# WHY Can't Computer People Speak Simple ENGLISH?! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [August 13, 2003, 2:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-cant-computer-people-speak-simple-english/194906 "2003-08-13T14:02:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 11\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![E-Sabbath](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e19adc/32.png) [@E-Sabbath](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/E-Sabbath)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 4:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-cant-computer-people-speak-simple-english/194906/141 "2003-08-20T04:17:41Z")
I, uhm, am sort of looking for a PFY of my very own, actually, but… more Bronx, NYish. ---
**Author:** ![if6was9](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/e47c2d/32.png) [@if6was9](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/if6was9)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 4:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-cant-computer-people-speak-simple-english/194906/142 "2003-08-20T04:52:40Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by sturmhauke \* > \*\*Computers appear simple on the surface so that people who don’t know a lot about them can still use them. This concept is called “user friendliness”. Underneath they are indeed pretty fucking complicated, as I said before. If you disagree, please explain the following terms, since they’re so simple: > > Von Neumann architecture > arithmetic-logic unit > multiple pipeline processing > memory cache > sockets > transport layer > system call > UNICODE > ASCII > kernal > IEEE > PCI > SCSI > USB > interrupt > process > task scheduling > TSR > driver > packet > system bus > semaphore > resource allocation > memory leak > virtual memory > routing > data collision > > This test will be graded. \*\* \*\*sturmhauke, I must admit (and apologize…this IS the Pit) that I’ve been a little over the top in this thread. As for your test, I know about 2/3 of your list. But that’s not the point! (or my point) You don’t need to know ANY of those things to run a computer. If you go thru life timid and scared, life will eat you up. On the other hand, if you use a LITTLE common sense, and a little bravery, you can learn to do things you never thought you could! It’s the attiude of the OP that it’s too hard for me that REALLY pisses me off! ---
**Author:** ![Derleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Derleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Derleth)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 10:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-cant-computer-people-speak-simple-english/194906/143 "2003-08-20T10:04:43Z")
> [@](#): > > ASCII For extra credit, explain EBCDIC. For _extra_ extra credit, use it to respond. > [@](#): > > kernal I thought this was a computer list, not a nutty one. (It’s misspelled.) > [@](#): > > IEEE …and how they’re related to how you do math. > [@](#): > > TSR …and why you’ll never write another one. > [@](#): > > \*\*This test will be graded. \*\* And they ain’t no curve. (FTR, I could explain all but the last to a layman in reasonably cogent terms.) ---
**Author:** ![catsix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e19b73/32.png) [@catsix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/catsix)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 2:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-cant-computer-people-speak-simple-english/194906/144 "2003-08-20T14:33:51Z")
Well, **E-Sabbath** , it wouldn’t take much to get me to relocate. 😉 In addition to the ‘get a new job’ goal, I also have this ‘get out of Pittsburgh’ goal. ---
**Author:** ![E-Sabbath](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e19adc/32.png) [@E-Sabbath](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/E-Sabbath)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 2:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-cant-computer-people-speak-simple-english/194906/145 "2003-08-20T14:41:23Z")
It’s a Pimply Faced Youth gig. I need an Igor. Means “makes less than I do” and “You get to reboot computers after I say you can.” Insult to you, alas. ---
**Author:** ![catsix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e19b73/32.png) [@catsix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/catsix)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-cant-computer-people-speak-simple-english/194906/146 "2003-08-20T15:31:20Z")
It’s a foot in a door. At nothing else, once one has been a PFY somewhere, one can become a BOFH, either there or somewhere else. Nothing personal, but I take ‘that job is beneath you’ as offensive. Everyone must _start_ somewhere, and it’s actually quite hard for an engineer to get into any kind of serious admin work because everybody thinks ‘but that job would be an insult to you.’ As for making less than you do, I’m pretty sure that’s the case now. I **have to find a new job** because I cannot continue survival on the one I have. ---
**Author:** ![E-Sabbath](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e19adc/32.png) [@E-Sabbath](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/E-Sabbath)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-cant-computer-people-speak-simple-english/194906/147 "2003-08-20T17:14:23Z")
Oh. Hell, in that case, wait till I get home. I’ll email. Tech work sucks in NYC right now, but what the hell. Least I can do is pass you a couple names, right? 🙂 Didn’t know how serious you were. (Second submission, server refused connection first time) ---
**Author:** ![catsix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e19b73/32.png) [@catsix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/catsix)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 6:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-cant-computer-people-speak-simple-english/194906/148 "2003-08-20T18:12:09Z")
Yeah, pretty serious. My job right now is nice, but it’s not paying a salary I can even live on. I’m not too proud to be a PFY, and at least with me, it’s a little better than constant hand-holding of someone who wants to know if you can hotswap the RAM in a P4 running Windows. 😉 Appreciate it. ---
**Author:** ![sturmhauke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e47c2d/32.png) [@sturmhauke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sturmhauke)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2003, 5:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-cant-computer-people-speak-simple-english/194906/149 "2003-08-21T05:51:33Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by if6was9 \* > \*\*\*\*sturmhauke, I must admit (and apologize…this IS the Pit) that I’ve been a little over the top in this thread. As for your test, I know about 2/3 of your list. But that’s not the point! (or my point) You don’t need to know ANY of those things to run a computer. > > If you go thru life timid and scared, life will eat you up. On the other hand, if you use a LITTLE common sense, and a little bravery, you can learn to do things you never thought you could! It’s the attiude of the OP that it’s too hard for me that REALLY pisses me off! \*\* The whole point of this thread is that Eve’s computer is jacked up. To unjack it, someone has to know the more arcane workings of computers, some of which is not that easy to understand. Your “quit your fucking whining and LEARN, goddammit!” attitude isn’t helping inspire confidence. ---
**Author:** ![JimOfAllTrades](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@JimOfAllTrades](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JimOfAllTrades)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2003, 6:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-cant-computer-people-speak-simple-english/194906/150 "2003-08-21T06:18:32Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Derleth \* > \*\*For extra credit, explain EBCDIC. > > For _extra_ extra credit, use it to respond.\*\* Extended Binary-Coded Decimal Interchange Code C1 C3D6C4C9D5C7 E2E8E2E3C5D4 4DE2C1D4C5 C3D6D5C3C5D7E3 C1E2 C1E2C3C9C95D E4E2C5C4 C9D5 C9C2D4 D4C9C4D9C1D5C7C5 E2E8E2E3C5D4E2 C1D5C4 C3D3D6D5C5E24B ---
**Author:** ![E-Sabbath](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e19adc/32.png) [@E-Sabbath](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/E-Sabbath)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2003, 11:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-cant-computer-people-speak-simple-english/194906/151 "2003-08-21T11:04:30Z")
That’s not explaining it. This is explaining it: Standards are fun! There’s so _many_ to choose from! Basically, back in the day when IBM was frantically trying to keep its computers from being compatable with anyone else’s, they decided to use a variation of their punch card programming as a character code. It’s kind of entertaining in that letters don’t always follow one another: A+1 may not equal B. It’s also missing a lot of punctuation. If you think saving as plain text is bad… this was worse. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-cant-computer-people-speak-simple-english/194906.md?page=7)