# Who the hell lets their children call that late at night? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [April 9, 2004, 12:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-the-hell-lets-their-children-call-that-late-at-night/239166 "2004-04-09T12:44:04Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![lezlers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/258eb7/32.png) [@lezlers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lezlers)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2004, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-the-hell-lets-their-children-call-that-late-at-night/239166/61 "2004-04-10T18:21:05Z")
> [@Infectious Lass](#): > > And yet again Lezlers comes out with the ‘if you live at home after the age of 12 you’re EEEEEEVIL’ shit :rolleyes: So sorry, didn’t realize I’d come out with a mantra. When did I say someone was EEEEEEVIL for living at home after the age of 12? > [@](#): > > If that kids living at home when they’re 30 remark was a crack at me, Sorry to burst your bubble sweetheart, but I had no clue you lived at home. I don’t even know who the fuck you are, so no, it wasn’t a crack at you. It wasn’t a crack at _anyone_ in particular really, and wasn’t the center of my post. > [@](#): > > I’ll have you know that a. we don’t live in basements in England you daft bitch No kiddin’. Well, basements, garages, whatever. But again, my post neither centered around adults living at home, nor was directed at you nor any inhabitant of lovely England. Seems you’re a bit paranoid. > [@](#): > > and b. my parents _wanted_ me to live at home. Because they _Gasp_ loved me and knew that I wouldn’t be able to survive on my own because of my mental problems. Of course they WUV you! When did I say parents didn’t love their kids? You’re going from a _bit_ paranoid to tinfoil hat paranoid now, darlin’. Sorry for your mental problems, but as my post, once again, was not directed at you nor did it center around adults living at home I think you’re jumping down my throat rather hastily. > [@](#): > > So fuck you, you self righteous human anus. Not all adults who live with their parents are evil spoiled brats. Ouch. I’m wounded. No really, I’m very, very hurt. Okay, so I’m not. Mainly because I neither said any such thing nor am I going to get sucked into your paranoid rantings at any hint of a comment you percieve as a slam against your particular scenerio. Really, you don’t seem to be dealing with your situation very well if you get so personally insulted by any fleeting comment such as the one in my above post. Maybe you should move out or something. > [@](#): > > Some adults who don’t are the fucking real brats, that’s all I have to fucking say. Whatever makes you feel better, dear. > [@](#): > > -Jackie, 31 and still living with her dad, and he needs me to look after him and I suppose I’m not a worthy human being unless I leave him to rot in a home and sit proudly and grandly in my own personal egg box and masturbate over how fucking independent and grown up I am. Fuck that. (and I can’t afford a place of my own any sodding way! Do I still have your permisson to exist without cringing in mortal shame, Miss Independent Arrogant Bitch who is So Much More Worthy Than Me)? Wow. Um, you’ve really got some issues. That’s all I have to say to _that_. > [@](#): > > _ **this has been my final post on the sdmb, thankyou and goodbye, not having a credit card sucks and thank god for ignore lists, ta ta and au revoir and sayonara** _ Well, _ **I** _ for one will miss you terribly. ---
**Author:** ![Clothahump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Clothahump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothahump)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2004, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-the-hell-lets-their-children-call-that-late-at-night/239166/62 "2004-04-10T18:27:15Z")
> [@ivylass](#): > > My Ivykids are almost-12 and almost-15. Call me old-fashioned, but we’ve set a cut-off time of 9pm for them to call friends or receive calls. Evening is family-homework-chore time, and they’ve had all day at school to chat with their friends. Ours was 10:30 when the kids were teens. We would get calls at 1 or 2 in the morning from some of The Stepson From Hell ™’s friends. We started out saying polite things like “Sorry, we don’t take calls this late at night.” Finally, after the third night in a row of a phone call at 2:00 from the same bozo, I answered the phone the next time. When I heard his semi-coherent grunt asking to speak to The Stepson From Hell ™, I responded with some choice profanity and ended with telling him that if he ever called after 10:30 again, I’d jam the phone up his ass. Five minutes later, the phone rings again. Same number on the caller id. I answer with “What part of don’t call after 10:30 did you not understand, you stupid dipshit?” It was his mom. He had the gall to complain to her that I cussed at him and she called to complain about it. That was an interesting conversation. I had to go buy a new phone the next day, because the receiver was melted. However, the dipshit didn’t call after 10:30 any more. ---
