# Who has baby Jesus? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 16, 2018, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-baby-jesus/826224 "2018-12-16T15:31:04Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![lingyi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d2c977/32.png) [@lingyi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lingyi)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2018, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-baby-jesus/826224/41 "2018-12-23T17:54:33Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > They don’t have to play dumb. They’re not exactly geniuses.( love them regardless) These cats have super powers. They’ve been trying to convince me for days the dogs did it. I ain’t buying it. Still don’t have me convinced, the dogs might be planning their next big caper right now since this one worked so well! 🆒 P.S. Glad he’s back! Merry Christmas if don’t bump into each other along the way! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2018, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-baby-jesus/826224/42 "2018-12-23T18:15:04Z")
I guess I should start the interrogations again. It’s hard to be good cop/ bad cop when you’re only one person. That and the cats have lawyered up. ---
**Author:** ![ekedolphin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ekedolphin/32/10003_2.png) [@ekedolphin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ekedolphin)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2018, 4:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-baby-jesus/826224/43 "2018-12-24T04:03:52Z")
This thread is a _hoot._ ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2018, 5:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-baby-jesus/826224/44 "2018-12-24T05:24:28Z")
I did finally have to get BJ out of his predicament. I placed him back in the manger. Walked it the kitchen and heard a crash. Back in the living room one cat was on the little table, all the wise men and Santa were knocked over. The fake snow was flying, ( don’t ask about the snow, it’s a long tale) And the other cat had BJ in her mouth. Get this _Her_ mouth. She’s supposed to be the good cat. But, OH NO, she’s was actually carrying the baby by his head, as she zoomed past me, up the stairs, to the top of a bookshelf and lickety-split on the beams in top of the loft. I’ll never see BJ again. I fear. ---
**Author:** ![lingyi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d2c977/32.png) [@lingyi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lingyi)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2018, 5:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-baby-jesus/826224/45 "2018-12-24T05:31:32Z")
I’m telling you the DOGS made the racket as a distraction and stuck BJ in the cats mout… _Hears soft pawlike knocking on the door_ _Opens door slightly_ Ummm…nevermind…the CAT did it! _Whisper_ "We’re all good now?\* _High Five Paw_ _Phew_ 😃 Thanks for making my night! ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2018, 5:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-baby-jesus/826224/46 "2018-12-24T05:48:05Z")
The dogs are acting kinda skeevy. I’m gonna go get one of Mr.Wrekkers game cameras and set it up. Of course I gotta get BJ out of the beams first. Hey, maybe the cat is helping him to ascend to the heavens. Hmmm? Wonder what they got against Messiah on earth? Maybe they are Jewish. I didn’t ask their faith at the breeder. That should’ve been on a form or something. I guess I’ll have to have a bar-mitzva. No, wait he’s been neutered. Uh-oh. ---
**Author:** ![What\_Exit](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/what_exit/32/10652_2.png) [@What\_Exit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/What_Exit)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2018, 1:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-baby-jesus/826224/47 "2018-12-24T13:21:08Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > The dogs are acting kinda skeevy. I’m gonna go get one of Mr.Wrekkers game cameras and set it up. Of course I gotta get BJ out of the beams first. > Hey, maybe the cat is helping him to ascend to the heavens. Hmmm? Wonder what they got against Messiah on earth? Maybe they are Jewish. I didn’t ask their faith at the breeder. That should’ve been on a form or something. I guess I’ll have to have a bar-mitzva. No, wait he’s been neutered. Uh-oh. No cat is Kosher, so probably not Jewish. Wait, that logic doesn’t work. However, fairly good chance that while cats believe in God, it is a belief in themselves. As in they believe they are God. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2018, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-baby-jesus/826224/48 "2018-12-24T16:52:07Z")
Somehow that makes semse.^^^^ ---
**Author:** ![Yllaria](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yllaria/32/3452_2.png) [@Yllaria](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yllaria)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2018, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-baby-jesus/826224/49 "2018-12-24T16:53:28Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > I did finally have to get BJ out of his predicament. I placed him back in the manger. Walked it the kitchen and heard a crash. Back in the living room one cat was on the little table, all the wise men and Santa were knocked over. The fake snow was flying, ( don’t ask about the snow, it’s a long tale) And the other cat had BJ in her mouth. Get this _Her_ mouth. She’s supposed to be the good cat. But, OH NO, she’s was actually carrying the baby by his head, as she zoomed past me, up the stairs, to the top of a bookshelf and lickety-split on the beams in top of the loft. I’ll never see BJ again. I fear. It’s the dogs. The dogs smeared tuna oil on baby Jesus to entrap the cats. Or it’s the Russians, trying to sow dissent between the dogs and cats. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2018, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-baby-jesus/826224/50 "2018-12-24T16:59:37Z")
My obese beagle would not have passed up a delicacy such as, a tuna smeared BabyJesus. She’d have been in heaven (heh). ---
