# White People's Funny Names for Children **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [November 30, 2018, 2:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-peoples-funny-names-for-children/825308 "2018-11-30T02:29:49Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![Dr.Drake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ad7895/32.png) [@Dr.Drake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Drake)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2018, 10:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-peoples-funny-names-for-children/825308/101 "2018-11-30T22:51:15Z")
> [@Akaj](#): > > My wife’s grandmother – 100% Norwegian, born in the middle of a mostly Scandinavian area of central Iowa – had the middle name “Juanita.” Her folks must have been a hoot. If she was born in the early 20th century, there was a popular song “Juanita” around at the time. My grandmother, also very white, had the same name, but rather less accurately spelled: clearly, my great-grandparents had only heard it, because they started with a W and it just got worse from there. ---
**Author:** ![Akaj](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/akaj/32/145_2.png) [@Akaj](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Akaj)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2018, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-peoples-funny-names-for-children/825308/102 "2018-11-30T22:56:16Z")
> [@Omar\_Little](#): > > I had a classmate in elementary school named Lieutenant George, first and last. My mother swore she went to school with a girl named Crystal Lear. Whose middle name was Shanda. ---
**Author:** ![Akaj](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/akaj/32/145_2.png) [@Akaj](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Akaj)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2018, 10:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-peoples-funny-names-for-children/825308/103 "2018-11-30T22:57:21Z")
> [@Dr.Drake](#): > > If she was born in the early 20th century, there was a popular song “Juanita” around at the time. My grandmother, also very white, had the same name, but rather less accurately spelled: clearly, my great-grandparents had only heard it, because they started with a W and it just got worse from there. You’re probably right – thanks for that cool bit of trivia! ---
**Author:** ![foolsguinea](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foolsguinea/32/14751_2.png) [@foolsguinea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/foolsguinea)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2018, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-peoples-funny-names-for-children/825308/104 "2018-11-30T22:58:24Z")
> [@AnalogSignal](#): > > Well, I think Abcde is a cool name. Certainly a lot more interesting than Jennifer. I guess I’m weird. Of course, I wouldn’t name my kid Abcde but I can appreciate the uniqueness of it. It’s cute, and while not easy to pronounce, it is easy to spell. I don’t think it’s going to be as bad for her as some posters here are making it out to be. ---
**Author:** ![Lacunae\_Matata](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@Lacunae\_Matata](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lacunae_Matata)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2018, 11:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-peoples-funny-names-for-children/825308/105 "2018-11-30T23:00:43Z")
> [@Akaj](#): > > My wife’s grandmother – 100% Norwegian, born in the middle of a mostly Scandinavian area of central Iowa – had the middle name “Juanita.” Her folks must have been a hoot. I have a great aunt Juanita and a great uncle Carlos, both born into po’ white Anglo families. Honestly, I think you just start running out of names around the tenth or twelfth kid… (Genealogy research has also turned up sisters named Missouri, Mississippi, Georgia, and Virginia; great granduncles named Aquila and Grandberry; a grandmother in law named Clyde; and a great grandmother Honor Ophelia. Kind of refreshing after sorting through a zillion Johns, Peters, Nancys, and Elizabeths.) ---
**Author:** ![Railer13](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/railer13/32/9742_2.png) [@Railer13](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Railer13)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2018, 11:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-peoples-funny-names-for-children/825308/106 "2018-11-30T23:07:07Z")
> [@Akaj](#): > > My mother swore she went to school with a girl named Crystal Lear. Whose middle name was Shanda. I used to work with a woman whose maiden name was Smith. Her first name was Merry. Yes, spelled M E R R Y. You may have guessed her middle name: Chris Merry Chris Smith I kid you not. ---
**Author:** ![Snowboarder\_Bo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snowboarder_bo/32/229_2.png) [@Snowboarder\_Bo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snowboarder_Bo)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2018, 11:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-peoples-funny-names-for-children/825308/107 "2018-11-30T23:08:27Z")
> [@Akaj](#): > > My mother swore she went to school with a girl named Crystal Lear. Whose middle name was Shanda. I did go to school with Candace (Candy) Caine. A fellow archeology student in college was a woman named Science. She hated the name; I thought it rocked. ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Strangelove](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr.strangelove/32/6613_2.png) [@Dr.Strangelove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Strangelove)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2018, 11:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-peoples-funny-names-for-children/825308/108 "2018-11-30T23:18:56Z")
