# Who would you really want on your side in a pinch? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [February 20, 2022, 7:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-you-really-want-on-your-side-in-a-pinch/959833 "2022-02-20T19:10:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Marvin\_the\_Martian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/marvin_the_martian/32/2898_2.png) [@Marvin\_the\_Martian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marvin_the_Martian)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2022, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-you-really-want-on-your-side-in-a-pinch/959833/41 "2022-02-21T23:49:34Z")
A gumball machine with 10,000 Instant Martians and a bottle of water. ---
**Author:** ![kitap](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b9e5f3/32.png) [@kitap](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kitap)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2022, 12:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-you-really-want-on-your-side-in-a-pinch/959833/42 "2022-02-22T00:03:18Z")
The **Leverage** crew and Dean Winchester. ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2022, 2:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-you-really-want-on-your-side-in-a-pinch/959833/43 "2022-02-22T02:49:05Z")
Forrest Gump. Not only will we get out of the terrible situation we will end up rich and happy. ---
**Author:** ![peccavi](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/peccavi/32/388_2.png) [@peccavi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/peccavi)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2022, 3:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-you-really-want-on-your-side-in-a-pinch/959833/44 "2022-02-22T03:14:42Z")
Buffy Summers, doing her Gandhi impression\* \*You know, if he was really pissed off. ---
**Author:** ![dorvann](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/df705f/32.png) [@dorvann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dorvann)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2022, 3:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-you-really-want-on-your-side-in-a-pinch/959833/45 "2022-02-22T03:26:39Z")
> [@WildaBeast](#): > > Not a bad choice, except Q has no sense of loyalty. He’ll be on your side when it benefits him, and then abandon you when it doesn’t. Q is probably the one offering you the opportunity to pick one character -real or fictional- to team with. And then picking opponents for the your team to fight and then judging you for actions or in-actions. ---
**Author:** ![Infovore](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/infovore/32/420_2.png) [@Infovore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Infovore)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2022, 5:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-you-really-want-on-your-side-in-a-pinch/959833/46 "2022-02-22T05:03:06Z")
The Doctor. Probably Ten or Twelve. ---
**Author:** ![Smapti](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smapti/32/17938_2.png) [@Smapti](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smapti)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2022, 5:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-you-really-want-on-your-side-in-a-pinch/959833/47 "2022-02-22T05:11:53Z")
Superman. Hands down. ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2022, 5:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-you-really-want-on-your-side-in-a-pinch/959833/48 "2022-02-22T05:43:10Z")
Sgt Saunders and the squad from _ **Combat!** _ ---
**Author:** ![The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_other_waldo_pepper/32/12370_2.png) [@The\_Other\_Waldo\_Pepper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Other_Waldo_Pepper)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2022, 11:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-you-really-want-on-your-side-in-a-pinch/959833/49 "2022-02-22T11:47:53Z")
> [@don\_t\_ask](#): > > Forrest Gump. Not only will we get out of the terrible situation we will end up rich and happy. “Bubba was going to be a shrimping boat captain, but, instead, he died right there by that river in Vietnam.” ---
**Author:** ![xtenkfarpl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/c2a13f/32.png) [@xtenkfarpl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xtenkfarpl)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2022, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-you-really-want-on-your-side-in-a-pinch/959833/50 "2022-02-22T16:52:03Z")
I’d completely forgotten Jack. Yup, he’s a pretty resourceful fellow. I think Wilson has said he’s not going to write any more Repairman books because he doesn’t want to run the character into the ground. Maybe smart to quit while ahead, I guess… ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2022, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-you-really-want-on-your-side-in-a-pinch/959833/51 "2022-02-22T19:44:02Z")