**Author:** ![FilmGeek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b19c9b/32.png) [@FilmGeek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FilmGeek)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2004, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-the-hell-lets-their-children-call-that-late-at-night/239166/63 "2004-04-10T20:50:40Z")
> [@Master Wang-Ka](#): > > on the off chance that our classes will spontaneously decide to wander in for instruction at seven A.M. Heh. I never went to a school that started later than 7:20. Lucky. 🙂 As for the ‘rule’… my best friend in high school risked a beating if she was called after 9pm. Even now, back at home and regrouping at 26, she’s still in for it if her mom’s in a bad mood. In my house, if you call before 10 am… you’re not getting through. We listen to the answering machine and will call you back if it’s an emergency. I work 12:30-7:30 and Ardred works 5-11. Call at midnight and you’re more likely to get an awake and happy Geek than in the morning. ---
**Author:** ![The\_world\_s\_most\_deadliest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bc79bd/32.png) [@The\_world\_s\_most\_deadliest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_world_s_most_deadliest)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2004, 10:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-the-hell-lets-their-children-call-that-late-at-night/239166/64 "2004-04-10T22:49:31Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by lezlers: > Glad to know I’m not the only young person w/o kids who thinks this whole “let your kid use their own judgment and basically do whatever the fuck they want” parenting style is a disaster waiting to happen… Relief on my part, as well. Good to know I haven’t lost my head 😉 I was raised under the philosophy that my only “essential rights” as a child was to receive plenty of love and attention, nutritious meals, clothing on my back, and the best education my parents could provide. Boom, that’s it. No TV or phone in my room (until I could pay for my own line at 17), strict curfew (10PM on the weekends, relaxed to 11PM when I was a senior, no going out on a school night unless it was for school), blah blah angsty blah. The money - when there was enough - went to sign language and art classes for me, guitar lessons for my brother. Sure, I had some angsty rants, but I knew my parents gave a shit. And it sure taught me the value of a dollar. PS thanks for the “young” assessment. I feel like I’m 27 going on 45 sometimes. ---
**Author:** ![theR](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/977dab/32.png) [@theR](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/theR)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2004, 11:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-the-hell-lets-their-children-call-that-late-at-night/239166/65 "2004-04-10T23:17:37Z")
[QUOTE=Beelzebubba] It is 11PM. You are automatically in the wrong and the rude person by calling./QUOTE] Automatically in the wrong? You think every household has the same rules? If someone calls my house at 11pm, it is perfectly fine with me because I’m generally not in bed that early, and if I am I will just let it ring (crazy isn’t it? instead of picking up the phone just so I can be outraged, if it is too late to recieve a call I just LET IT RING). If someone calls my daughter at 11pm, I will take a message and tell the person in question not to call after 9:30pm, which is my daughter’s bedtime. Still, it is rude when you receive a call after a certain hour, especially if the caller knows the house rules. However, that doesn’t excuse being rude in return, particularly if the caller has never done it before. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2004, 12:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-the-hell-lets-their-children-call-that-late-at-night/239166/66 "2004-04-11T00:52:58Z")
> [@Infectious Lass](#): > > And yet again Lezlers comes out with the ‘if you live at home after the age of 12 you’re EEEEEEVIL’ shit :rolleyes: > > So fuck you, you self righteous human anus. Not all adults who live with their parents are evil spoiled brats. Gosh, I had no idea **Lezlers** felt that way. I mean, she must have really been struggling to keep that in check all those times we were hanging out, including that time we were watching movies in my parent’s garage. She seemed real friendly and gracious and all, but I guess she was just barely keeping her disgust with me in check the entire time. Sure is a heck of an actress, I gotta give her that! > [@](#): > > If that kids living at home when they’re 30 remark was a crack at me, I’ll have you know that a. we don’t live in basements in England you daft bitch and b. my parents _wanted_ me to live at home. Because they _Gasp_ loved me and knew that I wouldn’t be able to survive on my own because of my mental problems. Mental problems? No shit? I’d never have guessed. > [@](#): > > _ **this has been my final post on the sdmb, thankyou and goodbye, not having a credit card sucks and thank god for ignore lists, ta ta and au revoir and sayonara** _ I’m sure I speak for everyone when I tell you how broken up we are about that. -Miller, 28, lives at home, knows it’s lame, doesn’t care. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Asbestos\_Mango](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/edb3f5/32.png) [@The\_Asbestos\_Mango](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Asbestos_Mango)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2004, 1:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-the-hell-lets-their-children-call-that-late-at-night/239166/67 "2004-04-11T01:42:27Z")
