# Who here is queer? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 14, 2000, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217 "2000-04-14T18:41:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![John\_Kentzel-Griffin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ccd318/32.png) [@John\_Kentzel-Griffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Kentzel-Griffin)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2000, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/61 "2000-04-17T16:44:00Z")
**neuro-trash grrrl** has already mentioned me on the first page. Just wanted to confirm - Yes, I am gay. **Cajun Man** and I have been partners for twenty years. * * * Virtually yours, “Feynman was wrong. I understand Quantum Physics completely. Anybody seen my drugs?” - A **WallyM7™**.sig ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2000, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/62 "2000-04-17T20:56:00Z")
Wow! Thanks for all the responses! So far we’ve got: **Members of the Elite:** [ul]Esprix Otto Sqrlcub Matt\_mcl Fogmage Neuro-trash grrrl DrMatrix Cajun Man Chef Troy Commander Fortune D-Bear Doobieous Jezebel Cowboy Greg El Gui Kricket the Scarlet opus (I think) Elthia Evilbeth Milroyj (if his boyfriend is, he must be, too - guilt by association) Psycat90 Kepi Slythe (I’d say omnisexual counts)[/ul] **Answer Refused or Coy:** [ul]Suzeanne SkySlash Eve redtail23[/ul] **Mostly straight:** [ul]BigRoryG Mangeorge (but Michael Masterson/Silo may get his day yet) Jazzmine (but would have a sex change for sqrlcub) SwimmingRiddles mega the roo Falcon[/ul] **The rest of those perverted straights:** [ul]Eh, who cares? :)[/ul] (By the way, to those straight men who said they were lesbians - it’s not original, and it’s not funny. Seriously. I’m surprised **neuro-trash** didn’t kick your ass for saying it.) **SqrlCub** wrote: > [@](#): > > I think Esprix took my prior roll of being the gay guy here. Sigh! He seems to post here more often anyway. It’s just a name - I hardly represent every gay person on this board. I just talk too much. 😃 > [@](#): > > I know of a few others Esprix, but don’t feel that I am at liberty to say who they are. No, no, please, no outing - that would be bad. I was just curious is all. (And no, not _bi-curious_ either! :p) **A girl** wrote: > [@](#): > > Esprix, I’m going to Japan in August, why don’t you go with me? Lots of Asians over there for you to choose from! {drool drool drool} Japanese men are _soooooooo_ hot sometimes. But, alas, I haven’t been overseas yet, and won’t be able to by August. I think, though, I’m making very nice use of the Asian men living in Philadelphia, and will continue to do so should I relocate to the even more Asian-populated San Diego. 🙂 **Cowboy Greg** wrote: > [@](#): > > ::sigh:: The Gay Guy doesn’t even notice that I’m gay. Men. Hmph. I’m sorry, honey! It’s just that I haven’t seen you post in a while to remind me you’re there, that’s all. You _know_ how I like cowboys… 🙂 **Elthia** wrote: > [@](#): > > I can’t believe so many people think asians can’t be attractive, and the way movies show them is shameful. Oh, I dunno - I can think of quite a few good attractive Asian characters and actors. Jet Li, Garrett Wang (who plays Harry Kim on “Star Trek: Voyager”), the guy on the TV series “The Crow” (not to mention Brandon Lee in the movie), Von Flores (who plays Agent Sandoval on “Earth: Final Conflict”), etc. Being an afficionado of Asian men, I know these things. 🙂 **Ghost** wrote: > [@](#): > > I’m not gay, but alot of gay guys come on to me. Must be my hair and good looks…who knows. Uh, yeah. Keep believing it, and maybe someday it’ll come true. :rolleyes: **evilbeth** wrote: > [@](#): > > I guess you could count me as bi if by “bi” you can mean you have had previous (enjoyable) experiences/relationships with women but are currently (married) in a monogamous relationship with a man but if anything were to happen, you would go for women just as often as you would men (?) If not, then I am straight. You’re bi, dear. Consider yourself blessed. 🙂 **DrMatrix** wrote: > [@](#): > > **Cajun Man** and I have been partners for twenty years. Woo hoo! Congratulations! That’s awesome! Esprix * * * ## [Ask the Gay Guy!](http://boards.straightdope.com/ubb/Forum7/HTML/001376.html) (or, if you prefer the Jesusfied version, [Asketh the damn Priest Guy!](http://www.askjesus.org/ask.cgi?http://boards.straightdope.com/ubb/Forum7/HTML/001376.html)) ## “Never assume a malicious intent when stupidity will explain just as well.” {This space reserved for a Genuine WallyM7 Sig™} ---
