# Why are conservatives such dicks? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [August 7, 2009, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-conservatives-such-dicks/505657 "2009-08-07T16:54:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2009, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-conservatives-such-dicks/505657/81 "2009-08-07T21:46:36Z")
> [@astorian](#): > > Rush Limbaugh sets GOP policy? Really? Pretty much, yes. Look how they suck up to him, how they don’t dare to defy him; he’s the de facto leader. ---
**Author:** ![mswas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e99b99/32.png) [@mswas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mswas)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2009, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-conservatives-such-dicks/505657/82 "2009-08-07T21:47:59Z")
> [@elucidator](#): > > Babies are high-caloric food sources. Wait I am confused, I thought it was liberals who liked to kill babies. ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2009, 9:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-conservatives-such-dicks/505657/83 "2009-08-07T21:51:13Z")
> [@mswas](#): > > Wait I am confused, I thought it was liberals who liked to kill babies. Who said the babies were dead when the conservatives ate them? ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2009, 9:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-conservatives-such-dicks/505657/84 "2009-08-07T21:51:19Z")
You’re right. You are confused. ---
**Author:** ![begbert2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/begbert2/32/3357_2.png) [@begbert2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/begbert2)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2009, 10:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-conservatives-such-dicks/505657/85 "2009-08-07T22:04:17Z")
> [@mswas](#): > > Wait I am confused, I thought it was liberals who liked to kill babies. Liberals only kill babies in self-defense. You’d be surprised how often this comes up. ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2009, 10:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-conservatives-such-dicks/505657/86 "2009-08-07T22:06:09Z")
> [@begbert2](#): > > Liberals only kill babies in self-defense. > > You’d be surprised how often this comes up. “It’s just a baby!” “Look at the _ **bones** _, man!” ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2009, 10:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-conservatives-such-dicks/505657/87 "2009-08-07T22:51:51Z")
> [@msmith537](#): > > More important, when did conservatives become such lunatics? > > I grew up on the conservatism of Ronald Regan, George Bush Sr and Rudolph Guiliani. The types of conservatives who defeated the Soviets in the Cold War, won the first Gulf War and turned NYC from a shithole into a place where people actually wanted to live. > > There is a reason why so many moderates have been fleeing the Republican party. It’s because they don’t want to be associated with what has become the party of right wing nutjobs, religeous fanatic fundamentalists and red neck bigots. I’m 60, and grew up in Massachusetts when Republicans were people like Eliot Richardson, Frank Sargent, Endicott Peabody, and other such Brahmin types. Nationally there were people like Nelson Rockefeller. Privileged white guys from the upper strata, for sure, but I can’t see a one of them feeling at home in the snarling, Bible-pounding, anti-intellectualistic, race-baiting “conservative” wing of American politics as it stands now. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2009, 10:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-conservatives-such-dicks/505657/88 "2009-08-07T22:57:11Z")
> [@EddyTeddyFreddy](#): > > I’m 60, and grew up in Massachusetts when Republicans were people like Eliot Richardson, Frank Sargent, Endicott Peabody, and other such Brahmin types. Nationally there were people like Nelson Rockefeller. Privileged white guys from the upper strata, for sure, but I can’t see a one of them feeling at home in the snarling, Bible-pounding, anti-intellectualistic, race-baiting “conservative” wing of American politics as it stands now. IIRC, Barry Goldwater warned that this was going to happen – that the Republicans would be fucked if you let the religious conservatives run the show. ---
**Author:** ![holmes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e95f7d/32.png) [@holmes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/holmes)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2009, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-conservatives-such-dicks/505657/89 "2009-08-07T23:14:04Z")
and now [Palin…!](http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/08/07/palin-obamas-death-panel_n_254399.html) > [@](#): > > The America I know and love is not one in which my parents or my baby with Down Syndrome will have to stand in front of Obama’s “death panel” so his bureaucrats can decide, based on a subjective judgment of their “level of productivity in society,” whether they are worthy of health care. Such a system is downright evil. These ‘conservatives’ are going to start getting other people killed with this talk. ---
**Author:** ![mswas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e99b99/32.png) [@mswas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mswas)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2009, 11:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-conservatives-such-dicks/505657/90 "2009-08-07T23:23:27Z")
> [@holmes](#): > > and now [Palin…!](http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/08/07/palin-obamas-death-panel_n_254399.html) > > These ‘conservatives’ are going to start getting other people killed with this talk. Yeah what’s funny about that is that healthcare is already rationed. I don’t have full choice as to who I pick as my Doctor. Somehow I bet UHC would have a broader network than my current insurance. ---
**Author:** ![Cisco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ccd318/32.png) [@Cisco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cisco)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2009, 11:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-conservatives-such-dicks/505657/91 "2009-08-07T23:37:14Z")
Conservatives _are_ dicks. They’re reckless, arrogant, stupid dicks. And Liberals are pussies. And then there are assholes. Pussies don’t like dicks, because pussies get fucked by dicks. But dicks also fuck assholes; assholes that just want to shit on everything. Pussies may think they can deal with assholes their way. But the only thing that can fuck an asshole is a dick, with some balls. The problem with dicks is, they fuck too much or fuck when it isn’t appropriate - and it takes a pussy to show them that. But sometimes, pussies can be so full of shit that they become assholes themselves . . . because pussies are an inch and half away from ass holes. I don’t know much about this crazy, crazy world, but I do know this: If you don’t let us fuck this asshole, we’re going to have our dicks and pussies all covered in shit! ---
