# WHy can't I like the nice, stable ones, dammit? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 27, 2002, 6:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-cant-i-like-the-nice-stable-ones-dammit/121087 "2002-07-27T06:05:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 7\ **Page:** 10
**Author:** ![whiterabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/cab0a1/32.png) [@whiterabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/whiterabbit)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2002, 10:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-cant-i-like-the-nice-stable-ones-dammit/121087/181 "2002-08-20T22:04:55Z")
It’s been eight months for my SO and me, and we have yet to have a phone conversation under an hour, and every time I think about him (which is almost all the time!) I get all fluttery and silly. I don’t think my feet touched the ground during January or February, it was that bad. The difference now is that I can tone the flutteriness down when I need to. But ONLY if I need to. It’s fun! ---
**Author:** ![Eva\_Luna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e495f1/32.png) [@Eva\_Luna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eva_Luna)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2002, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-cant-i-like-the-nice-stable-ones-dammit/121087/182 "2002-08-21T16:25:42Z")
Darnit, I _have_ to get some sleep, or I will not be able to function! Hung out with Guy Formerly Known as Dude #2 last night (should we call him GFKADN2, or does anyone have a better idea? Maybe we should just call him #1 Dude?). We met up at 9:00 at the video store, rented “Meet the Parents,” and went to my place to crack open a bottle of wine and laugh like goofballs at Ben Stiller. When the movie ended, we talked once again about everything under the sun, while listening to more extremely random and obscure music (again, he’s the only person I’d ever met who had ever heard of the band; he knew most of the songs in the original Swedish. This sort of thing happens a LOT with him). What’s the problem then, you ask? I’m having too much fun with him, and couldn’t manage to make myself kick him out until after 3 a.m. I rationalized to myself that since my recent stupid and annoying insomnia has been waking me up around 3:30 or 4 am most of the time anyway, no matter what time I go to sleep, that maybe if I went to sleep really late, I could at least sleep through until my alarm went off a 6:00. If I’m going to be awake at ridiculous hours and get 3-4 hours of sleep a night, I figure, I’d much rather spend the extra time cuddling and laughing with a charming and interesting guy than staring at the ceiling alone in bed. (He laughed pretty hard at my rationalization, though. Easy enough for him; I have to leave for work by 7:30 am, while he can pretty much show up whenever he feels like it, usually by 11 or 12.) I have basically no willpower where this guy is concerned, even if we are taking it pretty sloooooow in the physical department (which is still fine by me, and I’m somewhat curious to see how long it will remain fine by me). So does anyone see issues with this, beyond the obvious sleep deprivation? (I’m thinking in terms of relationship dynamics.) ---
**Author:** ![Lok](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e8c25b/32.png) [@Lok](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lok)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2002, 8:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-cant-i-like-the-nice-stable-ones-dammit/121087/183 "2002-08-22T08:28:02Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Eva Luna \* > \*\*I have basically no willpower where this guy is concerned, even if we are taking it pretty sloooooow in the physical department (which is still fine by me, and I’m somewhat curious to see how long it will remain fine by me). So does anyone see issues with this, beyond the obvious sleep deprivation? (I’m thinking in terms of relationship dynamics.) \*\* The only problem I see with relationship dynamics is the fact that **I don’t have any!** You, OTOH, seem to be doing really well. Have fun. Lok ---
**Author:** ![Eva\_Luna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e495f1/32.png) [@Eva\_Luna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eva_Luna)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2002, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-cant-i-like-the-nice-stable-ones-dammit/121087/184 "2002-08-23T16:55:28Z")
Looks like my thread is dying a slow death, but of happiness. (What a way to go!) Going once…going twice… ---
