# Why are "8 maids a-milking" so cheap? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [December 6, 2018, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-8-maids-a-milking-so-cheap/825695 "2018-12-06T18:14:32Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![StGermain](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stgermain/32/2868_2.png) [@StGermain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StGermain)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2018, 3:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-8-maids-a-milking-so-cheap/825695/21 "2018-12-07T03:12:38Z")
Cows are milked twice a day. 4 teats per cow, two milkings, means only one cow is required for one day. As for pay, I don’t see any milkmaids on my local Craigslist, but ranch hand apparently pays housing and whatever tips you can glean from the tourists. > [@](#): > > We are looking for a honest, hard working individual to work on our ranch. Duties will include taking care of dogs, horses, fencing, helping with roping nights, caring for pigs, riding horses, caring for horses, doing trail rides. We include housing, electric, water, heat/air, and all tips from trail rides, as well as commission on all horse sales. Please if you can’t saddle a horse, ride a horse, lift over 75lbs, stay inside or on your cell phone all day, or whine about working please do not waste our time. We are a working ranch which means we run all year long. StG ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2018, 3:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-8-maids-a-milking-so-cheap/825695/22 "2018-12-07T03:53:55Z")
> [@StGermain](#): > > Cows are milked twice a day. 4 teats per cow, two milkings, means only one cow is required for one day. > > As for pay, I don’t see any milkmaids on my local Craigslist, but ranch hand apparently pays housing and whatever tips you can glean from the tourists. > > StG I can’t find any information on milkmaids, but corn detassling,a traditional first job for many rural kids, [starts at $9/hr.](https://www.notafraidtosweat.com/common-questions/#1519061830957-8d6fb156-101a) ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2018, 4:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-8-maids-a-milking-so-cheap/825695/23 "2018-12-07T04:06:13Z")
> [@Anny\_Middon](#): > > According to [this article](https://www.usatoday.com/story/money/2018/11/15/price-12-days-christmas-gifts/2004002002/), the current price of the “Twelve Days of Christmas” gifts is over $39,000. > > I assume that the gifts that are people doing something are priced at what it could cost to have them go to the recipient’s home and do their thing for an hour or so. Given that, I guess the price of $2,800+ for eleven pipers piping and $3,000+ for twelve drummers drumming make sense. > > But eight maids a-milking will set you back only $58? This must be based on the rosy-eyed assumption that the recipient just happens to have eight dairy cows, but even so – you can really get a maid to visit someone’s home to milk a cow for a bit over $7? Must … not … make … sexist … joke ---
**Author:** ![Kimstu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ecd19e/32.png) [@Kimstu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimstu)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2018, 5:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-8-maids-a-milking-so-cheap/825695/24 "2018-12-07T05:23:39Z")
> [@Siam\_Sam](#): > > Must … not … make … sexist … joke I think the discrepancy might be more a classist than a sexist thing. Maids milking are cheaper than ladies dancing. ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2018, 5:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-8-maids-a-milking-so-cheap/825695/25 "2018-12-07T05:25:11Z")
> [@Kimstu](#): > > I think the discrepancy might be more a classist than a sexist thing. Maids milking are cheaper than ladies dancing. Mmm, baby. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2018, 1:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-8-maids-a-milking-so-cheap/825695/26 "2018-12-07T13:11:50Z")
> [@Anny\_Middon](#): > > I guess that minimum wage makes some sense, but not much. I think you’re assuming a lot if you assume that someone you can get for minimum wage in any urban area actually knows how to milk a cow. Minimum wage doesn’t apply to many agricultural jobs, which I think includes dairy herd management. The apple orchard near me hires pickers every year. Most of them pick every year and are pretty good at their job. They are paid according to how much they pick, and they make well over minimum wage. But some first-timers do so poorly that they don’t even come close to minimum wage. ---
**Author:** ![Spiderman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiderman/32/230_2.png) [@Spiderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiderman)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2018, 3:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-8-maids-a-milking-so-cheap/825695/27 "2018-12-07T15:01:17Z")
According to my [research](https://www.homeadvisor.com/r/pros-cons-and-costs-maid-services/) it would cost at around $300 > [@HomeAdvisor](#): > > Just what does a good maid service charge? **Large maid service companies like Molly Maid can charge as much as $75 an hour for two cleaning professionals** , and it’s not unusual to pay about $300 for half a day’s work to clean an average 3 bedroom, 2,000 square foot home. > [@Filbert](#): > > The specification says ‘maids a milking’ not ‘milked cows’. Maybe it’s a fetish thing. A wet nurse??? ---
**Author:** ![BobLibDem](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/boblibdem/32/3149_2.png) [@BobLibDem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BobLibDem)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2018, 4:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-8-maids-a-milking-so-cheap/825695/28 "2018-12-07T16:12:04Z")
What I want to know is did they multiply out the number of times the gift was repeated? The partridge in the pear tree was given 12 times, one for each of the twelve days. The two turtle doves were given 11 times, for 22 birds in all, and so on. ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2018, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-8-maids-a-milking-so-cheap/825695/29 "2018-12-07T17:26:51Z")
Priceless! ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [December 7, 2018, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-8-maids-a-milking-so-cheap/825695/30 "2018-12-07T21:11:06Z")
> [@BobLibDem](#): > > What I want to know is did they multiply out the number of times the gift was repeated? The partridge in the pear tree was given 12 times, one for each of the twelve days. The two turtle doves were given 11 times, for 22 birds in all, and so on. Reading the article, it appears that they did not, and each gift was only counted once. Which I think is wrong - each verse lists what was given on each day. The only way you could economize is to give the partridge and the pear tree on the first day, then one partridge per day after that. Because the song doesn’t say it’s the only partridge in the pear tree - just that it is in a pear tree. Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![muldoonthief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muldoonthief/32/3188_2.png) [@muldoonthief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/muldoonthief)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2018, 12:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-8-maids-a-milking-so-cheap/825695/31 "2018-12-08T00:05:30Z")
