# White people: your use of the N word **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 7, 2020, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-people-your-use-of-the-n-word/920043 "2020-09-07T17:56:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 11
**Author:** ![ZPG\_Zealot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/e47c2d/32.png) [@ZPG\_Zealot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZPG_Zealot)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2020, 2:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-people-your-use-of-the-n-word/920043/201 "2020-09-11T14:13:16Z")
Speaking to me for the purpose of trying to have sex with me is the dividing line. ---
**Author:** ![ZPG\_Zealot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/e47c2d/32.png) [@ZPG\_Zealot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZPG_Zealot)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2020, 2:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-people-your-use-of-the-n-word/920043/202 "2020-09-11T14:14:58Z")
I am under no obligation to be polite to someone who is insulting me. And being polite to predatory men rarely works anyway. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2020, 2:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-people-your-use-of-the-n-word/920043/203 "2020-09-11T14:17:51Z")
> [@ZPG\_Zealot](#): > > Speaking to me for the purpose of trying to have sex with me is the dividing line. Since you consider a handshake to be rape, then my tipping my hat and wishing you a good morning would be speaking to you for the purpose of having sex with you. is that correct? ---
**Author:** ![DemonTree](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/demontree/32/8646_2.png) [@DemonTree](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DemonTree)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2020, 2:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-people-your-use-of-the-n-word/920043/204 "2020-09-11T14:25:21Z")
> [@iiandyiiii](#): > > I agree with you on that. We just disagree on what constitutes “bad means”. I hold that boycotts aren’t inherently bad. Nor is internet criticism. Racism is inherently bad. ‘All rhetorical strategies’ covers a lot of bad and harmful ground even if you omit using the n-word. ---
**Author:** ![iiandyiiii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/iiandyiiii/32/7924_2.png) [@iiandyiiii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iiandyiiii)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2020, 2:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-people-your-use-of-the-n-word/920043/205 "2020-09-11T14:31:40Z")
> [@DemonTree](#): > > ‘All rhetorical strategies’ covers a lot of bad and harmful ground even if you omit using the n-word. Possibly. I’ll revise my philosophy to “almost all rhetorical strategies” can be appropriate. ---
**Author:** ![DemonTree](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/demontree/32/8646_2.png) [@DemonTree](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DemonTree)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2020, 2:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-people-your-use-of-the-n-word/920043/206 "2020-09-11T14:44:36Z")
It’s a start. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![madmonk28](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madmonk28/32/20811_2.png) [@madmonk28](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madmonk28)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2020, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-people-your-use-of-the-n-word/920043/207 "2020-09-11T14:49:23Z")
Not exactly. Deen was being sued for racial discrimination. When asked if she had ever used the word, she admitted that she had and used the robbery as an example of having used it. In other words, she cherry picked an example that put its use in the best possible light. For myself, I grew up in the south and heard the word a lot. I also used it in “jokes” when I was a kid, which I regret deeply. ---
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2020, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-people-your-use-of-the-n-word/920043/208 "2020-09-11T14:55:35Z")
When you use a racial slur, you don’t just insult the people you’re addressing. You’re also insulting the people who are unfortunate enough to be within of earshot of you. I guess you don’t care about that, though. ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2020, 2:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-people-your-use-of-the-n-word/920043/209 "2020-09-11T14:59:39Z")
There isn’t room to care about much when you are constantly obsessed with whether or not people are trying to have sex with you. Regardless of whether or not they’re even thinking about you. (You = ZPG). ---
**Author:** ![begbert2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/begbert2/32/3357_2.png) [@begbert2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/begbert2)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2020, 4:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-people-your-use-of-the-n-word/920043/210 "2020-09-11T16:27:57Z")
> [@WitnessMe](#): > > I have to say I don’t believe anyone who claims they’ve never said the word once, if only to themselves. I’m not saying they’re lying necessarily but maybe they have a selective memory. I’m not a racist so I wouldn’t say the word to myself, and it’s weird that you’d assume that everyone is racist to that degree. I’ve probably said the word while talking “about” the word, but other than that, I can say with a high degree of confidence that I haven’t said the word. It wasn’t part of the speech that was used around me as a kid (my version of eenie meenie used “tiger”) and by the time I eventually learned it, I had developed brains and morals. ---
**Author:** ![ZPG\_Zealot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/e47c2d/32.png) [@ZPG\_Zealot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZPG_Zealot)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2020, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-people-your-use-of-the-n-word/920043/211 "2020-09-11T16:35:52Z")
> BlockquoteSince you consider a handshake to be rape, then my tipping my hat and wishing you a good morning would be speaking to you for the purpose of having sex with you. is that correct?\> Blockquote That could be reasonably polite behavior if done sincerely. Hitting on some one, referring to her body in guttural language, asking for sex acts, etc., isn’t polite, it’s demeaning, sexist, and does not deserve a polite response. ---