**Author:** ![Poto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7ab992/32.png) [@Poto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Poto)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2000, 10:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/63 "2000-04-17T22:38:00Z")
not me. the sunbear name came from an actual zoo sunbear some friends saw. go back to your regularly scheduled programming. ---
**Author:** ![Sue\_Duhnym](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/91b2a8/32.png) [@Sue\_Duhnym](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sue_Duhnym)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2000, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/64 "2000-04-17T23:16:00Z")
I’m not quite sure that I would call myself bi, but I have had two experiences with women. No relationships, just encounters. I’m married now with a kid and not ruling out another experience if hubby can watch. Esprix, you choose. * * * My kids brighten up our home. They never turn the lights off. - **A Wallyism** ---
**Author:** ![Patty\_O\_Furniture](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/96bed5/32.png) [@Patty\_O\_Furniture](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Patty_O_Furniture)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2000, 11:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/65 "2000-04-17T23:40:00Z")
Is this part of that census thing? ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2000, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/66 "2000-04-18T15:33:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by **Sue Duhnym** : > > I’m not quite sure that I would call myself bi, but I have had two experiences with women. No relationships, just encounters. I’m married now with a kid and not ruling out another experience if hubby can watch. > > Esprix, you choose. Me? :eek: Um, er, well, if you did twice before and are willing to again, I’d put you somewhere around a 1-2 on the Kinsey scale. Does that make you bisexual? Well, frankly, it’s only a label - only you can decide if you like it or not. So, are you bisexual, mostly straight, or just you? 🙂 > [@](#): > > Originally posted by **opus** : > > Is this part of that census thing? Yes… yes it is. 😉 Esprix * * * ## [Ask the Gay Guy!](http://boards.straightdope.com/ubb/Forum7/HTML/001376.html) (or, if you prefer the Jesusfied version, [Asketh the damn Priest Guy!](http://www.askjesus.org/ask.cgi?http://boards.straightdope.com/ubb/Forum7/HTML/001376.html)) ## “Never assume a malicious intent when stupidity will explain just as well.” {This space reserved for a Genuine WallyM7 Sig™} ---
**Author:** ![Trout\_Mask\_Replica](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a88e57/32.png) [@Trout\_Mask\_Replica](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trout_Mask_Replica)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2000, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/67 "2000-04-18T15:42:00Z")
I’m completely straight – never had a gay experience and have no desire to. Looking at the rest of this thread, I think this makes me some kind of freak. 🙂 * * * **TMR** _If you believed in yourself, and tore enough holes in your pants, there was always a mist-filled alley right around the corner._ ---
**Author:** ![redtail23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/3e96dc/32.png) [@redtail23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/redtail23)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2000, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/68 "2000-04-18T16:08:00Z")
Hey, wait a minute! I object! I did not refuse to answer and I did not intend to be coy. That is the best description I have of my personal situation. If you need a label, pick whichever one you want. Doesn’t matter to me. If “omnisexual” gets in, then I should too! On the other hand, after checking back through the posts, perhaps I’m in the right group after all. Never mind, Esprix. Hi SkySlash! Hello Eve! Howdy Suzeanne! * * * “Why can’t you take a little responsibility for your own actions?” “Because they would take away my National Denial Coalition card, not that i’m a member.” ---