> [@BobLibDem](#): > > What I want to know is did they multiply out the number of times the gift was repeated? The partridge in the pear tree was given 12 times, one for each of the twelve days. The two turtle doves were given 11 times, for 22 birds in all, and so on. The PNC website I linked to above has the total for that methodology being $170,609. Nearly half of that ($78,750) is the goddamn swans - apparently they run a cool $1875 each. ---
**Author:** ![davidm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/davidm/32/225_2.png) [@davidm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/davidm)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2018, 12:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-8-maids-a-milking-so-cheap/825695/32 "2018-12-08T00:53:00Z")
A related question: I don’t think I’ve ever heard Christmas described as having 12 days other than in this song. Is this some European thing, or maybe an idea from the past that we no longer use? ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2018, 1:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-8-maids-a-milking-so-cheap/825695/33 "2018-12-08T01:15:09Z")
> [@davidm](#): > > A related question: > I don’t think I’ve ever heard Christmas described as having 12 days other than in this song. Is this some European thing, or maybe an idea from the past that we no longer use? It’s the twelve days from the celebration of the Nativity (December 25) to the celebration of the Epiphany (January 6). The Nativity was when Jesus was born. The Epiphany was when people became aware that Jesus was divine. ---
**Author:** ![Anny\_Middon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/bc79bd/32.png) [@Anny\_Middon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anny_Middon)\ **Post date:** [December 8, 2018, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-8-maids-a-milking-so-cheap/825695/34 "2018-12-08T17:31:49Z")
> [@muldoonthief](#): > > The PNC website I linked to above has the total for that methodology being $170,609. Nearly half of that ($78,750) is the goddamn swans - apparently they run a cool $1875 each. Wikipedia says the song dates back to 1780. I imagine even a large country estate back then couldn’t really accommodate 42 swans. But then, they ate swans in those days. “Dammit, Alice, swan for dinner _again_!” ---
**Author:** ![Xema](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/9de053/32.png) [@Xema](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Xema)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2018, 1:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-8-maids-a-milking-so-cheap/825695/35 "2018-12-09T01:30:45Z")
With clever planning, both the swans and the geese could be a profit center, helping to finance the various lords, ladies & maids. Mute Swans (likely the species that the songwriters had in mind) are an invasive species in the New World, and definitely a problem in some areas. Canada Geese are in many places so numerous as to be a major nuisance. I think you could arrange to collect the number you need and charge a substantial fee for this pest-removal service. ---
**Author:** ![Slow\_Moving\_Vehicle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slow_moving_vehicle/32/291_2.png) [@Slow\_Moving\_Vehicle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slow_Moving_Vehicle)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2018, 3:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-8-maids-a-milking-so-cheap/825695/36 "2018-12-09T03:49:28Z")
> [@Xema](#): > > With clever planning, both the swans and the geese could be a profit center, helping to finance the various lords, ladies & maids. > > Mute Swans (likely the species that the songwriters had in mind) are an invasive species in the New World, and definitely a problem in some areas. Canada Geese are in many places so numerous as to be a major nuisance. I think you could arrange to collect the number you need and charge a substantial fee for this pest-removal service. The maids could be a profit center, too: just open up a massage parlor. Who says the eight maids are milking _cows_? ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2018, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-8-maids-a-milking-so-cheap/825695/37 "2018-12-09T04:15:26Z")
And Twelve Days of Christmas is still a thing, at least in Catholic churches. It’s one of the five liturgical seasons, along with Advent, Lent, Easter, and Ordinary Time. ---
**Author:** ![Peter\_Morris](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/peter_morris/32/359_2.png) [@Peter\_Morris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peter_Morris)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2018, 5:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-8-maids-a-milking-so-cheap/825695/38 "2018-12-09T05:03:18Z")
[Twelfth Night](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Twelfth_Night) \*Twelfth Night, or What You Will[notes 1] is a comedy by William Shakespeare, believed to have been written around 1601–1602 as a Twelfth Night’s entertainment for the close of the Christmas season. \* [Twelfth Night (holiday)](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Twelfth_Night_(holiday)) \*Twelfth Night is a festival in some branches of Christianity marking the coming of the Epiphany. Different traditions mark the date of Twelfth Night on either 5 January or 6 January … \* ---
**Author:** ![PatrickLondon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/patricklondon/32/4422_2.png) [@PatrickLondon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PatrickLondon)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2018, 5:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-8-maids-a-milking-so-cheap/825695/39 "2018-12-09T05:49:47Z")
Never mind the cost, think of the recipient: [https://soundcloud.com/brian-sibley/and-yet-another-partridge-in-a](https://soundcloud.com/brian-sibley/and-yet-another-partridge-in-a) ---
**Author:** ![I\_Love\_Me\_Vol.I](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/i_love_me_vol.i/32/521_2.png) [@I\_Love\_Me\_Vol.I](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/I_Love_Me_Vol.I)\ **Post date:** [December 9, 2018, 8:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-8-maids-a-milking-so-cheap/825695/40 "2018-12-09T08:07:32Z")
Aren’t there still a few states where it’s illegal to procure a maid for milking purposes at any price at all? 😛 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-8-maids-a-milking-so-cheap/825695.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-8-maids-a-milking-so-cheap/825695.md?page=3)