> [@Akaj](#): > > My mother swore she went to school with a girl named Crystal Lear. Whose middle name was Shanda. Bill Lear, of Lear Jet fame, named a daughter “Shanda”. ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2018, 11:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-peoples-funny-names-for-children/825308/109 "2018-11-30T23:22:33Z")
> [@AnalogSignal](#): > > Well, I think Abcde is a cool name. Certainly a lot more interesting than Jennifer. I guess I’m weird. Of course, I wouldn’t name my kid Abcde but I can appreciate the uniqueness of it. I want my child to be unique the old fashioned way, by actually being special. He should earn his uniqueness, and not have a cheap form of distinctiveness imposed on him. His name should be special because he makes it special. ---
**Author:** ![Kimstu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ecd19e/32.png) [@Kimstu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimstu)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2018, 11:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-peoples-funny-names-for-children/825308/110 "2018-11-30T23:28:33Z")
> [@Snowboarder\_Bo](#): > > I did go to school with Candace (Candy) Caine. I had a classmate named Sandy Beech, and later a colleague named Barbara Dwyer (yup, nickname Barb). It’s one thing to find unusual, weird or punning names to be cute, funny or silly in one’s personal opinion. It’s a different thing to try to shame or condemn parents for irresponsibility or cruelty just because they decided to give their child a name that somebody else considers weird. If all of the judgemental energy now being expended in chiding and tut-tutting such parents were harnessed instead in the service of shutting down the bullies and assholes who try to make children feel bad about their names, we’d have solved the problem by now and could stop clutching our pearls about how parents are “burdening” their children with inappropriate nomenclature. It’s just a name. Get over it. ---
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2018, 11:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-peoples-funny-names-for-children/825308/111 "2018-11-30T23:47:18Z")
It’s pronounced Ahs-WEE-pay! Apologies if I’m late to the party and that’s already taken. Didn’t read all 3 pages. > [@Grrr](#): > > I have a friend named Selena. Not a weird name per say, but it kind of is when you take into account that my friend doesn’t have an ounce of Latin blood in her. (She’s white) > [@Kimstu](#): > > 😕 Non-Latina women have been using the given name “Selena” for decades if not centuries. See, e.g.: [actress Selena Royle](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Selena_Royle) (1904-1983), [educator Selena Sloan Butler](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Selena_Sloan_Butler) (1872-1964), [pagan religions activist Selena Fox](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Selena_Fox) (b. 1949), and many more. > > See, this is another reason it’s dumb to make fun of given names for being “weird”; it so often turns out that the apparent “weirdness” is merely due to one’s own lack of information about the name and its history. Not to mention that many Latinas are white. ---
**Author:** ![carrps](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carrps/32/2957_2.png) [@carrps](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carrps)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2018, 11:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-peoples-funny-names-for-children/825308/112 "2018-11-30T23:53:09Z")
> [@Grrr](#): > > I have a friend named Selena. Not a weird name per say, but it kind of is when you take into account that my friend doesn’t have an ounce of Latin blood in her. (She’s white) I was just mentioning to friends the other day (while watching an old movie) how I was surprised at how popular the name Juanita was for anglo women back in the 20s and 30s. ---
**Author:** ![Moriarty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/moriarty/32/49_2.png) [@Moriarty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moriarty)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2018, 11:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-peoples-funny-names-for-children/825308/113 "2018-11-30T23:58:20Z")
Truly Nolen Pest Control has offices in (just checked) 17 states, Puerto Rico, and Canada. Their business is best known for the fact that their cars have [mouse ears](http://www.trulynolenfranchising.com/company/history-of-the-mouse-car.asp). Anyway, Truly Nolen is the name of the company owner (I discovered this when I worked for a guy who was helping Truly with an aircraft purchase - he’s done well for himself). Among his children are the names Really, Sincere Leigh, and Spyder. … There’s also the fairly well known story of the guy who named his kids Winner and Loser. Loser (who went by Lou) became a reasonably successful police detective, while Winner had a life of crime. Names aren’t a guarantee of anything. ---
