# Whom shall I take as my new god? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [October 6, 2010, 2:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whom-shall-i-take-as-my-new-god/556252 "2010-10-06T14:07:59Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Thudlow\_Boink](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thudlow_boink/32/320_2.png) [@Thudlow\_Boink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thudlow_Boink)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2010, 4:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whom-shall-i-take-as-my-new-god/556252/21 "2010-10-06T16:48:40Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > For reasons that need not concern you infidels, I have decided to move to a twelve-day rotation for my worship schedule. Currently the rotation is nine-days long; it goes Athena, Anansi, Edda-Thor, Marvel Comics-Thor, Superman, Inanna, Bailey Quarters, Athena, Leroy Jethro Gibbs. (And yes, I am perfectly aware that Athena is on the list twice.) Why did Aslan get dropped from the [rotation](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=12953131&postcount=5)? ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2010, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whom-shall-i-take-as-my-new-god/556252/22 "2010-10-06T16:53:33Z")
> [@Thudlow\_Boink](#): > > > [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > > > For reasons that need not concern you infidels, I have decided to move to a twelve-day rotation for my worship schedule. Currently the rotation is nine-days long; it goes Athena, Anansi, Edda-Thor, Marvel Comics-Thor, Superman, Inanna, Bailey Quarters, Athena, Leroy Jethro Gibbs. (And yes, I am perfectly aware that Athena is on the list twice.) > > Why did Aslan get dropped from the [rotation](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=12953131&postcount=5)? Only Morgoth has been dropped, in his account of being a feckless wanker who couldn’t even take out an Elf. Aslan is over all, of course, I should think that would be obvious. He is the High King over all Other Kings. Says so right on the tin. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2010, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whom-shall-i-take-as-my-new-god/556252/23 "2010-10-06T16:56:38Z")
Since my star pupil is out of the running, might I recommend Anoia, Bibulous, or Coyote? ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2010, 5:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whom-shall-i-take-as-my-new-god/556252/24 "2010-10-06T17:05:54Z")
> [@silenus](#): > > Since my star pupil is out of the running, might I recommend Anoia, Bibulous, or Coyote? I will consider the latter, as sometimes the Spider is busy. On the other hand Raven is already on the short list and Coyote’s a wanker anyway. As for the other two, I have no interest in worshipping anything from Discworld and refuse to believe you didn’t make up _Bibulous_ anyway. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2010, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whom-shall-i-take-as-my-new-god/556252/25 "2010-10-06T17:13:40Z")
What about Bugs Bunny? A more modern incarnation of the Trickster is always amusing. And the children like him. ---
**Author:** ![Peeta\_Mellark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/bc8723/32.png) [@Peeta\_Mellark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peeta_Mellark)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2010, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whom-shall-i-take-as-my-new-god/556252/26 "2010-10-06T17:23:21Z")
Why is the Morrígan not on here? Are you _trying_ to get yourself killed? ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2010, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whom-shall-i-take-as-my-new-god/556252/27 "2010-10-06T17:31:43Z")
> [@Peeta\_Mellark](#): > > Why is the Morrígan not on here? Are you _trying_ to get yourself killed? See post 18. I will allow you to mock yourself. ---
**Author:** ![Knorf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/58956e/32.png) [@Knorf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knorf)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2010, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whom-shall-i-take-as-my-new-god/556252/28 "2010-10-06T17:38:53Z")
Worship the sun. At least it’s real. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2010, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whom-shall-i-take-as-my-new-god/556252/29 "2010-10-06T17:46:53Z")
> [@Knorf](#): > > Worship the sun. At least it’s real. Any further suggestion that any of the aforementioned deities – and in particular Athena, either Thor, or Bailey Quarters – are unreal will be punished by beheading, firing squad, burning alive, strangulation, drowning in a sea of caterpillers, and being forced to watch a Nancy Grace marathon. In that order. ---
**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2010, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whom-shall-i-take-as-my-new-god/556252/30 "2010-10-06T17:48:03Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > > [@silenus](#): > > > > Since my star pupil is out of the running, might I recommend Anoia, Bibulous, or Coyote? > > I will consider the latter, as sometimes the Spider is busy. On the other hand Raven is already on the short list and Coyote’s a wanker anyway. > > … I’m going to have to ask you to take that back. ---
**Author:** ![StusBlues](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dc4da7/32.png) [@StusBlues](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StusBlues)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2010, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whom-shall-i-take-as-my-new-god/556252/31 "2010-10-06T17:52:54Z")
Babe Ruth. No commentary needed. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2010, 6:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whom-shall-i-take-as-my-new-god/556252/32 "2010-10-06T18:00:42Z")
