I saw Senator Levin at Eastern Market in DC one day (true story!), and he seemed remarkably small and non-bloated. I was quite surprised. This was about 2009, IIRC.
USS Raymond Burr.
USS Casey Ryback.
But only if no battleship is available.
We want them to attack, not pollinate.
A USS John Wayne would be pretty cool.
With the reservation I do not care for naming boats after people…
“The president of the Nation Line had one child—a daughter—and the only ship in the line that wasn’t named after a nation was the Winifred Wilford which was named after her. But only for a year or so, when it was changed to the Flemish, Miss Wilford not liking the way the newspapers talked about the Winifred Wilford being scraped and the Winifred Wilford have a new refrigerating plant put into her. She said that it was vulgar and so Sir Ernest, her father, changed the name. I heard this from his valet, who used to be a bedroom steward on the Italian.”
Edgar Wallace : The Steward
It would be a positive step for the military to refrain from honouring themselves, past leaders, or their paymasters, politicians, to avoid self-serving.
Using national role-models who exemplify those things foreigners consider, not uniquely, since most things are universal, but especially American would be ideal.
There are remarkable businessmen, such as Bill Gates or Thomas Edison, neither great shakes as inventors, but excellent in commerce. Roy Kroc, who transformed fast-food; various Wall Street makers and breakers.
America has few great in the plastic arts, painting and sculpture, but then artists may shrink from publicity, whereas entertainers never never do: Granma Moses might reject the honour, but with thousands of singers, from Elvis Presley to Lady Gaga, and hundreds of thousands of actors from pre-film Joseph Jefferson to Chloë Moretz, there is a plethora of choice.
America is most famous of all as the major driver of LGBT rights, and has done more than any other place to obsess with and help these causes: how about the first sex-change American back in the 1940s ? Or many prominent Gay people such as Harvey Milk ( who like Strom Thurmond, has a name that instantly makes people smile ) to take one at random.
Lawbreakers, such as bandits, eventually are taken into peoples’ hearts, and remembered kindly; from Jesse James to Al Capone. Is it not time to forgive and forget ?
Then there are entire groups of little unsung people, from trades unions to political activist groups — to name after them would not approve their aims, but at least recognise their democratic passion for change.
There are prominent theologians from Jonathan Edwards to Benny Hinn; there are entire industries from shirt-makers, to arms-makers, to porn, to Silicon Valley, to gambling, to wine-making that could sponsor a ship: there are unique religious groups that could suggest a name without endorsing their belief: the ‘Mormon’; the ‘Sea-Org’, the ‘Shaker’.
You have too many choices, not too little.
USS Rooster Cogburn
To continue the fictional he-man theme.
The naming custom goes 'way back in the U.S. Navy, long before the Wright Brothers:
Plus then there was that other Jefferson’s, Thomas, idea of equipping the US Navy solely with tiny wooden coastal craft, each with up to a dozen men, and eschewing large expensive battleships.
They would swarm the enemy frigate and overwhelm by sheer numbers.
It was not a good idea; but few of his ideas were.
I do not know what baby wasps are called.
Theodore Roosevelt, in his still-cited The Naval War of 1812, was scathing in his criticism of Jefferson’s penny-pinching and poorly-thought-out naval policy.
Although in the Barbary Wars, it was demonstrated that gunboats could indeed outmaneuver and defeat a frigate, but in that case, the frigate had run aground and was entirely unable to maneuver at all.
Gunboats historically are far more useful for littoral support of ground forces, as the gunboat navy saw some use for in the War of 1812, and which the Union’s armored gunboats saw considerable use for during the American Civil War.
It would really tie the fleet together.
Let’s go bowling.
The Dude scares no one. What you want is the USS Walter Sobchak. Ship’s motto: “You are entering a world of pain!”
And the crew makes vague references to the ship’s service in Vietnam.
Related story in the Wall St. Journal - how newly discovered species are named for celebrities:
*"Naming species after celebrities offers scientists a ready supply of names, and maybe the possibility of a brush with greatness.
In the past five years, an aquatic mite has been named for Jennifer Lopez; several wasps for the hobbits in “The Lord of the Rings”; a crayfish for National Security Agency leaker Edward Snowden; a fish for Barack Obama; and a genus of ferns, a wasp and a prehistoric mammal for Lady Gaga.
Scientists thought a fly named for Beyoncé Knowles looked slightly “bootylicious,” and an extinct hippopotamus named for Mick Jagger had sensuous lips."*
We could have a carrier named the U.S.S. Kardashian, made entirely of plastic.