**Author:** ![Procrustus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/procrustus/32/2994_2.png) [@Procrustus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Procrustus)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2020, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-people-your-use-of-the-n-word/920043/212 "2020-09-11T16:42:07Z")
> [@begbert2](#): > > I’m not a racist so I wouldn’t say the word to myself, and it’s weird that you’d assume that everyone is racist to that degree. I’ve probably said the word while talking “about” the word, but other than that, I can say with a high degree of confidence that I haven’t said the word. Same with me. I only recall hearing the word as a slur three times in my younger days. I was shocked each time. ---
**Author:** ![ZPG\_Zealot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/e47c2d/32.png) [@ZPG\_Zealot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZPG_Zealot)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2020, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-people-your-use-of-the-n-word/920043/213 "2020-09-11T16:42:09Z")
> BlockquoteWhen you use a racial slur, you don’t just insult the people you’re addressing. You’re also insulting the people who are unfortunate enough to be within of earshot of you. I guess you don’t care about that, though.\> Blockquote Women have to use whatever resources we have to protect ourselves. I think when a man does sexist things especially lewd behavior that they think they can get away with because they are physically stronger than the woman, he fully deserves a response that attacks him where he is most vulnerable. With black men, race seems to be the area they are most sensitive about and can be most easily humiliated around. With white men, class insults or deriding their masculinity is more effective. ---
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2020, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-people-your-use-of-the-n-word/920043/214 "2020-09-11T17:01:53Z")
Bullshit. I’ve been hit on by men and never once have I had to resort to a racial slur to get them to leave me alone. Non-racist profanity works pretty well. You act like you’re the only person who has ever had to deal with sexual harassment. Women in general suffer from this indignity. Yet most of us somehow manage not to be anti-social weirdos about it. ---
**Author:** ![iiandyiiii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/iiandyiiii/32/7924_2.png) [@iiandyiiii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iiandyiiii)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2020, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-people-your-use-of-the-n-word/920043/215 "2020-09-11T17:29:14Z")
> [@ZPG\_Zealot](#): > > With black men, race seems to be the area they are most sensitive about and can be most easily humiliated around. Because of the effectiveness of white supremacists through American history and culture. Those white supremacists thank you for assisting them in their work of demeaning and dehumanizing black people due to race. ---
**Author:** ![ZPG\_Zealot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/e47c2d/32.png) [@ZPG\_Zealot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZPG_Zealot)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2020, 6:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-people-your-use-of-the-n-word/920043/216 "2020-09-11T18:05:05Z")
> BlockquoteBecause of the effectiveness of white supremacists through American history and culture. Those white supremacists thank you for assisting them in their work of demeaning and dehumanizing black people due to race.\> Blockquote Any black guy that earns being called a racial slur from me by his actions has already demeaned and dehumanized black people beyond anything me or the white supremacists could dream of. ---
**Author:** ![iiandyiiii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/iiandyiiii/32/7924_2.png) [@iiandyiiii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iiandyiiii)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2020, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-people-your-use-of-the-n-word/920043/217 "2020-09-11T18:08:05Z")
> [@ZPG\_Zealot](#): > > Any black guy that earns being called a racial slur from me by his actions has already demeaned and dehumanized black people beyond anything me or the white supremacists could dream of. I’m sure those white supremacists shared your certainty that they had the perfect understanding of when it was okay to use vile, racist slurs to dehumanize black people. Racism can certainly be an effective tool to hurt people, and you’ve learned that lesson from those white supremacists very well, it seems. ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2020, 6:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-people-your-use-of-the-n-word/920043/218 "2020-09-11T18:17:22Z")
> [@ZPG\_Zealot](#): > > Any black guy that earns being called a racial slur from me by his actions has already demeaned and dehumanized black people beyond anything me or the white supremacists could dream of. Right. Because _of course_ he was representative of the entire black culture. Not some douche bag who spoke and behaved only on his own behalf. No possible reason to hold him accountable for his actions. Best to insult his entire heritage to really drive home the point. ---
**Author:** ![thorny\_locust](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thorny_locust/32/431_2.png) [@thorny\_locust](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thorny_locust)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2020, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-people-your-use-of-the-n-word/920043/219 "2020-09-11T18:32:41Z")
> [@ZPG\_Zealot](#): > > Any black guy that earns being called a racial slur from me by his actions has already demeaned and dehumanized black people beyond anything me or the white supremacists could dream of. You think all black people become justifiably dehumanized because one black person behaves badly? Now there’s a racist argument if I ever saw one. ---
**Author:** ![ZPG\_Zealot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/e47c2d/32.png) [@ZPG\_Zealot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZPG_Zealot)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2020, 7:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-people-your-use-of-the-n-word/920043/220 "2020-09-11T19:10:27Z")
> BlockquoteYou think all black people become justifiably dehumanized because one black person behaves badly? > Now there’s a racist argument if I ever saw one. > Blockquote You misunderstand, why I am I not surprised. The message was that when individuals behavior despicably such as sexually harassing women they do more damage to the perception their people than any racial slur ever could. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-people-your-use-of-the-n-word/920043.md?page=10) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-people-your-use-of-the-n-word/920043.md?page=12)