# Who has gone without sex the longest and the shortest amount of time (at the time of your reply)

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-gone-without-sex-the-longest-and-the-shortest-amount-of-time-at-the-time-of-your-reply/513304>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [October 10, 2009, 11:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-gone-without-sex-the-longest-and-the-shortest-amount-of-time-at-the-time-of-your-reply/513304 "2009-10-10T11:56:57Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 3

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**Author:** ![TNWPsycho](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/47e85d/32.png) [@TNWPsycho](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TNWPsycho)\
**Post date:** [October 11, 2009, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-gone-without-sex-the-longest-and-the-shortest-amount-of-time-at-the-time-of-your-reply/513304/41 "2009-10-11T15:37:46Z")

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19 years 3 months!

What do i win?

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**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\
**Post date:** [October 11, 2009, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-gone-without-sex-the-longest-and-the-shortest-amount-of-time-at-the-time-of-your-reply/513304/42 "2009-10-11T16:08:35Z")

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> [@Idle\_Thoughts](#):
>
> Holy crap..I was just about to tell **Quartz** he won the virgin one…but do you have him beat? If not, you definitely have the longest “non-virgin” win…

How old do you think I am? Yeah, **Quartz** is in second.

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**Author:** ![ArrMatey](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/arrmatey/32/3522_2.png) [@ArrMatey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ArrMatey)\
**Post date:** [October 11, 2009, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-gone-without-sex-the-longest-and-the-shortest-amount-of-time-at-the-time-of-your-reply/513304/43 "2009-10-11T16:16:11Z")

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Have had. Nineteen years, eight months.

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**Author:** ![Colophon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f05b48/32.png) [@Colophon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colophon)\
**Post date:** [October 11, 2009, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-gone-without-sex-the-longest-and-the-shortest-amount-of-time-at-the-time-of-your-reply/513304/44 "2009-10-11T17:33:28Z")

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> [@Helen\_Jewett](#):
>
> I’ll be 25 on Wednesday and I’m a virgin. Also, I’m starting to think I may be invisible.

Not _the_ Helen Jewett, then, I presume? :dubious:

Um, about 19 hours for me. And about 4 hours before that (my wife had just got back from a couple of days away).

Sorry.

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**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\
**Post date:** [October 11, 2009, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-gone-without-sex-the-longest-and-the-shortest-amount-of-time-at-the-time-of-your-reply/513304/45 "2009-10-11T18:03:29Z")

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I can’t believe you people know down to the month how long its been. 19 years _and 8 months_? Did you somehow know it was going to be your last for a long tome and mark it on a calendar or something?

I don’t know exactly myself – more than 5 yeears and less than 10 is about all I can be sure of.

What do wet dreams count as? I’m pretty sure I thought I was having sex with someone – or possibly someone crept into my bed and had sex with me as I slept.

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**Author:** ![MeanOldLady](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/meanoldlady/32/10737_2.png) [@MeanOldLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeanOldLady)\
**Post date:** [October 11, 2009, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-gone-without-sex-the-longest-and-the-shortest-amount-of-time-at-the-time-of-your-reply/513304/46 "2009-10-11T18:09:26Z")

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Hey guys, I’m married. What’s sex?

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**Author:** ![Helen\_Jewett](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/bcef8e/32.png) [@Helen\_Jewett](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Helen_Jewett)\
**Post date:** [October 11, 2009, 6:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-gone-without-sex-the-longest-and-the-shortest-amount-of-time-at-the-time-of-your-reply/513304/47 "2009-10-11T18:17:22Z")

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> [@Colophon](#):
>
> Not _the_ Helen Jewett, then, I presume? :dubious:

No indeed. But I do meet the “excessively literate” qualification, if that helps.

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**Author:** ![Lsura](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7993a0/32.png) [@Lsura](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lsura)\
**Post date:** [October 11, 2009, 6:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-gone-without-sex-the-longest-and-the-shortest-amount-of-time-at-the-time-of-your-reply/513304/48 "2009-10-11T18:39:30Z")

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> [@Boyo\_Jim](#):
>
> I can’t believe you people know down to the month how long its been. 19 years _and 8 months_? Did you somehow know it was going to be your last for a long tome and mark it on a calendar or something?

No, it’s just that there were other events that happened that month that precipitated not having sex with that person again, which lets me identify the month.  
Oh, and **Stoid** , yes, my bits work, and work quite well. I still have sexual feelings - but I deal with them myself. I have finally, after many years, reached the point that I am ready and mentally able to be intimate with another person - I had a hell of a lot of healing to do on a number of levels. Don’t assume that we’re physically (or necessarily mentally) broken - there may be physical reasons for some, there maybe mental reasons for some and there may be religious reasons for some - and there may well be other reasons.

