# Who here is queer? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 14, 2000, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217 "2000-04-14T18:41:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 7
**Author:** ![Ashtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9fc29f/32.png) [@Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ashtar)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2000, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/121 "2000-11-22T22:01:51Z")
I’m not gay. Just -really- faggoty! ---
**Author:** ![redtail23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/3e96dc/32.png) [@redtail23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/redtail23)\ **Post date:** [November 22, 2000, 10:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/122 "2000-11-22T22:36:18Z")
Hiya Esprix! Y’know, I opened this up to take a look at what was happening & why it had resurfaced, and there was a whole reply just to me that I’d never seen! Of course, then I had to go back and re-read the original posts, because I couldn’t remember what had been said. And I still can’t for the life of me remember exactly what I was so annoyed about nor why, even after reading my own explanation. 😃 But I do know that I wasn’t really offended, even at the time. Kiss and make up? (After all, _any_ excuse is a good excuse, even if it’s months old, right? ;)) But to (very tardily) answer some of your questions: Most of my previous posts were in the same semi-joking vein as yours. For some reason, that one thing apparently irked me a bit, and I always get intrigued when I react to something that I know isn’t really serious and isn’t that important, even if it’s not a particularly strong reaction. Usually means there’s something lurking that I might need to contemplate. Personally, I don’t really worry that much about my gender identity vs my sexual identity vs my sexual orientation vs my sexual personage vs etc etc etc. I’ve seen some of your posts on this subject in other threads, and I can understand how it can be useful for certain communications and/or certain people, but it’s nothing that I’m likely to need or do. And I VERY rarely worry about other people’s thoughts on same. 😉 Like I said, I think the statements that I made probably just work much better in person. They don’t translate well to this medium; how well can you understand when you can’t see how lecherously I’m leering at you and that cute chick in the corner, both at the same time? 😉 And the “problem” I referred to (“people wouldn’t have a problem”) was the problem of misunderstanding my comments (or more, even needing to ask the question), not that I really thought you had some problem with me or my sexuality. Looking back, I suspect that part of my reaction was due to the reception (as a bisexual, and later as polyamorous) that I’ve gotten from the gay community in the past. Although I realize that you meant it in good fun, it wasn’t the first time that I’ve been told that I didn’t count or wasn’t included as part of that community. But, y’know, even the student association here changed sometime back from GLA (Gay/Lesbian Association) to GLBTA to cover the bi’s and tran’s, and we’re way behind the times hereabouts. Perhaps a bit of a chip on my shoulder that I need to take off? See, that’s why I get so intrigued with these things. But I do like ‘queer’ and I think I may start using it. It’s taken me a while to get used to it being a _good_ word instead of a bad one, but I do like the inclusiveness factor. Queer freak - yup, that’s probably as close as you’ll get to finding a nutshell for me. 😛 TOCOTOX: Poly-speak, for “TOo COmplicated TO eXplain here & now”. Can be really handy when you don’t have time or aren’t particularly interested in trying to explain some intricate, concatenative relationship that you’re involved in. COY: Ummm, good question! I know the dictionary definition, but it’s really the connotations that caused the problem. I think I link it with ‘coquetry’, in the sense of someone vain and shallow, who is just using sex (flirting) to get attention. Someone who doesn’t really care about hurting other people, as long as they’re the center of attention. I get a mental picture of a bleached-blonde, trailer-trash bimbo keeping several guys on a string so that they’ll all buy her stuff, never actually following through with her advertised intents, with no qualms about possible consequences or their feelings. (OK, it takes a lot longer to explain that picture than to run it thru my head.) Sheesh! Such a lot to pack into such a little word! And where did all of that come from? I haven’t the foggiest. [/quote] Boy howdy, but you’re right. Those conversion threads are a nightmare! Be a good boy over the long weekend and start a new one with a summary list at the top. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![El\_Gui](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/35a633/32.png) [@El\_Gui](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Gui)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2000, 10:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/123 "2000-12-20T22:20:00Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Otto \* > \*\*El Gui is another homo. But he seems to have disappeared on us. \*\* I’m Here! I’m Queer! sorry so late, took forever to get ready . . . were’s the party? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![andygirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a9adbd/32.png) [@andygirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andygirl)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2000, 11:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/124 "2000-12-20T23:43:13Z")
I think I might be a lesbian. Quietgirl? Want to test this theory? ---
**Author:** ![quietgirldownthehall](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/839c29/32.png) [@quietgirldownthehall](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/quietgirldownthehall)\ **Post date:** [December 20, 2000, 11:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/125 "2000-12-20T23:47:24Z")
Well, let’s see. \ Ummmmmmm… Let’s do more tests. I’ll get back to you. ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2000, 1:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/126 "2000-12-21T01:02:17Z")
[porky pig] B-B-B-B-B-B- I like both sexes! [/porky pig] ---
**Author:** ![MsRobyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/90ced4/32.png) [@MsRobyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsRobyn)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2000, 1:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/127 "2000-12-21T01:32:34Z")
I’m not a lesbian, and the thought has crossed my mind, but when the opportunity has presented itself, I lose my nerve. ☹ Robin ---