**Author:** ![blondebear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blondebear/32/1022_2.png) [@blondebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blondebear)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2018, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-baby-jesus/826224/51 "2018-12-24T17:08:38Z")
Maybe you need an elf on a shelf to keep those cats honest. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2018, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-baby-jesus/826224/52 "2018-12-24T19:28:41Z")
My Elf on a shelf is hidden away. Grandkids are freaked out about him. So…update: I have BJ in my hoodie pocket. It fell from the beam I guess. I found it on the 4th step from the top of the stairs. No one saw me pick it up. When all the animals are napping or otherwise engaged I’m gonna put him back it the manger. I have a camera set up. I’m gonna get to the bottom of this before Santa and the Reindeer fly. I have high hopes of succeeding, this time. Stay tuned. ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2018, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-baby-jesus/826224/53 "2018-12-24T21:43:16Z")
Consider putting a bunch of tempting boxes around, or some tape on the floor in the shape of a box to trap those feline purloiners. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2018, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-baby-jesus/826224/54 "2018-12-24T21:58:40Z")
I’ve tried taped square on the floor. They didn’t do anything but look at me, with snooty disapproval. Have I mentioned they are genius cats. (And very beautiful) ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2018, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-baby-jesus/826224/55 "2018-12-24T22:10:08Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > Have I mentioned they are genius cats. (And very beautiful) But they ain’t no Dachshunds. ---
**Author:** ![lingyi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d2c977/32.png) [@lingyi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lingyi)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2018, 10:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-baby-jesus/826224/56 "2018-12-24T22:52:19Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > My Elf on a shelf is hidden away. Grandkids are freaked out about him. > So…update: I have BJ in my hoodie pocket. It fell from the beam I guess. I found it on the 4th step from the top of the stairs. No one saw me pick it up. When all the animals are napping or otherwise engaged I’m gonna put him back it the manger. I have a camera set up. I’m gonna get to the bottom of this before Santa and the Reindeer fly. I have high hopes of succeeding, this time. Stay tuned. Beware of dogs in cat’s clothing! 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2018, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-baby-jesus/826224/57 "2018-12-24T22:59:55Z")
Or cats in dog suits. ---
**Author:** ![TruCelt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trucelt/32/523_2.png) [@TruCelt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TruCelt)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2018, 2:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-baby-jesus/826224/58 "2018-12-25T02:53:36Z")
Get[one of these](https://www.amazon.com/Doberman-Security-Portable-Alarm-alarms/dp/B000KDUCU0) and put the sensor between baby Jesus and the manger. The cats will only steal him one more time. Have game camera ready -\> put video on Youtube -\> Profit!!! ---
**Author:** ![lingyi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d2c977/32.png) [@lingyi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lingyi)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2018, 4:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-baby-jesus/826224/59 "2018-12-25T04:21:22Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > Or cats in dog suits. I got it figured out!!! The ‘cat’ you saw take BJ was one of the dogs in a cat suit, at the same time that cat was in a dog suit acting ‘dumb’ (to make you think cats are superior!). Mystery solved! 😃 Awww, dangit! I hear two sets of paw knocks on my door now. :eek: Happy New Year to you all if I don’t come back! ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [December 25, 2018, 4:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-baby-jesus/826224/60 "2018-12-25T04:33:43Z")
So far this evening no escapades in the nativity. Baby Jesus is a bit worse for the wear. One eye lash ( his eyes are closed) is missing and there’s a a scratch or 2. He’s back under Mother Mary’s gaze. Santa isn’t looking anymore. His neck is kinda twisted. The cats are on the dryer asleep after their big Christmas eve treat. Before I go upstairs I’m gonna turn the camera back on. Maybe I’ll catch a mysterious visitor. Hmmmm? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-baby-jesus/826224.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-baby-jesus/826224.md?page=4)