# Whoo Hoo! I'm getting compensation from the UN's Scam Victims Fund **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 10, 2011, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whoo-hoo-im-getting-compensation-from-the-uns-scam-victims-fund/570915 "2011-02-10T17:36:32Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 18\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2011, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whoo-hoo-im-getting-compensation-from-the-uns-scam-victims-fund/570915/1 "2011-02-10T17:36:32Z")
> [@](#): > > British Government/ United Nation.DEBTS CENTRE, > 3/5 Whitehall Court, LONDON, SW1A 2EL. > OFFICE OF THE BG/UN.FINANCIAL AUDITORS, > British Government /United Nation. > COMPENSATION CENTER, > 3/5 Whitehall Court, LONDON, SW1A 2EL. > > UNITED NATION COMPENSATION OFFICE / UNITED NATIONS 2007/2008 SCAM VICTIMS COMPENSATIONS PAYMENT. > > FROM THE DESK OF MRS. DORIS JONES > > ATTN: > > REF/PAYMENTS CODE: AFB/XXETETE[$860,000 USD.] > > Re: United Nation Compensation for Fraud Victims. > > This is to bring to your notice that we are delegated from the UNITED NATIONS in African Development Bank to pay 150 victims of scam $860,000 USD (Eight Hundred and sixty thousand Dollars Only each).You are listed and approved for this payment as one of the scammed victims to be paid this amount, get back to this office as soon as possible for the immediate payments of your $860,000 USD compensations funds. > > On this faithful recommendations,we want you to know that during the last U.N. meetings held at Abuja, Nigeria, it was alarming on the money lost by various individuals to the scams artists operating in syndicates all over the world today. > > In other to compensate victims, the UNITED NATIONS Body is now paying 150 victims $860,000 USD each in accordance with the UNITED NATIONS recommendations. Due to the corrupt and inefficient Banking Systems in Nigeria,the payments are to be paid by Oceanic bank Ltd as corresponding paying bank under funding assistance by the governments of USA , CANADA and BRITAIN. > > Any benefactor of this compensation award will have to be first cleared and recommended for payment by UNITED NATION… According to the number of applicants at hand, 114 Beneficiaries has been paid, over a half of the victims are from the United States, we still have an outstanding of 36 scam victims left to be paid. Other victims who have not been contacted can submit their application as well for scrutiny and possible consideration. > > We shall feed you with further modalities as soon as we get response from you on how you intend receiving your compensation payment. > > Yours Faithfully, > MRS DORIS JONES > FOR MANAGEMENT Well, it’s about time! :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![Scuba\_Ben](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/278dde/32.png) [@Scuba\_Ben](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scuba_Ben)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2011, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whoo-hoo-im-getting-compensation-from-the-uns-scam-victims-fund/570915/2 "2011-02-10T17:48:47Z")
They’re going to “feed you with further modalities.” I hope they’re providing the nutritional information and ingredients of the modalities. ---
**Author:** ![Giles](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giles/32/60_2.png) [@Giles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giles)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2011, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whoo-hoo-im-getting-compensation-from-the-uns-scam-victims-fund/570915/3 "2011-02-10T17:59:45Z")
I wonder why they think Her Majesty’s Government in the United Kingdom would refer to itself as “British Government”, with “BG” as an abbreviation. ---
**Author:** ![PunditLisa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/4af34b/32.png) [@PunditLisa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PunditLisa)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2011, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whoo-hoo-im-getting-compensation-from-the-uns-scam-victims-fund/570915/4 "2011-02-10T18:06:20Z")
Dammit, I’ve been scammed numerous times and the UN hasn’t sent me one red cent! ---
**Author:** ![Dallas\_Jones](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dallas_jones/32/3277_2.png) [@Dallas\_Jones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dallas_Jones)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2011, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whoo-hoo-im-getting-compensation-from-the-uns-scam-victims-fund/570915/5 "2011-02-10T18:10:03Z")
Mrs. Doris Jones. Yeah right, like that’s a real name. ---
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2011, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whoo-hoo-im-getting-compensation-from-the-uns-scam-victims-fund/570915/6 "2011-02-10T18:31:09Z")
You know it has to be true. The meeting was held in Nigeria! ---
**Author:** ![Alice\_The\_Goon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Alice\_The\_Goon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alice_The_Goon)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2011, 6:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whoo-hoo-im-getting-compensation-from-the-uns-scam-victims-fund/570915/7 "2011-02-10T18:33:00Z")
Woo! Party at **Annie** ’s house!! ---