**Author:** ![SqrlCub](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ea5d25/32.png) [@SqrlCub](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SqrlCub)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2000, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/69 "2000-04-18T18:23:00Z")
Well it looks like a few of the other gay people I know of came out here. There are actually several more. COME OUT, COME OUT, WHEREVER YOU ARE! 🙂 HUGS! Sqrl PS New York Dopers to include: DrMAtrix and Cajun Man, I will be in NYC for Gay Pride there.again this year. I will probably be marching with the GENX Bears. Maybe I will see you guys there. * * * [SqrlCub’s Arizona Adventure](http://boards.straightdope.com/ubb/Forum4/HTML/005351.html) ---
**Author:** ![SqrlCub](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ea5d25/32.png) [@SqrlCub](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SqrlCub)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2000, 6:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/70 "2000-04-18T18:24:00Z")
One other thing. I love you Jazzmine. You are still my favourite poster even though I haven’t seen you in a while. HUGS! Sqrl (I typoed my name… Sqrkl and thought it made my name sound annoyingly like a certain hated sitcom abomination. Hmmm…that could be an addition to my signature.) * * * [SqrlCub’s Arizona Adventure](http://boards.straightdope.com/ubb/Forum4/HTML/005351.html) ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2000, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/71 "2000-04-18T18:25:00Z")
Don’t speak too soon, **Trout Mask Replica** - freak is just as good as queer. {heh heh heh} 😃 **redtail23** wrote: > [@](#): > > I did not refuse to answer and I did not intend to be coy. That is the best description I have of my personal situation. > > If you need a label, pick whichever one you want. Doesn’t matter to me. > > If “omnisexual” gets in, then I should too! Well, you said: > [@](#): > > Omnisexual, hmmm? I don’t think I’ll go quite that far. > > I’ve always agreed with the statement made by a friend during our college days: “Redtail’s not homosexual and Redtail’s not heterosexual. Redtail is just plain sexual.” So you’re not straight, you’re not gay, it was unclear if bisexual would apply, and you don’t like omnisexual. I’d call that coy, wouldn’t you? 😛 > [@](#): > > On the other hand, after checking back through the posts, perhaps I’m in the right group after all. Never mind, Esprix. > Hi SkySlash! Hello Eve! Howdy Suzeanne! Well, they are fine company, no doubt! (Oh, and I hope **SkySlash** knows we’re just teasing him - I meant to make that clearer earlier. We know you’re straight, honey! It’s ok! I promise! :)) Esprix * * * ## [Ask the Gay Guy!](http://boards.straightdope.com/ubb/Forum7/HTML/001376.html) (or, if you prefer the Jesusfied version, [Asketh the damn Priest Guy!](http://www.askjesus.org/ask.cgi?http://boards.straightdope.com/ubb/Forum7/HTML/001376.html)) ## “Never assume a malicious intent when stupidity will explain just as well.” {This space reserved for a Genuine WallyM7 Sig™} ---
**Author:** ![Occam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Occam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Occam)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2000, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/72 "2000-04-18T18:41:00Z")
People always thought I was a little odd. * * * “Clatu, Verrata…nector?..neck-tie?” ---
**Author:** ![neuro-trash\_grrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/3ab097/32.png) [@neuro-trash\_grrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/neuro-trash_grrrl)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2000, 10:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/73 "2000-04-18T22:30:00Z")
> [@](#): > > (By the way, to those straight men who said they were lesbians - it’s not original, and it’s not funny. Seriously. I’m surprised neuro-trash didn’t kick your ass for saying it.) No, it isn’t original, it isn’t funny, and I actually was going to say something, not ass-kicking, but questioning, but I thought better of it, because I didn’t really want to muddy the waters. But since Esprix brought it up, I might as well. How much of your sexual orientation is based on who you are, and how much is based on who you aren’t, but wish you were? I can’t speak for the gay and lesbian community at large, but the term “male lesbian” is a term that I, personally, recognize as a valid expression of sexual orientation. I always defined it as a man who is so attracted to women that he wants to become one. In other words, a transgendered heterosexual male. My question is, how many of you guys who responded in this way actually seriously want to get fitted for silicone implants and give up the sperm habit forever? If you do, the term fits you. If you don’t, you’re a straight guy. It isn’t a big deal to me. Quite frankly I don’t care what you call yourself, but I thought I’d get that cleared up. On the other hand, it does say something about the levels of tolerance, however grudging, granted lesbians as compared to those granted gay men in patriarchies (which the U.S. still remains, despite over a century of feminist progress), but this is most decidedly not the place to get into that… * * * Heck is where you go when you don’t believe in Gosh. ---
