# Why did the naked chicken cross the road? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 6, 2003, 1:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-naked-chicken-cross-the-road/153186 "2003-02-06T13:34:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![WIGGUM](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/ce7236/32.png) [@WIGGUM](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WIGGUM)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 1:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-naked-chicken-cross-the-road/153186/1 "2003-02-06T13:34:02Z")
To kick the slop out of the scientist t who created his ugly ass. [http://www.accessatlanta.com/ajc/news/0502/21chicken.html](http://www.accessatlanta.com/ajc/news/0502/21chicken.html) First it was “Mike the Headless Chicken” and now this. ---
**Author:** ![Astroboy14](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/df705f/32.png) [@Astroboy14](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Astroboy14)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 1:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-naked-chicken-cross-the-road/153186/2 "2003-02-06T13:40:22Z")
Well, on the positive side it WILL save some young country lads the time it would take to undress their dates… ---
**Author:** ![London\_Calling](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/49beb7/32.png) [@London\_Calling](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/London_Calling)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 1:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-naked-chicken-cross-the-road/153186/3 "2003-02-06T13:45:49Z")
Hell, if a naked / plucked chicken doesn’t remind me of my own genitals, I ain’t eatin’ it … and mine ain’t look like that since an unfortunate incident involving paint stripper falling in the bath tub. ---
**Author:** ![Winston\_Smith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/e95f7d/32.png) [@Winston\_Smith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Winston_Smith)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 1:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-naked-chicken-cross-the-road/153186/4 "2003-02-06T13:48:16Z")
:eek: ---
**Author:** ![welby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/d78d45/32.png) [@welby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/welby)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 2:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-naked-chicken-cross-the-road/153186/5 "2003-02-06T14:01:52Z")
Does anyone see this thread going anywhere but down from here? ---
**Author:** ![Searching\_For\_Truth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/4da419/32.png) [@Searching\_For\_Truth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Searching_For_Truth)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 2:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-naked-chicken-cross-the-road/153186/6 "2003-02-06T14:08:56Z")
**Welby** , I don’t see how the thread could have gone up to begin with. ---
**Author:** ![WIGGUM](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/ce7236/32.png) [@WIGGUM](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WIGGUM)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 2:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-naked-chicken-cross-the-road/153186/7 "2003-02-06T14:21:40Z")
The chicken needs a name. I suggest “Sackie the Chicken”. ---
**Author:** ![Delta-9](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3be4f8/32.png) [@Delta-9](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Delta-9)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-naked-chicken-cross-the-road/153186/8 "2003-02-06T14:43:59Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by WIGGUM \* > \*\*The chicken needs a name. \*\* “Wrinkles” “Scrote” ---
**Author:** ![Monstre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e274bd/32.png) [@Monstre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monstre)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-naked-chicken-cross-the-road/153186/9 "2003-02-06T17:15:20Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by WIGGUM \* > **The chicken needs a name.** “Gertie the Geriatric Flamingo” ---
**Author:** ![welby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/d78d45/32.png) [@welby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/welby)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-naked-chicken-cross-the-road/153186/10 "2003-02-06T17:40:59Z")
Scrotus Maximus? Scrotoclese? Hmm, then again, **Fugly** is the best descriptor. ---
**Author:** ![Zoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/a4c791/32.png) [@Zoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zoe)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-naked-chicken-cross-the-road/153186/11 "2003-02-06T17:50:49Z")
Flattened Fauna? ---
**Author:** ![XJETGIRLX](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/9fc29f/32.png) [@XJETGIRLX](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/XJETGIRLX)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-naked-chicken-cross-the-road/153186/12 "2003-02-06T18:53:58Z")
Is anyone else as disturbed as I am that this thing is bright flaming red? Now I’ll keep expecting them to taste like strawberry. ---
**Author:** ![LolaCocaCola](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7cd45c/32.png) [@LolaCocaCola](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LolaCocaCola)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-naked-chicken-cross-the-road/153186/13 "2003-02-06T19:20:24Z")
Hey, now! That’s what you call a big, red cock! ---