**Author:** ![Crafter\_Man](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crafter_man/32/458_2.png) [@Crafter\_Man](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crafter_Man)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2009, 11:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-conservatives-such-dicks/505657/92 "2009-08-07T23:59:12Z")
As a libertarian, I think liberals are dicks and conservatives are dicks. But IMO modern-day liberals tend to be bigger dicks than modern-day conservatives. The modern-day liberal is \*\*\*extremely \*\*\*anti-choice, and has completely embraced fascism and totalitarianism. Fuck 'em. ---
**Author:** ![Crafter\_Man](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crafter_man/32/458_2.png) [@Crafter\_Man](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crafter_Man)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2009, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-conservatives-such-dicks/505657/93 "2009-08-08T00:00:55Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > IIRC, Barry Goldwater warned that this was going to happen – that the Republicans would be fucked if you let the religious conservatives run the show. I completely agree. Seriously. Likewise, the Democrats would be fucked if you let the socialists run the show. ---
**Author:** ![mswas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e99b99/32.png) [@mswas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mswas)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2009, 12:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-conservatives-such-dicks/505657/94 "2009-08-08T00:03:07Z")
> [@Cisco](#): > > Conservatives _are_ dicks. They’re reckless, arrogant, stupid dicks. And Liberals are pussies. And then there are assholes. Pussies don’t like dicks, because pussies get fucked by dicks. But dicks also fuck assholes; assholes that just want to shit on everything. Pussies may think they can deal with assholes their way. But the only thing that can fuck an asshole is a dick, with some balls. The problem with dicks is, they fuck too much or fuck when it isn’t appropriate - and it takes a pussy to show them that. But sometimes, pussies can be so full of shit that they become assholes themselves . . . because pussies are an inch and half away from ass holes. I don’t know much about this crazy, crazy world, but I do know this: If you don’t let us fuck this asshole, we’re going to have our dicks and pussies all covered in shit! I’ve heard that before, where’s that from? ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2009, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-conservatives-such-dicks/505657/95 "2009-08-08T00:24:24Z")
> [@holmes](#): > > and now [Palin…!](http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/08/07/palin-obamas-death-panel_n_254399.html) > > These ‘conservatives’ are going to start getting other people killed with this talk. And I’m quite sure that’s what they want; it’s a common practice with them. Whip up their true believers until one actually attacks or kills someone, and then pretend to be horrified. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2009, 12:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-conservatives-such-dicks/505657/96 "2009-08-08T00:26:42Z")
> [@Crafter\_Man](#): > > I completely agree. Seriously. Likewise, the Democrats would be fucked if you let the socialists run the show. You have YET to define socialism, shitstain. For you, it seems to be this massive boogey man, but I’ve never heard you actually tell us WHAT socialism really IS. Goldwater, on the other hand, was concerned about people like Falwell, Robinson, Swaggert, etc and their ilk having a say and influence on politicians. ---
**Author:** ![Crafter\_Man](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crafter_man/32/458_2.png) [@Crafter\_Man](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crafter_Man)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2009, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-conservatives-such-dicks/505657/97 "2009-08-08T00:28:56Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > You have YET to define socialism, shitstain. For you, it seems to be this massive boogey man, but I’ve never heard you actually tell us WHAT socialism really IS. [http://lmgtfy.com/?q=socialism](http://lmgtfy.com/?q=socialism) ---
**Author:** ![Dick\_Dastardly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/c4cdca/32.png) [@Dick\_Dastardly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dick_Dastardly)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2009, 12:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-conservatives-such-dicks/505657/98 "2009-08-08T00:32:04Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > You have YET to define socialism, shitstain. For you, it seems to be this massive boogey man, but I’ve never heard you actually tell us WHAT socialism really IS. > > Goldwater, on the other hand, was concerned about people like Falwell, Robinson, Swaggert, etc and their ilk having a say and influence on politicians. The GOP’s Taliban wing get to meet with politicians and talk to them but it’s the GOP’s Enron wing that has all the influence. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2009, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-conservatives-such-dicks/505657/99 "2009-08-08T00:37:08Z")
> [@Crafter\_Man](#): > > [http://lmgtfy.com/?q=socialism](http://lmgtfy.com/?q=socialism) I didn’t ask for socialism in general – I asked how YOU define it – and why it is so evil, in your eyes. ---
**Author:** ![Crafter\_Man](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crafter_man/32/458_2.png) [@Crafter\_Man](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crafter_Man)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2009, 12:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-conservatives-such-dicks/505657/100 "2009-08-08T00:40:23Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > I didn’t ask for socialism in general – I asked how YOU define it – and why it is so evil, in your eyes. Socialism already has a definition – look it up. Why do I need to re-define it? As for why I believe it is evil… because I believe in the free individual. What would be more interesting is why you believe socialism is such a good thing. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-conservatives-such-dicks/505657.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-conservatives-such-dicks/505657.md?page=6)