# Why are American sports so boring? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [May 21, 2001, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-sports-so-boring/66131 "2001-05-21T23:02:17Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Magic\_Merlin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df788c/32.png) [@Magic\_Merlin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Magic_Merlin)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2001, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-sports-so-boring/66131/1 "2001-05-21T23:02:17Z")
I’m a proud native of Wales (that’s in the UK for the majority of you who probably don’t know), and when I see American football or baseball on TV at 3:00 am, I wonder what the hell is the attraction of these sports? In American football, the crowd get all excited when a player runs more than 5 yards without dropping to the ground. And as for baseball, all that sport seems to be about is a guy throwing a ball to another guy who hits it up into the air with his bat for another guy to casually catch. You want real excitement? Watch Manchester United play a game of football (and I’d rather no-one refer to the sport as soccer). It’s fast and intense, and if any of you played the game properly you’d realise that it’s NOT a sissy sport. And while I’m on the subject, I’d like to ask the guys who invented American football why they didn’t have enough imagination to think of a name for the sport, why did they have to steal the name of a sport that already exists? The next time you’re in the UK, go and watch a football match. The atmosphere inside all the stadiums is fantastic, and if you’re lucky, you may get into a fight afterwards. ---
**Author:** ![mouthbreather](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a698b9/32.png) [@mouthbreather](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mouthbreather)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2001, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-sports-so-boring/66131/2 "2001-05-21T23:51:10Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Magic Merlin \* > \*\*In American football, the crowd get all excited when a player runs more than 5 yards without dropping to the ground. And as for baseball, all that sport seems to be about is a guy throwing a ball to another guy who hits it up into the air with his bat for another guy to casually catch. > > You want real excitement? Watch Manchester United play a game of football (and I’d rather no-one refer to the sport as soccer). It’s fast and intense, and if any of you played the game properly you’d realise that it’s NOT a sissy sport.\*\* ::ponders for a moment:: Y’know, this guy is right! I’ve never thought about it like that before. This stuff is pure gold. Did you ever consider becoming a speechwriter? Here, my whole life I thought I had quite a few good reasons for liking baseball and FOOTBALL, but here comes magic merlin, and with a poof and some smoke – he changed my mind! I see that this is the second post, I can’t wait to dive into the fountain of knowledge that surely is contained in his other post. (On top of that, I finally learned that Wales is in the UK…I was sure was somewhere in Montana…but I digress.) I’m just glad he’s here to set the record straight. Merlin, I did play soccer for 7 years. I don’t know if that qualifies in your eyes as “playing the game properly” or not. I am not here to bash it. I do not think it is a sissy sport. They are some of the best-conditioned athletes in the world. However, conditioning does not equal excitement – If it did, people would look forward to the Boston Marathon TV event instead of the Super Bowl and the World Series. Soccer is not a bad sport, it has its merits, and I may even watch a game here and there (if there’s no baseball or football on). Just remember that you could go to a turtle race, and if you got drunk enough, it would seem exciting. [sub]For once in a VERY rare occasion, I’m hoping Krispy Original shows up…I have a feeling he and MM would get along smashingly.[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![London\_Calling](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/49beb7/32.png) [@London\_Calling](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/London_Calling)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2001, 12:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-sports-so-boring/66131/3 "2001-05-22T00:10:56Z")
Look guys, the fresh meat has arrived… I’d like to take this opportunity to thank Magic Merlin and the Welsh nation for their contribution to the pantheon of world sports: Sheep worrying and Slapper Zeta-Jones riding anything with a film script about its person - not necessarily mutally exclusive contributions. We’re all terribly grateful. And what the fuck is a Welshman doing singing the praises of Man U – if you have to resort to English football for examples of excitement, why not suggest a team that _is_ actually exciting to watch (like Leeds or Liverpool). I fail to see anything “exciting” about those boring Manc’s. What **is** the world coming to ?? ---
**Author:** ![Magic\_Merlin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df788c/32.png) [@Magic\_Merlin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Magic_Merlin)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2001, 12:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-sports-so-boring/66131/4 "2001-05-22T00:34:33Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by mouthbreather \* > \*\* > Just remember that you could go to a turtle race, and if you got drunk enough, it would seem exciting.