# Why are silent farts so evilly foul? **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [January 7, 2003, 2:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-silent-farts-so-evilly-foul/147072 "2003-01-07T02:32:34Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Lobsang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobsang/32/4067_2.png) [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2003, 2:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-silent-farts-so-evilly-foul/147072/1 "2003-01-07T02:32:34Z")
When someone exterminates all nearby life with their arse it is known as an SBD (Silent But Deadly) Why _are_ the silent ones so deadly? Interestingly - it is still possible for the fart’s owner to revel in it as if it were the divinest scent on earth, despite it’s murderous power. ---
**Author:** ![Meatros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Meatros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Meatros)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2003, 2:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-silent-farts-so-evilly-foul/147072/2 "2003-01-07T02:39:07Z")
Are you actually looking for a factual answer on this?? BTW-My farts stink. I know they stink. They have never smelled good to me…Maybe I’m missing out… ---
**Author:** ![Lobsang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobsang/32/4067_2.png) [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2003, 2:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-silent-farts-so-evilly-foul/147072/3 "2003-01-07T02:46:21Z")
> [@](#): > > Are you actually looking for a factual answer on this?? I am sure one exists. (I really am looking for a factual answer) ---
**Author:** ![Hermann\_Cheruscan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b782af/32.png) [@Hermann\_Cheruscan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hermann_Cheruscan)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2003, 2:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-silent-farts-so-evilly-foul/147072/4 "2003-01-07T02:46:32Z")
This doesn’t seem like a factual question to me. Apparently, standards have been loosened around here lately. ---
**Author:** ![Reeder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c6cbf5/32.png) [@Reeder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Reeder)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2003, 2:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-silent-farts-so-evilly-foul/147072/5 "2003-01-07T02:47:33Z")
WAG…because they are almost pure gas. The loud ones are mostly swallowed air. ---
**Author:** ![scr4](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/59ef9b/32.png) [@scr4](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scr4)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2003, 2:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-silent-farts-so-evilly-foul/147072/6 "2003-01-07T02:47:38Z")
Probably the same reason a quiet engine feels more powerful than one with a blown muffler: it’s more powerful than you’d guess from the noise. ---
**Author:** ![Lobsang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobsang/32/4067_2.png) [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2003, 2:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-silent-farts-so-evilly-foul/147072/7 "2003-01-07T02:56:46Z")
> [@](#): > > Apparently, standards have been loosened around here lately I am sure standards are as they always were. Why if I remember rightly - last time I did a search on ‘fart’ in GQ there were posts dating back a long way. ---
**Author:** ![Lobsang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobsang/32/4067_2.png) [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2003, 3:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-silent-farts-so-evilly-foul/147072/8 "2003-01-07T03:00:03Z")
I am SOOOO glad the SDMB didn’t let me post what I was about to post! (the 60 second rule blocked me) ---
**Author:** ![SlickRoenick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e68b1a/32.png) [@SlickRoenick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SlickRoenick)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2003, 3:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-silent-farts-so-evilly-foul/147072/9 "2003-01-07T03:01:57Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Lobsang \* > \*\*I am SOOOO glad the SDMB didn’t let me post what I was about to post! > > (the 60 second rule blocked me) \*\* Well now ALL of us want to know what you were gonna post. So let’s have it! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![pravnik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8edcca/32.png) [@pravnik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pravnik)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2003, 3:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-silent-farts-so-evilly-foul/147072/10 "2003-01-07T03:05:29Z")
I think it just seems that way because you haven’t received the audio warning and had a chance to brace yourself. ---
**Author:** ![Meatros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Meatros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Meatros)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2003, 3:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-silent-farts-so-evilly-foul/147072/11 "2003-01-07T03:06:09Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Lobsang \* > \*\*I am sure one exists. > > (I really am looking for a factual answer) \*\* Alright, in an effort to ferrit out the truth, here’s my anecdotal evidence: It’s not the silent ones that stink particularly, it’s the farts that **burn your ass** on the way out that really stink. ---
**Author:** ![Lobsang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobsang/32/4067_2.png) [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2003, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-silent-farts-so-evilly-foul/147072/12 "2003-01-07T03:08:34Z")
Ok, I won’t post it as-was. But I will explain. I was about to post a witty reply to Herman Cheruscan’s post about a mispelled word. After I pressed submit I checked with MS Word, only to find out that the word was spelled correctly afterall. I came back to eat humble pie - and saw to my relief the ‘no more than one post every 60 seconds’ spiel. boring eh. I bet you wish I kept quiet afterall. ---