**Author:** ![fish\_in\_the\_sky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/7ba0ec/32.png) [@fish\_in\_the\_sky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fish_in_the_sky)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2000, 5:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/128 "2000-12-21T05:14:07Z")
Bi. And y’all here are the first real live human beings I’ve ‘come out’ to. (gulp) 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Rieux](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/aeb1de/32.png) [@Dr.Rieux](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Rieux)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2000, 5:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/129 "2000-12-21T05:39:43Z")
Bisexual male–but I prefer Rita Mae Brown’s lovely word, “pansexual.” That oughta inspire a few bad puns from you pervs;). (Especially involving the name “Chef Troy.”) ---
**Author:** ![bagkitty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7ab992/32.png) [@bagkitty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bagkitty)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2000, 1:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/130 "2000-12-21T13:01:06Z")
Census time again? Count me in. 6 on the Kinsey scale, which definitely makes me gay… as to queer… there is a picture of bagkitty in all the better illustrated dictionaries right next to the entry for queer (actually, damn odd would be a much more appropriate label). On a related note, when I joined the club I was promised a toaster. I am still waiting, I suspect some unscrupulous type has two… Esprix, can you look into this for me? ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2000, 3:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/131 "2000-12-21T15:00:44Z")
Ooo, I love getting bumped. 😉 **El Gui** , it’s about frickin’ time. I have been _waiting_… {taps foot impatiently} Well, alright - you _do_ look stunning, so I suppose we’ll let it slide. You queens… 😉 **andygirl** and **quietgirl** , you know, you have _dorm rooms_ for these kinds of things. You think we queer boys really want to see your, um, “testing procedures?” EW! 😉 **iampunha** , I had no idea. Cool! 😉 **Lunatic13** , we’re honored. Welcome to the wonderful world of, um, well, a wonderful world! 😃 **bagkitty** , don’t ask me - must be held up somewhere in shipping. I have the Fabulous Customer Service Department number if you need it… Esprix ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2000, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/132 "2000-12-21T15:14:50Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Esprix \* > **iampunha** , I had no idea. Cool! 😉 > \*\* Yeah . . . my roommate and I are two of the most straight non-hets I’ve ever met. Although he is obsessed with cleaning . . . hell, I have 0 fashion sense. He’s not much better. hehehe:) ---
**Author:** ![Polycarp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/82dd89/32.png) [@Polycarp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polycarp)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2000, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/133 "2000-12-21T15:28:36Z")
Esprix commented: > [@](#): > > andygirl and quietgirl, you know, you have dorm rooms for these kinds of things. You think we queer boys really want to see your, um, “testing procedures?” EW! Hey, y’better watch out, or they’ll stomp you with their Birkenstocks! Or run over you with the U-haul (you girls are past your second date, right?) 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Griffin-Kentzel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/larry_griffin-kentzel/32/14787_2.png) [@Larry\_Griffin-Kentzel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Griffin-Kentzel)\ **Post date:** [December 21, 2000, 3:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/134 "2000-12-21T15:40:24Z")
I was gay under UBB…and I’m still gay under vB! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Xploder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/a183cd/32.png) [@Xploder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Xploder)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2000, 2:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/135 "2000-12-22T02:58:46Z")
Might as well chime in and state that both myself and Mrs X are bisexual and avid swingers. And don’t particularly care who does or doesn’t know. There. I said it. Nyah. Xploder ---
**Author:** ![Deacons\_Trucked](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d78d45/32.png) [@Deacons\_Trucked](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Deacons_Trucked)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2000, 4:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/136 "2000-12-22T04:35:40Z")
Gay. NOT _queer_…I hate that friggin word. As I have mentioned before. Oh wait…I’m not gay, my boyfriend is. ---
**Author:** ![SpinneZiege](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9e8a1a/32.png) [@SpinneZiege](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SpinneZiege)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2000, 4:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/137 "2000-12-22T04:43:47Z")
I’m queer as in “Are you smokin’ dope?” (as my psychologist so politely asked me this afternoon). Yet, in terms of sexuality, I’m so straight I still get off to that Farah Fawcette poster. ---
**Author:** ![waterj2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/858c86/32.png) [@waterj2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/waterj2)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2000, 6:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/138 "2000-12-22T06:52:48Z")
I’m still in the closet. Don’t tell anyone. What? Oh, crap. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Emperor\_Penguin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c2a13f/32.png) [@Emperor\_Penguin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Emperor_Penguin)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2000, 7:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/139 "2000-12-22T07:44:20Z")
Ya know this is the first time I’ve said this publicly, but let me just say, FTR, that my porch door swings both ways. Just thought you all might want to know! (Now to tell my friends and family…) ---
**Author:** ![hedra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/779978/32.png) [@hedra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hedra)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2000, 1:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217/140 "2000-12-22T13:52:40Z")
Okay, I fess up. Bi, but rather more on the straight side, and never actually managed to have a ‘relationship’ (or anything else, for that matter) with a woman, though fell in love a few times, always at the wrong time, and only got good offers when I was dating someone else… why is that? And I’m good and married, now. Only a small regret, 'cause **epeepunk** is a gem, and besides, he helpfully points out hot babes to me when he notices them (which I find charming for some reason). And **Esprix** , I didn’t mention it when we met because … I _forgot_! That may seem weird, but heck, I sometimes forgot I was pregnant when I was about 5-7 months along with my son, too. (Ask **epeepunk** , my brain is mighty strange…) I did remember during our lunch, but it then seemed both awkward to suddenly insert the info, and also relatively irrelevant. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-is-queer/16217.md?page=6)