[/sub] > \*\* That explains it! Now I know why so many Americans watch the superbowl! Thank you mouthbreather, it’s all perfectly clear now. As for whether seven years of playing football constitutes as playing it properly, I’m afraid it doesn’t (not in the US anyway). Playing the sport properly is playing it in a country where people know how to play it. Football players are well toned, and I know that doesn’t automatically mean the sport is exciting, but I never said it did. But you can have well toned athletes and an exciting sport at the same time, and football is an example of that (American football on the other hand, is an example of not at all well toned ‘athletes’ playing a boring sport). And anyway, why do you call that baseball competition the World Series? How many countries actually take part in it? Think about this America : football is the most popular sport in the world, and just about the only country where it’s not the most popular sport is the USA. Is the entire world wrong, or are you wrong? ---
**Author:** ![Max\_Torque](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Max\_Torque](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_Torque)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2001, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-sports-so-boring/66131/5 "2001-05-22T00:42:23Z")
Perhaps other nations prefer soccer because plain ol’ round balls are cheap, whereas a funny shaped ball plus lots of padding plus goal posts adds up to big expense? When your fifth-world nation manages to stockpile some extra turnips or whatever your GNP is based on, perhaps you’ll be able to play a real sport as well… ---
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2001, 12:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-sports-so-boring/66131/6 "2001-05-22T00:49:52Z")
So let me get this straight - _you_ don’t understand the attraction of these sports, so that means they’re boring and not exciting. Have you ever played either of these sports? Take your own advice: If _you’d_ played these sports properly, you’d realize there is strategy and skill involved. This line gives away your ignorance of the game: > [@](#): > > all [baseball] seems to be about is a guy throwing a ball to another guy who hits it up into the air with his bat for another guy to casually catch. First off, he’s not throwing it to the batter. He’s throwing to the pitcher, who is trying to get the ball past the batter. And as for the casual catch, it’s not so casual if you have to run a ball down and catch it in mid-stride, or dive for it, or judge it’s trajectory in the wind, or try to catch with the sun in your face. We’ll skip the myriad possibilities of things that can go wrong with ground balls. In baseball, as the batter, you try to get inside the pitcher’s mind and determine what he’ll throw at you. As the pitcher, you have to know the batter’s strengths and weaknesses in order to get the out. As a team, you have to worry about the steal, the bunt, the hit & run. And before anyone pops in with the thought that the best hitters in baseball _fail_ 7 out of 10 times (a .300 batting average)- don’t bother. You stand at the plate, there’s 8 guys in front of you ready to catch that ball when you make contact. You have to sneak the ball between them somehow. Plus, a pitch traveling the distance of 60 feet 6 inches at 85-90 mph gives the batter less than a second to decide whether or not to swing at that ball. Batting .300 means the batter _succeeds_ every 1 out of 3 or 4 at bats. Not bad, I think, given the above conditions. In short, if you don’t know anything about the sport, then shut the hell up about it. How can you expect your opinions to be taken seriously, if you don’t even bother to learn what you’re bitching about? I could say that all soccer is to me is a bunch of guys running around a large field kicking a ball back and forth. Your argument would be that I don’t understand the sport. That’s true, I don’t. But I don’t criticize fans of the sport, because I know there must be more to it than that or else it wouldn’t be so damned popular. And what the hell is this line? > [@](#): > > The atmosphere inside all the stadiums is fantastic, and if you’re lucky, you may get into a fight afterwards. Wow! Really?! Cuz I don’t go to games to _watch the game_ or anything, oh no. I can watch on TV. I go the games to get my ass kicked afterwards! That’s a manly activity for you! Fuckin’ moron. And then this: > [@](#): > > Think about this America : football is the most popular sport in the world, and just about the only country where it’s not the most popular sport is the USA. Is the entire world wrong, or are you wrong? Now the whole country of America is wrong for not liking soccer? This does not make soccer any more exciting, just more popular. IIRC, _Home Alone_ was the highest grossing film when it was released. I doubt anyone would equate the popularity of _Home Alone_ as it being the best film that year. You get my point? Popularity does not equal quality. Another example would be the unexplained success of Adam Sandler. ---
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2001, 12:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-sports-so-boring/66131/7 "2001-05-22T00:57:40Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Crunchy Frog \* > \*\*First off, he’s not throwing it to the batter. He’s throwing to the pitcher, who is trying to get the ball past the batter. \*\* Of course that should read, “He’s throwing it to the **catcher** , and is trying to get the ball past the batter.” ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2001, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-sports-so-boring/66131/8 "2001-05-22T01:00:42Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Magic Merlin \* > **In American football, the crowd get all excited when a player runs more than 5 yards without dropping to the ground.** You mean, kinda like rugby? > [@](#): > > **And as for baseball, all that sport seems to be about is a guy throwing a ball to another guy who hits it up into the air with his bat for another guy to casually catch.** You mean, kinda like cricket? I won’t even go into the absurdity of mentioning Man U. as an example of “exciting” football. I’m not a big fan of American Football either. But to each his own, says me. Why would deliberately try to stir the pot on a (predominantly) American message board? Did you read the user agreement when you signed on? My advise is: don’t watch American Football. I’m sure there’s a sheep that’s just waiting for your hot lovin’ at 3 AM. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Cynical](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ee59a6/32.png) [@Mr.Cynical](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Cynical)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2001, 1:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-sports-so-boring/66131/9 "2001-05-22T01:16:52Z")
