# Why did the risotto taste and smell like vagina? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [July 26, 2007, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-risotto-taste-and-smell-like-vagina/413270 "2007-07-26T19:15:23Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2007, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-risotto-taste-and-smell-like-vagina/413270/81 "2007-07-27T15:26:43Z")
[QUOTE=Autolycus] Sure it was fun, but what about your needs? That was some selfish risotto. [/QUOTE] No, no - “shellfish”. Try to keep up here! ---
**Author:** ![Telperien](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/65b543/32.png) [@Telperien](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telperien)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2007, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-risotto-taste-and-smell-like-vagina/413270/82 "2007-07-27T15:28:58Z")
[QUOTE=Malacandra] No, no - “shellfish”. Try to keep up here! [/QUOTE] Aaarrrggghhh! ---
**Author:** ![Devorzhum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/f4b2a3/32.png) [@Devorzhum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Devorzhum)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2007, 4:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-risotto-taste-and-smell-like-vagina/413270/83 "2007-07-27T16:02:53Z")
What you actually had was their New England Vagina Risotto, which is their normal run. Once a month however, they serve the Manhattan Vagina Risotto - Do not Under any circumstances go for the Manhattan Vagina Risotto. . . Trust me on this. ---
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2007, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-risotto-taste-and-smell-like-vagina/413270/84 "2007-07-27T16:28:48Z")
Hey! You got your vagina in my risotto! ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2007, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-risotto-taste-and-smell-like-vagina/413270/85 "2007-07-27T16:33:52Z")
The main problem with vagina risotto is that it takes an hour to eat it and then it wants to be eaten again. ---
**Author:** ![Duke\_of\_Rat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ad7895/32.png) [@Duke\_of\_Rat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duke_of_Rat)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2007, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-risotto-taste-and-smell-like-vagina/413270/86 "2007-07-27T16:36:47Z")
[QUOTE=don’t ask] The main problem with vagina risotto is that it takes an hour to eat it and then it wants to be eaten again. [/QUOTE] That, and you can’t eat it with just the tip of your tongue like you see in err…restaurant reviews. You gotta get all off in there with your whole face. ---
**Author:** ![vibrotronica](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/a9a28c/32.png) [@vibrotronica](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vibrotronica)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2007, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-risotto-taste-and-smell-like-vagina/413270/87 "2007-07-27T16:53:04Z")
Why can’t I ever get the pussy risotto? Last week I had a Lenny’s tuna sandwich that tasted like bile. Yes, I ate it anyway. ---
**Author:** ![chowder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/977dab/32.png) [@chowder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chowder)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2007, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-risotto-taste-and-smell-like-vagina/413270/88 "2007-07-27T16:59:38Z")
[QUOTE=Duke of Rat] That, and you can’t eat it with just the tip of your tongue like you see in err…restaurant reviews. You gotta get all off in there with your whole face. [/QUOTE] :::snort::: cheez, I love this board ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2007, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-risotto-taste-and-smell-like-vagina/413270/89 "2007-07-27T17:01:57Z")
Hang on **chowder** - isn’t that just vagina with cream? ---
**Author:** ![Waverly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/57b2e6/32.png) [@Waverly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Waverly)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2007, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-risotto-taste-and-smell-like-vagina/413270/90 "2007-07-27T17:19:32Z")
Was there a side dish on the plate? Maybe just a little bit due south of the risotto? Be careful of that side dish in your rush to get to the risotto. ---
**Author:** ![slitterst](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecc23a/32.png) [@slitterst](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/slitterst)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2007, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-risotto-taste-and-smell-like-vagina/413270/91 "2007-07-27T17:45:57Z")
[QUOTE=SenorBeef] I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with it, but you do the deed for the whole experience, and what it does for her, not because the taste itself is all that appealing. It’s not filet mignon or cheesecake. If they made VaginaBar snacks, would you eat them? 😛 [/QUOTE] You’ve apparently haven’t experienced the right women yet. As to the VaginaBar, it would depend on whom they based the sample flavor on. Some of my exes, no way would I want their Vagina Risotto. ---
