# Who Would Play You in the Movie Based on Your Life? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [October 4, 2000, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-play-you-in-the-movie-based-on-your-life/35640 "2000-10-04T16:57:43Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Gregor\_Samsa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a6a055/32.png) [@Gregor\_Samsa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gregor_Samsa)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-play-you-in-the-movie-based-on-your-life/35640/1 "2000-10-04T16:57:43Z")
They’ve finally decided to make a feature film based on your life. This is such a plum role (obviously) that any actor will drop whatever they’re doing to take this part. You have the final say as to who plays you. Also, you have managed to exploit a rift in the space-time continuum that allows you to use any actor, living or dead, from any point in their lives. Playing me will be either John Cusack or Ben Stillar. I like Cusack for the misunderstood, possibly mentally-ill aspects of my personality. Stillar represents the nice guy side of me (Stillar’s portrayal of Mr Furious in _Mystery Men_ was pretty bang-on for describing me.) They’re also roughly my age (a little younger, maybe, but not by much) and look something like me (idealized, it’s true.) Using whatever criteria you like, who plays **you** in your movie? ---
**Author:** ![Jack\_Batty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jack_batty/32/3201_2.png) [@Jack\_Batty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jack_Batty)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-play-you-in-the-movie-based-on-your-life/35640/2 "2000-10-04T17:15:44Z")
My answer may, or may not, make you say … huh? Fer god’s sake why not someone a little more suave, but … **Philip Seymour Hoffman**. He’d have to slim down a little, but not much. He’s the one actor who’s portrayals of insecurities, cockiness, fear, bravado, idiosyncarcies etc, have completely sold me. Any actor trying to pull of _me_ would need to dip from this well often. And, he is about my age as well. I wouldn’t say he looks alot like me, but there are a few similarities, enough to pull off the role, anyway. ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-play-you-in-the-movie-based-on-your-life/35640/3 "2000-10-04T18:09:29Z")
We’ve done this a lot, but we have so many new members here that, hey—let’s do it again! My answer never changes, though: Eve Arden, c1945. How about a sub-topic? Who do you see playing OTHER Dopers? Ukulele Ike: Skeets Gallagher SaxFace: Patsy Kelly Techchick: that “Bailey” girl from “WKRP” Wildest Bill: Michael J. Fox PLDennison: Monty Woolley Manhattan: Charlie Sheen AndyGirl: Drew Barrymore OK, I’m tired, anyone else wanna jump in? ---
**Author:** ![Dinsdale](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/97f17d/32.png) [@Dinsdale](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dinsdale)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-play-you-in-the-movie-based-on-your-life/35640/4 "2000-10-04T18:29:10Z")
I think Kevin Spacey already did me. dropzone - Ned Beatty sailor - Harry Dean Stanton Homer - John Goodman spooje - Clu Gallagher ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-play-you-in-the-movie-based-on-your-life/35640/5 "2000-10-04T18:29:27Z")
OK, I’ve got some more . . . Where are the rest of you, anyway? FairyChatMom: Billie Burke Satan and Drain Bead: Richard Burton and Elizabeth Taylor (in “Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolfe?”) Coldfire: Rupert Everett Pugluvr: Megan Mulally from “Will and Grace” Esprix: Danny Masterson from “That 70s Show” Silent Bob: Buster Keaton ---
**Author:** ![Dinsdale](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/97f17d/32.png) [@Dinsdale](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dinsdale)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-play-you-in-the-movie-based-on-your-life/35640/6 "2000-10-04T18:30:43Z")
Apparently I’m right here with you, my dear. ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-play-you-in-the-movie-based-on-your-life/35640/7 "2000-10-04T18:36:15Z")
“I think Kevin Spacey already did me.” I know—I read “The National Enquirer!” ---
**Author:** ![Stuffy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f17d59/32.png) [@Stuffy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stuffy)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-play-you-in-the-movie-based-on-your-life/35640/8 "2000-10-04T18:36:29Z")
Not that he’s a great actor, but for the person who most acts like me (not to mention the same color) I’ll have to go with DL Hugley (sp?) ---