Except under certain circumstances, such as when one or more of the denizes of the household works odd hours, or there is a life-threatening emergency, phone calls after 9:00 pm fall into the category of rude. When I was in my early twenties, I became friendly with some elderly Mormon missionaries (too long a story for this post). They had this habit of calling me after 9:00 at night. I asked them several times to please, don’t call me this late, I get up early in the morning to be at work an hour before normal people’s alarms go off. They continued calling. After a while (and after getting a few judiciously worded prank calls made by friends of mine) they finally quit calling, and I was able to get an actual decent amount of sleep before going off to my mind-crushingly boring job. I never had a phone cerfew when I was a kid, mostly due to the fact that I wasnt the great social animal, and the few friends I did have were not inclined to call late at night. One incident stands out, however. A classmate fixed me up on a date with a friend of hers who went to another school. After spending a fun-filled evening listening to him make disparging comments about my weight (I was not overweight, but I have always been, ah, blessed in my latter end), we said our goodnights and I determined to tear my classmate a new one for setting me up with the jerk. About two weeks later, around eleven thirty at night, the phone rings, my stepfather answered it and called me to the phone. Guess who it was? Yep. “I was wondering if it I could come over?” “Are you crazy?” I all but screamed. “It’s eleven thirty at night, my parents are in bed, you just woke them up. I can’t believe you are even calling me this late?” The 'rents actually got a kick out of it. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2004, 2:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-the-hell-lets-their-children-call-that-late-at-night/239166/68 "2004-04-11T02:49:01Z")
> [@Thea Logica](#): > > About two weeks later, around eleven thirty at night, the phone rings, my stepfather answered it and called me to the phone. Guess who it was? Yep. > “I was wondering if it I could come over?” > > “Are you crazy?” I all but screamed. “It’s eleven thirty at night, my parents are in bed, you just woke them up. I can’t believe you are even calling me this late?” > > The 'rents actually got a kick out of it. Wait, was it the jerk on the phone, or the friend who set you up with him? I’m guessing the jerk, but I’m not sure. ---
**Author:** ![teleute12](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3d9bf3/32.png) [@teleute12](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/teleute12)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2004, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-the-hell-lets-their-children-call-that-late-at-night/239166/69 "2004-04-11T03:08:32Z")
I never really had a lot of friends calling me when I was in high school, but I was raised to understand that it was rude to call after 9:30pm or so, unless you’d been told otherwise by the person you were calling. Now I live at home with my mother (I’m almost-20) and my social hours deviate from hers quite a bit - for example, last night I had a friend call to invite me over at 11:30pm. My mom was in bed asleep, and stayed asleep because the friend called my cell phone instead of the home phone. As for the OP - I wasn’t allowed to even be _awake_ at 2am when I was 12, much less up and calling my friends. Sheesh. ---
**Author:** ![vasyachkin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/c5a1d2/32.png) [@vasyachkin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vasyachkin)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2004, 3:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-the-hell-lets-their-children-call-that-late-at-night/239166/70 "2004-04-11T03:29:51Z")
interesting. i never had any rules. not about phone use, not about going out, not about sex, none at all. is that really uncommon ? all your fucking _rules_ were reserved strictly as punishment for when i misbehaved. cutting classes or missing homework or smoking weed was NOT ever considered misbehaving, rather, its my personal choice. the only punishable offense was cursing at my parents. the result may be quite different from what you think. i was always such a good kid that i want to vomit now that i think about it. being allowed to think for myself freely, and being stupid (due to young age), i came to all the same conclusions that stupid adults come to - like drinking is bad, marijuana is bad etc, that is i succumbed to propaganda of sorts and the so-called common wisdom. i am really ashamed of having been such a dupe ☹ but its not like i could have been the all-knowing freaking genius that i am now from the day i was born right ? ---
**Author:** ![lezlers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/258eb7/32.png) [@lezlers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lezlers)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2004, 3:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-the-hell-lets-their-children-call-that-late-at-night/239166/71 "2004-04-11T03:47:37Z")
Wow. Thanks **vasyachkin** , for demonstrating the kind of kid parents who don’t set rules end up with. ---
**Author:** ![whiterabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/cab0a1/32.png) [@whiterabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/whiterabbit)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2004, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-the-hell-lets-their-children-call-that-late-at-night/239166/72 "2004-04-11T04:15:25Z")
> [@lezlers](#): > > Wow. > > Thanks **vasyachkin** , for demonstrating the kind of kid parents who don’t set rules end up with. Yeah, the kind of kid who doesn’t know how to use a shift key. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![vasyachkin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/c5a1d2/32.png) [@vasyachkin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vasyachkin)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2004, 5:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-the-hell-lets-their-children-call-that-late-at-night/239166/73 "2004-04-11T05:18:14Z")
