# Who Would Win In a Fight Between ... **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [December 31, 2015, 1:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815 "2015-12-31T13:55:51Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![rainy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c2a13f/32.png) [@rainy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rainy)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2015, 11:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/21 "2015-12-31T23:11:26Z")
It just got real. ETA Solo/Reynolds not ALF/Mork ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2015, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/22 "2015-12-31T23:16:14Z")
> [@TroutMan](#): > > Alf vs Mork. Mork wins. He takes an allergy pill and shrinks to teeny-tiny size (because allergy pills shrink membranes, and Orkans are all membrane). He then hides on a cat which gets eaten by ALF whereupon the allergy meds wear off and Mork resumes his natural size. ALF explodes. Batman v. Spiderman ---
**Author:** ![Ranger\_Jeff](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranger_jeff/32/2065_2.png) [@Ranger\_Jeff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranger_Jeff)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2015, 11:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/23 "2015-12-31T23:19:34Z")
Mork. He could use his finger to freeze ALF, and ALF is no Fonzie. Eastwood’s “Man With No Name” vs Harry Callahan. ---
**Author:** ![G0sp3l](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c68b51/32.png) [@G0sp3l](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/G0sp3l)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2016, 3:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/24 "2016-01-01T03:27:40Z")
> [@Ranger\_Jeff](#): > > Mork. He could use his finger to freeze ALF, and ALF is no Fonzie. > > Eastwood’s “Man With No Name” vs Harry Callahan. High Plains Drifter MWNN was a cold SOB, Callahan still had to work within the law, sort of. I’ll pick the gunslinger. Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter vs Abraham Van Helsing, Vampire Hunter. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2016, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/25 "2016-01-01T16:13:29Z")
Lincoln. Even aside from being a vampire hunter, he’s also the President, with an entire army to back him up. Next up: Alfred (of Batman) vs. Jarvis (of Iron Man) ---
**Author:** ![The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_other_waldo_pepper/32/12370_2.png) [@The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Other_Waldo_Pepper)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2016, 4:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/26 "2016-01-01T16:50:57Z")
> [@Chronos](#): > > Next up: Alfred (of Batman) vs. Jarvis (of Iron Man) Alfred is often depicted as some kind of former-British-military badass, and even in the Adam West series could dispatch the occasional villain single-handed; maybe it’s an even match if they’re both comic relief with blunderbusses, but Alfred otherwise. The MISSION:IMPOSSIBLE team tries to con The Prisoner into revealing his secret. ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2016, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/27 "2016-01-01T19:24:49Z")
I think the IMF would succeed because no matter how silly “The Prisoner” became, it was no match for the ludicrous espionage tactics of Phelps and company, God love 'em! Next: The Stay Puft Marshmallow Man vs. The Michelin Man. ---
**Author:** ![Smapti](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smapti/32/17938_2.png) [@Smapti](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smapti)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2016, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/28 "2016-01-01T19:35:54Z")
The Michelin Man, because only Michelin tires maintain peak performance at high temperature, whereas marshmallows melt. Sting (the musician) vs. Sting (the professional wrestler). ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2016, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/29 "2016-01-01T19:37:30Z")
> [@terentii](#): > > James Bond. Neither Bruce Wayne nor Batman is a cold-blooded assassin. On the other hand, neither Bruce Wayne nor Batman was vaporized by Woody Allen’s indigestion. So, even in his presumably enfeebled dotage, at age 87, I have to give the round to [Bruce Wayne/Batman.](http://www.lifetimetv.co.uk/sites/default/files/assets/landscape/Adam%20West.jpg?itok=7Rb9WwCG) ---
**Author:** ![Ranger\_Jeff](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranger_jeff/32/2065_2.png) [@Ranger\_Jeff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranger_Jeff)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2016, 9:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/30 "2016-01-01T21:27:33Z")
Maynard G Krebs vs Gilligan? ---
**Author:** ![Horatio\_Hellpop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e5b9ba/32.png) [@Horatio\_Hellpop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horatio_Hellpop)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2016, 10:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/31 "2016-01-01T22:55:43Z")
> [@Ranger\_Jeff](#): > > Maynard G Krebs vs Gilligan? Gilligan, a WWII veteran (Navy). Colonel Sanders or General Tso? ---