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**Author:** ![Rico](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rico/32/3582_2.png) [@Rico](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rico)\
**Post date:** [October 11, 2009, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-gone-without-sex-the-longest-and-the-shortest-amount-of-time-at-the-time-of-your-reply/513304/49 "2009-10-11T19:12:13Z")

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Reminded me of this:

* * *

A crusty old Marine Sergeant Major found himself at a gala event hosted by a local liberal arts college. There was no shortage of extremely young, idealistic ladies in attendance. One of the ladies approached the Sergeant Major.

“Excuse me, Sergeant Major, but you seem to be a very serious man. Is something bothering you?”

“Negative, ma’am. Just serious by nature.”

The young lady looked at his awards and decorations, and said, “It looks like you have seen a lot of action.”

“Yes, ma’am, a lot of action.”

The young lady, tiring of trying to start up a conversation, said, “You know, you should lighten up a little. Relax and enjoy yourself.”

The Sergeant Major just stared at her.

Finally the young lady said, “You know, I hope you don’t take this the wrong way, but when is the last time you had sex?”

“1955, ma’am.”

“Well, there you are. You really need to chill out and quit taking everything so seriously! I mean, no sex since 1955!”

She took his hand and led him to a private room where she proceeded to “relax” him several times.

Afterwards, panting for breath, she leaned against his bare chest and said, “Wow, you sure didn’t forget much since 1955!”

The Sergeant Major, glancing at his watch, said in his matter of fact voice, “I hope not, it’s only 2130 now.”

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**Author:** ![River\_Hippie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/river_hippie/32/26_2.png) [@River\_Hippie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/River_Hippie)\
**Post date:** [October 11, 2009, 11:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-gone-without-sex-the-longest-and-the-shortest-amount-of-time-at-the-time-of-your-reply/513304/50 "2009-10-11T23:00:12Z")

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> [@Stoid](#):
>
> You people are depressing the hell out of me.
> 
> And of course, driving me crazy with curiosity. Do your parts still work?
> 
> Maybe that should be a category separation… what’s the longest for people whose bodies still function and feel sexually? Cuz I can’t believe that all you folks who’ve gone such incredibly long times have done so while still being able, willing, and eager.
> 
> My sympathies. ☹

No sympathy needed, all my stuff works just fine and gets put to the test frequently. It’s all solo, though. I was blessed with a vivid imagination.

After my divorce I had an exaggerated fear of impregnating someone I didn’t want to have a kid with.

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**Author:** ![Alice\_The\_Goon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Alice\_The\_Goon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alice_The_Goon)\
**Post date:** [October 11, 2009, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-gone-without-sex-the-longest-and-the-shortest-amount-of-time-at-the-time-of-your-reply/513304/51 "2009-10-11T23:16:16Z")

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The longest: January 2007 to… Friday night.

🆒

The last time: 6 hours ago.

😃

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**Author:** ![Stoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stoid/32/272_2.png) [@Stoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stoid)\
**Post date:** [October 12, 2009, 12:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-gone-without-sex-the-longest-and-the-shortest-amount-of-time-at-the-time-of-your-reply/513304/52 "2009-10-12T00:04:01Z")

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> [@River\_Hippie](#):
>
> No sympathy needed, all my stuff works just fine and gets put to the test frequently. It’s all solo, though. I was blessed with a vivid imagination.
> 
> After my divorce I had an exaggerated fear of impregnating someone I didn’t want to have a kid with.

Well, ,gee…ever think about banking your sperm and getting snipped?

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**Author:** ![sleeping](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/839c29/32.png) [@sleeping](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sleeping)\
**Post date:** [October 12, 2009, 12:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-gone-without-sex-the-longest-and-the-shortest-amount-of-time-at-the-time-of-your-reply/513304/53 "2009-10-12T00:05:41Z")

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Well, I didn’t have sex, but I have been screwed a number of times this past week …

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**Author:** ![Stoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stoid/32/272_2.png) [@Stoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stoid)\
**Post date:** [October 12, 2009, 12:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-gone-without-sex-the-longest-and-the-shortest-amount-of-time-at-the-time-of-your-reply/513304/54 "2009-10-12T00:09:22Z")

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> [@MeanOldLady](#):
>
> Hey guys, I’m married. What’s sex?