**Author:** ![xenothrope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/7ab992/32.png) [@xenothrope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xenothrope)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-naked-chicken-cross-the-road/153186/14 "2003-02-06T19:24:41Z")
Just a thought… I remember back in grade school that what made birds BIRDS was the fact that they had feathers. Sooooo IF he truely has NO feathers… is it still truely a bird? pheer the possibilities. -x out ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 7:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-naked-chicken-cross-the-road/153186/15 "2003-02-06T19:25:38Z")
Sodomites rejoice. ---
**Author:** ![WIGGUM](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/ce7236/32.png) [@WIGGUM](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WIGGUM)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-naked-chicken-cross-the-road/153186/16 "2003-02-06T19:47:11Z")
What? No jokes about choking the chicken? ---
**Author:** ![LurkMeister](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3da27b/32.png) [@LurkMeister](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LurkMeister)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-naked-chicken-cross-the-road/153186/17 "2003-02-06T20:05:24Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by welby \* > \*\*Does anyone see this thread going anywhere but down from here? \*\* I would think if they don’t have feathers they probably don’t have down either. ---
**Author:** ![Feynn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ecb155/32.png) [@Feynn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Feynn)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-naked-chicken-cross-the-road/153186/18 "2003-02-06T22:59:12Z")
I’ll try to take this up a notch… I’m a chicken lover and should clarify this by saying that I am neither a militant vegetarian or P.E.T.A. member bent on saving the lives of chickens everywhere. I love my chickens when they’re stuffed and roasted, stir fried, deep fried, and especially as vindaloo or souvlaki. The production of chickens leaves much to be desired and I cannot see how current production methods are going to really benefit from using featherless chickens. Sure, you won’t have to use 1000’s of gallons of scalding water to expedite the plucking process but in the case of large commercial broiler operations, putting flocks of 20,000 to 100,000 bald chickens into an area where they can barely move isn’t going to be good. Without feathers they will have no protection against abrasion or injury from their fellows and if you’ve ever seen a large flock of chickens you would know they are a nasty lot. Open wounds are an invitation to be attacked. Commercially raised broilers have a life expectancy of about 42 days and in this time will live in the same compound which will only be cleaned after that batch is slaughtered. To say that the living conditions are filthy and disgusting is an understatement and this is why commercial broilers are given large doses of antibiotics to prevent disease. This may change how broilers are produced so all in all, it could be a good thing. So with that aside, I am going to have to print of a wallet sized photo of “Scrote” so I can accost people with “Hey… wanna see my big red cock?” and then show them the picture. ---
**Author:** ![Achernar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e274bd/32.png) [@Achernar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Achernar)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2003, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-naked-chicken-cross-the-road/153186/19 "2003-02-06T23:05:46Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Feynn \* > The production of chickens leaves much to be desired and I cannot see how current production methods are going to really benefit from using featherless chickens. Sure, you won’t have to use 1000’s of gallons of scalding water to expedite the plucking process Did you read the article? They’re not only looking to save money on plucking. Here’s the supposed benefit: > [@](#): > > The less fatty, crossbred chickens will fare better in tropical climates, where expensive cooling systems are needed to raise poultry, Hebrew University’s Avigdor Cahaner said Tuesday. The new birds are also better for the environment because the absence of feathers eliminates the need for water and electricity to run machinery in processing them for food. ---
**Author:** ![Feynn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ecb155/32.png) [@Feynn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Feynn)\ **Post date:** [February 7, 2003, 12:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-naked-chicken-cross-the-road/153186/20 "2003-02-07T00:07:54Z")
Achernar - I read the article and my comprehension is quite good. I hope you read what I wrote as well. I understand that featherless chickens will cost less to house and process but believe there could be some drawbacks if they were raised as they are now. Eliminating or reducing cooling costs and not needing as much water for processing would save a lot of money and be more environmentally friendly. Putting 20,000 - 100,000 naked chickens into a barn with no room to move in less than sanitary conditions just isn’t appealing, and I can see this as causing other problems like greater mortality and increased incidences of diseases for the birds and even possibly, the consumers of those birds. I met a farmer the other day who sells free range chickens and eggs… I’ll be calling him up the next time I feel like doing some chicken loving. Loving as in “I would love some chicken souvlaki”. Mind you, if one was inclined to engage in the other kind of chicken loving, the lack of feathers might afford some variety in one’s choice of dates. Can we all say, “eeeeeeeeeew!” I can see the topic of featherless chickens hitting Great Debates in no time at all. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-naked-chicken-cross-the-road/153186.md?page=2)