Worshipping me might do you some good. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![G0sp3l](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c68b51/32.png) [@G0sp3l](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/G0sp3l)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2010, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whom-shall-i-take-as-my-new-god/556252/33 "2010-10-06T18:06:30Z")
Why is this even a question? Shiva. The Destroyer. The Shatterer of Worlds. All others are posers. Any god can be annoying or mind-shattering but THE BIG BOYS can leave the omniverse a dessicated husk. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Second\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bbe5ce/32.png) [@The\_Second\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Second_Stone)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2010, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whom-shall-i-take-as-my-new-god/556252/34 "2010-10-06T18:25:36Z")
Dopers can be in your pantheon. Flawed and amusing. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Excellent](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f19dbf/32.png) [@Mr.Excellent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Excellent)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2010, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whom-shall-i-take-as-my-new-god/556252/35 "2010-10-06T18:28:48Z")
Kristen Bell? Between “Veronica Mars” and “Reefer Madness: The Musical”, I could certainly buy it… ---
**Author:** ![pravnik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8edcca/32.png) [@pravnik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pravnik)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2010, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whom-shall-i-take-as-my-new-god/556252/36 "2010-10-06T18:31:15Z")
> [@Knorf](#): > > Worship the sun. At least it’s real. Yeah, you gotta throw the Sun and Moon in there, for tradition’s sake. I’d try to fit the other five classical planets and their corresponding deities as well. ---
**Author:** ![Mollie\_Magill](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mollie_magill/32/20882_2.png) [@Mollie\_Magill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mollie_Magill)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2010, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whom-shall-i-take-as-my-new-god/556252/37 "2010-10-06T18:34:55Z")
> [@Attack\_from\_the\_3rd\_dimension](#): > > However, on review, I will now also submit **Pele** - the volcano goddess, not the footie god. One of the few deities you can still pick up hitchhiking. **Pele** ’s always a good choice. She’s _still_ punishing Hawaii for daring to tap her for geothermal “free” energy. > [@TruCelt](#): > > Hades, definitely. It’s always a mistake to spend all your devotion on Gods who may, if your devotion is perfect, and they’re having a good day, make your life better here on Earth. > > But by any measure you will be spending far more years dead than alive, so start now to invest in your long-term happiness and comfort. Your logic is sound. ---
**Author:** ![Knorf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/58956e/32.png) [@Knorf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knorf)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2010, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whom-shall-i-take-as-my-new-god/556252/38 "2010-10-06T18:44:17Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > > [@Knorf](#): > > > > Worship the sun. At least it’s real. > > Any further suggestion that any of the aforementioned deities – and in particular Athena, either Thor, or Bailey Quarters – are unreal will be punished by beheading, firing squad, burning alive, strangulation, drowning in a sea of caterpillers, and being forced to watch a Nancy Grace marathon. > > In that order. Do your worst, pagan! 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Tamerlane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tamerlane/32/7602_2.png) [@Tamerlane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tamerlane)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2010, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whom-shall-i-take-as-my-new-god/556252/39 "2010-10-06T18:58:02Z")
**Ba’al Hammon**. If you’re not willing to put the work in to construct a giant bronze statue and burn children to death in its grasp, then you just aren’t serious about your faith. ---
**Author:** ![Attack\_from\_the\_3rd\_dimension](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b38774/32.png) [@Attack\_from\_the\_3rd\_dimension](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Attack_from_the_3rd_dimension)\ **Post date:** [October 6, 2010, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whom-shall-i-take-as-my-new-god/556252/40 "2010-10-06T19:06:48Z")
> [@pravnik](#): > > > [@Knorf](#): > > > > Worship the sun. At least it’s real. > > Yeah, you gotta throw the Sun and Moon in there, for tradition’s sake. I’d try to fit the other five classical planets and their corresponding deities as well. Ah, screw it, just go with Uranus. People will ask about your religion, and you can just say “I worship Uranus”, and then they’ll kind of blush and stammer and say “Uh..Um..Thanks, I guess”. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whom-shall-i-take-as-my-new-god/556252.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whom-shall-i-take-as-my-new-god/556252.md?page=3)