> [@peccavi](#): > > Gandhi… > > You know, if he was really pissed off. What a coincidence, look what’s coming “next week”: [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/4ega5Rcct2s/maxresdefault.jpg "UHF (11/12) Movie CLIP - Gandhi II (1989) HD") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4ega5Rcct2s&t=1) ---
**Author:** ![Guest-starring\_Id](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guest-starring_id/32/21736_2.png) [@Guest-starring\_Id](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guest-starring_Id)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2022, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-you-really-want-on-your-side-in-a-pinch/959833/52 "2022-02-22T20:00:43Z")
> [@BlankSlate](#): > > Clifford, the big red dog. Ok, close, but I’m gonna have to go with The Littlest Hobo: https://www.youtube.com/embed/1-d-dA3E25Q?feature=oembed&wmode=opaque&list=PLyMIVzy133V0JiDV32UmYYU_N4D5RGhFn&start=44 ---
**Author:** ![erysichthon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/d07c76/32.png) [@erysichthon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/erysichthon)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2022, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-you-really-want-on-your-side-in-a-pinch/959833/53 "2022-02-22T20:07:18Z")
I’m surprised so many of you want Jack Reacher. I don’t think Reacher would be particularly interested in protecting me. **Me:** Reacher, there’s a gang of angry hoodlums approaching! Good thing I’ve got you here! **Reacher:** Don’t care. [He walks to the nearest highway, hitches a ride, and is gone.] I’ll go with Robocop. I could modify his programming so that he sticks around and doesn’t wander off to fight crime somewhere else. Also, he wouldn’t bother me with a lot of pointless conversation. ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2022, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-you-really-want-on-your-side-in-a-pinch/959833/54 "2022-02-22T20:13:14Z")
> [@Smapti](#): > > Superman. Hands down. It might be “Pants down”… Superman is known for [being a super-dick.](https://superdickery.com/tag/superman-is-a-dick/) And if you team up with him, expect him to turn on you with no warning. This is just one of a hundred examples: [https://superdickery.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/10/wf42specimenlane.jpg](https://superdickery.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/10/wf42specimenlane.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2022, 10:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-you-really-want-on-your-side-in-a-pinch/959833/55 "2022-02-22T22:28:40Z")
Kid Eternity. An obscure golden age DC character who has the ability to summon any historical (read: dead) or fictional character. Or group of characters. Why stop at Superman when you have the whole Justice League, plus Tarzan, plus Father Brown, plus Bugs Bunny? Oh, and Superman isn’t nearly as much of a dick any more. If fact, he married Lois in 1996 and they have a grown son. ---
**Author:** ![pjd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pjd/32/3009_2.png) [@pjd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pjd)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2022, 10:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-you-really-want-on-your-side-in-a-pinch/959833/56 "2022-02-22T22:41:03Z")
> [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](#): > > If fact, he married Lois in 1996 and they have a grown son. Is the son half human & half Uranian ? ---
**Author:** ![thorny\_locust](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thorny_locust/32/431_2.png) [@thorny\_locust](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thorny_locust)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2022, 11:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-you-really-want-on-your-side-in-a-pinch/959833/57 "2022-02-22T23:54:30Z")
Miles Vorkosigan. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2022, 2:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-you-really-want-on-your-side-in-a-pinch/959833/58 "2022-02-23T02:06:39Z")
> [@pjd](#): > > Is the son half human & half Uranian ? No, half Kryptonian and half human, as one would expect. 😀 ---
**Author:** ![Tibby](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tibby/32/17030_2.png) [@Tibby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tibby)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2022, 2:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-you-really-want-on-your-side-in-a-pinch/959833/59 "2022-02-23T02:58:20Z")
Typhoid Mary. Enemies will keep their distance. ---
**Author:** ![Ranchoth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranchoth/32/1066_2.png) [@Ranchoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranchoth)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2022, 3:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-you-really-want-on-your-side-in-a-pinch/959833/60 "2022-02-23T03:49:17Z")
[Derek Flint.](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Derek_Flint) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-you-really-want-on-your-side-in-a-pinch/959833.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-would-you-really-want-on-your-side-in-a-pinch/959833.md?page=4)