**Author:** ![monster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@monster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monster)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-play-you-in-the-movie-based-on-your-life/35640/9 "2000-10-04T18:50:25Z")
The girl who played Dee on What’s Happening. Either her or Sandra Bullock. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Ivar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/51bf81/32.png) [@Ivar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ivar)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-play-you-in-the-movie-based-on-your-life/35640/10 "2000-10-04T18:56:51Z")
Jason Lee, one of the smart-asses from Kevin Smiths’s movies Mallrats and Chasing Amy ( and small role in Dogma) I would want Kevin Smith to write the story as well. ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-play-you-in-the-movie-based-on-your-life/35640/11 "2000-10-04T19:21:28Z")
Photo of Skeets Gallagher, by the way: [http://silent-movies.com/Gents/Annex/GallagherRichard.jpg](http://silent-movies.com/Gents/Annex/GallagherRichard.jpg) Those of you who know Ike: am I nutz, or doesn’t Skeets actually look a bit like him? ---
**Author:** ![jesuslynch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e99b99/32.png) [@jesuslynch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jesuslynch)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-play-you-in-the-movie-based-on-your-life/35640/12 "2000-10-04T19:32:45Z")
Leisure Suit Larry. Either him or Krusty. ::tap, tap:: Is this thing on? ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-play-you-in-the-movie-based-on-your-life/35640/13 "2000-10-04T19:41:04Z")
Oh, and here’s an Eve Arden Web site: [http://www.reelclassics.com/Actresses/Arden/arden.htm](http://www.reelclassics.com/Actresses/Arden/arden.htm) . . . Ya see what I mean? ---
**Author:** ![Dinsdale](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/97f17d/32.png) [@Dinsdale](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dinsdale)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-play-you-in-the-movie-based-on-your-life/35640/14 "2000-10-04T20:23:23Z")
William Hurt would portray me in a congenial, slightly befuddled manner, with a hint of some lurking unidentified darkness. ---
**Author:** ![wring](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/838e76/32.png) [@wring](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wring)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-play-you-in-the-movie-based-on-your-life/35640/15 "2000-10-04T20:32:45Z")
Michelle Pffifer would play me (as a matter of fact, whenever folks have suggested I write a book about my experiences at the correction center, I’ve always made this exact point) 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Ukulele\_Ike](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/df788c/32.png) [@Ukulele\_Ike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ukulele_Ike)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-play-you-in-the-movie-based-on-your-life/35640/16 "2000-10-04T20:36:40Z")
Ohmighod…it’s like lookin’ in a MIRROR! And here I was all ready to pick Franklin Pangborn. ---
**Author:** ![Poysyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f4b2a3/32.png) [@Poysyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Poysyn)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 8:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-play-you-in-the-movie-based-on-your-life/35640/17 "2000-10-04T20:54:22Z")
I have nothing to add, I don’t know. ---
**Author:** ![glee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b5a626/32.png) [@glee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/glee)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-play-you-in-the-movie-based-on-your-life/35640/18 "2000-10-04T21:22:28Z")
Salma Hayek. Yes, I know I’m a bloke. I’m just looking forward to the script conferences… ---
**Author:** ![Freyr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/freyr/32/5763_2.png) [@Freyr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freyr)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 9:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-play-you-in-the-movie-based-on-your-life/35640/19 "2000-10-04T21:28:28Z")
\*\*Eve wrote: How about a sub-topic? Who do you see playing OTHER Dopers? Wildest Bill: Michael J. Fox\*\* Naw, for **Wildest Bill** you’d use Gilbert Gottfried. The voice, the personality, it all fits! ---
**Author:** ![Scribe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Scribe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scribe)\ **Post date:** [October 4, 2000, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-play-you-in-the-movie-based-on-your-life/35640/20 "2000-10-04T23:02:42Z")
Zero Mostel (I once walked into work to have my boss ask this very question. Off the top of my head, that’s what I said.) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-play-you-in-the-movie-based-on-your-life/35640.md?page=2)