# Why are american women (particularly southerns) so judgemental of men? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [August 3, 2015, 11:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-women-particularly-southerns-so-judgemental-of-men/726931 "2015-08-03T23:48:11Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2015, 12:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-women-particularly-southerns-so-judgemental-of-men/726931/21 "2015-08-04T12:30:29Z")
> [@Senegoid](#): > > Let me throw this observation into the toxic witches’ brew we’re stirring here . . . I have an observation too. Anyone else notice that justjake has nothing to say on any topics besides the ones he starts himself? Funny, that. ---
**Author:** ![GrumpyBunny](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/bc8723/32.png) [@GrumpyBunny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrumpyBunny)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2015, 12:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-women-particularly-southerns-so-judgemental-of-men/726931/22 "2015-08-04T12:32:32Z")
> [@justjake](#): > > Seriously, the stereotype is lame, i’m on one of those dating sites and so many women have told me i’m not their type (i live in the south) because i’m not a “redneck guy” or a “southern guy” or they like guys who “like to get down n dirty with them” The problem is location, not you. I had similar problems when I lived and was dating down south. “You’ve NEVER been married? And you don’t have ANY kids?” when I was \*\*30 \*\*was a ridiculous question, as was, “Wow, you’ve read all those books?” when a guy saw the overflowing bookshelves in my apartment. :smack: I also didn’t care one bit if the Gators or Bulldogs or 'Noles won, or if a small thermonuclear device went off in the middle of the Jag-wires game. And I hate beer. Throw in a good deal of secondary education, and as a woman, you are out of the market. No one wants the sports-indifferent bluestocking. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2015, 1:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-women-particularly-southerns-so-judgemental-of-men/726931/23 "2015-08-04T13:28:53Z")
I only date rich people who own Maseratis. ---
**Author:** ![Missy2U](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/3bc359/32.png) [@Missy2U](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Missy2U)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2015, 1:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-women-particularly-southerns-so-judgemental-of-men/726931/24 "2015-08-04T13:53:35Z")
> [@Shagnasty](#): > > No, few of them listen to both types of music. Bwahahaha 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Abracadebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/f04885/32.png) [@Abracadebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Abracadebra)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2015, 1:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-women-particularly-southerns-so-judgemental-of-men/726931/25 "2015-08-04T13:57:26Z")
> [@Anaamika](#): > > I only date rich people who own Maseratis. With brakes looked at by a professional mechanic. ---
**Author:** ![Blaster\_Master](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/cab0a1/32.png) [@Blaster\_Master](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blaster_Master)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2015, 1:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-women-particularly-southerns-so-judgemental-of-men/726931/26 "2015-08-04T13:58:11Z")
> [@justjake](#): > > In a sense where the “perfect” guy is a man who goes mudding, fixes cars, wears hats, and drinks watered down american beers all the time. > > Seriously, the stereotype is lame, i’m on one of those dating sites and so many women have told me i’m not their type (i live in the south) because i’m not a “redneck guy” or a “southern guy” or they like guys who “like to get down n dirty with them” > > It’s ridiculous, i have to be some moron who rolls around in dirt and uses tools to be attractive and masculine? > > Cool, i’ll stay woman-like then. I’m proud too. 100%. A lot of people like to blame the opposite gender–in my experience, it’s more likely men blaming women–when they can’t get dates. But when you look at what you’re complaining about, it doesn’t make sense. If a woman is looking for something you’re not, unless your goal is a fling, it’s unlikely that you’d be happy in a relationship with such a woman. I guess it’s possible that you’d find out you have other stuff in common than that and could be happy, but you’re not playing the odds, especially if she says that’s stuff that’s important to her. It’s also possible that she’s not into you for other reasons, maybe she’s not attracted to you, or there’s some other thing in your profile or something you said or just a gut feeling that’s either not something she’s comfortable actually using as a point of rejection, so it’s easier to just reject you for something that’s obvious and immutable about you. After all, it’s quite annoying to someone to give an honest rejection to someone, and have them get mopey and say they’ll change. That all said, I will say it is darn annoying in my experience when I’ve been rejected for something that either is something that’s a good thing, or for not being something I am. Now, again, maybe it’s just a cover on her part, but I’ve been rejected for being too smart, too good looking, too kind, etc. Maybe they thought I was out of their league or not being authentic or something, I dunno. Either way, as annoying as it is, I still don’t blame them. Seriously, if someone is rejecting me based on something that I am, especially if it’s something I see as either fundamental to who I am (like my passions and beliefs) or a positive quality, it’s just saved both of us a lot of time and energy and pain from an eventual break-up because of incompatibility. I think people SHOULD be judgmental of people they’re dating. What else are you doing on a date, or when considering setting up a date, besides sizing them up to see if they’d be a good match? By all means, no one is perfect, but you still need to make judgments. Being judgmental is only a bad thing if it’s based on prejudice, whims, or irrelevant things, but when it comes to a relationship, I’m not even sure how much actually could be that, not only because so much of it is highly subjective, but because it’s self-selecting. And, really, if you’re not having fun and it’s making you feel bitter with the experience, take a break. Dating should be fun. Sure, you’ll have the stinker of a date from time to time, but I’ve still generally enjoyed dates, even if I was ultimately rejected or I wasn’t into her. ---
**Author:** ![Finagle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b19c9b/32.png) [@Finagle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Finagle)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2015, 2:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-women-particularly-southerns-so-judgemental-of-men/726931/27 "2015-08-04T14:02:38Z")
> [@Anaamika](#): > > I only date rich people who own Maseratis. [Even if they’ve lost their license and now they don’t drive?](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BXWvKDSwvls) ---