**Author:** ![Suzeanne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6bbea6/32.png) [@Suzeanne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Suzeanne)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2000, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/74 "2000-04-18T23:45:00Z")
Huh. I figured that pretty much everyone already knew that I was … Well, dammit, I just don’t like “bi-sexual.” I’m sexual, dammit. I like men, I like women, not necessarily in that order. I don’t particularly prefer either, it’s just a matter of who is attractive and fits my type. That a clarification? ---
**Author:** ![mangeorge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d78d45/32.png) [@mangeorge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mangeorge)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2000, 12:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/75 "2000-04-19T00:02:00Z")
## “Mangeorge (but Michael Masterson/Silo may get his day yet)” —Esprix Nah, Silo’s safe. I’m a big bluff, is all. I was just picking on him because of some of his alter-ego’s posts. 😉 I’ve explored, in my mind, the possibility of sex with a man. But it honestly dosen’t turn me on. Don’t get me wrong, some men **are** awfully pretty (ie, Mel Gibson 😃 ), but not in a real world sexual way. Who here would be queer, if stuck on a “Desert Island” with just another of the same sex? Peace, mangeorge * * * Teach your kids to bungee jump. One them might have to cross a bridge someday. ---
**Author:** ![Doobieous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/da6949/32.png) [@Doobieous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doobieous)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2000, 4:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/76 "2000-04-19T04:02:00Z")
This is a cool thread Esprix. I had only known of a very small number of gay/bi/lesbian/omnisexual posters on the board, so it’s great to see the amount that we do have here. Good job dude! 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Chef\_Troy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/85f322/32.png) [@Chef\_Troy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chef_Troy)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2000, 4:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/77 "2000-04-19T04:21:00Z")
I’ve always thought the term “ambisexual” would be a better term for someone who is attracted to either sex than “bisexual,” which to me always has a connotation of both, simultaneously. Not that there’s anything wrong with that… _grin_ It works if you equate it to “ambidextrous,” not so well if you equate it to “ambivalent.” for more scintillating information on bisexuality, not to mention more than you EVER wanted to know about Chef Troy, stop by [**Ask Bi Guy.**](http://boards.straightdope.com/ubb/Forum7/HTML/001515.html) Lots of people claim it cured their dandruff…I can’t confirm or deny it. * * * Live a Lush Life Da Chef ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2000, 1:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/78 "2000-04-19T13:41:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by **neuro-trash grrrl** : > > How much of your sexual orientation is based on who you are, and how much is based on who you aren’t, but wish you were? From the rest of your post, I’m assuming you’re talking about the topics of gender identity and sexual orientation. I discussed this a bit in my **Gay Guy** thread if you want to check it out. > [@](#): > > I can’t speak for the gay and lesbian community at large, but the term “male lesbian” is a term that I, personally, recognize as a valid expression of sexual orientation. I always defined it as a man who is so attracted to women that he wants to become one. In other words, a transgendered heterosexual male. “Male lesbian” would be a misnomer, then. Once a man goes through a sex change he’s no longer a man - he’s a woman. And