# Who Writes Sex Well? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [August 17, 2011, 7:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-writes-sex-well/593063 "2011-08-17T19:08:44Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![StusBlues](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dc4da7/32.png) [@StusBlues](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StusBlues)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2011, 7:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-writes-sex-well/593063/1 "2011-08-17T19:08:44Z")
I’m not necessarily asking for a great erotica writer here, though that may be workable as well. What I AM asking is what writers have the capability to make sex sexy in good, literate prose. Essentially, who is the antithesis of [Bill O’Reilly](http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/IKEAErotica)? So how about it? Who are your favorites? ---
**Author:** ![gaffa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e68b1a/32.png) [@gaffa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gaffa)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2011, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-writes-sex-well/593063/2 "2011-08-17T20:45:23Z")
The problem with discussions like this is that I can’t link to sites that have erotic content. I’m not impressed with the erotic scenes in mainstream novels. They’re either too coy, or the writing is too florid, as if the writers are embarrassed by sex and are trying to pretend that they are writing about something else. There is a huge amount of well-written, and very hot, sex on sites like [storiesonline.net](http://storiesonline.net) and [asstr.org](http://asstr.org). The problem is that it buried in a pit of truly awful writing. It is difficult to find the good stuff among the dross. It’s like interning at a publisher and being assigned to plow through the slush pile. There have been some excellent reviewers who can point you to the good stuff. My favorite, though she hasn’t been active for years, was a High School English teacher named Celeste who reviewed the stories posted on the Usenet newsgroup alt.sex.stories. Her Celestial Reviews would give three grades to stories: Athena (technical quality), Venus (plot & character) and Celeste (appeal to reviewer) on a scale from 1 to 10. Any story that got straight 9s would be (in my opinion) as good as any erotic writing that you could find on the shelves of a bookstore, and better than most. Storiesonline has a rating system as well, but it is nowhere near as reliable. It is influenced by voters who have particular biases and will down-vote any story that squicks them, no matter how well written. I know this is not what you asked for, but as I said, I’ve not been too impressed by the erotic content of mainstream literature. I much prefer the honesty of someone who sets out to write erotica. Forgot to mention. Celeste also published a Dirty Grammar Guide to improve the quality of erotic writing. One particular annoyance was using the wrong word: > [@](#): > > Freshly Fucked Glow" by Leanna ([lean...@hotmail.com](mailto:lean...@hotmail.com)). > > If I may belabor a vocabulary point - the glow mentioned in the title would > qualify as an aureole. The areas around the protagonist’s nipples, stimulated > first by the British lover and then by the hostess of the house, are areolas. > It is rare to find an example of both in the same story – outside Butler’s > Lives of the Saints, which is not nearly as interesting as this story. If > you’re interested in “Butler’s Lives of the Saints,” try reading “Angela’s > Ashes,” which does mention the sex lives of a couple saints in an interesting > context, but doesn’t use either of the A-words. ---
**Author:** ![RealityChuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/realitychuck/32/195_2.png) [@RealityChuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RealityChuck)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2011, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-writes-sex-well/593063/3 "2011-08-17T20:50:27Z")
I was surprised a couple of years ago when I picked up a paranormal romance novel (\*\*You Slay Me \*\*by Katie MacAlister) and found the best thing about it was the sex scenes. They were hardly explicit, but they were describing some fairly explicit acts in a sensual and erotic manner. I doubt MacAlister is in the top of her field, so there may be even better work by others. ---
**Author:** ![KneadToKnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kneadtoknow/32/3999_2.png) [@KneadToKnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KneadToKnow)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2011, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-writes-sex-well/593063/4 "2011-08-17T20:53:41Z")
Nicholson Baker’s _The Fermatta_ and _Vox_ both have some pretty good sections. The latter indulges in fetishes that happen turn me off, personally, but up until that, I’ll confess I had a chubby for much of the book. N.b.: It’s been upwards of 15 years since I read these. ---
**Author:** ![Icerigger](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/icerigger/32/432_2.png) [@Icerigger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Icerigger)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2011, 10:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-writes-sex-well/593063/5 "2011-08-17T22:44:52Z")
Jean M Auel;) ---
**Author:** ![GilaB](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/8e7dd6/32.png) [@GilaB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GilaB)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2011, 12:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-writes-sex-well/593063/6 "2011-08-18T00:47:03Z")
> [@KneadToKnow](#): > > Nicholson Baker’s _The Fermatta_ and _Vox_ both have some pretty good sections. The latter indulges in fetishes that happen turn me off, personally, but up until that, I’ll confess I had a chubby for much of the book. > > N.b.: It’s been upwards of 15 years since I read these. He’s got a new sex-related book out. I haven’t read any of his work, but it was discussed in a New York Times Magazine profile of him a couple of weeks ago, and more recently [reviewed](http://www.nytimes.com/2011/08/14/books/review/house-of-holes-by-nicholson-baker-book-review.html?ref=books) (positively) in their Book Review. ---
**Author:** ![Yeticus\_Rex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/a698b9/32.png) [@Yeticus\_Rex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yeticus_Rex)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2011, 12:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-writes-sex-well/593063/7 "2011-08-18T00:55:21Z")
> [@gaffa](#): > > The problem with discussions like this is that I can’t link to sites that have erotic content. If they are published, chances are they are on Amazon. For example, [Nancy Friday](http://www.amazon.com/Nancy-Friday/e/B000APBBJ4) is author and collector/collaborator of erotic stories/fantasies that are from women. ---
