# Who is the stupidest person in a commercial? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [September 28, 2010, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-is-the-stupidest-person-in-a-commercial/555298 "2010-09-28T01:38:51Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Biggirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biggirl/32/3294_2.png) [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2010, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-is-the-stupidest-person-in-a-commercial/555298/1 "2010-09-28T01:38:51Z")
It’s hard to top those ‘as seen on TV’ ads. The person who can’t pour a pot of spaghetti into a colander was pretty dumb but he was surpassed by the Snuggi woman whose feet are cold because she’s to dumb to know how to use a blanket. But there’s a new commercial for Pep Boys or AAMCO where people come into the shop and verbalize the weird sounds their cars are making. All these people look like Stephen Hawkings compared to the woman sitting in her car who tells the mechanic, “This light came on and I don’t know what it means.” and the mechanic says, “That’s your check engine light.” and didn’t add, “Idiot.” ---
**Author:** ![Sailboat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sailboat/32/461_2.png) [@Sailboat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sailboat)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2010, 1:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-is-the-stupidest-person-in-a-commercial/555298/2 "2010-09-28T01:40:10Z")
Typically it’s the husband. Pretty much _any_ husband, _any_ commercial. ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2010, 2:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-is-the-stupidest-person-in-a-commercial/555298/3 "2010-09-28T02:08:04Z")
Dad. I would argue that Dad is dumber than Husband. ---
**Author:** ![Meeko](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e495f1/32.png) [@Meeko](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Meeko)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2010, 2:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-is-the-stupidest-person-in-a-commercial/555298/4 "2010-09-28T02:08:28Z")
There was a series of Sonic Drive In Commercials with the same male driver and a random passenger. Parked at one of the parking spots for the restaurant, the two would have a conversation about what ever item was being advertised. The driver would be so off and so stupid about something rather obvious, and the two would discuss the misunderstanding to comedic effect. Then Sonic cashed in all of their chips on the 100% Juice Apple Smoothies [Some apple product] " stupid " Male driver customer: 100% Juice? That’s more juice than is in an apple Other customer: No it’s not Payoff / Punchline: Yeah it is, I mean, the stem and the seeds have to make up what, 3% of the apple, right? Response :: You know, this is the best argument of yours you have ever had. The line works, because if you were aware of the campaign you KNEW that he was cast to be stupid. Sonic wanted to cash that check and essentially confirm what we have all been thinking. - But yes, the Black and White [Always Black and White] “” before “” segments in Infomercials are in a class of their own. ---
**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2010, 2:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-is-the-stupidest-person-in-a-commercial/555298/5 "2010-09-28T02:56:03Z")
> [@JohnT](#): > > Dad. I would argue that Dad is dumber than Husband. Dad is not dumber than Can’t Make Pancakes Wife. Dad is going to choke the fuck out of her unless he gets some pancakes, though. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2010, 3:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-is-the-stupidest-person-in-a-commercial/555298/6 "2010-09-28T03:03:16Z")
Can we count the infomercial people, for whom everyday tasks present an insurmountable challenge? I keep waiting for the fecking telethon, but it never comes. ---
**Author:** ![antonio107](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/7ea924/32.png) [@antonio107](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/antonio107)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2010, 3:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-is-the-stupidest-person-in-a-commercial/555298/7 "2010-09-28T03:16:54Z")
> [@Larry\_Mudd](#): > > Can we count the infomercial people, for whom everyday tasks present an insurmountable challenge? > > I keep waiting for the fecking telethon, but it never comes. My favorite has to be the infomercials a few years back for the “Chef Tony” set of kitchen knives. “Do you HATE cutting fresh bread with dull knives, only to have squished bread?” Says the announcer. Meanwhile, the idiot in the black and white demonstration is putting about 50 pounds of pressure on the loaf with his left hand, while the knife in his right hand is finishing off ruining this loaf. Buddy, you don’t need a sharper set of knives! What you need to do is lighten up on your serial rapist’s grip! 😕 ---
**Author:** ![Manduck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/manduck/32/256_2.png) [@Manduck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Manduck)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2010, 3:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-is-the-stupidest-person-in-a-commercial/555298/8 "2010-09-28T03:23:45Z")
> [@antonio107](#): > > Buddy, you don’t need a sharper set of knives! What you need to do is lighten up on your serial rapist’s grip! 😕 If I had a dollar for every time I’ve heard that … ---
**Author:** ![K364](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/k364/32/5_2.png) [@K364](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/K364)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2010, 3:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-is-the-stupidest-person-in-a-commercial/555298/9 "2010-09-28T03:28:45Z")
Who’s the stupidest person in a commercial? Easy - the Caucasian male. What do I win? ---
**Author:** ![AClockworkMelon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aclockworkmelon/32/10803_2.png) [@AClockworkMelon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AClockworkMelon)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2010, 3:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-is-the-stupidest-person-in-a-commercial/555298/10 "2010-09-28T03:43:48Z")
> [@Manduck](#): > > > [@antonio107](#): > > > > Buddy, you don’t need a sharper set of knives! What you need to do is lighten up on your serial rapist’s grip! 😕 > > If I had a dollar for every time I’ve heard that … _Golfclap._ ---
