Well, there’s a difference between calling a Sailor a “squid” and a “fucking squid”.
You mean an “effing squid” agrees with a Coastie?
Since Ranger Jeff has reanimated this thread:
No such animal. There’s the Merchant Marine (the organisation), and there are merchant mariners (members of said organisation). The Brits, by the way, refer to their organisation as the Merchant Navy.
“Puddle Pirates”. 
Strange. I remember reading about that in All Hands – and unless I am grossly confused, I read about it whilst working on a job that I only had during the winter of '92-'93. I assumed at the time that TPTB just wanted us to copy the Marines.
Though as I recall, we didn’t actually load them, as the topside watch did.
And while I’m thinking about it, @robby , you were an officer, right? Were we low-life bluejackets required to salute NOAA and USPHS officers in uniform? (I’m thinking probably “yes”, since one would generally be within saluting range before noticing the differences in their uniforms.)
IME, yes. A commissioned officer in the uniformed services is a commissioned officer, even if the service in question isn’t an armed service.
Yes, the uniform is a nicety originally established to allow members of those organizations the protections in a war zone accorded to any uniformed party, combatants or not. But it’s a real commission with a real uniform and all the responsibilities and privileges attached thereunto.
Agree.
Even US FDA employee officers in uniform, we’d salute them.
Could be worse. Could be “space cadets”.
Only in the first round. After that, you are promoted to Space Captain.
Is that a part of the Space Force? (many may think I made that up but I didn’t…it’s real: United States Space Force - Wikipedia)