that woman might be a lesbian. A man would never be so attracted to a woman that he wants to become one - by saying that, you’re implying that his sexual orientation (attracted to women) would drive his gender identity (wanting to be a woman). As hard as it is to wrap your mind around (trust me, it was hard for me), _gender identity and sexual orientation are completely seperate issues_. For example, my friend Rachel was born a man, but knew he was a woman. He was also attracted to women, so that makes him, now that he is a woman, a lesbian. But the two work independently of each other - becoming a woman does not affect whether he is attracted to women or not. I explain it poorly, and I’m sure there are others who can do a better job. I also believe there’s a third issue (sexual identity?), but I cannot speak on that at all. > [@](#): > > My question is, how many of you guys who responded in this way actually seriously want to get fitted for silicone implants and give up the sperm habit forever? If you do, the term fits you. If you don’t, you’re a straight guy. None of them, and that’s what bugged me - they’re just being snide and insulting, IMHO. “I’m a lesbian, huh huh huh.” :rolleyes: Whatever. Like dykes need the likes of you. 🙂 > [@](#): > > On the other hand, it does say something about the levels of tolerance, however grudging, granted lesbians as compared to those granted gay men in patriarchies (which the U.S. still remains, despite over a century of feminist progress), but this is most decidedly not the place to get into that… Ooo, but that does sound like fun! Bring it up in the **Gay Guy** thread if you like, or start a seperate issue. I think it could be interesting, and I have my own theories as well. 🙂 Esprix * * * ## [Ask the Gay Guy!](http://boards.straightdope.com/ubb/Forum7/HTML/001376.html) (or, if you prefer the Jesusfied version, [Asketh the damn Priest Guy!](http://www.askjesus.org/ask.cgi?http://boards.straightdope.com/ubb/Forum7/HTML/001376.html)) ## “Never assume a malicious intent when stupidity will explain just as well.” {This space reserved for a Genuine WallyM7 Sig™} ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2000, 1:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/79 "2000-04-19T13:46:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by **Suzeanne** : > > I just don’t like “bi-sexual.” I’m sexual, dammit. I like men, I like women, not necessarily in that order. I don’t particularly prefer either, it’s just a matter of who is attractive and fits my type. Well, technically, that _does_ make you bisexual, but if you don’t like the term, don’t use it. Does “queer” suit you? It’s kind of all-encompassing. 🙂 As **Chef Troy** said: > [@](#): > > I’ve always thought the term “ambisexual” would be a better term for someone who is attracted to either sex than “bisexual,” which to me always has a connotation of both, simultaneously. Not that there’s anything wrong with that… _grin_ True, even more so since sexual identity runs along so many other variations than just “male” and “female” and “straight” and “gay” anymore. And, yes, the **Bi Guy** thread is well worth checking out, especially for you who are questioning, or just _mostly_ straight. 😃 Esprix * * * ## [Ask the Gay Guy!](http://boards.straightdope.com/ubb/Forum7/HTML/001376.html) (or, if you prefer the Jesusfied version, [Asketh the damn Priest Guy!](http://www.askjesus.org/ask.cgi?http://boards.straightdope.com/ubb/Forum7/HTML/001376.html)) ## “Never assume a malicious intent when stupidity will explain just as well.” {This space reserved for a Genuine WallyM7 Sig™} ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2000, 1:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/80 "2000-04-19T13:49:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by **mangeorge** : > > Who here would be queer, if stuck on a “Desert Island” with just another of the same sex? Oh, please - given long enough, everyone would turn the other cheek, as t’were, including me. Particularly men - they’re just pigs. Oink, I say; oink. Esprix * * * ## [Ask the Gay Guy!](http://boards.straightdope.com/ubb/Forum7/HTML/001376.html) (or, if you prefer the Jesusfied version, [Asketh the damn Priest Guy!](http://www.askjesus.org/ask.cgi?http://boards.straightdope.com/ubb/Forum7/HTML/001376.html)) ## “Never assume a malicious intent when stupidity will explain just as well.” {This space reserved for a Genuine WallyM7 Sig™} [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217.md?page=5)