**Author:** ![carrps](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carrps/32/2957_2.png) [@carrps](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carrps)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2018, 12:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-peoples-funny-names-for-children/825308/114 "2018-12-01T00:06:21Z")
> [@Dr.Drake](#): > > If she was born in the early 20th century, there was a popular song “Juanita” around at the time. My grandmother, also very white, had the same name, but rather less accurately spelled: clearly, my great-grandparents had only heard it, because they started with a W and it just got worse from there. Oh, thanks! I posted my previous comment without reading through to the end of the thread. I’m happy to have this (very minor) mystery solved! I worked with a guy whose last name was Case, and he named his son Justin. ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2018, 12:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-peoples-funny-names-for-children/825308/115 "2018-12-01T00:06:54Z")
> [@Jasmine](#): > > I read somewhere that the old rocker, Frank Zappa, named his daughter “Moon Unit”. Sounds like that may be just an urban legend, though. (Haven’t read the whole thread) No, it’s true. Had Moon Unit been a boy, he would have been named Motorhead. Her younger siblings are brothers Dweezil and Ahmet Rodin, and Diva Thin Muffin Pigeen, so named because she was the loudest baby in the nursery. My grandmother’s name was Lola; that name started rising in popularity around the time of her death in 2007. Who ever thought THAT name would come back?!? However, there were a couple of movie stars who gave that name to their daughters, and that’s where it came from. Beatrice was also on the rise, even before the “Divergent” series came out, and I’ve also seen plenty of little girls named Dorothy, Evelyn, Hazel, Ava, Hattie, and other names that often show up in the obituaries. :o I know that “Caitlin” is an old-fashioned Irish name; does anyone know what contributed to its rise in popularity, not to mention multiple spellings, in the past 30 or so years? “Gage” came from Officer Gage in the old “Emergency” series. I read about OB nurses who started seeing that name in the 1980s, usually for boys but not always, and asked the parents where it came from. They all replied, at first, that they had been big fans of “Emergency” and loved the name and always said they would want to give it to their son if they ever had one. ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2018, 12:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-peoples-funny-names-for-children/825308/116 "2018-12-01T00:12:51Z")
> [@silenus](#): > > Or at the very least, confine your “creativity” to the kid’s middle name, where they can ignore it or not at their pleasure. I actually like kreatyve middle names, and even though I never wanted or had children, there are a few on my “I like this name” list. Mine’s Lynn. How white-bread is that? HOWEVER I was almost named Barbara Ann. The Beach Boys song came out the next year. ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2018, 12:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-peoples-funny-names-for-children/825308/117 "2018-12-01T00:20:55Z")
I used to know a woman named Jennifer who would be about 90 years old if she’s still living. Since about 1970, she was constantly asked if she was Jennifer’s mother. :smack: Ima Hogg was also a real person. > **[Ima Hogg](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ima_Hogg)** > > Ima Hogg (July 10, 1882 – August 19, 1975), known as "The First Lady of Texas", was an American society leader, philanthropist, mental health advocate, patron and collector of the arts, and one of the most respected women in Texas during the 20th century. Hogg was an avid art collector, and owned works by Picasso, Klee, and Matisse, among others. Hogg donated hundreds of pieces of artwork to Houston's Museum of Fine Arts and served on a committee to plan the Kennedy Center in Washington, D. Ho... ---
**Author:** ![WolfpackJeep](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpackjeep/32/2921_2.png) [@WolfpackJeep](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WolfpackJeep)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2018, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-peoples-funny-names-for-children/825308/118 "2018-12-01T00:24:27Z")
Haven’t read the whole thread yet, but… I have a [white] relative named Juanita who frequently laments that her parents gave her a “black person” name. :smack: At the company where my father worked, one of the older ladies had a grandson named Fisher Price [last name]. His parents liked selecting old family names for their kids. And I have a cousin who names her children using presidents’ last names. This worked great, until she had a girl. The girl was given a suitably popular girly name which was used for about a year, until one or both parents decided the name was a mistake, and legally changed the child’s name to something more in keeping with the theme used for the other kids. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2018, 12:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-peoples-funny-names-for-children/825308/119 "2018-12-01T00:34:36Z")
> [@nearwildheaven](#): > > (Haven’t read the whole thread) We can tell. ---
**Author:** ![Weedy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/weedy/32/301_2.png) [@Weedy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weedy)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2018, 12:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-peoples-funny-names-for-children/825308/120 "2018-12-01T00:38:40Z")
I know a kid called Juan, pronounced Joo-Un. I don’t know how his parents came up with that. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-peoples-funny-names-for-children/825308.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/white-peoples-funny-names-for-children/825308.md?page=7)