**Author:** ![hilltopper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c68b51/32.png) [@hilltopper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hilltopper)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2011, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-writes-sex-well/593063/8 "2011-08-18T19:06:57Z")
Anne Rice under the pseudonym Anne Rampling, published a series of erotica called The Sleeping Beauty novels. Well written, hot, raw… ---
**Author:** ![BrassyPhrase](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ea666f/32.png) [@BrassyPhrase](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrassyPhrase)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2011, 2:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-writes-sex-well/593063/9 "2011-08-19T02:29:29Z")
> [@hilltopper](#): > > Anne Rice under the pseudonym Anne Rampling, published a series of erotica called The Sleeping Beauty novels. > > Well written, hot, raw… Came here to mention her and beaten to it. The funny thing is, I can’t stand the rest of her writing at all. But those erotica novels are HOT. …um, not that I read such things of course!😉 ---
**Author:** ![StusBlues](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dc4da7/32.png) [@StusBlues](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StusBlues)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2011, 2:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-writes-sex-well/593063/10 "2011-08-19T14:05:20Z")
> [@hilltopper](#): > > Anne Rice under the pseudonym Anne Rampling, published a series of erotica called The Sleeping Beauty novels. > > Well written, hot, raw… Y’see, I’ve picked those up, and they REALLY aren’t my cuppa. I’m too vanilla, I guess. Her counterpart, Sherrilyn Kenyon, was more my style. It’s not great writing, but the sex scenes are reasonably well done. ---
**Author:** ![Acsenray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/acsenray/32/4519_2.png) [@Acsenray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acsenray)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2011, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-writes-sex-well/593063/11 "2011-08-19T15:59:50Z")
William Boyd has written some good sex scenes, in _An Ice-Cream War_ and _The Blue Afternoon_ ---
**Author:** ![Biggirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biggirl/32/3294_2.png) [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2011, 4:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-writes-sex-well/593063/12 "2011-08-19T16:17:01Z")
> [@hilltopper](#): > > Anne Rice under the pseudonym Anne Rampling, published a series of erotica called The Sleeping Beauty novels. > > Well written, hot, raw… Came here to mention this. She does tend toward the S&M side of things. Did I say “tend”? I meant she’s really into bondage and humiliation. She does do it very well, though. ---
**Author:** ![Brynda](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e79b87/32.png) [@Brynda](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Brynda)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2011, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-writes-sex-well/593063/13 "2011-08-19T16:39:07Z")
Jennifer Crusie writes some pretty hot scenes in her light romantic novels. ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2011, 4:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-writes-sex-well/593063/14 "2011-08-19T16:51:03Z")
Dear Penthouse, ---
**Author:** ![njtt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ecd19e/32.png) [@njtt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/njtt)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2011, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-writes-sex-well/593063/15 "2011-08-19T17:22:20Z")
Updike. ---
**Author:** ![Becky2844](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@Becky2844](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Becky2844)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2011, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-writes-sex-well/593063/16 "2011-08-19T19:51:18Z")
Don’t have a written example here, but I think restraint and innuendo make the desire exquisite. Near the end of the movie The Horse Whisperer, when Robert Redford is dancing with the girl, the way that he almost pulled her close—but didn’t, made his desire for her palatable. Took my breath away. ---
**Author:** ![Jaledin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Jaledin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jaledin)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2011, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-writes-sex-well/593063/17 "2011-08-19T19:53:58Z")
Joë Bousquet. Henry Miller, sort of – if you like cunt sandwiches and all that. ---
**Author:** ![KneadToKnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kneadtoknow/32/3999_2.png) [@KneadToKnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KneadToKnow)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2011, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-writes-sex-well/593063/18 "2011-08-19T20:20:03Z")
> [@Jaledin](#): > > Henry Miller, sort of – if you like cunt sandwiches and all that. That reminds me, Anaïs Nin has some scorching hot passages as I recall, as well. ---
**Author:** ![jagaj244](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/41988e/32.png) [@jagaj244](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jagaj244)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2012, 11:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-writes-sex-well/593063/19 "2012-04-15T23:35:39Z")
Anne Rice is so repetitive that she becomes boring after about three pages. I believe the ‘interpersonal activities’ in Benjamin Garrick’s novels to be very well done. SEE: “Detroit: Spring Gold” “Detroit: Summer Blue” “Detroit: Autumn Red” All are, at present out of print, but can be found, used, on the internet. I’d be interested in evaluations. jagaj244 ---
**Author:** ![ToeJam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/dfb087/32.png) [@ToeJam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ToeJam)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2012, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-writes-sex-well/593063/20 "2012-04-15T23:49:39Z")
> [@Icerigger](#): > > Jean M Auel;) Yeah. Those books were NOT about Dinosaurs and Sabertooth tigers. I think 13-14year old me had my mind blown by some of the stuff in that series. That said. They’re still a guilty pleasure. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/who-writes-sex-well/593063.md?page=2)