Why are ass cracks hairy?

In My Humble Opinion
21

I was nervous about posting here- would I be banished from Womanhood forever for admitting that I have a few hairs in my ass crack? Or would I merely be mocked and ridiculed because women don’t have ass crack hair and I’m a freak?

I’m glad braver souls than I posted first. Yes, I have hair in what may be construed as my ass crack- it is an extension of the pubic hair, and really doesn’t continue all the way to the top of my ass crack. It’s not a lot of hair, but I have noticed a few when I had that horrible ass crack itch that required aggressive means of scratching.

No partner of mine will probably believe that I have ass crack hair unless I spread my cheeks and shoved it in his protesting face. Like I said, it’s not a lot of hair, but it does exist.

22

Well that would be anecdotal information.

Altough I’ll take a look at it. Not much else to do tonight.

23

This is a little more comprehensive. I’ve never seen it but I’ll take your word for it.

24

Ass Crack Hair or A.C.H. acts as a baffle to slow the movement of air caused by excessive flatulence. Remove this baffle and the speed of the escaping air can cause a vertex in the ass crack itself that creates a vacuum in between the butt cheeks which causes the underwear to be sucked into your butt-crack. This is the leading cause of “skid-marks” or “tracks of the fecal monkey” as it’s called in some places. Women don’t have as pronounced A.C.H., as we all know girls don’t fart.

25

“Though they sometimes sit next to dogs who do.” – Buddy Hackett

Which, of course, is why dogs have hairy ass cracks. :slight_smile:

26

I feel so close to all of you. Maybe a little too close. How am I supposed to keep a straight face when meeting strangers that I know all about their ass cracks already?
:smiley:

(Tracks of the fecal monkey, indeed.)

27

ACH is really to catch and retain dingleberries.

Apart from that I know nuffink

28

Ass cracks are hairy so as to make them distinguishable from breast cleavage.

Otherwise you’d be confusing one for the other all the time.

29

You might, most of us wouldn’t.

Incidentally, have you seen an optician recently :smiley:

30

Whew! I was starting to feel very alone here. :slight_smile: Yeah, I mean, we’re not talking about a giant forest here, but hair exists.

31

I think ass crack hair is left over from our caveman days to prevent the anus from freezing shut in cold whether. This would be especially important for men because they would have to wander off to hunt. Being exposed to the elements and trying to use the loo at the same time is not a good combination. Thus, you need extra insulation there. The guys who had hairless cracks would get frozen anuses, constipation, and eventually die from a lack of nutrients.

32

I can’t believe I’m posting in a thread about ass crack hair. My mother would faint if she knew…

My GF has more hair down there than I do, and I have a fairly populated forest myself.
She says all her sisters have hairy butt cracks too.
I didn’t ask how she knew that particular fact, though I’ve been dying to ask.

33

“Hairy Butt Crack.” I would join a band just to have this as the name. Or maybe “Frozen Anus.”

34

OK, perhaps others have noticed, but the ads I’m getting at the bottom are

Concrete Repair

Meet Hairy Men

Hairy Cell Leukemia

Basement Crack Repair.

Just thought I’d share… Incidentally, do people want to “find hot hairy guys locally online?”

35

What the…

Whoever posted that to Craigslist plagiarized it. I remember reading that on alt.tasteless back in the mid-90’s.

36

While I can’t answer this specific question, there’s nothing teleological about asking what purpose a given feature serves.

37

“It’s not a bug, it’s a feature!”

38

To keep you from going ass-to-mouth.

39

That may be true of asking if there’s any advantage to having ass-crack hair, but the the OP’s assumption that the hair there must exist to serve some purpose is purely teleological thinking.

40

:dubious: Then why are some of the hairier asses I’ve seen are on black guys (who I assume get there DNA from Africa which is mostly pretty warm.)