> [@whiterabbit](#): > > Yeah, the kind of kid who doesn’t know how to use a shift key. :rolleyes: what, you feel capitalizing letters adds to the substance of the post ? clearly then, you have nothing to say. ---
**Author:** ![whiterabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/cab0a1/32.png) [@whiterabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/whiterabbit)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2004, 2:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-the-hell-lets-their-children-call-that-late-at-night/239166/74 "2004-04-11T14:46:53Z")
It sure makes things easier to read. You’re not e. e. cummings, you know. Your deliberately not capitalizing automatically makes me think you value style over substance, which is what I think you actually do, even though you say otherwise. Not that I think they are from that post. You’re oh so cool and rebellious and **different**. Right. _yawn_ ---
**Author:** ![lezlers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/258eb7/32.png) [@lezlers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lezlers)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2004, 4:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-the-hell-lets-their-children-call-that-late-at-night/239166/75 "2004-04-11T16:50:47Z")
Not to mention the kind of kid who’s method of debating consists of telling people they’re stupid and that they should be doing things _his_ way (catering to children, giving them whatever they want and letting them do whatever they choose) because, hey, look how great _he_ turned out. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![The\_Asbestos\_Mango](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/edb3f5/32.png) [@The\_Asbestos\_Mango](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Asbestos_Mango)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2004, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-the-hell-lets-their-children-call-that-late-at-night/239166/76 "2004-04-11T17:27:04Z")
> [@Miller](#): > > Wait, was it the jerk on the phone, or the friend who set you up with him? > > I’m guessing the jerk, but I’m not sure. It was the jerk. I have recently developed an urge to acquire about a dozen vicious German Shepherds, for the sole purpose of feeding **vasayachkin** to them. Does this make me abnormal, or just extremely annoyed? ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2004, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-the-hell-lets-their-children-call-that-late-at-night/239166/77 "2004-04-11T18:33:52Z")
Oddly enough, **vasyachkin** and I seem to have had more or less the same upbringing. I find that remarkable. ---
**Author:** ![lezlers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/258eb7/32.png) [@lezlers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lezlers)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2004, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-the-hell-lets-their-children-call-that-late-at-night/239166/78 "2004-04-11T19:32:56Z")
> [@Miller](#): > > Oddly enough, **vasyachkin** and I seem to have had more or less the same upbringing. I find that remarkable. Which proves my initial point about how some kids can handle that kind of upbringing and others, obviously, can’t. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![chula](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a4c791/32.png) [@chula](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chula)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2004, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-the-hell-lets-their-children-call-that-late-at-night/239166/79 "2004-04-11T20:03:15Z")
I can’t fathom why people are saying such nasty things about **vasayachkin**. S/he just shared his/her experience and point of view. Now everyone is insulting him/her and even saying they’s like to kill him/her? ---
**Author:** ![LolaBaby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d2c977/32.png) [@LolaBaby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LolaBaby)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2004, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-the-hell-lets-their-children-call-that-late-at-night/239166/80 "2004-04-11T20:15:43Z")
> [@chula](#): > > I can’t fathom why people are saying such nasty things about **vasayachkin**. S/he just shared his/her experience and point of view. Now everyone is insulting him/her and even saying they’s like to kill him/her? Well, I surely don’t think anything s/he said warrants being killed, but posting > [@vasyachkin](#): > > ivy you’re not old fashioned - you’re STUPID. doesn’t exactly win people over to their view, now does it? Least it doesn’t, for me. Nothing what was posted in the OP really deserved that rudeness, IMHO. I’m with **lezlers** …if that’s what “do whatever the hell you like” parenting produces, then I say they, as parents, have failed. OTOH, we see the opposite, **Miller** , whose posts descend into rudeness only after the poster in question (not **ivylass** here) displays utter stupidity. And, at least **Miller** is funny. 😃 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-the-hell-lets-their-children-call-that-late-at-night/239166.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-the-hell-lets-their-children-call-that-late-at-night/239166.md?page=5)