**Author:** ![raygirvan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ac91a4/32.png) [@raygirvan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/raygirvan)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2003, 3:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-silent-farts-so-evilly-foul/147072/13 "2003-01-07T03:41:17Z")
I would say **Reeder** is nearest to the mark on this one. Noisy farts imply a large volume of gas: mainly swallowed air or methane from vegetable material such as brassicas or beans which are high-fibre and passing rapidly through the gut - both of which possibilities are relatively odorless. Quiet ones imply a small volume of gas, probably from decay of static protein material in the gut, which smells bad. ---
**Author:** ![racer72](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/racer72/32/3075_2.png) [@racer72](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/racer72)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2003, 3:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-silent-farts-so-evilly-foul/147072/14 "2003-01-07T03:44:53Z")
I always thought SBD farts were quieter because they have a higher moisture content. They slide out without the drag of a dry fart and because of the moisture, the smell in more concentrated. And you have a higher probability of skidmarks in your shorts too. ---
**Author:** ![Larry\_Mudd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f14d63/32.png) [@Larry\_Mudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Larry_Mudd)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2003, 3:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-silent-farts-so-evilly-foul/147072/15 "2003-01-07T03:52:23Z")
> [@](#): > > And you have a higher probability of skidmarks in your shorts too. Um, cite? Actually, never mind. I’m sure I don’t want to know where you picked up that idea. :lame winking smilie: ---
**Author:** ![sweepkick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/87869e/32.png) [@sweepkick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sweepkick)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2003, 3:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-silent-farts-so-evilly-foul/147072/16 "2003-01-07T03:58:59Z")
Oi, I know of what you speak, Lobsang. It’s simply a matter of evolution. Over the eons, the forefathers of our species which emitted especially foul and mal-odiferous feats of gaseous prowess in an audible way were mercilessly slain, or sometimes (very occassionally) ostracized in such a manner that they would be unable to procreate further. Those lucky enough to posess the talent of emitting an uncommonly noxious cloud in a silent manner lived on, and passed the ability onto their offspring. Today in our civilized world, we have come to the point where we might be proud of such a feat, and during social events such as the Superbowl (save for mixed-company), we might be apt to take credit for such a transgression. But make no mistake about it… the raised eyebrows, watering eyes, and feelings of discontent and unspoken anger are more a testament to the original feelings of destroying the malefactor than your ability to provide it without cost. 🕶 ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2003, 4:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-silent-farts-so-evilly-foul/147072/17 "2003-01-07T04:11:47Z")
Between this and the \*\*Velocity of Fart \*\* thread from way back… we dopers have an obsession with flatuence. ---
**Author:** ![kniz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/c37758/32.png) [@kniz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kniz)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2003, 4:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-silent-farts-so-evilly-foul/147072/18 "2003-01-07T04:56:30Z")
The bad smell of a fart is caused by bacteria, which have been dining and it is their waste that causes the methane and the smell. As stated a loud fart is usually swallowed air with possibly some methane mixed in. A small one is pure methane caused by those smelly little germs (a condensed version, you might say.) This also explains why shit smells so bad. ☹ [sup]Why did I feel it was necessary to contribute this piece of knowledge?[/sup] ---
**Author:** ![clayton\_e](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c57346/32.png) [@clayton\_e](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/clayton_e)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2003, 5:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-silent-farts-so-evilly-foul/147072/19 "2003-01-07T05:01:02Z")
Uh, Thanks **kniz.** (why isn’t there a nauscious smilie?) ---
**Author:** ![samclem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a9a28c/32.png) [@samclem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/samclem)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2003, 5:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-silent-farts-so-evilly-foul/147072/20 "2003-01-07T05:21:21Z")
I have yet to see anyone post a cite showing that loud farts are caused by swallowing air. Nor has there been one posted showing that silent ones are caused by methan gas rather than air. Cite, please? [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-are-silent-farts-so-evilly-foul/147072.md?page=2)