**Author:** ![Robot\_Arm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robot_arm/32/18280_2.png) [@Robot\_Arm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Robot_Arm)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2010, 3:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-is-the-stupidest-person-in-a-commercial/555298/11 "2010-09-28T03:56:06Z")
There was one from several years ago for some sort of windows. Two women are inside the house; one is admiring the windows and the other tells her about them. Through the window, we can see husband trying to light a barbecue grill. It explodes, and by the end of the commercial the backyard looks like a war zone. That’s right, he has not mastered fire. In terms of human technological history, that predates the fucking wheel. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2010, 4:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-is-the-stupidest-person-in-a-commercial/555298/12 "2010-09-28T04:04:48Z")
1. The Geico boss 2. All those anonymous people who can’t stand upright without their magic ionic bracelet. 3. Bob’s ladies (you know Bob, who uses those pills for male enhancement\_ 4. Bob. 5. The boner pill couples who always seem to install twin bathtubs in their yards or their decks. 6. The people who take those pills for some minor ailment, even though death is listed like 4 times among the possible side effects. 7. Keith Stone. ---
**Author:** ![Jenaroph](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e8c25b/32.png) [@Jenaroph](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jenaroph)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2010, 4:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-is-the-stupidest-person-in-a-commercial/555298/13 "2010-09-28T04:35:32Z")
> [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > 1. The boner pill couples who always seem to install twin bathtubs in their yards or their decks. Or on the beach. And they never have any plumbing running to or from the tubs. Sweetie suggested we dress as the twin bathtub people for Halloween; I’m vetoing that, not because it wouldn’t be funny, but because I don’t want to be fumbling around wearing a fake bathtub at a crowded party all night. My personal vote for dumbest commercial character is an oldie but goodie: an AOL ad circa '96 where a guy related that “a friend of mine suggested I sign up for AOL. I said, ‘Why? I _have_ a computer.’” Uhh…yes, that’s probably why he suggested it. I’d like to see you use it without one. The guy wasn’t even supposed to come across as stupid. I’m not sure who it was aimed at. Stupid people who wanted to get online with this newfangled interwebs thing they kept hearing about but didn’t realize you needed a computer to do so? Stupid people who thought that simply owning a computer meant you were already on them newfangled interwebs? Of course, knowing what most people know now about AOL, perhaps he was smarter than I thought. ---
**Author:** ![J\_Cubed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/c6cbf5/32.png) [@J\_Cubed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/J_Cubed)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2010, 4:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-is-the-stupidest-person-in-a-commercial/555298/14 "2010-09-28T04:46:18Z")
Corona drinkers. There they are, on a beautiful beach, looking out at the ocean (or frolicking babes), holding a beer. And holding it. And still holding a full beer with a lime wedged in the top. Okay, now it’s getting warm. And, yep, I’m calling it, Corona at that temperature is pretty much just piss. ETA: I love acting out Black-n-White-o-Vision in real life. Common household tasks are just so **frustrating**! ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2010, 5:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-is-the-stupidest-person-in-a-commercial/555298/15 "2010-09-28T05:01:17Z")
> [@J\_Cubed](#): > > Corona drinkers. There they are, on a beautiful beach, looking out at the ocean (or frolicking babes), holding a beer. And holding it. And still holding a full beer with a lime wedged in the top. Okay, now it’s getting warm. And, yep, I’m calling it, Corona at that temperature is pretty much just piss. True, it has to be ice cold. And Pacifico’s better (and cheaper) anyway. ---
**Author:** ![etv78](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/d78d45/32.png) [@etv78](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/etv78)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2010, 5:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-is-the-stupidest-person-in-a-commercial/555298/16 "2010-09-28T05:36:51Z")
Kids in medical commercials MAKE ME CRAZY!!! KIDS DON’T TALK LIKE THAT!!! ---
**Author:** ![antonio107](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/7ea924/32.png) [@antonio107](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/antonio107)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2010, 5:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-is-the-stupidest-person-in-a-commercial/555298/17 "2010-09-28T05:36:56Z")
> [@AClockworkMelon](#): > > > [@Manduck](#): > > > > If I had a dollar for every time I’ve heard that … > > _Golfclap._ Yes, I too would like to congratulate **Manduck** on that gem. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![HeadNinja](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b4bc9f/32.png) [@HeadNinja](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HeadNinja)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2010, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-is-the-stupidest-person-in-a-commercial/555298/18 "2010-09-28T18:33:48Z")
Though I know it is the core of the joke, I’m going to nominate the guys from the new Miller lite commercials. The ones made to look like eHarmony ads. In which the guy explains to the viewer how finally finding this beer has made his life complete, filling a void the supermodel next to him could not. I’ve spent the last thirty years being told beer will make irresistible to beautiful women. Now I am being told that beer is the actual goal. I don’t like cognitive dissonance in my beer commercials. ---
**Author:** ![Susanann](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/7ab992/32.png) [@Susanann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Susanann)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2010, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-is-the-stupidest-person-in-a-commercial/555298/19 "2010-09-28T18:36:51Z")
> [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > 1. Bob’s ladies (you know Bob, who uses those pills for male enhancement\_ > . Another vote for Bob’s ladies. ---
**Author:** ![Malthus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/85f322/32.png) [@Malthus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malthus)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2010, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-is-the-stupidest-person-in-a-commercial/555298/20 "2010-09-28T18:38:45Z")
> [@Manduck](#): > > > [@antonio107](#): > > > > Buddy, you don’t need a sharper set of knives! What you need to do is lighten up on your serial rapist’s grip! 😕 > > If I had a dollar for every time I’ve heard that … If they can still say stuff, obviously the grip isn’t working. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-is-the-stupidest-person-in-a-commercial/555298.md?page=2)