**Author:** ![Defensive\_Indifference](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/defensive_indifference/32/6502_2.png) [@Defensive\_Indifference](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Defensive_Indifference)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2016, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/32 "2016-01-02T01:34:00Z")
So it looks like General Tso was a real life military badass who saw a lot of action. Col. Sanders served in the US Army for a couple years as a teamster. His “Colonel” designation was an honorary title given by the State of Kentucky. Wiki says Sanders was involved in a gunfight with a business rival, but it doesn’t give a lot of detail. So, General Tso dispatches Sanders without breaking a sweat. Jim Rockford vs. Thomas Magnum. ---
**Author:** ![G0sp3l](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c68b51/32.png) [@G0sp3l](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/G0sp3l)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2016, 3:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/33 "2016-01-02T03:35:04Z")
> [@Bayard](#): > > So it looks like General Tso was a real life military badass who saw a lot of action. Col. Sanders served in the US Army for a couple years as a teamster. His “Colonel” designation was an honorary title given by the State of Kentucky. Wiki says Sanders was involved in a gunfight with a business rival, but it doesn’t give a lot of detail. So, General Tso dispatches Sanders without breaking a sweat. > > Jim Rockford vs. Thomas Magnum. Rockford could take an ass-whupping like no other, which is lucky cause Navy Special Ops, Viet Nam vet Magnum can dish’em out. Magnum. Inspector Gadget vs. Dyno-mutt. ---
**Author:** ![Nema98](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/d2c977/32.png) [@Nema98](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nema98)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2016, 3:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/34 "2016-01-02T03:35:41Z")
> [@Bayard](#): > > So it looks like General Tso was a real life military badass who saw a lot of action. Col. Sanders served in the US Army for a couple years as a teamster. His “Colonel” designation was an honorary title given by the State of Kentucky. Wiki says Sanders was involved in a gunfight with a business rival, but it doesn’t give a lot of detail. So, General Tso dispatches Sanders without breaking a sweat. > > Jim Rockford vs. Thomas Magnum. While I hate to say it, I would say Thomas Magnum based on the fact that he was a Navy Seals. Other than that it’s really hard to say. I prefer Rockford though. ---
**Author:** ![Nema98](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/d2c977/32.png) [@Nema98](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nema98)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2016, 3:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/35 "2016-01-02T03:38:36Z")
> [@G0sp3l](#): > > Rockford could take an ass-whupping like no other, which is lucky cause Navy Special Ops, Viet Nam vet Magnum can dish’em out. > > Magnum. > > Inspector Gadget vs. Dyno-mutt. Dyno-mutt, Gadget was too dimwitted for anything. Dyno-mutt could bite and maul. Captain Hook or Gaston? ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2016, 4:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/36 "2016-01-02T04:51:17Z")
Gaston likes to hunt animals. Captain Hook is a professional at murdering people. Gaston takes out the crocodile, Hook thanks him and rips his throat out. Next: Cafe Society, or Thread Games? ---
**Author:** ![Nema98](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/d2c977/32.png) [@Nema98](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nema98)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2016, 6:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/37 "2016-01-02T06:16:51Z")
Cafe Society, far more variety and topics. Iran or Turkey? ---
**Author:** ![Lobohan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobohan/32/79_2.png) [@Lobohan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobohan)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2016, 6:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/38 "2016-01-02T06:33:32Z")
> [@YogSosoth](#): > > Donald might be older, but he’s taller and has the weight advantage. His wife is a model, so while healthy, probably isn’t putting on muscles to defend herself. Donald wins but it would be close. > > Goku vs. Superman :D:D:D We have some documentary evidence: [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0MW9Nrg\_kZU](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0MW9Nrg_kZU) \<– Video ---
**Author:** ![TonySinclair](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/49beb7/32.png) [@TonySinclair](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TonySinclair)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2016, 6:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/39 "2016-01-02T06:41:06Z")
> [@Nema98](#): > > Cafe Society, far more variety and topics. > > Iran or Turkey? Turkey’s in NATO, so no contest. Walker, Texas Ranger or Lone Wolf McQuade? ETA: or would the space-time continuum be unable to contain the forces unleashed? ---
**Author:** ![Ranger\_Jeff](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranger_jeff/32/2065_2.png) [@Ranger\_Jeff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranger_Jeff)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2016, 7:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815/40 "2016-01-02T07:10:17Z")
The fabric of space and time would be torn to shreds. Clad only in bikini bottoms and white tee shirts and in a shallow but large inflatable pool filled with cold water, Ginger (from Gilligan’s Island) versus WKRP’s Jennifer? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-win-in-a-fight-between/741815.md?page=3)