# Who Would Win In a Fight Between ... **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [December 31, 2015, 1:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815 "2015-12-31T13:55:51Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Eutychus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a3d4f5/32.png) [@Eutychus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eutychus)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2015, 1:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/1 "2015-12-31T13:55:51Z")
Rules: One person suggests a potential match up. The next decides who would win, gives a rationale for their decsion, then posts the next match up. First up: Who would win in a fight between Aunt Jemima and Mrs. Butterworth? ---
**Author:** ![rainy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c2a13f/32.png) [@rainy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rainy)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2015, 2:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/2 "2015-12-31T14:33:31Z")
Aunt Jemima since she is a human being. Mrs. Butterworth is a bottle of syrup that is maybe twelve inches tall. Jemima has height, weight, and reach all in her favor. Now Uncle Ben’s (the rice guy) vs. Chef Boyardee. ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2015, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/3 "2015-12-31T14:49:58Z")
Uncle Ben would win. Boyardee is fat and out of shape. Unless it’s a knife fight. Don’t take on a chef in a knife fight. Garfield vs. Heathcliff ---
**Author:** ![The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_other_waldo_pepper/32/12370_2.png) [@The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Other_Waldo_Pepper)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2015, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/4 "2015-12-31T14:52:16Z")
> [@TriPolar](#): > > Uncle Ben would win. Boyardee is fat and out of shape. Unless it’s a knife fight. Don’t take on a chef in a knife fight. > > Garfield vs. Heathcliff By your own reasoning, Heathcliff. Bruce Wayne vs James Bond ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2015, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/5 "2015-12-31T14:53:43Z")
> [@Eutychus](#): > > Who would win in a fight between Aunt Jemima and Mrs. Butterworth? Aunt Jemima, hands down. She looks like the type who’d whup Tom’s\* ass with a broom for daring to enter the kitchen! \*Of T&J fame. Uncle Ben vs Chef Boy-ar-dee? Chef, no question: “What, you gonna bring a knife to a gunfight? Hokay!” Next: Captain Peter Peachfuzz vs Mr Big.\*\* \*\*Of R&B fame. ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2015, 2:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/6 "2015-12-31T14:56:10Z")
> [@The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](#): > > Bruce Wayne vs James Bond James Bond. Neither Bruce Wayne nor Batman is a cold-blooded assassin. ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2015, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/7 "2015-12-31T14:58:29Z")
> [@TriPolar](#): > > Garfield vs. Heathcliff Heathcliff. Garfield is just a fat and lazy meatloaf, kind of like my own cat. ---
**Author:** ![Enola\_Straight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dec6dc/32.png) [@Enola\_Straight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enola_Straight)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2015, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/8 "2015-12-31T17:48:40Z")
Khan Noonien Singh vs Paul Atreides Blade Runner Replicants vs Battlestar Galactica Cylons The Marx Brothers vs The Three Stooges Klingons vs Sontarans Cthulhu vs Godzilla ---
**Author:** ![Dante\_G](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/977dab/32.png) [@Dante\_G](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dante_G)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2015, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/9 "2015-12-31T18:06:42Z")
I like these kind of VS threads, but are we actually going to treat these semi seriously, or just throw out random silly ideas and then move on? ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2015, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/10 "2015-12-31T18:20:59Z")
> [@Enola\_Straight](#): > > The Marx Brothers vs The Three Stooges The Marx Brothers because the Three Stooges would be too busy smacking each other. Nude match between The Donald v. Melania ---
**Author:** ![YogSothoth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/8edcca/32.png) [@YogSothoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YogSothoth)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2015, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/11 "2015-12-31T18:54:32Z")
> [@Muffin](#): > > The Marx Brothers because the Three Stooges would be too busy smacking each other. > Nude match between The Donald v. Melania Donald might be older, but he’s taller and has the weight advantage. His wife is a model, so while healthy, probably isn’t putting on muscles to defend herself. Donald wins but it would be close. Goku vs. Superman :D:D:D ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2015, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/12 "2015-12-31T19:16:35Z")
> [@YogSosoth](#): > > Goku vs. Superman :D:D:D Eventually Goku. As he’s about to lose to Superman he evolves to Super Duper Ooper Saiyan 14 to be just a tad stronger than Superman and then they continue the fight in the next episode. ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2015, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/13 "2015-12-31T19:20:18Z")
Wesley Crusher vs. Sheldon Cooper ---
**Author:** ![G0sp3l](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c68b51/32.png) [@G0sp3l](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/G0sp3l)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2015, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/14 "2015-12-31T20:41:10Z")
> [@Drunky\_Smurf](#): > > Wesley Crusher vs. Sheldon Cooper Wesley crushes Sheldon. Wesley serves on a war-ship he has to at least KNOW how to make a fist. Sheldon goes fetal at a sneeze. Flash Gordon vs. Buck Rogers. ---
**Author:** ![TroutMan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/troutman/32/6721_2.png) [@TroutMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TroutMan)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2015, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/15 "2015-12-31T21:11:07Z")
Buck Rogers can fly, Flash can’t. And Buck has the edge on weaponry. So no contest there. Next up: lion vs tiger. Please provide at least 50 cites to support your answer. ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2015, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/16 "2015-12-31T21:32:41Z")
Tiger [50+ cites for tiger](https://www.google.ca/search?q=sexy+tiger+costume&safe=off&espv=2&biw=1242&bih=619&site=webhp&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwi_3ouChofKAhWKFh4KHX9VARYQ_AUIBigB) and [50+ cites against lion](https://www.google.ca/search?q=cowardly+lion&safe=off&espv=2&biw=1242&bih=619&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwiEgdOhhofKAhWKKh4KHfS7A4sQ_AUIBigB). Thatcher v. Reagan, but neither with weapons. ---
**Author:** ![Lemur866](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lemur866/32/434_2.png) [@Lemur866](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lemur866)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2015, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/17 "2015-12-31T21:38:30Z")
Thatcher wins. Reagan can’t hit a woman, and Thatcher goes right for the goolies. ---
**Author:** ![Lemur866](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lemur866/32/434_2.png) [@Lemur866](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lemur866)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2015, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/18 "2015-12-31T21:40:21Z")
R2D2 vs Chewbacca. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Q](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/898d66/32.png) [@Johnny\_Q](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Q)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2015, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/19 "2015-12-31T23:05:26Z")
Chewbacca. But only because R2 Lets the Wookie Win. Malcolm Reynolds vs Han Solo ---
**Author:** ![TroutMan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/troutman/32/6721_2.png) [@TroutMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TroutMan)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2015, 11:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/20 "2015-12-31T23:08:56Z")
Han Solo, because he shoots first, dammit. Alf vs Mork. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815.md?page=2)