# Who vs. YOU! **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [August 11, 2002, 7:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-vs-you/123379 "2002-08-11T07:23:49Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Enola\_Straight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dec6dc/32.png) [@Enola\_Straight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enola_Straight)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2002, 7:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-vs-you/123379/1 "2002-08-11T07:23:49Z")
In some earlier “versus” threads I and others asked who could beat who in various challenges. Enterprise vs Imperial Star Destroyer Jason Voorhees vs Michael Myers K.I.T.T. vs Batmobile Lorena Bobbit vs O.J.Simpson etc. Who or what could You fight and win? I figure, I could take on Norman Bates. ---
**Author:** ![clevername](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ecccb3/32.png) [@clevername](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/clevername)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2002, 7:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-vs-you/123379/2 "2002-08-11T07:31:15Z")
Well, I know for a fact I can take on my boyfriend and win… although on further reflection, it’s possible he just doesn’t put up much of a fight when being tackled by a teenage girl. Let’s see… I always thought the pink power ranger was kind of a wimp. I’d put hard money on my ability take her down. ---
**Author:** ![Violet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/ebca7d/32.png) [@Violet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Violet)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2002, 7:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-vs-you/123379/3 "2002-08-11T07:43:43Z")
I would _not_ take on those Power Puff Girls! No way! They are too 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![TVGuy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/82dd89/32.png) [@TVGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TVGuy)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2002, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-vs-you/123379/4 "2002-08-11T18:19:29Z")
I’m not much of a fighter, so it would have to be someone meek, also not willing to put up a fight and whom I could beat simply with stern looks and slashing commentary. I’m thinkin’ Dr. Niles Crane from _Frasier_ ---
**Author:** ![Forbin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5e9695/32.png) [@Forbin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Forbin)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2002, 7:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-vs-you/123379/5 "2002-08-11T19:10:45Z")
Me vs. Norm Abrahms. Benchtime; 18th century reproduction furniture. I’d win. I’m so modest. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2002, 11:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-vs-you/123379/6 "2002-08-11T23:19:49Z")
Damn, you guys took all the easy ones. (But good call on the Powerpuff Girls, **Violet** , they are hardcore.) I just finished watching _Edward Scissorhands_, and I think I could intimidate him with words and intimidating gestures. And I could maybe take on Verdell from _As Good as it Gets_ if there was a garbage chute in the vicinity. ---
**Author:** ![LifeOnWry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/96bed5/32.png) [@LifeOnWry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LifeOnWry)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2002, 11:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-vs-you/123379/7 "2002-08-11T23:37:51Z")
I could verbally slash Kevin Smith’s Silent Bob to ribbons. ---
**Author:** ![Roadwalker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e19b73/32.png) [@Roadwalker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roadwalker)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2002, 11:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-vs-you/123379/8 "2002-08-11T23:40:35Z")
I could beat Darth Vader. I would give him a hard time about how he cried over his mom and cried to his girlfriend. I’d call him Annie. I’d piss him off so bad then when he was so mad he couldn’t see straight I would press all of those buttons on his chest and screw up his breathing systems. ---
**Author:** ![Profane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e47774/32.png) [@Profane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Profane)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2002, 11:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-vs-you/123379/9 "2002-08-11T23:41:41Z")
I’m pretty sure I could kick Angelina Jolie’s butt. ---
**Author:** ![roadrunner70](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e19b73/32.png) [@roadrunner70](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/roadrunner70)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2002, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-vs-you/123379/10 "2002-08-11T23:46:37Z")
Me vs. Mini-Me…oh yeah, you’re MINE Troyer… ---
**Author:** ![japatlgt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df705f/32.png) [@japatlgt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/japatlgt)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2002, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-vs-you/123379/11 "2002-08-12T00:00:38Z")
Me vs. Mike Tyson. I got money that says I can outrun 'im. ---
**Author:** ![DougAB](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e47c2d/32.png) [@DougAB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DougAB)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2002, 1:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-vs-you/123379/12 "2002-08-12T13:26:48Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by superbee \* > \*\*Me vs. Mini-Me…oh yeah, you’re MINE Troyer… \*\* I suspect you may have a hard time getting in a even fight with every MTV reporter and their mother’s tripping over themselves to say, “Troy, Troy! Troy!..Um, why are you so great?” ---
**Author:** ![Tansu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/67e7ee/32.png) [@Tansu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tansu)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2002, 1:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-vs-you/123379/13 "2002-08-12T13:58:46Z")
I could take Christina Aguilera. I’d need to do more training before fighting Britney. ---
**Author:** ![kniz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/c37758/32.png) [@kniz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kniz)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2002, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-vs-you/123379/14 "2002-08-12T16:47:06Z")
Kermit the Frog and Miss Piggy at the same time. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![interface2x](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/c0e974/32.png) [@interface2x](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/interface2x)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2002, 5:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-vs-you/123379/15 "2002-08-12T17:17:01Z")
Johnny Lipnicki. I think I could take him. ---
**Author:** ![Beadalin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3be4f8/32.png) [@Beadalin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beadalin)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2002, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-vs-you/123379/16 "2002-08-12T17:28:33Z")
Me vs. a bee ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2002, 7:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-vs-you/123379/17 "2002-08-12T19:14:31Z")
I’ll bring an old-fashioned beat-down to Howard Stern (and his guest, if they want a piece too!) ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2002, 2:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-vs-you/123379/18 "2002-08-13T02:07:05Z")
I’m pretty sure I could beat the crap out of Frankie Muniz. I _think_ I could also take out Dr. Ruth. ---
**Author:** ![Horseflesh](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/horseflesh/32/7502_2.png) [@Horseflesh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horseflesh)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2002, 3:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-vs-you/123379/19 "2002-08-13T03:03:10Z")
In a one-on-one fight I think I could take out Dr. Evil, “Victorious” Jay from the Kevin Smith films, and Eminem. Not all at once though. Oh, and Winona Ryder and Mary Stuart Masterson have an always open invitation to take me on. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![dead0man](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/edb3f5/32.png) [@dead0man](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dead0man)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2002, 8:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-vs-you/123379/20 "2002-08-13T08:22:28Z")
I could pummel Lennie for awhile, as long as George doesn’t say “let 'em have it Lennie”. I could also beat up Bill Dauterive and Dale Gribble at the same time. dead0man