larry\_Borgia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Borgia)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2010, 3:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-females-are-you-threatened-by-men-of-color-in-social-situations/564177/25 "2010-12-15T03:25:50Z")
> [@CairoCarol](#): > > Suddenly, I hear train whistles in the distance. 😕 ---
**Author:** ![carnut](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnut/32/3531_2.png) [@carnut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnut)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2010, 3:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-females-are-you-threatened-by-men-of-color-in-social-situations/564177/26 "2010-12-15T03:26:44Z")
I only feel threatened by someone who acts threatening (invading my ‘space’) or won’t go away when I let them know I’m not interested. I have had good and bad experiences with men of all colors/backgrounds/nationalities. I don’t go in for stereotyping. ---
**Author:** ![ZPG\_Zealot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/e47c2d/32.png) [@ZPG\_Zealot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZPG_Zealot)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2010, 3:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-females-are-you-threatened-by-men-of-color-in-social-situations/564177/27 "2010-12-15T03:26:52Z")
> [@Peeta\_Mellark](#): > > Since the OP is about seeing strangers in a pub, and so by definition they do not know you, are we to infer you wear a little tag on your person that states “I am Roma and will not ‘date’ you”? If I’m at a pub alone I am not at the bar. I’m sitting at a table out of the way and reading, on my cell, working on my lap top, etc., in other words sending out all the international signals of person who doesn’t want to be bothered by others, so it’s not a little tag. ---
**Author:** ![Koxinga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/4af34b/32.png) [@Koxinga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Koxinga)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2010, 3:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-females-are-you-threatened-by-men-of-color-in-social-situations/564177/28 "2010-12-15T03:29:17Z")
> [@ZPG\_Zealot](#): > > In Roma culture there’s no such thing as dating for the sake of dating. Men and women met and socialize to determine if they want to get married. Suuuure there isn’t. Suuuure they do. I’ll bet you ten dollars that Romani teenagers and twentysomethings are getting busy all the time: you just don’t know it or refuse to see it. ---
**Author:** ![KinkiNipponTourist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e9bcb4/32.png) [@KinkiNipponTourist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KinkiNipponTourist)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2010, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-females-are-you-threatened-by-men-of-color-in-social-situations/564177/29 "2010-12-15T03:30:19Z")
> [@Larry\_Borgia](#): > > 😕 de-railing, perhaps? ---
**Author:** ![Koxinga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/4af34b/32.png) [@Koxinga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Koxinga)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2010, 3:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-females-are-you-threatened-by-men-of-color-in-social-situations/564177/30 "2010-12-15T03:33:29Z")
Is it train whistles or helicopters? Don’t lose your head . . . ---
**Author:** ![ZPG\_Zealot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/e47c2d/32.png) [@ZPG\_Zealot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZPG_Zealot)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2010, 3:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-females-are-you-threatened-by-men-of-color-in-social-situations/564177/31 "2010-12-15T03:34:29Z")
> [@Larry\_Borgia](#): > > Maybe you shouldn’t go to mixed-gender parties or bars. Since when is the only reason to go to a mixed-gender party hooking up with someone of the opposite sex. Many people enjoy non-romantic conversations and non-sexual relationships based on friendship with members of the opposite sex. And a lot of business is conducted in bars. ---
**Author:** ![TruCelt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trucelt/32/523_2.png) [@TruCelt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TruCelt)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2010, 3:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-females-are-you-threatened-by-men-of-color-in-social-situations/564177/32 "2010-12-15T03:35:50Z")
No, no, no, and no, but in the rare instance when I do think that’s what he’s after I find it revolting. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Borgia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/larry_borgia/32/156_2.png) [@Larry\_Borgia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Borgia)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2010, 3:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-females-are-you-threatened-by-men-of-color-in-social-situations/564177/33 "2010-12-15T03:40:35Z")
> [@ZPG\_Zealot](#): > > Since when is the only reason to go to a mixed-gender party hooking up with someone of the opposite sex. Many people enjoy non-romantic conversations and non-sexual relationships based on friendship with members of the opposite sex. And a lot of business is conducted in bars. You know…It’s just not worth it. I’m bailing from the inevitable train wreck. ---
**Author:** ![ZPG\_Zealot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/e47c2d/32.png) [@ZPG\_Zealot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZPG_Zealot)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2010, 3:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-females-are-you-threatened-by-men-of-color-in-social-situations/564177/34 "2010-12-15T03:43:01Z")
> [@Koxinga](#): > > Suuuure there isn’t. Suuuure they do. I’ll bet you ten dollars that Romani teenagers and twentysomethings are getting busy all the time: you just don’t know it or refuse to see it. I am sure it happens, but the ones that marry outside their culture, I wouldn’t bother considering them Roma. ---
**Author:** ![SeaDragonTattoo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df705f/32.png) [@SeaDragonTattoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SeaDragonTattoo)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2010, 3:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-females-are-you-threatened-by-men-of-color-in-social-situations/564177/35 "2010-12-15T03:52:31Z")
OMG. Don’t offer your hand whatever you do. You WILL be struck by lightning. Crap, the train’s going over me now. ---
**Author:** ![pepperlandgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f17d59/32.png) [@pepperlandgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pepperlandgirl)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2010, 3:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-females-are-you-threatened-by-men-of-color-in-social-situations/564177/36 "2010-12-15T03:53:39Z")
> [@ZPG\_Zealot](#): > > I am sure it happens, but the ones that marry outside their culture, I wouldn’t bother considering them Roma. Classic. ---
**Author:** ![Peeta\_Mellark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/bc8723/32.png) [@Peeta\_Mellark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peeta_Mellark)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2010, 4:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-females-are-you-threatened-by-men-of-color-in-social-situations/564177/37 "2010-12-15T04:08:47Z")
Ah, the no true Roma fallacy. Soooo, anyway. How about them Indians in those pubs, huh? ---
**Author:** ![Koxinga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/4af34b/32.png) [@Koxinga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Koxinga)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2010, 4:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-females-are-you-threatened-by-men-of-color-in-social-situations/564177/38 "2010-12-15T04:11:04Z")
> [@ZPG\_Zealot](#): > > I am sure it happens, but the ones that marry outside their culture, I wouldn’t bother considering them Roma. Miscegenation aside, it appears you acknowledge, then, that your original assertion was false, that there is no “dating” in Roma culture. IOW, you admit you’re wrong? > [@Peeta\_Mellark](#): > > Ah, the no true Roma fallacy. > > Soooo, anyway. How about them Indians in those pubs, huh? I like how they stand so erect holding their boxes of cigars. ---
**Author:** ![Rachellelogram](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rachellelogram/32/8689_2.png) [@Rachellelogram](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rachellelogram)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2010, 4:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-females-are-you-threatened-by-men-of-color-in-social-situations/564177/39 "2010-12-15T04:13:57Z")
So where do you meet other Roma folk, anyway? ---
**Author:** ![C3](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/c3/32/3108_2.png) [@C3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/C3)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2010, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-females-are-you-threatened-by-men-of-color-in-social-situations/564177/40 "2010-12-15T04:15:53Z")
> [@rachelellogram](#): > > So where do you meet other Roma folk, anyway? Lookin’ for a date? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-females-are-you-threatened-by-men-of-color-in-social-situations/564177.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-females-are-you-threatened-by-men-of-color-in-social-situations/564177.md?page=3)