# Who would win a war between the Oompa-Loompas and the Munchkins? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [January 5, 2007, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-a-war-between-the-oompa-loompas-and-the-munchkins/386829 "2007-01-05T16:52:20Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Smooth\_Jack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8c91f0/32.png) [@Smooth\_Jack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smooth_Jack)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2007, 6:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-a-war-between-the-oompa-loompas-and-the-munchkins/386829/21 "2007-01-05T18:26:49Z")
As I recall, the Munchkins already had soldiers. They marched around with Dorothy. With an established military to their credit, I vote Munchkins. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2007, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-a-war-between-the-oompa-loompas-and-the-munchkins/386829/22 "2007-01-05T18:27:55Z")
It always bugged when Dorothy started her yellow-brick road walk in the center of a spiral in the middle of Munchkinland. Glinda said the Munchkins would escort Dorothy to the border of Munchkinland but after a bit of strolling and a lot of singing, they all wave goodbye and in the upper right corner of the screen you can still see the starting point, meaning her “escort” was for about fifty feet, tops. They didn’t escort her from Munchkinland; at best they showed her to the door of Munchkinland, like a butler or something. Then again, to Munchkins, that might’ve seemed like a long haul. Anyway, the Oompas could roam around the entire factory, so distance meant less to them. They could easily engage in close combat and scurry 100 feet away to regroup and rearm, knowing the Munchkins are too lazy to chase them. ---
**Author:** ![JThunder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e95f7d/32.png) [@JThunder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JThunder)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2007, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-a-war-between-the-oompa-loompas-and-the-munchkins/386829/23 "2007-01-05T18:31:39Z")
[It’s been discussed before.](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=213441) ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2007, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-a-war-between-the-oompa-loompas-and-the-munchkins/386829/24 "2007-01-05T18:32:16Z")
I say we give both sides knives, & let them fight it out. We can finish off the survivors at our leisure. > [@](#): > > Professor Farnsworth: **Who are those horrible orange creatures over there?** > Glermo: _Why those are the Grunka-Lunkas. They work here, in the Slurm factory._ > Professor Farnsworth: **Tell them I hate them!** ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2007, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-a-war-between-the-oompa-loompas-and-the-munchkins/386829/25 "2007-01-05T18:54:32Z")
[QUOTE=Otto] The **Lollipop Guild** was represented by the three male Munchkins who sang out of the corners of their mouths like tough guys. The **Lullaby League** was represented by the three female Munchkins done up like ballerinas. [/QUOTE] Ohhhhhhhhh now I remember. Right. ---
**Author:** ![outlierrn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/outlierrn/32/3005_2.png) [@outlierrn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/outlierrn)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2007, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-a-war-between-the-oompa-loompas-and-the-munchkins/386829/26 "2007-01-05T19:09:09Z")
[QUOTE=Anaamika] Oompa-Loompas. The Munchkins were afraid of freakin’ Dorothy. Not a chance in hell. [/QUOTE] Piffle, they were quite reasonably of the opinion that dorothy was a foreign witch, who’d just taken out the local wicked witch with one clean airborn attack. disscretion was clearly in order. Once they got the straight dope, they were, like, totally hitting on her ---
**Author:** ![Epimetheus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c4cdca/32.png) [@Epimetheus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Epimetheus)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2007, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-a-war-between-the-oompa-loompas-and-the-munchkins/386829/27 "2007-01-05T19:12:43Z")
It’d be a short battle. ---
**Author:** ![sciurophobic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cab0a1/32.png) [@sciurophobic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sciurophobic)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2007, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-a-war-between-the-oompa-loompas-and-the-munchkins/386829/28 "2007-01-05T19:16:11Z")
This question is pointless, as the Nac Mac Feegle would beat the crap out of both of them. ---
**Author:** ![Push\_You\_Down](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/push_you_down/32/9095_2.png) [@Push\_You\_Down](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Push_You_Down)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2007, 7:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-a-war-between-the-oompa-loompas-and-the-munchkins/386829/29 "2007-01-05T19:18:00Z")
A small matter or little import. ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2007, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-a-war-between-the-oompa-loompas-and-the-munchkins/386829/30 "2007-01-05T19:20:31Z")
[QUOTE=pool] Oompa Loompas are without fear, compassion, mercy or regret. [/QUOTE] They’re also indistinguishable from one another and totally interchangeable, which strongly suggests they will not stop to grieve the loss of a comrade. They will swamp the munchkin entrenchments in a savage orange wave. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2007, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-a-war-between-the-oompa-loompas-and-the-munchkins/386829/31 "2007-01-05T19:20:46Z")