Why do American sports bore you? Probably cause you’re a nationalist idiot whose only exposure to culture came from the petri dish you were conceived in. Dry up. Blow away. ---
**Author:** ![Magic\_Merlin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df788c/32.png) [@Magic\_Merlin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Magic_Merlin)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2001, 1:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-sports-so-boring/66131/10 "2001-05-22T01:24:54Z")
FANTASTIC! It’s really great to see that I’ve truly infuriated someone! Thank you Crunchy Frog! And do you really have to try and catch the ball with the sun shining in your eyes!? Oh, I take back everything! That proves to me that you need all the skill in the world to play baseball. As for the line about you may get into a fight afterwards, I admit I wrote that just for a bit of controversy. The vast majority of football matches go peacefully. Coldfire : I must have missed what it said in the agreement about not being allowed to say that American sports are crap. ---
**Author:** ![London\_Calling](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/49beb7/32.png) [@London\_Calling](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/London_Calling)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2001, 1:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-sports-so-boring/66131/11 "2001-05-22T01:31:38Z")
**BBBAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA** humbug 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Magic\_Merlin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df788c/32.png) [@Magic\_Merlin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Magic_Merlin)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2001, 1:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-sports-so-boring/66131/12 "2001-05-22T01:32:41Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Manservant Hecubus \* > \*\*Why do American sports bore you? > > Probably cause you’re a nationalist idiot > > \*\* What makes you think that I’m a nationalist? The only problem I have with America is the sports, and anything which implies otherwise was said in good humour. Don’t be so touchy everyone. ---
**Author:** ![CBEscapee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/b19c9b/32.png) [@CBEscapee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CBEscapee)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2001, 1:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-sports-so-boring/66131/13 "2001-05-22T01:36:08Z")
[QUOTE] \*Originally posted by Magic Merlin \* \*\* > [@](#): > > As for whether seven years of playing football constitutes as playing it properly, I’m afraid it doesn’t (not in the US anyway). Playing the sport properly is playing it in a country where people know how to play it. > > Think about this America : football is the most popular sport in the world, and just about the only country where it’s not the most popular sport is the USA. Is the entire world wrong, or are you wrong? \*\* Magic, I happen to be a fan of football and can really appreciate the athletecism,skill and physical conditioning that the players posess. Now then, in the latest FIFA rankings I see England ranked 14th and the USA next at 15th with Wales ranked a lofty 110th! So for a country where the game is _improperly played_ and it’s not all that popular to start that’s not too shabby. The rest of the world should be thankful it’s not the most popular sport. Because if it was the most popular IMHO we’d probably be a dominate force to be reckoned with. ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2001, 1:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-sports-so-boring/66131/14 "2001-05-22T01:41:54Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Magic Merlin \* > **FANTASTIC! It’s really great to see that I’ve truly infuriated someone! Thank you Crunchy Frog!** No, my lad. It’s fine to rant in the Pit, and I suppose ranting about American sports is just as good or bad as ranting about SUV’s, ABBA, the Kyoto Treaty, and fat dogs. _However_, the point of this message board is **not** to “bait” people with remarks just to get a rise out of them. If you want to rant about baseball, that’s fine. State your case, ask questions, explain why you hate it so much. But **don’t** deliberately bait people, or your stay here may be a very short one. Glad we got that out of the way. Carry on. [Edited by Coldfire on 05-21-2001 at 08:44 PM] ---
**Author:** ![Snooooopy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ee7513/32.png) [@Snooooopy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snooooopy)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2001, 1:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-sports-so-boring/66131/15 "2001-05-22T01:43:33Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Magic Merlin \* > \*\* > > > [@](#): > > > > \*Originally posted by Manservant Hecubus \* > > \*\*Why do American sports bore you? > > > > Probably cause you’re a nationalist idiot > > > > \*\* > > What makes you think that I’m a nationalist? The only problem I have with America is the sports, and anything which implies otherwise was said in good humour. Don’t be so touchy everyone. \*\* We’re busy stealing hockey from Canada – would that addition improve your opinion of American sports? As for soccer/non-American football, we will steal it when it pleases us. ---
**Author:** ![Crunchy\_Frog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ebca7d/32.png) [@Crunchy\_Frog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crunchy_Frog)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2001, 1:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-sports-so-boring/66131/16 "2001-05-22T01:46:53Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Magic Merlin \* > **FANTASTIC! It’s really great to see that I’ve truly infuriated someone! Thank you Crunchy Frog!