**Author:** ![Bad\_Hat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/f0a364/32.png) [@Bad\_Hat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bad_Hat)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2002, 9:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-cant-i-like-the-nice-stable-ones-dammit/121087/185 "2002-08-24T09:50:46Z")
it was a good thread. definitely my most active here. for a few weeks, every day i searched for this thread to see the progress. I hate to see it go, and maybe it doesn’t have to, but I’m at a loss for meaningful contributions at this point. Stoked for ya Eva, glad things are going well. As for here, ATG and I are friendly, nothing more. I whish i could explain it, everything was great on paper, but it just never translated to major chemistry. maybe that’ll change, maybe not. Tonight i went ot Wiskeyblue downtown with a friend from out of town and we chatted up a couple of chicks in chicago for vacation. Hung out with them all night, much fun was had by all. Going to dinner with them tomorrow night, but as they are from different states, as is my friend, i’m not sensing any major potential. It was super-fun though. I’m just enjoying life, and trying to spend as much time on the lake bike path as possible before weather prohibits. Thanks for an awesome thread, Eva. and congrats on cool dude again. Keep us posted. (and feel free to email me anytime). Chris (who knows he shouldn’t post drunk, but cannot help himself) ---
**Author:** ![Eva\_Luna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e495f1/32.png) [@Eva\_Luna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eva_Luna)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2002, 10:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-cant-i-like-the-nice-stable-ones-dammit/121087/186 "2002-08-24T10:10:53Z")
Hi, Bad Hat! I’m up, too, although up again rather than still up. Y’know, your typing is better when you’re drunk! Well, judging by past life experiences, y’all haven’t seen the last of Eva Luna weighing in on heavy romantic issues. The Guy Formerly Known as Dude #2 is coming with a bunch of my oldest and dearest friends to Viva! Chicago Latin Music Fest tonight, so if he survives the screening, I have very high hopes. My next romance thread with probably involve my neurosis about whether a perfectly nice and decent guy really likes me, or whether I’m simply ignorning signs of impending doom. Or who knows? Maybe there won’t be a next Eva Luna neurotic romance thread, and I’ll have to find something positive and uplifitng to post on! (Or maybe I’ll just stick to the Chechens, even if nobody else does give a damn about them.) Anyway, it’s been fun, guys, and thanks for playing! I’ll keep you posted if circumstances warrant. ---
**Author:** ![SkipMagic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skipmagic/32/20706_2.png) [@SkipMagic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SkipMagic)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2002, 5:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-cant-i-like-the-nice-stable-ones-dammit/121087/187 "2002-09-04T17:34:49Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by auntie em \* > \*\*It’s a boat I’ve certainly been in before, but this time was sort of different. I mean, usually if I’m not feeling any crotch-sparks, I just chalk it up to lack of chemistry and walk away. This time, however, I was having SUCH a good time with this fella and just liked him SO MUCH that I kept seeing him, despite the fact that I wasn’t having those special little twinkly feelings (which made me feel like a giant tease, because I knew he WAS having twinkles for ME, but my fundamental selfishness overruled my sense of fair play). > > But I did keep going out with him, and lo and behold! One day, when I least expected it, I felt the special little sizzle of a crotch spark or two… At that point I wasn’t sure if it was the boy or the wine I’d consumed, but I decided to roll with it, so I planted a big, juicy one on him (which confused the hell out of him, because I’d already issued the flashing neon “JUST FRIENDS” mandate)… He complied nicely and the rest, as they say, is history. > > Things are going well. 🙂 \*\* Lucky guy, that man. Any woman that habitually uses “crotch sparks” to symbolize her juicy yearnings in her personal, fleshy Netherlands, is a chick (bird, dame, legs, foxxxxxxy mamma) worth going after and, if it all works well and her sparks start her inner woodpile a smoulderin’, keeping for as long as she will let ya’ keep her. And, of course, for as long as she wants to keep you. I’d be jealous, lady. Perfectly jealous. That is, if I didn’t already happen to get snagged by a woman just like you. And, as you said, things are indeed going well. Very well. 🙂 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-cant-i-like-the-nice-stable-ones-dammit/121087.md?page=9)