The American people would win by virtue of being able to watch this. [QUOTE=Smooth Jack] As I recall, the Munchkins already had soldiers. They marched around with Dorothy. With an established military to their credit, I vote Munchkins. [/QUOTE] Pfft. Switzerland has an established military, and they’re even less intimidating than the Munchkins. ---
**Author:** ![Madd\_Maxx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Madd\_Maxx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Madd_Maxx)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2007, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-a-war-between-the-oompa-loompas-and-the-munchkins/386829/32 "2007-01-05T19:22:26Z")
I’ll take Wee-man leading a small band of midget wrestlers to beat them both. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2007, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-a-war-between-the-oompa-loompas-and-the-munchkins/386829/33 "2007-01-05T19:26:40Z")
[QUOTE=Gangster Octopus] My money’s on the Ewoks. And a tri-lateral Ewok/Munchkin/Oompa-Loompa war would produce a lot of “Oh my God, the horror of war…the extremely cute horror of war.” [/QUOTE] Cute, that is, until they run up against the [Nac Mac Feegle!](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nac_Mac_Feegle) Then the blood – Ewok blood, Munchkin blood, Oompa-Loompa blood, even that disgusting **Smurf** blood they use to make Blue Curacao (you didn’t **really** believe it was made out of oranges, did you?) – the blood will flow like mighty river of rum-spiked chocolate! ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2007, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-a-war-between-the-oompa-loompas-and-the-munchkins/386829/34 "2007-01-05T19:28:08Z")
[QUOTE=JThunder] [It’s been discussed before.](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=213441) [/QUOTE] Of course it has. This is the SDMB. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2007, 7:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-a-war-between-the-oompa-loompas-and-the-munchkins/386829/35 "2007-01-05T19:33:57Z")
I say it would be a draw, if both sides were leaderless. And without long-reach weapons, their arms would be to short to inflict much damage. However, if they were led by the Wicked Witch of the West and Willy Wonka (what’s up with all the W’s?), then I’d have to go with the Munchkins. Wonka has a cruel streak, but he seems to have a real affection for short people. The Witch, on the other hand, is batshit insane with hatred. Here’s the real question: The Cowardly Lion vs Grandpa Joe – who wins? ---
**Author:** ![mobo85](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b19c9b/32.png) [@mobo85](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mobo85)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2007, 7:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-a-war-between-the-oompa-loompas-and-the-munchkins/386829/36 "2007-01-05T19:49:03Z")
[QUOTE=tdn] Here’s the real question: The Cowardly Lion vs Grandpa Joe – who wins? [/QUOTE] Grandpa Joe, of course. He’s as rebellious as Charlie is, not giving a crap what happens if he steals some of Wonka’s flying drink. The Cowardly Lion is, of course, cowardly. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2007, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-a-war-between-the-oompa-loompas-and-the-munchkins/386829/37 "2007-01-05T19:58:47Z")
[QUOTE=Cervaise] They’re also indistinguishable from one another and totally interchangeable, which strongly suggests they will not stop to grieve the loss of a comrade. They will swamp the munchkin entrenchments in a savage orange wave. [/QUOTE] They call it “The Orange Crush”. ---
**Author:** ![Meeko](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e495f1/32.png) [@Meeko](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Meeko)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2007, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-a-war-between-the-oompa-loompas-and-the-munchkins/386829/38 "2007-01-05T20:18:31Z")
\ ---
**Author:** ![vibrotronica](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/a9a28c/32.png) [@vibrotronica](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vibrotronica)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2007, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-a-war-between-the-oompa-loompas-and-the-munchkins/386829/39 "2007-01-05T20:31:00Z")
The population argument is the most compelling. Oompa Loompas, while more physcially powerful, mentally tough, and armed with better technology, are the last survivors of a doomed race. The Munchkins, however, are belligerent and numerous. In any sustained conflict, Munchkin production would eventually overcome Oompa Loompa weapondry and resolve. I forsee the besiged Loompa survivors squatting in the ruins of the chocolate factory surrounded by a sea of Munchkin soldiers. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [January 5, 2007, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-a-war-between-the-oompa-loompas-and-the-munchkins/386829/40 "2007-01-05T20:51:50Z")
[QUOTE=vibrotronica] I forsee the besiged Loompa survivors squatting in the ruins of the chocolate factory surrounded by a sea of Munchkin soldiers. [/QUOTE] Wow, just like Hanoi. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-a-war-between-the-oompa-loompas-and-the-munchkins/386829.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-a-war-between-the-oompa-loompas-and-the-munchkins/386829.md?page=3)