**Author:** ![MoodIndigo1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e8c25b/32.png) [@MoodIndigo1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MoodIndigo1)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2011, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whoo-hoo-im-getting-compensation-from-the-uns-scam-victims-fund/570915/8 "2011-02-10T18:49:58Z")
Hey, Doris Jones tried to convince my husband that he had inherited vast amounts of money just a few weeks ago. How do I know that? I actually knew a Doris Jones, so the name struck me. Still, if this time Doris Jones is on the level, we’ll have a huge bash in New Jersey sometime soon!! Yippee! ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2011, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whoo-hoo-im-getting-compensation-from-the-uns-scam-victims-fund/570915/9 "2011-02-10T18:53:28Z")
As long as the modalities are there, and as long as it’s the UNITED NATIONS, you’re gold. Go for it! ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2011, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whoo-hoo-im-getting-compensation-from-the-uns-scam-victims-fund/570915/10 "2011-02-10T19:02:30Z")
You know it’s a scam because the real compensation payments are being made by the DIVIDED NATIONS! ---
**Author:** ![Martini\_Enfield](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/martini_enfield/32/11123_2.png) [@Martini\_Enfield](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Martini_Enfield)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2011, 6:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whoo-hoo-im-getting-compensation-from-the-uns-scam-victims-fund/570915/11 "2011-02-11T06:51:36Z")
> [@Giles](#): > > I wonder why they think Her Majesty’s Government in the United Kingdom would refer to itself as “British Government”, with “BG” as an abbreviation. Or why they’d have a “Compensation _Center_” :dubious: (italics mine) ---
**Author:** ![kambuckta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/53a042/32.png) [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2011, 7:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whoo-hoo-im-getting-compensation-from-the-uns-scam-victims-fund/570915/12 "2011-02-11T07:32:33Z")
I haven’t been scammed in _soooo_ long, I’m starting to feel neglected. Why don’t they think I’m worthy of being duped. S’not fair. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2011, 7:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whoo-hoo-im-getting-compensation-from-the-uns-scam-victims-fund/570915/13 "2011-02-11T07:52:13Z")
> [@Martini\_Enfield](#): > > Or why they’d have a “Compensation _Center_” :dubious: (italics mine) That’s an easy one. They’re socialists, and everyone is a victim, the criminals most of all. ---
**Author:** ![Martini\_Enfield](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/martini_enfield/32/11123_2.png) [@Martini\_Enfield](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Martini_Enfield)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2011, 8:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whoo-hoo-im-getting-compensation-from-the-uns-scam-victims-fund/570915/14 "2011-02-11T08:03:46Z")
> [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > That’s an easy one. They’re socialists, and everyone is a victim, the criminals most of all. Erm… not quite what I was getting at, old boy. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![kambuckta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/53a042/32.png) [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2011, 8:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whoo-hoo-im-getting-compensation-from-the-uns-scam-victims-fund/570915/15 "2011-02-11T08:21:20Z")
> [@Martini\_Enfield](#): > > Erm… not quite what I was getting at, old boy. 😉 He’s an _American_ **Martini** , can’t spell proper English or smell a whoosh either. Forgive the poor old bugger. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2011, 1:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whoo-hoo-im-getting-compensation-from-the-uns-scam-victims-fund/570915/16 "2011-02-11T13:41:53Z")
> [@kambuckta](#): > > He’s an _American_ **Martini** That’s the best kind. ---
**Author:** ![cantara](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6f9a4e/32.png) [@cantara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cantara)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2011, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whoo-hoo-im-getting-compensation-from-the-uns-scam-victims-fund/570915/17 "2011-02-11T15:35:09Z")
Someone there has seen Inception…they acknowledge there are Nigerian Scams, but this isn’t one of them. ---
**Author:** ![Philster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/13edae/32.png) [@Philster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Philster)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2011, 3:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/whoo-hoo-im-getting-compensation-from-the-uns-scam-victims-fund/570915/18 "2011-02-11T15:39:45Z")
> [@kambuckta](#): > > He’s an _American_ **Martini** , can’t spell proper English or smell a whoosh either. > > Forgive the poor old bugger. > > 😃 What’s an American Martini? Is that better than a dirty Martini? Were you saying something about proper English? Do proper English folks use commas, or do they forget them after gulping down one too many American Martinis? ETA: Missing commas _and_ a comma where one does not belong = Proper English? 🆒