# Who here knows about Crystal River, FL? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [July 23, 2006, 6:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-knows-about-crystal-river-fl/365687 "2006-07-23T06:54:50Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 13\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Bambi\_Hassenpfeffer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Bambi\_Hassenpfeffer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bambi_Hassenpfeffer)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2006, 6:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-knows-about-crystal-river-fl/365687/1 "2006-07-23T06:54:50Z")
So. Monday, I leave for Crystal River for work. I’m being sent there for the week (because I was a bad person in a former life), and I want to know what the hell there is to do up around there. Having been a little kid on the Suncoast, I know about Homosassa Springs (and fully intend to go, if only for nostalgia’s sake), but what else? Crystal River State Park looks really pretty, but that won’t take but a couple hours. However, as much as I love Florida’s nature (and I do, honestly), there’s only so much of it I can take when it’s almost 100 outside. So, what else? My schedule has me arriving Monday night, working T - F from 1 to 11p, and fleeing for home sometime on Saturday. Anyone around here know anything about Crystal River and environs, anything I should see while I’m there? ---
**Author:** ![NinetyWt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/cc9497/32.png) [@NinetyWt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NinetyWt)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2006, 9:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-knows-about-crystal-river-fl/365687/2 "2006-07-23T09:10:29Z")
I don’t know about Crystal River, but I know … just be yourself. Really. You’ll be fine. People like you. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![bittersweet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/c57346/32.png) [@bittersweet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bittersweet)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2006, 2:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-knows-about-crystal-river-fl/365687/3 "2006-07-23T14:31:37Z")
I don’t know a lot, but I know there ain’t a lot to know! As far as shopping goes, maybe just stick to shopping online while you’re there; I think the nearest Wal-Mart is in Homosassa. You may want to visit the Crystal River Wine & Cheese Company or go on a [Manatee Swim](http://www.sunshinerivertours.com/). Whatever you do, enjoy your trip! ---
**Author:** ![dmatsch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3be4f8/32.png) [@dmatsch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dmatsch)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2006, 2:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-knows-about-crystal-river-fl/365687/4 "2006-07-24T14:41:54Z")
Pasco county resident here (that would be two counties below CR). There is niether nothing nor nobody to do up there. Bring DVDs and porn. ---
**Author:** ![Bambi\_Hassenpfeffer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Bambi\_Hassenpfeffer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bambi_Hassenpfeffer)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2006, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-knows-about-crystal-river-fl/365687/5 "2006-07-24T14:58:01Z")
**NinetyWt** : :o \<-- that’s me, blushing. You’re too nice. **bittersweet** and **dmatsch** : I was afraid that’s how it was going to be. If you don’t mind me asking, what part of Pasco are you in, **dmatsch**? I’ve spent quite a bit of time up there, both for work and for social reasons. They have a Kmart and a Waldenbooks. That about covers it for retail… It’s gonna be a long week. ---
**Author:** ![WOOKINPANUB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wookinpanub/32/132_2.png) [@WOOKINPANUB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WOOKINPANUB)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2006, 3:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-knows-about-crystal-river-fl/365687/6 "2006-07-24T15:19:31Z")
I was going to suggest the manatee swim, followed by dvds and porn. I think that about covers it. ---
**Author:** ![mrklutz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ebca7d/32.png) [@mrklutz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mrklutz)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2006, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-knows-about-crystal-river-fl/365687/7 "2006-07-24T15:31:33Z")
Way back in the Pleistocene when I was in college, I took a scuba class for a P.E. elective. We did our final dive trip to Crystal River. Great scuba diving, but the town itself is pretty blah, I have to agree. The highlight of the trip was cave diving at night, about 60 feet down. ---
**Author:** ![RTA](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b4bc9f/32.png) [@RTA](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTA)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2006, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-knows-about-crystal-river-fl/365687/8 "2006-07-24T16:33:43Z")
[http://www.floridakayakcompany.com/](http://www.floridakayakcompany.com/) ---
**Author:** ![Bambi\_Hassenpfeffer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Bambi\_Hassenpfeffer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bambi_Hassenpfeffer)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2006, 4:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-knows-about-crystal-river-fl/365687/9 "2006-07-25T04:28:55Z")
Two observations: 1. There really ain’t much to see here. Ft Island Beach is kinda pretty, and it has a lovely view of the nuclear power plant. Other than that, Crystal River doesn’t impress. 2. The water here tastes like rocks. ---
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2006, 12:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-knows-about-crystal-river-fl/365687/10 "2006-07-25T12:40:13Z")
I think you can get to Cedar Key from there fairly easily. Maybe not. Anyway, Cedar Key is not really all that, either. But it has it’s charms for one day, maybe, in a kitschy sort of way. Is it far from there to Ocala? The “downtown” (snerk) part of Ocala is semi-lively. Might be worth a field trip. Other than that, you’re a shining beacon in the wilderness. May others live by your example. ---
**Author:** ![Auntbeast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Auntbeast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Auntbeast)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2006, 1:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-knows-about-crystal-river-fl/365687/11 "2006-07-25T13:16:54Z")
I used to live in Otter Creek which is a bit north of there. I now live in the armpit that is Tampa, most of my experience is driving through Crystal River. Eat. Eat the clams they raise in Cedar Key, wallow around in some mullet dip, drink sweet tea. When all else fails grab a book and some grub. There are plenty of gift shops/shopping stuff and a mall, if you are into that. I’m a country girl, so your week sounds like heaven. Just remember to duck if you hear the siren. The directions for nuclear meltdown are posted on a power pole at about 6 point type, 30 feet from the road, on a sign thats less than 3ft tall. Take comfort, you will be in the first wave. ---
**Author:** ![dmatsch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3be4f8/32.png) [@dmatsch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dmatsch)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2006, 1:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-knows-about-crystal-river-fl/365687/12 "2006-07-25T13:32:51Z")
Bambi, I’m in Port Richey. The social capitol of Pasco. If you get really bored this week, send me off a message. Always a pleasure to meet another Straight Doper. ---
**Author:** ![Bambi\_Hassenpfeffer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Bambi\_Hassenpfeffer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bambi_Hassenpfeffer)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2006, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-here-knows-about-crystal-river-fl/365687/13 "2006-07-25T14:49:33Z")
[QUOTE=Auntbeast] Eat. Eat the clams they raise in Cedar Key, wallow around in some mullet dip, drink sweet tea. When all else fails grab a book and some grub. There are plenty of gift shops/shopping stuff and a mall, if you are into that. I’m a country girl, so your week sounds like heaven. Just remember to duck if you hear the siren. The directions for nuclear meltdown are posted on a power pole at about 6 point type, 30 feet from the road, on a sign thats less than 3ft tall. Take comfort, you will be in the first wave. [/QUOTE] I am decidedly a city boy, so heaven is not the word that springs immediately to mind. I went to the mall, and isn’t it something? The food court looks like the circus. While I’m at work today, I’ll ask about local seafood places to see what’s around. Also, I had seen those warning sirens everywhere, and I knew the power plant was here, but I hadn’t put the two together until you said that. **Shibb** , Cedar Key is actually _another hour_ north of here. I had already thought about going up there, but the distance killed that idea in infancy.