**Author:** ![OneCentStamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/13edae/32.png) [@OneCentStamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneCentStamp)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2015, 2:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-women-particularly-southerns-so-judgemental-of-men/726931/28 "2015-08-04T14:04:44Z")
American women _really_ want nothing more than a man with a solid grasp of spelling and syntax, but they find it’s easier to put the OP off with the whole “macho man who rides four wheelers” shtick. ---
**Author:** ![ZipperJJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zipperjj/32/211_2.png) [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2015, 2:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-women-particularly-southerns-so-judgemental-of-men/726931/29 "2015-08-04T14:06:57Z")
They wish you were something more than jake. ---
**Author:** ![teela\_brown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d9b06d/32.png) [@teela\_brown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/teela_brown)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2015, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-women-particularly-southerns-so-judgemental-of-men/726931/30 "2015-08-04T20:12:52Z")
City folk just don’t get it! ---
**Author:** ![grude](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e47774/32.png) [@grude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/grude)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2015, 10:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-women-particularly-southerns-so-judgemental-of-men/726931/31 "2015-08-04T22:38:42Z")
> [@Arrogant\_B\_st\_rd](#): > > \ but I’m also about guns, It took more than a decade, but I managed to turn my wife from someone afraid of guns to a more staunch advocate of the right to own a gun for self defense than I am. I think the turning point was when she realized in a country with outlandish gun ownership restrictions every two bit thug has one. ---
**Author:** ![justjake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a587f6/32.png) [@justjake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/justjake)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2015, 11:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-women-particularly-southerns-so-judgemental-of-men/726931/32 "2015-08-04T23:35:59Z")
> [@Wesley\_Clark](#): > > If it makes you feel better, women in Jersey like guys with spiky hair, tans and who take steroids. I guess it depends on the local culture. Damn i like all that shit too! But i don’t do roids! Guess i should go to jersey? ---
**Author:** ![justjake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a587f6/32.png) [@justjake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/justjake)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2015, 11:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-women-particularly-southerns-so-judgemental-of-men/726931/33 "2015-08-04T23:42:36Z")
I just kinda assume that the more moronic the activities the men the woman likes are into the smaller his dick is. And he uses that to compensate. For example, if a woman doesn’t like me because i don’t smear dirt on my face and ride HUGE trucks out into the dirt i just assume the reason that guy drives a huge truck is to compensate for his fairly small penis size. Then, regardless of rejection, i feel happy about my self AND penis size. ---
**Author:** ![Rushgeekgirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rushgeekgirl/32/3715_2.png) [@Rushgeekgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rushgeekgirl)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2015, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-women-particularly-southerns-so-judgemental-of-men/726931/34 "2015-08-04T23:46:18Z")
I’m a southern girl (TN) and I’m not looking for any of that! I just want to find a guy who will gently rub my shoulders as I sit here arguing with people on the internet. I don’t know why they’re so hard to find! ---
**Author:** ![HoneyBadgerDC](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/honeybadgerdc/32/1033_2.png) [@HoneyBadgerDC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HoneyBadgerDC)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2015, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-women-particularly-southerns-so-judgemental-of-men/726931/35 "2015-08-04T23:49:44Z")
I spent a good part of my dating years attracting the wrong kind of women. I had adopted a style from my neighborhood that very poorly reflected who I actually was. I was all I knew so it took me a while to figure out I could change that. ---
**Author:** ![madsircool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madsircool/32/3432_2.png) [@madsircool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madsircool)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2015, 11:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-women-particularly-southerns-so-judgemental-of-men/726931/36 "2015-08-04T23:54:39Z")
> [@justjake](#): > > Then, regardless of rejection, i feel happy about my self AND penis size. Well, someone has to be happy with your penis size. ---
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2015, 12:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-women-particularly-southerns-so-judgemental-of-men/726931/37 "2015-08-05T00:49:07Z")
> [@Rushgeekgirl](#): > > I’m a southern girl (TN) and I’m not looking for any of that! > > I just want to find a guy who will gently rub my shoulders as I sit here arguing with people on the internet. I don’t know why they’re so hard to find! [I’m here for you baby!](http://www.explainxkcd.com/wiki/images/b/ba/duty_calls.png) ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2015, 3:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-women-particularly-southerns-so-judgemental-of-men/726931/38 "2015-08-05T03:34:44Z")
[Yep, we’re bitches all right.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e8z1EzDouNs) ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2015, 3:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-women-particularly-southerns-so-judgemental-of-men/726931/39 "2015-08-05T03:44:41Z")
Honestly, it’s because they have standards and don’t want to date guys who suck. Do you know how much time me and my friends had to spend looking fly for the bitches back when we were in our teens and 20s? A lot. I’m from the Northeast though. I can’t really speak to Southern girls. People down south seem like they’re into this whole New World aristocracy thing. ---
**Author:** ![Lancia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lancia/32/17174_2.png) [@Lancia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lancia)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2015, 3:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-women-particularly-southerns-so-judgemental-of-men/726931/40 "2015-08-05T03:51:51Z")
> [@Anaamika](#): > > I only date rich people who own Maseratis. How _you_ doin? 😉 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-women-particularly-southerns-so-judgemental-of-men/726931.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-american-women-particularly-southerns-so-judgemental-of-men/726931.md?page=3)