** I am not infuriated, I was trying to explain a sport which you obviously do not understand. However, your glee at the thought of having infuriated me only convinces me that you are simply looking to provoke negative reponses and this line reinforces that thought: > [@](#): > > As for the line about you may get into a fight afterwards, I admit I wrote that just for a bit of controversy. You also said to Coldfire, “I must have missed what it said in the agreement about not being allowed to say that American sports are crap.” He was referring to not being a jerk, which you are obviously striving to be. DNFTT ---
**Author:** ![Myrr21](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e495f1/32.png) [@Myrr21](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Myrr21)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2001, 1:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-sports-so-boring/66131/17 "2001-05-22T01:49:02Z")
Obviously us Americans can’t play “football” properly. I mean, it’s not like our women whupped all y’all mutherfuckers… …oh wait, they did. Besides, _real_ Americans know that while (American) football is the best for watching, lacrosse is the best for playing. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Jodi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/7feea3/32.png) [@Jodi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jodi)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2001, 2:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-sports-so-boring/66131/18 "2001-05-22T02:41:37Z")
Bill Bryson, on cricket (and I trust this will be short enough to avoid a copyright problem): > [@](#): > > After years of patient study (and with cricket there can be no other kind) I have decided that there is nothing wrong with the game that the introduction of golf carts wouldn’t fix in a hurry. It is not true that the English invented cricket as a way of making all other human endeavors look interesting and lively; that was merely an unintended side effect. I don’t wish to denigrate a sport that is enjoyed by millions, some of them awake and facing the right way, but it is an odd game. . . . > > Imagine a form of baseball in which the pitcher, after each delivery, collects the ball from the catcher and walks slowly with it out to center field; and that there, after a munute’s pause to collect himself, he turns and runs full tilt toward the pitcher’s mound before hurling the ball at the ankles of a man who stands before him wearing a riding hat, heavy gloves of the sort used to handle radioactive isotopes, and a mattress strapped to each leg. Imagine moreover that if this batsman fails to hit the ball in a way that heartens him sufficiently to try to waddle forty feet with mattresses strapped to his legs, he is under no formal compunction to run; he may stand there all day and, as a rule, does. If by some miracle he is coaxed into making a misstroke that leads to him being put out, all the fielders throw up their arms in triumph and have a hug. Then tea is called and everyone retires happily to a distant pavilion to fortify for the next siege. Now imagine all this going on for so long that by the time the match concludes autumn has crept in and all your library books are overdue. There you have cricket. Sounds fascinating. :rolleyes: It seems to me that many games appear boring to people who don’t understand them. ---
**Author:** ![SPOOFE](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c5a1d2/32.png) [@SPOOFE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SPOOFE)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2001, 3:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-sports-so-boring/66131/19 "2001-05-22T03:31:05Z")
So this guy thinks soccer is **exciting**?!? Y’know, my high school geometry teacher thought it should simply be called “Kick” for a reason… (Then again, I’m just not a big fan of sports. Give me a good game of Quake any day) ---
**Author:** ![mouthbreather](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a698b9/32.png) [@mouthbreather](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mouthbreather)\ **Post date:** [May 22, 2001, 3:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-sports-so-boring/66131/20 "2001-05-22T03:49:40Z")
**CBEscapee** already made this point, I would just like to provide links and restate it, so that Merlin will be sure to address it. > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Magic Merlin \* > As for whether seven years of playing football constitutes as playing it properly, I’m afraid it doesn’t (not in the US anyway). Playing the sport properly is playing it in a country where people know how to play it. Latest FIFA Rankings: (found [here](http://www.soccernet.com/global/news/2001/0411/20010411fifarankings.html)) > [@](#): > > FIFA WORLD RANKINGS… > 1 (1) Brazil > 2 (2) France > 3 (3) Argentina > 4 (4) Italy > 5 (5) Portugal > 6 (6) Czech Republic > 7 (7) Spain > 8 (11) Germany > 9 (10) Paraguay > 10 (8) Netherlands > 11 (9) Yugoslavia > 12 (13) Romania > 13 (12) Mexico > 14 (17) England > 15 (14) Colombia > 16 (14) Norway > 17 (18) Croatia > **18 (16) United States** > 19 (24) Sweden > 20 (20) Russia > > \*Previous FIFA World Rankings in brackets \* Also from that page: > [@](#): > > **Wales are unchanged at 109th in the world** So, Magic Merlin, our newest friend, any comments on why your home country has to move up 91 spots in the world rankings to catch a country that obviously doesn’t know how to play? Hmmm? 🙂 :wally [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-sports-so-boring/66131.md?page=2)