**Author:** ![Hampshire](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hampshire/32/4887_2.png) [@Hampshire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hampshire)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2007, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-risotto-taste-and-smell-like-vagina/413270/92 "2007-07-27T17:51:07Z")
I think maybe the real question for you is: “Why do the vaginas of the girls I have been with smell and taste like risotto?” ---
**Author:** ![chowder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/977dab/32.png) [@chowder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chowder)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2007, 6:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-risotto-taste-and-smell-like-vagina/413270/93 "2007-07-27T18:12:10Z")
[QUOTE=don’t ask] Hang on **chowder** - isn’t that just vagina with cream? [/QUOTE] Mmmmm…creamyvagisotto…with bacon salt **Hampshire** Try washing your nads more often ---
**Author:** ![Sapo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ec9cab/32.png) [@Sapo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sapo)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2007, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-risotto-taste-and-smell-like-vagina/413270/94 "2007-07-27T18:51:12Z")
[QUOTE=Zebra] Hey! You got your vagina in my risotto! [/QUOTE] Hey, you got your rissotto in my vagina! ---
**Author:** ![butler1850](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/779978/32.png) [@butler1850](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/butler1850)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2007, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-risotto-taste-and-smell-like-vagina/413270/95 "2007-07-27T18:54:55Z")
[QUOTE=scout1222] Jesus, the last time I saw a line like that it had a fish hook on it. When did Clamato introduce a “bearded” flavor? [/QUOTE] No no no… he said a CLEAN VAGINA. Not one with nasty flavors all saved up in the shorthairs. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Cervaise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cervaise/32/16693_2.png) [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2007, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-risotto-taste-and-smell-like-vagina/413270/96 "2007-07-27T19:20:25Z")
[QUOTE=Devorzhum] Once a month however, they serve the Manhattan Vagina Risotto [/QUOTE] I would say you win the thread except that there are some who have acquired a taste for the Manhattan Vagina Risotto. Just make sure to have a couple of extra wet-naps on hand. ---
**Author:** ![outlierrn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/outlierrn/32/3005_2.png) [@outlierrn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/outlierrn)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2007, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-risotto-taste-and-smell-like-vagina/413270/97 "2007-07-27T21:20:33Z")
Was this seasoned with some kind of fermented product? A sort of yeasty preparation by chance? In all seriousness, I once had a mushroom preparation that smelled like pure, 100%, unadulterated (snerk) Vagina. Were there 'shrooms in your risotta, just a thought. ---
**Author:** ![MikeG](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mikeg/32/4329_2.png) [@MikeG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MikeG)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2007, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-risotto-taste-and-smell-like-vagina/413270/98 "2007-07-27T23:33:27Z")
As a Chicagoan (well mostly I moved up nort a year back) I would like to repeat the request for the name of the place. Just for reference you see. I love risotto and would like to think I would have remembered such a fragrant dish 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2007, 1:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-risotto-taste-and-smell-like-vagina/413270/99 "2007-07-28T01:50:59Z")
[QUOTE=Inigo Montoya] _Note to self: less subtlety on the humor_ Why? = “The Y” – same joke as was later delivered by **The Duke** in log #36. I tell ya, I get no respect. [/QUOTE] Note to self: ratchet up the subtle-ometer. I’m sorry. I’ll give you dap for it, though. ---
**Author:** ![elelle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f0a364/32.png) [@elelle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elelle)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2007, 2:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-risotto-taste-and-smell-like-vagina/413270/100 "2007-07-28T02:30:28Z")
I knew there had to be a reason why the [Dead Milkmen’s “Bitchin Camaro”](http://www.lyricstime.com/dead-milkmen-bitchin-camaro-lyrics.html) was cycling through my brain this week; Here ya go: 'Gina Risotto, 'Gina Risotto The aroma is one to savor 'Gina Risotto, 'Gina Risotto! One tingling tongue of flavor Went out for seafood, risotto A little side dish to match Ya take a whiff, dip on in Hot Tuna, tastes like snatch! I passed over the appetizer One night during the meal Wanted to save it up for the extra Curricular labial appeal 'Gina Risotto, 'Gina Risotto Heavenly on your plate "Gina Risotto, 'Gina Risotto! Clamp down, not too late When I eat in a decent place Fragrant with the musk Lovin’ some 'Gina Risotto Drooling, what’s the fuss? So you’d better get out of my way When I come to your restaurant Cause I’ve got some 'Gina Risotto Mouth feel the best Damn part 'Gina Risotto, 'Gina Risotto! Girl where are ya headed? 'Gina Risotto, 'Gina Risotto! Shellfish smell unfettered [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-risotto-taste-and-smell-like-vagina/413270.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/why-did-the-risotto-taste-and-smell-like-vagina/413270.md?page=6)