I never understood this. I was in a committed relationship (engaged, nver got around to it) for ten years and it was good right up to the last minute. Not as frequent in year 10 as Year 1, but hardly over.

Sigh…

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**Author:** ![MsWhatsit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/eb8c5e/32.png) [@MsWhatsit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsWhatsit)\
**Post date:** [October 12, 2009, 12:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-gone-without-sex-the-longest-and-the-shortest-amount-of-time-at-the-time-of-your-reply/513304/55 "2009-10-12T00:15:17Z")

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About 14 hours ago.

I win nothing, but am OK with this.

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**Author:** ![schnuckiputzi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecb155/32.png) [@schnuckiputzi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/schnuckiputzi)\
**Post date:** [October 12, 2009, 1:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-gone-without-sex-the-longest-and-the-shortest-amount-of-time-at-the-time-of-your-reply/513304/56 "2009-10-12T01:30:40Z")

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Unfortunately, there have been long stretches (months and months) when mein Herr didn’t get any due to…a nearly-fatal and very messy hysterectomy that went seriously wrong…and chemo…did you know that if one person is taking chemo and you have sex with someone, the second person can get sick from the drugs due to contact with your bodily fluids? Not that sexy.☹

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**Author:** ![fachverwirrt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/94ad74/32.png) [@fachverwirrt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fachverwirrt)\
**Post date:** [October 12, 2009, 2:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-gone-without-sex-the-longest-and-the-shortest-amount-of-time-at-the-time-of-your-reply/513304/57 "2009-10-12T02:13:12Z")

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About two hours. I wasn’t watching the clock.

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**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\
**Post date:** [October 12, 2009, 2:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-gone-without-sex-the-longest-and-the-shortest-amount-of-time-at-the-time-of-your-reply/513304/58 "2009-10-12T02:30:01Z")

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Well, for those of you who are puzzled as to how or why those here haven’t had sex for a while… I can’t speak for the others, but as for me, there’s sex and then there’s sex. I refuse to have what I call “hygiene sex” anymore. Hygiene sex is where neither party is all that emotionally interested in the other, but they want the release (this is not the same, I imagine as best friend with bennys, but I’m not of that generation), which 9 times out of 10 is release for him, not me, so why bother? IOW, I don’t have sex with my husband.

Since I don’t believe in open marriage (whatever that is) or infidelity, this means I don’t have sex. Would I like to have sex? I guess. I don’t have sex with strangers, so it would have to be in a somewhat bizarre set of circumstances that I don’t see happening in the next few years. The situation is not pathetic, really–it’s not so bad and there are distinct advantages to it. I’ll leave it at that.

So, for me, no sex for the past 6 months. I don’t miss hygiene sex.

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**Author:** ![Cyberhwk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7993a0/32.png) [@Cyberhwk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cyberhwk)\
**Post date:** [October 12, 2009, 3:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-gone-without-sex-the-longest-and-the-shortest-amount-of-time-at-the-time-of-your-reply/513304/59 "2009-10-12T03:06:54Z")

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> [@Alice\_The\_Goon](#):
>
> The longest: January 2007 to… Friday night.
> 
> 🆒
> 
> The last time: 6 hours ago.
> 
> 😃

Congrats on breaking the dry spell.

**Myself:** 4 years. Interesting in that I realized the other night that I’ve actually turned down sex more than I’ve had it.

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**Author:** ![MsWhatsit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/eb8c5e/32.png) [@MsWhatsit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsWhatsit)\
**Post date:** [October 12, 2009, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-has-gone-without-sex-the-longest-and-the-shortest-amount-of-time-at-the-time-of-your-reply/513304/60 "2009-10-12T14:55:01Z")

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> [@eleanorigby](#):
>
> Well, for those of you who are puzzled as to how or why those here haven’t had sex for a while… I can’t speak for the others, but as for me, there’s sex and then there’s sex. I refuse to have what I call “hygiene sex” anymore. Hygiene sex is where neither party is all that emotionally interested in the other, but they want the release (this is not the same, I imagine as best friend with bennys, but I’m not of that generation), which 9 times out of 10 is release for him, not me, so why bother? IOW, I don’t have sex with my husband.

Two comments about this. One, the workings of your marriage are certainly your business, but I do find it somewhat odd to think of people being married to each other without being emotionally interested in each other. I mean, I know it happens, but you sound fairly satisfied and happy with this arrangement, which seems… well, odd. But like I said, your business.

Two, the term “hygiene sex” sounds like an oxymoron. 😉

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